by Teresa Hill
“I don’t…” She sputtered. “What did you do to me?”
“Propose?” He seemed confused.
“No, that little…thing between us. Did you feel that?”
“Feel what?”
“Is the room spinning?”
“Kate, the room’s been spinning for me since I met you.”
“It doesn’t spin for me. I mean…we have to be practical about this. There’s so much at stake, so much to consider. It can’t be a purely emotional decision.”
“I know. I made you a list.” He had to stand up to search his pockets until he found a message slip with Mrs. Ryan’s handwriting on it, then flipped it over and held it out to her. “All done.”
She didn’t want to take it, but he shoved it into her hands and let go of it. She either had to take it or let it fall to the ground.
“Go ahead. Read it. It’s step-by-step, just the way you like it. All kinds of things to cross off, one by one.”
Tears welled up in her eyes. Practical, sensible, careful Kate Cassidy’s hands were shaking. She was terrified. Hours ago, when Shannon went into labor and then had her baby, when she decided to give her baby up and Ben had made that ridiculous proposal and then Kathie had found them together and Kate realized her sister was in love with Joe…everything seemed like it was spinning out of control. She’d just wanted to hide in a corner and wait for the storm to end.
This was the part where she always turned and ran, retreated into herself, but this time, Ben wasn’t going to let her.
He’d made her a list:
1. Tell Ben you love him.
2. Say you’ll marry him.
3. Pick a date.
4. Say your vows.
5. Make babies with him. (Hold his hand while you have them.)
6. Live happily ever after.
“That’s it?” she asked. “Just like that? You think it’ll be that easy?”
“Nothing worth having ever is, but I’m not afraid of working hard at making a life with you, Kate, and I know you’re not afraid of working hard, either. You know, there are all kinds of books on how to stay happily married. You’ll love it. You can study them all if you want. I think some of them have check lists. It’ll be great. Same thing with having kids. Lots of lists. You’ll be perfect at it.”
“I am so far from perfect,” she said, crying in earnest and completely unable to stop.
“So am I.”
“And…I was with Joe for five years and didn’t marry him. Five years. We’ve been together for five weeks!”
“Okay, I have to say right now, I’m not waiting five years. I know there’s supposed to be give and take on things like this, but I’ll just have to owe you one. You have to let me win on this. No five years.”
“Five months?” she said, her voice sounding odd and strained, kind of like a squeak.
“Wouldn’t be my first choice, either. How about five more weeks?”
“You can’t plan a wedding in five weeks,” she insisted.
“Hey, I’ve married tons of people. I assure you, it doesn’t take nearly as much fanfare as most people insist on. We just need you and me and another minister and our families, probably some people from my church, Charlotte and her husband, Melanie, Betty, Shannon, the baby and her new family…anybody else just have to be there?”
“I guess not,” Kate said.
“Okay. Five weeks. Deal?”
“I…uhhh… Youuuuu—”
“Come on. Say it.”
“Ben—”
“Wait! I forgot something. Something really important. I’ve been thinking about this off and on for a while, that if things worked out between us…” He took the list from Kate’s hand and added something, drawing an arrow and moving it up on his list, bumping everything else down. “Here.”
She looked at what he’d done.
Felt her heart turn over once more, because it was so perfect.
“You think we should keep her?”
He nodded.
“Our own little girl?”
“I couldn’t let her go now, and I don’t think you could, either.”
“I couldn’t,” she said. “I realized it today. I can’t give her up.”
“So.” He got down on one knee again. “How about it? You’ll marry me?”
Kate was going to say yes. She was ninety-nine percent certain she would have, except someone knocked on the door and then just barged into the room without any kind of invitation.
It was the nurse, bringing the baby.
She looked a little oddly at Ben, down on one knee, in front of Kate, at Shannon on the bed, Shannon who was awake now and looked horrified at the sight of the pink bundle in the nurse’s arms.
“Sorry,” she said. “The adoptive couple is here, and we had instructions to bring the baby to you, sweetheart, and that you’d be introducing them to this little angel. Is that right?”
Shannon shot Kate and Ben a pleading look.
“I’ll take it from here,” Ben said, on his feet, holding out his arms for the baby.
“She really is an angel. Happiest little thing, and so pretty and with a beautiful smile. I don’t care what any of those silly books say. Newborn babies have gorgeous smiles,” the nurse said. “Should I send the couple in now?”
“In a minute,” Ben said.
“Okay.” She turned to Shannon, her hand on Shannon’s arm. “Sweetheart, I want to tell you that one of my son’s wives couldn’t manage to get pregnant for anything in this world, and some wonderful young woman just like you made them parents six months ago and made me a grandmother, and we make absolute fools of ourselves for that child. We love him so much, he’s about to drown in it. Everyone says he’s gonna be rotten one day, but we don’t care. It’s a wonderful thing you’re doing, and don’t let anybody tell you different.”
Shannon started to cry. The nurse did, too.
Once she was gone, Ben walked over to Shannon and put the baby into her arms. Shannon held her like she was made of glass, with love and so much sorrow in her eyes.
