“Yes.”
“Why are you even here?” Swindle asks.
“To save my city.”
He looks to the horse he’s petting. “If you try to save the city as a goddess, you will lose.”
“Listen to me, orc,” I say, poking at his chest.“I am the goddess of this city. You will not tell me what I can do.”
He stops petting the horse and with his voice even, replies, “I speak the truth.”
I must remember why I’m talking to him. All I want to do is save my city.
Before I can speak, he asks, “Do you want to save these people?”
“Yes!”
“Then understand who you are. Your people come from another world. You are like the Jinn of the Sea of Sand, but more powerful than they. Your parents came from a place in the night sky, a blue whirl of storms.”
“Blasphemy! We are the rightful gods. Where has your God run off to?” My stomach turns bitter and painful. Immediately, I bend over and fall to my knees.
Swindle walks away. As he opens the door, I see Tuk standing at the threshold. He must have been listening at the door.
“Find me when you are really willing to talk.” The orc steps out of the stable.
“Get back here!” I yell.
“No,” the orc says, without a hint of emotion. He shuts the door and leaves.
A Lesser God
As Swindle walks away, I try to curse him, but I am too weak. I’m down on all fours. The sickness has drained my body. Saving this city is a mistake. This pain is not worth it.
The little goblin walks over to me, his eyes narrowing as he rubs his chin. “What happened to you?”
"I'm sick, you fool."
“Why did Swindle leave you?” Tuk asks.
He apparently didn’t hear the conversation. I try to stand. “He’s an atheist fool.”
Tuk shrugs like that doesn’t matter, then sits two strides from me. “The gods don’t care about us.”
Anger at the idiot flares inside me. But I think before I act. The gods really don’t care. My parents are the patriarch and matriarch of the gods, and they won’t lift a finger—all because of Anu and the atheist. I can’t just hate every mortal I come across. Besides, this goblin likely lacks friends beyond Chelsea, so I might use him as an ally. “You are right gob—Tuk. Why do you hate the gods?"
Tuk looks to the ground. “The heroes of the city wiped out my entire tribe. People say they are blessed by the gods.”
“Erich killed your whole family?” I sit on the earthen floor.
“Yes.”
“Does Erich know you’re—”
Tuk shakes his head. “We all look alike to most humans. I even told him who I am, but he doesn’t believe me.”
We don’t speak for a second.
Tuk asks, “Are you the princess?”
"No, I’m the goddess Ningal," I say, leaning over as my empty stomach heaves.
One of Tuk’s eyebrows raises up. “Goddesses don’t vomit.”
Damn this creature and its obvious observations. “Your atheist friend is more powerful than he knows or looks. Help me up, goblin, and prove your worth to me."
“Yes, your holiness,” says the goblin.
He could help me without the sarcasm, but his obedience is appreciated.
I pull the roll the boy had given me earlier from my pocket. My stomach churns like a witch's cauldron, but I’m going to need energy if I’m going to kill Swindle.
Killing Swindle
Not wanting to share the horrid process of eating with anyone, I hide in a closet filled with old clothes and cracked leather boots. I stick the roll in my mouth and mash it with my teeth. Crumbs fall from my mouth, but most of it stays in and becomes wet. I find the taste . . . enjoyable.
“Why are you eating in a closet, Goddess of Reeds?” the goblin asks with heavy sarcasm. My name, Ningal, actually means Goddess of Reeds.
“Since when did goblins get an education?” I say, continuing to eat.
“Chief’s son.”
I nod. The son of a chief would be expected to have knowledge of the gods. With a final bite, I finish the roll and exit the closet. Swindle may not know the power he wields, but the orc humiliated me with the sickness all the same. “Come, goblin.”
The goblin rolls his eyes and follows.
I find Erich in the commons room, sharpening his sword on his lap, alone. Picking my words with care, I plot my chance to murder Swindle. “Erich, I am a priest of Ningal, and I need your help. As you know, Swindle is an atheist.”
Erich remains seated, barely looking up from his sword. “Yes.”
“I want you to kill him.”
“No,” he says, standing.
“Why not?”
“I would normally help you, but the ghouls will likely kill him. And—”
“And?”
