by Joanna Neil
'Are these your nephews?' she asked.
He nodded. 'That's right, for my sins. I'm expecting Claire to come and take them off my hands at any moment, but you know how it is with my sister. Things never seem to go according to plan.'
'Yes, I remember. She was always getting into scrapes of one kind or another.' Claire was ditzy, a lively, extrovert sort of person, hardly ever fazed by anything. She frowned, collecting herself. 'Can I have a word?'
'Sure.'
'It's about Mrs Walker. I think she has a perforated ulcer and the beginnings of peritonitis. I've arranged for the surgeon to come and look at her.'
'That's good. Did you do a CT scan?'
'She's going for that now. I've been talking to her and it looks as though there's a history of ulceration. Lately she's been going through a lot of stress, and I think the accident was the last straw.'
'You did well to pick up on the symptoms. Did you have some idea that it might be ulcers that were causing the trouble?'
She nodded. 'I remember how Nick was when the business folded. He lost a lot of money and things were really bad, and the stress started to get to him. He was in pain and he lost weight, and in the end he started to be sick a lot. He didn't really understand why things had gone wrong, and he wasn't sure how to handle it.'
Taylor looked at her steadily. 'Do you blame me for that?'
Allison moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue. 'Yes, I think I do, in part. You pulled the rug out from under his feet and added to his stress at a time when things were going downhill. Having to find new premises at short notice came as a real jolt to him. He had expected you to renew the lease, and when you didn't, he was suddenly catapulted into a whole new set-up. Premises weren't easy to find, and they were all far more expensive than he could afford. He started to lose orders because he couldn't fulfil his obligations to customers.'
'I don't believe I was entirely to blame for that. He was losing custom before I pulled the lease.'
'Maybe. At any rate, that's all in the past, and it's over now.' She didn't want to argue with him. After all, it had been his property to do with as he'd pleased, and it had been unfortunate that her brother and Ben had ended up as collateral damage. His actions had never really made sense to her. They hadn't fitted with her image of him, even less so now that he was helping Rhea.
He looked down at his young nephew. 'I think that's enough bandaging for now, Adam,' he murmured. 'I have to go and see to my patients.'
The boy took no notice at all and went on with the bandaging, starting on Taylor's other leg and binding that to the chair, too.
'Josh, come down from there.' Taylor frowned as the older boy climbed up onto the work surface and tried to explore the contents of the wall cabinet. Neither boy responded.
'I'm waiting,' he said, his tone sharp, so that this time both boys turned to look at him. 'Josh, get down from there this minute.' He turned towards Adam. 'As for you, young man, that will be quite enough first aid for now.' He took a pair of scissors from his pocket and cut through the bonds. 'Both of you, come over here and sit down at the table.'
He glowered at them when neither boy made a move. 'I'm not going to repeat myself.'
There must have been something in his manner that finally got through to them, because both boys suddenly decided it would be wise to do as they were told and slid into the seats. They waited while he freed himself from the coils of bandage.
He hunted in a drawer and then pushed a sheet of paper and pencils in front of each of them. 'Draw,' he said. 'Don't move from the spot until your mother comes back.'
Allison sent him a brief glance. 'Why is Claire here in the hospital?' she asked. 'Is she seeing a doctor?' She was worried for him all at once. He and his sister had always been close, despite their differences in temperament. 'Is she ill?'
He shook his head. 'That's just the point. Claire is never ill, but just lately she's been feeling nauseous and under the weather. She said she'd been throwing up some mornings, so she decided she wanted to come and have a word with a friend who works here.'
'Who is she seeing?'
'Mary, from upstairs. You know, the obs-gynae doctor? They're good friends.' He stopped suddenly, as though he had just realised what he had said, and his eyes widened.
His expression was so stunned that Allison couldn't help herself. She started to chuckle. 'Did it not dawn on you before this?'
He groaned. 'That's it, isn't it?' He lowered his voice. 'She must be pregnant. Why didn't I think of it?'
'Because you're her brother?'
.'I suppose so.' He grimaced. 'She must be mad. What can have possessed her? You'd have thought she had enough on her hands with those two.'
'She may not have planned it,' Allison ventured. 'Accidents happen...even with the best of precautions.' She sent him a cautious look.
He stared at her. 'Is that what happened with you?' He lowered his voice so that the boys would not hear what he was saying. 'Ever since I discovered that you have a child, I haven't been able to get my head around it. You and I were as close as it's possible to be, and even though it was just the once that we came together, we were careful. You had just qualified as a doctor, and you had your whole career ahead of you, and I didn't want to take the chance of ruining any of that.'
He shook his head as though it was all beyond his understanding. 'And yet you must have changed your whole view of life just a short time afterwards. Why else would you take the risk of becoming pregnant? Was it that you fell for someone, or maybe you just decided that motherhood was what you wanted after all? Did something go wrong?'
She gave a faint, ironic smile. 'You could say that. Although, as it turns out, I've discovered that Connor is the most precious thing in my life, so I really don't have any regrets on that score.'
