That certainly seemed possible. Or, if Proctor was the father of Ruth’s child, and Sanders knew, maybe he needed leverage to keep Sanders quiet. If so, couldn’t that mean that Proctor was the person behind the campaign against Grace…trying to get her to leave town before she talked to Sanders?
And what if Proctor feared that Grace would eventually find out what happened to her friend Ruth?
This could be an even more pressing reason for him to encourage the fraternities to drive her out of town. And worst of all, if Grace did finally discover the truth about Proctor and Ruth, or begin to suspect he was behind the campaign against her, how devastating would that have been? To learn that someone she saw as a friend, a confidant, had betrayed her in this fashion. An evil presence she believed could still prove a danger to Berkeley and its students. Students like the young, beautiful, and wealthy Kitty Blaine.
If even half of my fears about Proctor turn out to be true. How do I warn Kitty? Would she even believe me?
“Laura, are you all right?” Seth asked.
She realized she had been staring vacantly into space, not even noticing that Kitty and Seth had followed Celia into the study. She nodded and went over to the table where she had put her books, figuring the best thing would be to focus on getting down to studying, not wanting to talk about anything of substance, not now, not with all these suspicions filling her head.
“Laura, we need to discuss what happened Friday night,” Celia said.
Wouldn’t you know…now she wants to talk.
“I don’t know what there is to talk about. Bart Keller was drunk and made a fool of himself. I am sorry he frightened you.” What she wanted to add was that maybe Ned would be more considerate about escorting Celia all the way to the train station in the future, which would have saved them all some grief. But she didn’t.
“Ned says that you need to be more considerate of your friends, that your behavior is having a negative effect on all of us. You can imagine how uncomfortable it is for him when one of his fraternity brothers asks him why he spends time with someone who says such awful things about the fraternities. He says your reputation as a man-hater was obviously what prompted Mr. Keller to say such hurtful things to you.”
Laura’s face flush with anger. “Since I have only discussed the very questionable past actions of fraternities with the three of you and Ned, I can only assume if his fraternity brothers have gotten a negative opinion of me, it must have been from Ned. Unless you have been gossiping about me as well? As for Bart Keller, why do you assume that I was the one who caused his ungentlemanly behavior Friday night? I can assure you, after you and Kitty left, he was less than complimentary about you both.”
She clenched her fists and took a deep breath. She knew if she repeated what Bart had said, particularly about Kitty, she would hurt her friend deeply. She needed to keep her temper in check.
Once she felt back in control, she said as calmly as she could, “We all have taken abuse from some of the men on campus—the under-the-breath comments, the disruptions when we try to speak in class, the rude behavior in the hallways. I may not have been as willing to hide my disgust with that behavior, as you have, Celia, but if Ned, who knows me, chooses to interpret that as hating all men, then there really isn’t anything I can do about it. However, I would have hoped that he would have defended me against unkind comments, rather than gossiping about me and condoning the rude behavior of someone like Bart Keller.”
Celia snapped back, “Ned said you would blame him.” She then lifted her chin, her cheeks aflame, and said, “Under the circumstances, I have decided to take Kitty’s offer that I come move in with her today. We have ever so much work to do to make sure I am prepared for all my exams. And I am sure that Mrs. Dawson will be very glad to have me gone, so she can start working on her nursery.”
Shocked, Laura looked over at Kitty, who gave her a rather sheepish look, and then became very preoccupied with removing a speck of dust from one of her cuffs.
As Celia walked towards the door to the hallway, Laura said, “I won’t try to persuade you to stay, but please tell me that you understand my point of view. I have done nothing wrong, apart from expressing my honest opinion among people who I thought were my friends. Obviously, those opinions were passed on, so you shouldn’t be surprised that I would feel hurt and betrayed. Yet somehow it seems to be my fault.”
