by Golden Angel
Time to get his head out of his ass before she thought too hard about his strange behavior.
"Sorry, sweetheart," he said, veering her away from the fountain to keep walking. This was not the time or the place to propose. He just couldn't do it, no matter that he'd planned it that way. The nervous energy that had made him distracted all night skittered away. "I'm just tired and my head's kind of all over the place right now."
The suspicious look she shot him said that she wasn't entirely convinced by his lie, but she didn't argue.
"So what's next?" she asked, wrapping her arm around his waist to help balance herself as they walked.
"How about a movie?"
******
Liam was being weird.
While she appreciated nice dates, if he was going to act oddly whenever they went on one, Hilary would really rather just stay in. She was pretty sure that he was barely even paying attention to the movie - and considering that he'd let her choose the latest chick flick without even a token protest, she wasn't sure he'd been paying attention for a while. Picking up a handful of popcorn, she watched him out of the corner of her eye.
It kind of looked like he was arguing with himself. His fierce expression definitely didn't reflect what was going on on-screen. Had something happened that he hadn't told her about? Sometimes, if he got frustrated with something, he would let it build up until he absolutely had to vent about it. She couldn't think of anything he'd seemed upset about though.
So far, everything tonight had been perfect and romantic. Was he worried that there was something wrong between the two of them? This was the second big date he'd taken her on in one month. Hilary hoped he wasn't silly enough to think that these kind of dates were something that she needed. They were enjoyable, but she'd have been just as happy having a romantic dinner at home and then watching a movie together.
With the added bonus of the bedroom being much closer.
Once the movie let out, she practically dragged him back to the car, even though he suggested getting ice cream. Ice cream was all well and good, but she wanted to know what was wrong. Definitely not a conversation he'd be willing to have in public and, depending on what the problem was, she might feel the same way.
"So what did you think of the movie?" she asked, once they were in the car.
"It was okay. Not really my thing." The charming little grin he gave her made everything seem almost back to normal. Whatever tension had been gripping him for most of the night was gone again.
"Are you okay? You seem uncomfortable every time we go out." Hilary reached out to put her hand on his thigh, rubbing her fingers slightly in a soothing kind of way. "We don't have to go out a lot, you know. Especially not if it makes you uncomfortable."
"Going out doesn't make me uncomfortable," he said, giving her a look of confusion that seemed entirely genuine. Which only confused Hilary even more. Then what was with his constant anxiety?
"Well then why are you acting so weird when we do?"
"How am I acting weird?"
Now he sounded defensive and Hilary was starting to feel frustrated. She'd been trying to make things better, not worse. It made her feel all tight inside her chest, as if they were about to argue, and that really wasn't how she wanted to end the night, but at the same time she was mad that it seemed like he was hiding things from her. "You just seem really tense. I don't know. Never mind, maybe I'm imagining things."
Starting to draw her hand back from his lap, she sagged in relief when he reached down and caught it, covering her hand with his own. The hard expression on his face had melted away, into something more apologetic.
"I'm sorry, you're right. I have been tense lately."
Squeezing his thigh, Hilary leaned closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder. She could actually feel some of the tension leaking away from her and that made her feel better. So did his acknowledgment that she wasn't just going crazy in her head. Lately it felt like she was constantly reading too much into things and it was making her second-guess herself like crazy. Pressing her head against his shoulder, she felt re-connected to him.
"Any particular reason? Is there anything that I can do?"
"Just keep being your wonderful self." Stopping the car for a red light, Liam kissed the top of her head, shrugging his shoulder gently as if trying to give her a hug with it. Hilary sighed. Apparently he didn't want to tell her why. Whatever it was, it must not be too bad.
Maybe he really was uncomfortable out on these dates and just didn't want to admit it. That sounded suspiciously like something a guy would do.
******
"What the hell, Liam?"
Damn. He hadn't known Jessica could screech like that. Wincing, he held the phone away from his ear in case she did it again. No need to ask what she was upset about.