Taylor was silent for a moment, but then he placed his hands on her upper arms, drawing her towards him. His hold on her was gentle but firm, as though he would keep her near him and protect her from harm. 'It must have been hard for you, going through all that alone. I don't understand why you didn't tell Connor about his father, and I've been thinking it through. It couldn't have been Ben, could it? He's a normal, decent sort of man, and I don't see how you would have stayed close to him all this time and not become a family unit.'
'Does it matter?' she said. 'It was all a long time ago, and I made a mistake. I wasn't going to see Connor's father again and I didn't want to compound that mistake by involving anyone else in my problems.'
He frowned, looking into her eyes, and just then the door to the rest room opened and his sister walked in.
Taylor let go of Allison and she was very still for a moment or two, trying to absorb the fact that he was no longer holding her close, and doing her best to calm the hammering of her heart. She didn't know why he had this effect on her, but whenever he was near he made her want what she couldn't have.
'Hi,' Claire said. 'I'm back. You wouldn't believe the number of people who are still waiting to be seen in the clinic upstairs.' Her black hair was tousled, a mass of cloudy curls that tumbled over her shoulders and rippled as she advanced into the room. Her gaze went to the table where the boys were sitting.
'Has everything been all right while I've been gone?' Claire looked at her sons. 'You're both suspiciously quiet. Have you been behaving yourselves?'
The boys made noncommittal sounds, making out that they were engrossed in their drawing. She accepted that at face value and turned to look at Allison. 'Hello, Allie,' she said. 'It's been ages since we've seen each other, hasn't it? Has my brother been looking after you? I couldn't believe it when he said you were working together.'
Allison tried on a smile. 'It's a funny old world, isn't it? It's good to see you again, Claire.'
The moment with Taylor was lost for ever by the intrusion, and she didn't know whether she was sad about that or relieved.
CHAPTER SEVEN
'Has Claire gone home already?' Allison asked, stopping by the
treatment bay where Taylor was busy checking a patient's ECG results.
Seeing his long, lean figure made her heart slip into an erratic rhythm all over again, and it unnerved her that he should have this effect on her. She was still remembering the thrill of having him hold her close and more than anything she wanted to know what it was that he felt for her. He seemed to care for her, and even want her, but was there anything more than that? Her own feelings were thoroughly mixed up. Was this love that she felt for him, this feeling of wanting to be close to him all the time?
He looked up from the ECG trace. 'Yes, she left here a few minutes ago. Why, did you want to speak to her?'
'No, it's just that I somehow expected her to stay around for a bit longer. I haven't seen her in ages and I thought we might have time to chat, seeing that I'm off duty now.'
Taylor glanced at the nurse who was assisting and said, 'The patient's heart rate is way too fast, but there's no abnormal rhythm, so we'll try her on a beta blocker to see if that will slow things down a bit. I'll prepare an injection first of all and see how that works out, and then maybe, if all's well, we'll follow up with tablets.'
He came to stand by the curtained entrance of the treatment room and glanced at Allison.
'I'm sure Claire would have stayed if she could, but she said she had to get back to make sure that her dog was all right. Apparently he's been cooped up for most of the day.'
'No problem. Perhaps I'll catch up with her some other time.' She sent him a quick look. 'Shouldn't you have been off duty some time ago? You were here before I was this morning.'
He nodded. 'There are just a few things I need to check up on before I do that.'
It didn't surprise her that he wasn't in any hurry to leave. He put in long hours at the hospital, and even when he wasn't with patients, he was often busy sorting out changes that would, in the long run, make a significant difference to the general efficiency of the department.
'This place is like your second home, isn't it? Are you doing all this because you want to make your mark? You were always keen to get on, weren't you? But I would have thought now that you're a consultant you would be able to relax a little. Don't you ever feel the need to let go?'
He looked startled. 'Why would I? This is what I love to do, and I can't imagine what it would be like to be at work from nine to five each day. Besides, I have to think about what I want to do when this position closes. Where do I want to go from here?' He shrugged. 'I've been offered a place back in Hampshire, but it calls for extra administrative skills and I'm working all the while to achieve them. As it is, I'm lucky that I'm a free agent, and I don't ever have to worry about getting home on time.'
So he was definitely going to leave, eventually. The knowledge brought her spirits down with a sickening lurch. 'Doesn't that make you feel isolated sometimes? Don't you ever wonder what it would be like to be similar to your sister and have someone to go home to each day—a wife and family of your own, maybe? There must have been odd times when you've given it some thought.'
He was silent for a moment, his expression becoming serious. 'Maybe.' Taylor looked at her, his gaze shifting over her features, his eyes darkening to an intense shade of grey, so that she began to wonder if he might have taken exception to her question in some way.
But then he seemed to shrug off his sober mood, adding, 'But they certainly were odd times, when I think perhaps I might have suffered a mental lapse. It isn't going to happen.' He gave her a faint smile. 'Anyway, I only have to be with Claire and her brood for an hour or so, and I find myself longing for the peace and quiet of my apartment. Perhaps I'm not cut out for family life.'
She hadn't really expected any other kind of answer from him, had she? She might have hoped that he would express some need for closeness, but he wasn't about to declare that he had any deep feelings for her, was he? Their precious moments of togetherness belonged firmly in the past, a warm nugget of comfort tucked away deep inside her.