Celia turned and hissed, “Perhaps you need to consider that it is your infatuation with your new friend Miss Sutton and her obsession with her cousin that has caused the loss of your reputation on campus. And if you don’t want to consider the effect it has had on Kitty and me, you should at least consider the negative consequences for poor Mr. Timmons now that he works for your brother. Who do you think your brother will blame if something happens to you? Come, Kitty, let’s go upstairs. Packing shouldn’t take long.”
Celia swept out of the room, Kitty following her.
When the door closed behind them, Laura whipped around and said to Seth, “I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Shy little Celia grew a backbone! I just wish she would be willing to stand up to Ned Goodwin in that fashion. And don’t tell me you agree with her, that somehow I’m to blame for how Bart acted?”
He ran a hand through his hair and frowned, saying, “I don’t know all the particulars with what happened on Friday.”
“It’s very simple. Kitty, Celia, and I were on the way down the path from the clubhouse. They had been out to dinner with Ned and the French instructor, Proctor. The men didn’t bother to stick around the five minutes it would take for me to come out of the clubhouse so they could escort us all the way to the train station. Bart, drunk, met us on the path, not letting us pass. He said some cutting things, Celia began to cry, and I distracted him so Kitty and Celia could slip past him. Then I shoved him and ran down the path. He didn’t follow.”
She had almost said something about Kitty calling Proctor by his first name, but she really didn’t want to get into that subject. She also didn’t want to tell Seth about Bart touching her. She assumed he’d be furious…but what if he weren’t? What if he somehow blamed her?
Seth’s jaw tightened, then he said, “You are quite right to blame Ned for not waiting around to escort you all. But he told Celia that Bart has been going out of his way all this week in your German class to make life unpleasant for you. So why are you saying his behavior wasn’t directed at you?”
“When did Celia tell you that?” Laura had thought that Seth just happened to come in behind Kitty and Celia, but this sounded as if they had talked before they entered the house. She felt all her anger returning. “I can’t imagine them telling you about this on the street. So what did you all do, have a meeting to discuss poor Laura and how she is ruining her life?”
“Miss Blaine invited me to lunch today, and yes, they are worried about you. They don’t understand why you are spending so much time with Miss Sutton. How can they, when you haven’t shared the real purpose of your relationship…to investigate what happened to Miss Atherton?”
“Since it’s pretty clear that everything I say to Celia goes right to Ned and then right on to his fraternity brothers, you should understand why I haven’t told them my real purpose. I said one thing about Willie Caulfield’s death to Ned, and, surprise, surprise, a day later his fraternity brothers—who hadn’t paid the least attention to Caro Sutton before that time—started pushing her in the hallways, knocking books out of her hands, and spilling ink on her.” Laura found she was shaking, fighting back tears.
“I’m right sorry to hear about that,” Seth said quietly. “I hope that Miss Sutton is all right. But you both ought to understand, if you poke the bear, you’re likely to get hurt. And Miss Sutton has no cause to bring you into her personal crusade.”
Laura wanted to slap him, she was so angry. “Seth, how can you be so callous? I know you don’t like conflict, don’t like to get involved. But people are getting hurt, could still get hurt. I can’t just sit by.”
She took a quick turn around the room, and when she got her voice under control, she said, “What Caro and I have experienced is just a taste of what Grace Atherton experienced, month after month. And we now know that another female student suffered from a similar campaign that drove her to a breakdown. She had to leave school for a year. Are we supposed to be grateful she didn’t die, like Grace? I can’t believe you’re saying that any woman who doesn’t kowtow to the fraternity men is fair game for the likes of Bart Keller.”
“No, I’m not saying that!” Seth took a step towards her then stopped. “I’m saying that you need to be careful. Miss Sutton isn’t a permanent student. She can just leave, go back to Nebraska, if her fellow students are making life too uncomfortable. You have three more years at Berkeley. Your own investigations into the divisions on campus over fraternities suggest the faculty are also split over this issue, and some of those faculty members might not take kindly to what you and Miss Sutton are doing. I’m saying you need to figure out how to protect yourself.”