"I know, I know, I'm doing it soon."
"This shouldn't be like pulling teeth. You want to ask her, you got the ring, you got her dad's blessing, so what's the problem? Do you have any idea how hard it is for me to not tell anyone that I know you have the ring? To not be excited for my best friend? Because I can't be, because no one else knows what's going on?!"
"I'm sorry. I was going to do it last night, I really was but..."
"But, what?"
Ouch. Poor Justin and Chris. No wonder they did their best not to piss her off, she could probably shatter ear drums if she wanted to.
"It just wasn't right," he muttered.
Jessica groaned. "Oh my god, it's picking out a ring all over again. Liam, seriously, however you ask her, she'll love it."
"I came up with a new idea. It's better."
"Yeah? Do you want me to approve the idea too?" The question could have sounded sarcastic and he was grateful that it didn't; Jessica just seemed genuinely relieved and curious about what he was going to do.
"No, I got this." This time. He felt much more confident. He'd learned from his mistake.
"Good." Jessica made an exasperated sound. "Because I am sick to death of waiting! Plus, you're starting to worry her."
"Yeah I know." He'd definitely realized that last night, and he couldn't blame her. The entire date had been uncomfortable and there had been no way for him to hide that from her. At least the night had ended well, with lots of cuddling on the couch before he'd taken her back to the bedroom. He'd made exquisitely slow, tender love to her, completely vanilla, and entirely satisfying. Sometimes they liked to keep it simple. Just for variety. "Thank you for keeping it a secret."
"No problem." She laughed. "I'm enjoying myself immensely, since Justin and Chris still don't realize that you've told me. They've added your upcoming proposal to the list of things they'd hiding from me."
"Give them a break, Jess," he said, feeling a certain sympathy for his beleaguered friends. "They're worried about the fact that you've been with them longer than I've been with Hilary and how you'll feel once I propose."
"Oh, I've decided not to be mad," she said airily. "It's more fun to be entertained. Especially when I bring it up to them and they flounder around trying to be smooth and pretend like they don’t know anything."
"You know that's going to come back and bite you in the ass."
"Well it's probably going to get something done to my ass, but I'm okay with that. At least I get to make them suffer a little bit first."
Laughing, Liam said goodbye and hung up the phone. He did feel bad. It wasn't just Jessica who was disappointed that he was taking so long to propose, he'd had to call Hilary's dad and let him know that he'd chickened out too. Plus his parents. Dammit. But he really did have a much better idea for this weekend and he was really looking forward to it.
He was just lucky the timing was so perfect.
******
Bodies were sprawled out, in various limp positions, across the mats. Liam groaned as he forced himself to stretch, even though his friends had already given up on the pursuit. Today he'd pushed them all particularly hard, working out his own frustrations over his
unsuccessful proposal and the upcoming, hopefully successful, one this weekend. Even though he knew he now had the perfect plan, he was still stressed out.
So when Jared, Rick and Andrew had come in for their Wednesday workout, Liam had run all of them ragged. Considering that he'd put in a full day of classes before they'd even gotten there, he was feeling unusually limp now.
The guys were trying to get some insights into what was going on with Rick and Maria, since they hadn't been seen at Stronghold in a while. Maria was a total newbie to the scene, and Rick had fumbled her first visit to the kink club pretty badly by not telling her what she was walking into. Even then, she'd gotten the guts to ask for an Introduction Scene, but apparently Rick hadn't handled the aftermath of that very well either.
From what Hilary had said, Maria had thought Rick had rejected her and he thought she'd rejected him. Since then, they hadn't been back to the club.
"She's a little apprehensive," Rick said with a shrug, working out the kinks in his neck as he rolled his head back and forth, responding to Andrew's query about their relationship. "So we're taking things slow."
"Good idea," Liam said, cutting Andrew off from replying. When it came to newbies, Andrew wasn't always entirely welcoming, although Hilary had won him over pretty quickly. He was definitely still holding himself aloof from Maria. "You don't want to overwhelm her."