For her own part, she couldn't imagine dedicating her life simply to work, and perhaps he caught something of what she was thinking because he sent her an oddly searching look and commented, 'I expect you're only too glad to be able to go home and spend time with Connor.'
'Yes, that's true.'
He smiled. On a whim, he put out a hand and ran a finger lightly through the golden strands of her hair, tucking a stray curl behind her ear. 'I can see how strong the bond is between the two of you. He's lucky to have you,' he murmured. 'You seem to have things just about right.'
Allison nodded. 'Do I? I know that he can be a handful at times, but I love him dearly, and I do look forward to being with him. He brightens up my life.'
The thought popped into her mind that she would like to spend time with Taylor, too, but she squashed that idea as soon as it came into being. What would be the point in hoping for that? There was no room for her in his life. He was dedicated to his job. It was everything to him, and the fact that he was only there to cover for the previous consultant seemed to make no difference to his approach to the work in hand. He was full of ideas as to how things could be improved.
'Perhaps I'll see you later, just as soon as I've finished work,' he said. 'I shouldn't be too much longer. I have to check up on my patient's medication, and make sure that it's slowing the heart rate down adequately, but once I'm sure that I can safely hand over to the registrar I'll be able to leave. I told Rhea that I would bring her a folder of details about the house, so that she could glance through them.'
'Did you? Yes, later, then.'
She dawdled although it was time for her to go home from work. Rhea would probably still be at her house, collecting the rest of her things, and there was really no need for her to rush about. There was no meal to organise, because they had planned on having a light supper, a salad, maybe, something that wouldn't take too much preparation.
The day was warm, and she felt restless for fresh air after the antiseptic smell of the hospital, so she collected her things together and decided to go for a walk.
She ended up in Regent's Park, where she sat for a while and watched waterfowl meander gracefully across the lake. Mother ducks gathered their broods about them, going off in search of food, and their offspring followed, darting here and there across the water.
Allison wondered what it would be like to be as serene and untroubled by everyday events as they were. Life seemed to be so simple for them, and yet for her it was full of pitfalls. Only that morning Connor had asked her, 'Do I have a daddy?' And she hadn't known how to answer him.
'Yes, you do,' she had said, after a moment of reflection, 'but he doesn't live with us.'
'Why not?'
'Because sometimes daddies live somewhere else.'
That had seemed to satisfy him for the time being, but she knew that sooner or later he would start to ask more questions. It was something she was going to have to deal with.
By now the sun was low in the sky, casting its rays over the smooth surface of the water, and she decided that it was time to go. Rhea and Connor should be arriving home any time now, and she wanted to be there to greet them. She set off for the tube station and thought about her plans for the evening.
Taylor had said he would come over, and she realised that she was looking forward to seeing him outside work. Maybe she would even be able at last to find the right words to tell him that Connor was his son. She frowned. How would he react to that?
A while later, she pushed open the front door of her house and went into the hallway, looking to see if Connor was back already.
The place was strangely silent, though, and straight away she had the feeling that something was wrong. 'Rhea... Connor,' she called out. 'Where are you?'
A vase lay on its side on the hall table, and perhaps it was just that it had been blown over by a cool breeze that was wafting along the narrow corridor. That probably simply meant that someone had forgotten to close a window somewhere in the house.
She walked into the l
iving room and came to a sudden halt in the doorway. Nothing was as it should be. An armchair was tipped over on its back on the other side of the room, as though someone had pushed it hard from behind, until it had crashed against the wall and then toppled over. Drawers had been ripped out from the bureau and had been tossed onto the floor, so that the contents had spilled out over the rug.
Alarmed by what she was seeing, Allison went into the kitchen and discovered that it was the same in there. Anything that had once been set out tidily on the work surfaces was now strewn across the tiled floor. Crockery was smashed, even the tea service that her mother had given to her, and Connor's favourite mug, the one with the teddy-bear picture, was in bits.
Her throat seemed to swell, causing an aching sensation that made it hard to swallow. She knelt down and started to carefully pick up the fragments, one by one, cherishing each small piece, remembering how he would curl his fingers around the mug and look at her from over the top of it with smiling, bright eyes. Her hands were shaking. How could she let him come home to find this devastation?
Who could have done this? Tears stung her eyelids, but she dashed them away with the back of her hand and stared about her. Whoever it had been must have come in through the window. The glass was shattered, covering the sink unit. That would account for the cool air that was even now wafting through the house.
'Allison?' Taylor's voice sounded far away. 'You left the front door open, so I came in. What's happened here?'
She turned to look up at him. Vaguely, she registered that he had changed out of his work clothes into casual chinos and a mid-blue shirt, but she had no idea what he was doing there right now. Then she guessed that time must have been moving on faster than she'd realised, and wondered how long it was she had been staring at the ruins of her home.
'I don't know.' Her voice was barely more than a whisper.
His gaze shifted over her, his eyes narrowing, and she looked down and discovered that she was still holding on to what was left of the mug. She stared down at her fingers and saw that blood was dripping from her palm onto the floor.