“Or what? You will tell my brother on me? Is that what Celia meant about you working for Nate, that he’s paying you to spy on me?” She angrily wiped away tears, furious with herself for crying.
“No, Laura, what she meant was that I’ve been doing some clerical work for him. I meant to tell you…I’m…”
“You’re the new part-time clerk he hired? Back in January? And neither of you told me?”
Suddenly Seth’s failure to meet her for dinner on Saturdays made sense, but nothing else made sense at all.
She cried out, “Why would you keep that a secret from me? Was I right? He gave you a job and you gave him a weekly report on whether or not his little sister was behaving herself. Oh, Seth, how could you? I thought we were friends?”
Laura ran out of the room and was about to go up the stairs to her room when she realized Celia and Kitty would be there. Grabbing her cloak from the hall stand, she left the house by the front door, wishing the earth would swallow her up.
Twenty minutes later, Seth came in the gate that led from the alley-way behind the O’Farrell Street boarding house and crossed the yard. He saw the maid, Kathleen Hennessey, through the kitchen window, so he wasn’t surprised that when he got to the back door, she had opened it and was standing waiting for him.
“Mr. Timmons, sir, may I help you? I believe Miss Kitty and Miss Celia are still upstairs packing. Is there something wrong?”
Seth wanted to tell her that everything was wrong…but instead, he said, “I was wondering if Miss Dawson had returned to the house. I thought that maybe she was down here with you.”
As Laura stormed out, he had stood, frozen by panic, the room collapsing in on him so that he couldn’t breathe. With enormous effort, he drew in one breath, then another, until he was able finally to move. Then he ran and pulled open the front door and stepped out onto the front porch. Too late.
He didn’t see Laura when he looked up and down O’Farrell, nor did he find her as he frantically searched the nearby streets. If she had taken one of the horse or cable cars, she could be anywhere in town. Finally, he thought about the chance she had doubled back and gone to the kitchen, where he knew she would get a sympathetic hearing as she told them what an ass he’d been.
“I’m sorry, I haven’t seen her, and I was just upstairs. When I heard the bell to the front door ring, I thought the two of you had perhaps gone for a walk. Would you like to wait for her upstairs? Or down here with us? Mrs. O’Rourke and I always enjoy a bit of company.”
Seth looked over at the cook, whose face usually held a kindly smile for him. Today she just looked puzzled. Maybe Laura was here and told them not to tell him? He should respect her wishes in that case, but he couldn’t depart without leaving some sort of apology. And what if she hadn’t returned? She was so upset. Someone should know that something had occurred, be on the lookout for her.
“Miss Kathleen, would it be possible for me to leave a note for Mrs. Dawson?”
“Certainly, sir. I will show you where there is note paper, up in the study. If you will follow me.”
As Seth went back into the study he’d left an hour ago, he tried to think what to write, wondering if this was going to be the last time he’d be invited back to this house, a place he’d secretly started to think of as home.
Chapter 40
Sunday evening, April 10, 1881
San Francisco
“The Oestrus Indictment against Fraternities: Fifth—Fraternities encourage extravagance and waste time.” San Francisco Chronicle, August 23, 1879
Annie looked at Laura’s bed, trying to decide how hard it would be to climb up to sit beside her sister-in-law, who sat under the covers, looking very woebegone. The other option for sitting seemed to be the small wooden desk chair in the corner. In January, they had moved the rocking chair up to the attic to make space for Celia’s small trunk…but that was now gone. She needed to discuss with Laura whether or not to bring the rocker back down or see if it wouldn’t be better to move in a small chest of drawers for the baby’s paraphernalia. She and Nate also needed to discuss if they could afford the loss of income if they asked Mr. Chapman and Mr. Harvey to move out by next fall, so that Laura could move into their old room in order to turn this one into the baby’s nursery. Then Kathleen, who really wanted to take over some of the duties of nursemaid, could move into the room with the baby, and Tilly, who was turning out to an excellent servant, could move into Kathleen’s old room and get the raised wages of being a live-in maid. But this would be another expense. And every time she mentioned expenses, Nate seemed to put in more hours of work.