The fighter sighs. “I just don’t care. The gods don’t care about us.” Erich doesn’t even look at me. He sheathes his sword and walks towards a door.
“But he cursed me!” I scream.
“Why?” he asks as he stops, but his voice is thick with indifference.
Rage wells up. “Does it matter?”
He sighs again. “No.”
For a split second I believe he will help me, but instead, he opens the door and is gone. So, apparently, it doesn’t matter why he cursed me. Why should he care?
That’s it. I may as well kill Swindle myself.
I hear laughing. It comes from everywhere.
“Is little baby Ningal angry?”
I recognize the menacing, sarcastic voice at once. It is that of Anu.
Death with Many Offers
In the blink of an eye, the room empties of furniture. Color drains from my sight, and the world becomes only black and white. Anu’s laughter fills the pale room. The black cracks in the wooden boards stand out against the pale walls and floor. I look for Tuk and find he has also vanished.
“Look at what you’ve done. You are hated and cursed. Leave now, little one.”
“That’s actually a good idea,” I say, “but I’ll kill Swindle first.”
“You can’t even avenge yourself of the slight Swindle did to you.” His voice is closer, like he’s in the room now, but I still can’t see him.
Actually, I’m not sure that it’s Swindle who cursed me. I doubt he knows how to curse anything. “I’m getting around to it.”
“Haha. I bet you are. I’ll tell you what. I’ll give you the power to kill him, and then you join me.”
“No, thanks.” The room has emptied and the colors of the walls have paled. The Inn is quiet, which leads me to think that Anu has taken me via a psychic connection, or as a human might call, a vision.
I continue, “Anu, you have no leverage.” I am standing while holding my stomach. It still hurts a bit. “If you kill me you, will go from banished to hunted. If I take your offer, I will lose my status with my family and other gods, becoming an illegal god myself. That’s not a good deal at all.”
“Haha. I didn't think you brave enough to take my offer. That’s fine. Perhaps I should show my generosity.” The last word sounds like ooze flowing from his mouth.
Silence holds between us for a dozen seconds. I don’t like the idea of his generosity. My stomach feels weird, like the contents are bubbling. This is why mortals react badly to fear; their bodies are an alarm system. I control my voice to sound even. “Go on.”
“Well, it’s just that you don’t want to know.”
"Be gone, Anu.”
“The secret I have—it will hurt you.”
“Anu, it’s okay that you don’t have anything to share. Go home—that is, if you have one.”
I felt Anu’s presence turn dark. “Hold your tongue, little girl. For, it is your own mother who is to blame for the loss of your city. She stopped her visits to me!”
“What?” I say, even while I understand. Damn you, Mom.
“You might not be Marduk’s daughter, but m
ine!”
“No!” I clench my fist. For gods, we are as duplicitous as the worst mortal worms. My mother’s pathetic nature has now made me the target of an illegal god. If Mother thinks I can be a problem child now, she will regret my birth from here on out.
“Yes!” The voice hissed. “When you see your mother again, tell her I said hello. And that she better return, or else, her little daughter will be getting more than this!”
One split second later, a man appears. I think it’s Anu. But he’s changed since the fall. His eyes are hollow wells of wet blackness. His skin is mummified, while his mouth grins with a deathly joy. In his hand is a dagger curved like a snake slithering in the grass. “Go to your parents now, little girl. Your city is gone.”
Anu slams the dagger into my stomach. I collapse to the wooden floor.
I’ll be damned if my future is decided by anyone but me.
Dagger Fall. Swin an Ally?
Something catches me as I fall, holding my bleeding wound. Anu has already vanished. Coward.
I turn to see Swindle holding my hand and Tuk behind him, looking confused.
“Were you having a vision?” Swindle asks.
"Yes," I say breathlessly, holding my stomach.
The pain in my stomach continues, but the piercing wound evaporated with my vision of Anu.
Swindle takes me out of the commons room and says, “I felt an evil presence, but I didn’t see anything. What happened?”
“My uncle Anu.” Tears well up in my eyes. Now I’m crying before mortals. I feel stupid.
He takes me to a room with two beds and sits me down on one of them. Swin takes his place beside me. I don’t like the orc being close, but at least he’s trying to be nice, I believe. The goblin hops up on the bed across from us, his expression neutral.
