by M. N. Forgy
I grasp her by the throat to pin her down from hitting me and it’s as if I just injected her with a sedative, she relaxes instantly in my hold. My brows furrow in confusion as I stare at her. Her eyes now open and looking up at me. It seems every time I grab her here it’s as if she gives me complete control of herself. It has to be related to her past.
Shifting next to her, my hand still on her throat I rest my head back on my pillow.
These feelings I have for her are strong. I don’t know if it’s love because I’ve never felt it before. I don’t want to be in love. Nobody will look at me with fear, but as a man who is pussy whipped.
I am not that, nor will I ever be. I am in control, strong, and the fucking vice president of the Sin City Outlaws.
“I don’t love you,” I whisper into the back of her head, making sure she knows I’m not the prince to save her from her fucked up world. I’m the villain in her world, and that needs to be very clear.
“I don’t love you back,” she mutters.
CHAPTER NINE
Alessandra
WAKING UP A HAND is tight around my collarbone and I feel on cloud nine. Safe, and like I’m home. Felix stirs next to me and removes his hand from my throat and it’s as if I was suddenly dumped into an ice bath with the void that is left behind.
Why I feel like that is scary, I shouldn’t like to be held around the throat like that. I can’t help it though, when he does it, I just feel instantly safe. I don’t have to pretend to be in control because I’m giving it to him. I trust him.
Using both hands he runs them down his face and rolls onto his side. His sleepy eyes finding mine.
“Do you remember the nightmare you had last night?” he asks softly. I furrow my brows not remembering waking up at all.
“No.”
“Really?” He tilts his head to the side with disbelief.
I shake my head. “No, I don’t remember anything. Why what happened?” God, I hope I didn’t say anything embarrassing.
“You just started hitting me and yelling. I felt like I was in the ring with WWE or something,” he chuckles, and I can’t help but giggle.
“I get nightmares a lot, they’re always the same,” I mutter, tracing a tattoo of a skull on his arm.
“What are they about?”
I shrug. “A little girl. She’s covered in blood, and scared, pushed to kill. Sometimes the little girl is jumping off a cliff,” I explain. They seem so real and familiar that I’m usually sick the next day after an episode. Felix’s face hardens, and he looks straight up at the ceiling.
“You okay?” I ask. His head snaps to mine, a look of confliction clouding his eyes.
“Yeah,” he mumbles, his tone of voice thick with emotion.
Rubbing his scruffy chin, I can’t help but want to know more about this man.
“Why do they call you Felix?” I ask with a smile, and he turns his head my way.
“Why do you want to know?” he replies with a husky tone that has my nipples budding with longing.
I shrug, as I casually circle that tattoo of a praying lady on his bicep.
“My mother was a club hang around, a slut if I’m being honest. She had a Felix The Cat tattoo on her lower back my dad said. When she had me she left me at the hospital with not so much as a name. She wrote my dad’s name and number on the birth certificate though, and he came and got me; called me Felix,” he tells the story that has my brows furrowing with anger and sympathy. There is no emotion in his tone, as if he’s detached from the most important thing that makes him… him.
“My dad said I look like my mother in the face,” he whispers, and I take notice he doesn’t have the Italian look that Zeek does. His brows and long hair are thick, but his skin is of a lighter color.
“So it’s true, you were raised by the club,” I state rather than ask. They said one of them was raised by the club and has no respect for the law or the well-being of others more so than any of the other men.
“Is that something you learned in the academy?” he smarts with a huff.
I silently laugh. “Actually yeah. It’s kind of crazy they make us learn about you guys before we can pass, but actually seeing you guys up close, I can say they are wrong about you guys,” I mutter softly.
“No, they’re not. It’s just very few get to see a side nobody else does,” he exhales, before running his hands down his face as if he didn’t mean to say that out loud. I can tell by the way he’s tensing he’s done talking about him.
“How is your side?” He pulls the sheets down and inspects my wound. My stomach knots when I notice I’m still naked. I forgot he tore the hospital gown from my body yesterday and pulled me into him like he’d been dying to have me by his side for days.