Kate stood by her side, gazing down at the baby, and Ben stood by Kate’s side, his arm around her, his body strong and steady against hers. He wouldn’t let either one of them down, not in all of this.
“She is so pretty,” Shannon said.
“A heartbreaker, for sure,” Ben said, bending over to kiss her forehead and then Shannon’s. He put his palm to the baby’s forehead and then to Shannon, whispered a prayer and then smiled down at them. “A little blessing for the two of you. Are you ready to introduce her to her new parents?”
Shannon looked confused, like she’d lost track of what they were doing.
“What is it?” Ben asked.
“I…” She looked from one of them to the other. “But—”
Before she could say anything, a different nurse opened up the door. “Look who I found in the hallway? They can’t wait to come inside.”
She stepped back and held the door open wide.
Tim and Tina were waiting, big grins and tears on their faces. “Is it all right? Can we come in now?”
Kate let them in, thinking she probably couldn’t keep them out at this point. Soon, the four of them were gathered around the bed. There were more tears, more expressions of awe at the baby’s extraordinary beauty and her ability to sleep through the commotion they all made.
It wasn’t until Kate looked from the baby to Shannon’s face that she knew something was wrong.
“Why did you do that?” Shannon asked. “Why didn’t you tell them?”
“Tell them what?” Kate asked.
“About the baby? I woke up while you and Ben were talking. I heard him trying to convince you to marry him, and then I heard the two of you say you wanted to keep the baby, that you couldn’t give her up, and that’s okay with me. Really. But you should have told me, and you should have told them before they came in here and saw her. It’s not fair to them.”
To her right, Tina gasped and
her husband grabbed her hand. Ben tried to keep them calm, and Kate turned to Shannon.
“Shannon, we weren’t talking about the baby,” Kate said.
“No, I heard you. You said, Your own little girl—”
“We were talking about you,” Ben told her, leaving the other couple and coming to stand by Kate’s side, his arm around her waist. “We can’t just let you go. We’ve gotten attached to you, and I think you’ve gotten attached to us.”
Shannon froze. She didn’t bat an eyelash, didn’t seem to so much as breathe for a long moment. “Me?”
“Yes, you,” Ben said. “You deserve the same kind of family you want for this baby, and before you say it, I know you’re going to think that we could keep the baby, too. But you’ve found a wonderful home for your baby, and now I want you to let us take care of you, the way you want her taken care of. You’re still a little girl, Shannon. You deserve to finish high school and go to college, and have someone doing all that stuff fathers and mothers do. We want to do that for you.”
She still couldn’t seem to speak, and it looked as if she was getting scared, just the way Kate would have.
Leave it to Ben to know just what to say.
“Plus, you know what Kate’s wardrobe is like. She needs help, and I loved that outfit you helped her with the other night, when we tried to go to dinner. So, for the sake of her wardrobe alone…you’ve got to stay with us.”
“For her clothes?”
“Well…that and some other things. She hasn’t actually said yes to marrying me yet. I was thinking you could help me convince her.”
“I don’t…I never thought I’d have a family like that,” Shannon said.
Everyone in the room, except for the baby, was crying.
“Look, this is simple,” Ben said. “All anybody has to do, at this point, is to say yes, and we’re done.” He turned to Tim and Tina. “Do the two of you want this baby?”
“Yes,” they said.
“Kate, do you want to marry me?”
“Yes,” she said.
“Shannon? Do you want to be our daughter?”
“Yes.”
“There. What was so hard about that?”
Epilogue
They tried to keep the wedding small and simple, but Kate soon saw that Ben’s congregation absolutely loved him and were genuinely thrilled he was getting married. There was no way any of them could be left off the guest list. And half the town seemed to want to be there, probably just to see if she’d go through with it and if her sister and Joe were coming and whether anyone would get into a fight with anyone else.
So, they gave in and filled up Ben’s church. Kate’s mother’s pastor was thrilled to be asked to perform the ceremony and made it seem as if her mother was there by talking about how much she loved Kate and all that she wanted for her and all her children.
Kate’s brother walked her down the aisle. Her sisters served as attendants, even though Kathie protested. She still felt terribly guilty, no matter how often Kate tried to convince her everything was okay. Kathie had only been nineteen when Kate and Joe met. Apparently, she’d fallen hard for him right away, thinking it was a schoolgirl crush. But it just never went away, and apparently, after their mother died, there’d been some sort of embrace that ended with a kiss. They both still felt too guilty to be seen together, even though the last thing Kate wanted was for them to be miserable. Ben said to give them time, and she hoped he was right.
Shannon and Emily served as flower girls, Emily, was thrilled with her baby sister and truly loved being with Shannon, as well. Tim and Tina had named the baby Mae, after Shannon’s beloved grandmother. The couple and the baby were all there. Emily and Shannon were wearing matching princess dresses, as Emily called them. She’d picked them out, and everyone had been shocked when Shannon agreed to wear hers. Her hair had grown out enough that she’d cut off all the black, and she now had very short, golden-blond curls. She looked beautiful, was doing well in school and seemed to be staring at a boy who attended Ben’s church. She didn’t know it yet, but her adoption papers were working their way through the system. She’d be officially theirs before too long.