Unfortunately, throwing out that reminder didn't do anything to slow Andrew's opinion. "I liked her when I met her, but don't let her twist you around or lead you on if she's not sure she's actually into this lifestyle. All you'll end up with is a bunch of regrets and doubts," Andrew said, his voice dark. He pushed himself up to a standing position, the tension in his shoulders making the muscles bunch. "No woman is worth that. I'm gonna hit the showers."
"Don't mind him," Liam said, keeping his voice low even though Andrew had already stalked out of the room. "He's just a wee bit biased."
The half-angry look on Rick's face subsided as the other man sighed. He'd immediately assumed a kind of defensive position, but there was no point to arguing with Andrew on this matter. Some days he seemed to be doing better about letting go of the issues of his past, with his ex, other days he relapsed and was like this. It didn't have anything to do with Maria, not really, so there was no point in Rick trying to get into it with Andrew about it.
"Besides," Jared said, still lying on his back and looking happily relaxed, "newbies work out for some of us." He twisted his head around to grin at Liam. It was always nice to see the big man so chilled out; his on-again, off-again vulture of a girlfriend was out of town, and that always made him more light-hearted. Sometimes, Liam wondered if Jared wished he could meet a newbie. He and Marissa had been together for so long, and they'd learned about the scene together while they were already in a relationship. Marissa was definitely not the right kind of submissive for him - if she was submissive at all - and Jared wasn't getting what he needed out of the relationship even when she was around.
"Pretty darn well, too," he said in response to Jared, grinning. Well, he'd wanted to tell his friends about his plans for the weekend, and this seemed like as good a time as any. Give Rick a little bit of hope for his relationship with Maria, maybe remind Jared that he didn't have to stay with Marissa to try and find happiness. "I'm ah... well, I meant to tell you guys when Andrew was still in here, but um... This weekend I'm going to ask Hilary to marry me."
Rick let out a whoop of joy, doing a kind of sitting leap to land on Liam, crushing him with his sweaty, stinking body. A second later, before Liam could push him off, an even heavier weight crashed into both of them as Jared piled on, both of them congratulating him at once. Liam couldn't focus on what they were saying, he was too busy trying to breathe with their combined weights and rank body odor pressing down on him.
"Get off me!" he gasped out, shoving for all he was worth. "You're both sweaty and gross!" Not the most articulate or mature response, but it was true. They laughed as they rolled away from him, and Liam couldn't help but grin stupidly. Neither of them were looking tired now, they were both running high on adrenaline and happiness for him. That kind of response, that happiness, was what made his friends so damn fantastic.
"So you think she’ll say yes?"
Fantastic, right up until they said something like that.
"Fuck you." Liam flipped up his middle finger at Rick, and then a second one to Jared who was laughing his ass off. "Come on, let's go shower."
"And then let's go celebrate!"
Rick ran into the locker room ahead of them, hooting and calling out to Andrew. A second later, the big naked man, dripping water, came barreling out of the bathroom with his arms spread wide to hug Liam. So Liam did the only sensible thing he could do: he took off down the hall running.
“Come here fucker! I’m gonna hug you!”
Laughing maniacally, Andrew caught up with Liam just as he reached the door to the outside, plastering his big, wet, naked body against him. Liam couldn’t help laughing too as Andrew picked him up and spun him around. Good to know Andrew was happy for him, considering how much time the other man spent flirting with Liam’s soon-to-be fiancé.
One short drive to Rick's, a couple of six packs later, a phone call to Adam and Patrick to let them know that he was proposing to Hilary that weekend, and Liam was well on his way to getting drunk. Which made it a lot easier to admit to them that he'd chickened out the weekend before.
"You guys have talked about it though, right?" Jared asked, now looking kind of worried. "I mean, it's not just going to come out of the blue."