So many decisions.
None of them, however, needed to be made right this second.
But that wooden chair really looked uncomfortable, and her back was aching this evening.
“Oh, Annie, I’m sorry, you shouldn’t be standing.”
Laura scrambled off the bed and knelt down on the floor, her top half briefly disappearing under the bed frame. She reappeared, saying triumphantly, “Look, here’s a footstool; can you use it to get up on the bed? Or do you want me to get a pillow for the desk chair?”
“Definitely the bed, although you might have to help me get up there.” Dr. Brown was now quite sure her due date would be sometime in May, not June. Annie certainly hoped so.
She stepped up on the stool, turned around, and sat on the edge of the bed so Laura could pick up her legs and swing them under the covers. Annie then scooted back as Laura put two pillows between her back and the headboard. As she leaned back, she sighed with pleasure. She might not bother to return to her own room tonight, since Nate was down in the study working on an opening statement for court tomorrow and might not make it to bed until the wee hours.
Laura went and put another piece of wood on the fire before climbing into the bed beside Annie.
She said, “I really did try to be quiet when I got in. Kathleen said you’d already retired, and I didn’t want to disturb you.”
“As you might imagine, I was listening for you. You got some dinner before you came up?”
Laura nodded mutely, then said, “Did Celia or Kitty say anything?”
“Only that Celia decided to move in with Kitty earlier to make it easier for Kitty to help her prepare for the exams Celia missed by not taking classes during the fall term. I offered to refund her room and board for the rest of the month, but she refused. However, Mr. Timmons sent up a note that said that there had been an ‘unfortunate argument’ and he hoped that I would convey his sincerest apologies. Do you want to tell me what happened?”
Laura picked at the ends of her shawl as she told Annie about the incident with Bart on Friday night and Celia’s response—which was to blame Laura for what happened. She concluded saying, “Of course I lost my temper and said some cutting things of my own. But she made me so mad. I think what hurt the most was that, once again, Seth took her side.”
“Do you think that Celia was right to blame
you?”
“Of course not. You don’t, do you, Annie?”
Annie put her arm around Laura’s shoulder and said, “No, my darling, I don’t think she’s right. I think that Celia is angry about Ned’s behavior and frightened about what it means for their future together, but she has turned that anger and fear against you, rather than against him and his fraternity friends.”
“That seems so unfair.”
“No, it isn’t fair. But remember, you told me that Celia grew up in a home where she was taught not to question men, and I suspect if she ever did so, the consequences weren’t pleasant. And with Ned, what do you think would happen if she told him how she really feels about his behavior…including his coming into the dance drunk…with Bart Keller, I believe?”
“He’d probably end their relationship.”
“Or that is what she fears would happen, which is one of the reasons she probably finds any mention of Miss Atherton and Mr. Caulfield’s relationship, with its parallels to her own, so upsetting.”
Laura looked surprised, then nodded thoughtfully. “Oh, Annie, you’re right. And there I went again, pushing her to stand up to Ned, which is asking her to do something she is deathly afraid will destroy her future happiness.”
Laura leaned over and hugged her knees, hiding her face. Her voice muffled, she said, “I don’t seem to be very good at keeping friends, do I?”
Annie, thinking that they might be getting to the core of why Laura was so upset, said, “What makes you say that?”
“Well, first there was Hattie. And last fall I failed Grace Atherton. She really needed a friend, and I didn’t even notice the terrible time she was having. Then I thought Celia and I would become closer once she moved in here. But instead, she and Kitty have become fast friends, while I may have lost them both.”
“Why do you see Celia and Kitty’s friendship as your failure?”
Scholarly Pursuits Page 30