“It itches, and is a little sensitive,” I inform, watching the beady strings snake in and out of my side.
Felix slides out of bed, and his hard clenched butt cheeks come into full view. Anything painful that might have been on my mind disappears as a blush of desire heats my skin. Rubbing my thighs together I bite my bottom lip and think of anything else but sex.
“I have to go to the station today, make my statement about what happened,” I tell him.
“I’ll take you,” he tells me rather than asks. I can’t help but roll my eyes at his controlling attitude. Same ol’ Felix.
He bends over, messing with the radio and Seether “Broken” thumps through the speakers. I haven’t heard this song in forever. Felix disappears into the bathroom and comes out with a tube of Vaseline.
Kneeling on the floor, he leans over the mattress and dabs some goo on the tip of his finger and slowly, and very carefully applies it to my side. His eyes focused and strong as is hands make me feel more than better.
Suddenly the door is opened and both Felix and I jerk our attention to the door.
Gia stands there in a black Harley shirt and frayed shorts. Her eyes wide and angry as she stares at us. I grab the sheet to cover myself, but Felix just turns his attention back to my wound.
“Get out,” he states with force.
“Why?” she asks. “Why her?” Gia’s voice clogs with emotion.
Felix sighs and stands. Grabbing his junk he pins her with a deathly stare.
“I said get out,” he warns.
“Look at this. Look at you!” she cries, pointing at me.
“What? What is it you think you see?” Felix barks, making me jump where I sit.
“You care for her. I’ve never seen you look or touch someone like you do her.” Tears slip down her face and I almost feel sorry for her.
“You need to go,” Felix repeats, grabbing the door. Gia puts her foot in the door. “Do you love her?” Felix kicks her foot out of the way and slams the door.
I swallow the lump in my throat and avert my eyes back to the bed.
He struts back to the bed, and kneels down.
His eyes pull to mine, and a knowing look crosses his face. His hands slide down to my thighs, and he jerks me to the edge of the bed. I laugh, wrapping my arms around his neck.
Pressing his lips to mine, I kiss him back, lost in the smell of him, his hard touch, and the good music.
This feels too right who cares if anyone outside this room thinks it’s wrong.
He swings us and lays my back onto the floor, my legs straddling around his hard waist. The tip of his throbbing cock brushes against my clit and I suck in a tight breath. A thunderstorm developing between my legs from the anticipation.
Running my nails down his hard chest, I lean forward and grab his sexy nipple between my teeth. His lips against my neck he hisses from the pressure I apply on the delicate skin.
Pulling his lips to my mouth his mouth fits mine perfectly. The warmth of his body throwing my heartbeat into orbit. He slips his hard cock inside of me slowly, and attentively. Dark eyes never leaving mine as he goes as deep as he can inside. His hips slowly make love to me as his tongue mimics his thrusting torso. He stretches me, fills me, and takes
me away from my pain. When Felix and I are together like this, it’s as if we aren’t even on the same planet as everyone else. It’s just him and me in our own world. No one matters, and everything blurs. He’s an outlaw in public and a master in the bedroom.
The sound of his heartbeat grounds me, the brush of his lips across my skin comforts me, the feel of his rough hands along my body claiming me as his.
It’s an emotion all on its own. One I’ve grown addicted to and will be broken and misplaced without.
His long hair falls from his face and tickles my collarbone. Taking my attention from his chest to his head I fist his silky hair as I ride his large cock. The floor bites into my back, the dirt rubbing into my skin as I’m shuffled back and forth. The heat of his body on mine, and the feel of bliss between my legs a piece of heaven I never want to end. If I die, this is how I want to go out. Just like this.
He places a hand by my head on the floor, his arms flexing as he holds himself up. He’s so strong and sexy I want him all to myself, I want to be his. Wrapping my hands around his back I dig my nails in, pulling him closer to me as tingles begin to ignite in my core. My breathing picks up, and pressure builds to heights of pleasure I can’t explain. His brows furrow, his rhythm picking up as he’s about to come with me.