And Ben was…well, he was Ben. Steady as a rock, absolutely sure of himself and what they were doing, even if it had only been five weeks since he’d proposed.
His church had turned out to be just like he was, kind and loving and helpful. They’d opened their arms to Kate and drawn her right in. She should have known she’d feel right at home in any place created by Ben.
Marriage to him was going to be an absolute joy.
There’d be tough times, she was sure, but she wasn’t scared of them anymore. She knew they could get through anything.
She felt absolutely at peace and very blessed, while they said their vows, and as he slid her wedding ring onto her finger, she lifted her face for his kiss.
The reception at the church hall was packed. When they hadn’t been able to find a caterer on such short notice, the ladies of the church had taken over, baking and baking and baking. It turned into a potluck, and everything was delicious.
Kate didn’t think she’d ever smiled so much in her whole life, or danced so much or cried so much, she was so happy. She was afraid the party would go on much too long, but Ben would have none of that, grabbing her and announcing to everyone that they’d have to continue without the bride and groom, because he and Kate were leaving. She blushed furiously, and he laughed. Somebody in the back of the room whistled. Then everyone was laughing and hugging them and wishing them well.
“I can’t believe you did that,” she said, as they pulled away in the car.
“Hey, you’re lucky I’m not trying to get you naked in the car. It’s been a very long five weeks.”
It had been, and they’d chosen to wait for their wedding night to make love. They’d been so busy pulling together the wedding, taking care of Shannon, trying to get the adoption process started for her and trying to reassure Kate’s sister that it was okay if she wanted to be with Joe.
But the waiting was over.
“Where are we going?” Kate asked. He’d refused to tell her anything, not wanting her to tell anyone where they were, so that no one could find them.
“Not far.”
They drove for less than thirty minutes, ending up in the mountains at a cabin owned by a friend of his. Nothing around them but trees and sky and a few birds.
“It’s fully stocked for the week. We won’t have to come outside for anything, unless we want to use the hot tub on the back deck,” he said, opening her car door and taking her hand to help her out.
Then he lifted her into his arms and kissed her.
“I’m never sure how guys do this and still manage to unlock the door,” he said, when they arrived at the cabin’s door. “Maybe I’m just not manly enough.”
“Oh, I think you are, but why don’t you just hand me the keys and let me unlock it.”
He did.
The next thing she knew, they were just inside the threshold. The door closed behind them, and he had her in his arms, pressing her back against the door and kissing her.
“I didn’t think we’d ever get here,” he muttered against her lips.
“Me, neither.”
“No one knows. And no calls. No phone. I meant to search you before I let you inside.”
“You can search me if you want,” she said.
“And we’re not leaving. Not for anything.”
“Deal.”
He ran his hands up and down her body, a thoroughly satisfied grin on his face. “Not hiding anything are you?”
“Just some really interesting underwear that Shannon helped pick out.”
“Black leather? Chains? I just can’t see that under this dress.”
“No. Her tastes are changing.”
“Thank goodness.”
Kate was tugging at his tie, unbuttoning his shirt.
He didn’t seem to know where to start with her dress.
/>
“If you want me out of it, you’re really going to have to work for it,” she said. “You wouldn’t believe what it took to get me into this.”
He turned her around and groaned. There were a ton of tiny buttons.
“You did this just to torment me,” he said, starting at her neck and managing to unhook just one, then another.
“I didn’t. I swear.”
“You did.” He laughed, then kissed the bit of her neck he’d uncovered. “And I think you should pay.”
“Pay?”
“Like this.” One more button, one more soft, lingering kiss.
Kate gasped. He knew her neck was so sensitive. And apparently he intended to take his time getting her out of the dress, button by button, kiss by kiss.
She was begging before he was done, hardly able to stay on her feet. The buttons went all the way down her back. She’d never known her back was as sensitive as her neck. It seemed as if there were nerve endings everywhere. She shivered and squirmed, all to no avail. He held her there in place, refusing to be rushed, and his lips were so soft, so insistent. She wanted them everywhere, all over her, didn’t think she’d ever be able to wait as long as it took, until he got to the very last one.
He placed a kiss at the indentation at the bottom of her spine that was nearly her undoing. Her legs buckled, and finally he let her turn around in his arms, her dress falling to her waist. He ripped off his shirt, and finally they were skin to skin, kissing crazily.
“I am not waiting one second longer,” she said, undoing his belt, then his pants.
Somehow he scooped her up and carried her into the nearest bedroom, tugged off her dress and then his pants, and then he was on top of her, sliding inside of her.
“Oh, Ben.”
He didn’t move for the longest time, as they both tried to catch their breaths and remember the moment and try to allow their first time to last. He kissed her softly, sweetly. “Don’t move. I swear, if you move it’s over.”
“I won’t.”
“You are.”
“I’m trying not to. It feels so good.”
He started moving ever so slowly, back and forth, just a bit, and the sensation was exquisite. She groaned and bit her lip and tried so hard to wait, but they’d waited so long. She couldn’t help it. Just having him inside her, on top of her, his arms wrapped around her, all the heat and joy of him. It was too much.