"Well, I'm hoping to surprise her," he replied, a grin spreading across his face as he thought about his plans for the upcoming weekend. If everything went well, he'd be surprising her with more than just the proposal. "But yeah, we've talked about getting married. Talked through the important things like how many kids we'd like, whether or not to go to church, how we'd want to do our finances. All that kind of stuff."
Granted, when they'd done so, it had been in vague terms, and they'd never said "When we're married" or "When we have kids," but they'd both known that's what they'd really been discussing. That kind of thing was important. Although Liam could compromise on a lot of things, he'd wanted to know how Hilary felt about them before he proposed. A lot of things - like having kids and how they were going to be raised or how finances were going to be handles - weren't subjects that should be ignored until after the wedding. He didn't intend to spend his first year of marriage arguing because he'd made assumptions about such important life choices.
******
When she got the text from Liam that he was going over to hang out at Rick's for the rest of the evening, Hilary was only a little disappointed. After all, she was having a really good time with Olivia and Lexie. Unfortunately Jessica hadn't been able to join them, but that was okay. Even though Jessica had been her anchor and best friend for a lot of years, all the Stronghold gang was starting to feel like family.
Angel had even coined the term "sister-friend" for the girls, because they were more like sisters than friends even if they weren't related by blood. Being an only child, Hilary had always wanted a bunch of siblings, and now she had them. Olivia and Angel were like big sisters, Lexie was the little sister, and Jessica was like her twin. She didn't know where Maria would fit in, but she was sure that she would eventually. They'd all really liked her.
The only one who was never going to fit in was Marissa. She was like the evil step-sister that they all had to be nice to. Well, except for Olivia, she could get away with being outright mean, but she was the only one. Not that Hilary really wanted to be mean to anyone, but if she was ever going to be, Marissa would be a good choice.
"Liam's going over to Rick's for a bit," she announced, settling back down on the couch with Olivia and Lexie. "Boy time."
"Good, cuz I'm not ready to give up girl time, yet," Lexie said, impishly. "I don't get nearly enough anymore, I swear, sometimes I think Patrick's
trying to make me quit at the club."
"Well, it's not like you really need the money anymore, is it?" Hilary asked, knowing that Lexie had her day job as well.
"Yeah, but if I quit then I feel like he'll just see it as a sign that he's won." Lexie scowled.
"That's true," Olivia said, with an indelicate snort. "I'd be able to get you into the Dungeon, but, like you've said before, that won't send the message that you're serious about the scene. They won’t think anything of it as long as you’re with me."
"I'm meeting Doms at the front desk, just so far none brave enough to take on the Sentinels." Sighing, Lexie swept her hands over her thighs, something she often did when she was frustrated, as if she could brush all the annoyances off of her lap and out of her life.
"I'm a little confused," Hilary said. The whole dynamic between Lexie and Patrick was something that she just didn't really get. She could see where both of them were coming from, but she didn't really understand what drove their actions. "Liam told me that Patrick wants almost a Master-slave relationship, not quite 24/7, but definitely not just inside the bedroom. You don't really act like a slave, you're flirting with other Doms... but I thought you liked Patrick."
"Ah, but Patrick doesn't want the kind of Master-slave relationship you're thinking of," Olivia said, before Lexie could respond. Lexie just nodded in agreement, but she also tilted her head slightly, listening to what Olivia had to say, as if adding the information to the already extensive files she had on Patrick inside her head. "He likes the idea of being in control all the time, but that doesn't mean he wants a submissive that will automatically do everything he says."
"All of his previous girlfriends would be described as 'brats' in the scene," Lexie put in. "Which is good, because I was never the ‘suffer in silence’ type."
"You know how you and Liam have certain rules for in the club or in a scene, that don't apply during the rest of the day?" Olivia asked, and Hilary nodded. "Patrick wants those rules to apply all of the time. But he'd get bored if his submissive always followed them. Personally, I think he just wants to be able to punish her anytime, anywhere. Things with his previous submissives always ended when he got bored. Not that he’s had that many of them."