My mouth opens into a shape of an ‘O’, and he gently places his hand on my collarbone and
I free fall into ecstasy, giving every ounce that I am to Felix.
A knock on the door has us snap out of our world, and the door is jerked open. Again.
“GODDAMN IT!” Felix roars, trying to cover my naked body with his own.
“Church, brother,” Machete informs.
Felix snatches the sheet off the bed and throws it over me in a matter of seconds.
“GET THE FUCK OUT!” Felix points at him with a sharp finger. His tone conveying he’s not to be argued with.
Machete chuckles, not taking the tone of Felix seriously as his eyes linger on me a second longer than necessary before closing the door.
“I’ll be back,” he whispers against my lips.
“Okay,” I smile, and he gently pulls out of me.
As I watch him get dressed I wonder when the hell we became this, what I allowed myself to fall into. As I am falling for Felix, and I didn’t want to. I never wanted to fall for any man.
I’m scared of being hurt, scarred, and broken hearted. One-night stands don’t come with shattered hearts, or feelings.
But this, whatever it is. It’s real and happening whether I want it to or not.
It’s out of my control, and that is a first for me.
Felix is showing me how to live, and I’m going to show him how to love. Even if it kills us.
Felix
Sitting at the table I can smell her on my skin, still feel her legs wrapped around me and it’s taking everything I have not to stand up from this table and go back to her. I can still feel her pussy squeezing around my cock, and her nails digging into my back.
I’ve tasted Alessandra, and I can’t forget her flavor no matter how hard I try.
“Did you hear me, Felix?” Zeek asks, and I snap to.
“What?”
“Salvatore at the casino wants to see us again. I need my VP with me,” he tells me.
“What about Alessandra, she has to go to the station today and make a statement?” I ask, trying not to come off like a little bitch, but it’s failing.
“Gatz will go with her and will bring her back as soon as she is done. I need you with me, end of!” Zeek sneers. Rolling my fingers into my palm I clench my fists tight, wanting so badly to punch Zeek in his arrogant mouth. I think he forgets the shit this club went through for Jillian.
“Fine,” I mutter, pushing away from the table. I swear to God if Gatz fucks this up I’ll find that purple dildo and shove it up his ass.
Mac steps in front of me and hands me a phone.
“What’s this?”
“Give it to Alessandra. It’s got a tracker on it, and nobody but I can trace it,” he explains. “Just a precaution,” he continues with a proud smile.
Alessandra wasn’t given a phone with her belongings, so that means someone at the department has it. Probably that Raven bitch, which I don’t trust. It’s her fault Alessandra was nearly killed. Even Alessandra is questioning where Raven’s loyalty lies.
“Hey, can you run Alessandra’s partner Raven in your computer shit?”
He folds his arms and looks at me offended. “Of course, why what is up?”
“I don’t trust that bitch, I want everything you can find on her,” I tell him. “Everything!” I reiterate.
“Yeah, I’ll see what I can dig up.” He shrugs.
“Thanks, man.”
Stepping back into the room Alessandra is dressed and putting her dark hair into a messy ponytail. My chest squeezes wanting to pull her to me and rip her clothes off, something so beautiful should never be covered and I would come through on that deed if duty didn’t call.
“I can’t go with you to the station. Zeek needs me, so Gatz is going to take you,” I tell her before taking a seat on the bed.
She giggles, and pulls my hands from my knees, sitting on my lap.
“You say it like you’re jealous,” she says with a smile. She’s right, I am, and I don’t like it. Not at all. I want to lock her away so nobody can see her but me. Nobody can smell how sweet she is, but me. Nobody can have her, but me.
Sliding my hand up her back I fist her hair hard.
“I’m not a jealous man, but I find myself claiming you.” The words take me by surprise, but they’re true. She is mine, and I won’t take it back. Her eyes flash longingly and she cups my cheek softly. “Do you have a problem with that?” I question.
Her eyes flick between mine before a smirk crosses her gorgeous face.
“I don’t think I have much say in the matter,” she laughs. Leaning forward I rest my lips against her, that unfamiliar feeling in my chest making me feel a million things at once again.
“That’s because you don’t. Neither of us does,” I mutter against her plush lips. My eyes on hers, and the softness she conveys making me feel vulnerable. “I don’t love you,” I tell her, needing to hear myself say it.
Pulling back, she raises a brow. “I don’t love you back.”
I smirk, not fully believing her. The way her hand swayed toward mine in her darkest hour I’d say she cares for me, she just doesn’t want to admit it. She’s a strong creature, like me. Falling in love feels like a weakness as we can’t control it and we control everything.
She slides off my lap, her fine ass swaying back and forth and I can’t help but give it a squeeze. Loving the way it feels in my hands. It’s soft but toned. My dick jumps wanting to stick it in her ass, see her body arch as I fill her.
“I gotta go.” She looks over her shoulder, batting her eyes and my gaze jumps from her ass to her eyes.
“Take this.” I hand her the phone.
She frowns holding it. “I have a phone.”
“Raven has your phone, and I don’t trust her. Take this one, Mac has it souped-up and shit,” I insist. She shrugs and tucks it in her back pocket.
“Fine, only because you’re annoying me,” she replies seriously, before stepping out of the room. That defying mouth, the smell of her lingering in the room. What the fuck is happening to me.
“I don’t love her. I don’t love her. I don’t love her,” I whisper to myself, thudding my fist against the closed door. I can’t love her. I don’t deserve her. I’ve done nothing but been selfish and greedy my whole life, and finding her hasn’t changed me, it made those attributes worse.
I’m a fucking convict and will escort anyone within distance to hell with me… and I’m willing to take Alessandra first fucking class.
Alessandra
Stepping out of the room I find my mother whistling happily and sweeping the floor. She’s wearing jeans and a Sin City Outlaws shirt. Her hair in a black band
ana. She looks good, and happy.
“Hey Mom!” I say cheerfully, not sure if she’s in a moment of clarity or not. She looks over her shoulder and lights up.
“Hey! I was going to come see you but with that big ol biker in there I didn’t know what I’d walk in on,” she winks before laughing. My cheeks turn red, and I rub my neck anxiously. “How are you?” she asks, touching my shoulder tenderly.
“Better, but my stitches feel tight.” I twist my torso with a frown on my body.
“Yeah, your daddy never did like those much either,” she informs, and the smile crossing my face is bittersweet. I’m still torn thinking of him not being my father.
Mac walks out of a room in nothing but a low-rise pair of jeans. He looks at us before doing a double take, his eyes wide as he walks as fast as he can into the bathroom across the hall.
Mom fans herself with her hand not holding the broom.
“That man reminds me so much of your father,” she exhales, and I can’t help but laugh.
“I better go freshen up.” She winks at me before disappearing into another room. I don’t even know what to say to that.
Walking down the hall Gia starts down the hallway. She’s wearing short shorts and a ripped AC/DC shirt. She’d be pretty if she wasn’t after Felix. My shoulders tense, and my resting bitch face immediately falls into place.
She stops in front of me, her hand on her hip.
“You’re still here?” she sneers. “You don’t belong here, and you know it.”
My brows narrow in on her, taking a step toward her. I’m done with the games, and if it means I have to tear her hair extensions out to make my claim on Felix, then I will.
“Felix is mine, and if he hasn’t made that clear, let me. If you so much as flip your hair in his direction I will make your face looks like your botched tit job.” My eyes fall to her unleveled breasts before meeting her gaze. Her mouth drops, a gasp escaping.
“You’re a cop. No matter what you think you have you’ll never be apart of this—”
“I will kill you and I promise you, nobody will find your body,” I threaten, my words not only catching me by surprise but Gia’s jaw falls open with disbelief.