“Anu wanted to make an offer,” I say.
The name of Anu doesn’t seem to bother him. The orc only nods and asks, “An offer?”
I don’t want to talk anymore, so I say nothing.
“You know, your pantheon isn’t coming to help,” Swindle says. “Your parents will do nothing.”
I nod to this. It is true. They hate atheists more than they care about people or orcs. The ghouls killing them might actually be seen as a plus. So, Mom and Dad see doing nothing as a victory. The problem is solved while they just sit and watch from on high.
“Why haven’t you used your full powers?” the orc asks.
I look at the floor. “It’s not just that they won’t help. I’m not allowed to be here. If my family sees me, it’s over. They will snatch me away or who knows what. I need to be careful.”
“You can be a goddess, or you can save this city. Not both.” Swindle’s words sound sad and certain. “Join me and turn the tide.”
Anger wells up in me, but I know the orc is right.
“Do you want to save the city?”
This question infuriates me, but I’m not sure why. Why does this question bother me? I stand and the answer comes to me. It angers me because I really do want to save the city, but I also want to save my status, my identity as a goddess.
The goblin and orc walk out, closing the door with a thud and leaving me with only my thoughts.
Now alone, I see Anu’s dagger sitting beside me on the bed. I’m not sure why it is here, but I snatch it.
Anu’s voice speaks in my head. “You can win your parent’s over, Ningal. Kill the orc. He’s more important than you think.”
“His God is gone, and he’s an orc,” I say. “How important can he be?”
“Oh, his God never left. I destroyed this city knowing it would fall without much of a fight from the gods. They want this orc dead that badly. They knew the atheists were in the city. Killing the atheists, who are a disease to them, might prove more important than saving the city.”
“Why not kill this orc themselves?” I ask.
“They are wary of opposing this old God directly, but their fear of this God is overrated. Show yourself to be fearless, and the other gods will respect you. Prove yourself to be an adult. Kill Swin. Put in a good word for me when you see your parents again.
I squeeze the hilt of the dagger and close my eyes. I want to prove myself, but killing Swin means saving the city will be even harder. He has the backing of this old God. Instead, I’m going to get what I want and anger my parents at the same time.
A New God
With the dagger in hand, I exit the front door of the Inn. I’m not alone. Chelsea is on the roof.
My thoughts turn to dark things. The fact is, either way, I lose. How do I make a winning choice? Anu offers me a chance to get in good with my parents and kill an enemy. Swindle offers me a chance to save the people, but it won’t be my city. In truth, it was never my city. It only would have been when I came of age. But with Swindle's way, I can help save Chelsea and the others. Nothing is easy.
I sigh. Closing my eyes, I try to focus my thoughts. I did not come down to the city so that others would decide my fate.
“Don’t worry, Ningal,” Chelsea says from the roof. “Erich, Morn, and the gang are planning an escape. Things are going to be fine.”
“Yes, they are. I’m coming up, Chelsea.” I leap on a wheel barrel and hop up to grab the roof and pull myself up.
“Wow,” Chelsea says, raising one of her eyebrows.
With my god-sight, I see the wards that create an invisible fence around our Inn against the undead. Several of them are gone from when the ghouls chased us to the Inn gate. “Who created these wards?” I ask.
“Mina,” Chelsea says.
“I will improve them.”
Chelsea only nods.
Dozens of fiery magical circles light up the ground and vanish within a second. New circles fill where the ghouls had come. That will keep Anu’s ghouls away.
My god-sight tells me that the gods are looking away to Philosopher’s Square. With my own eyes, I see ghouls are gathering there. They are clamoring for a final strike. We don’t have long. I then say to Chelsea, “Allow me to add magic to your arrows.”
Plucking out her arrows, I give them similar magic to what the wards possess. They will burn ghouls on impact. Thin lines of magical writing glow like fiery ink as I imbue them with power. Also, one of her arrows will return to her quill, so she will never run out.
Chelsea’s mouth drops at the amount of magic I’m doing, “That would take a wizard days. The power—”
I put my finger to my lips. “Not a word.”
She nods to that, but her brows knit together in confusion, no doubt wondering where my powers came from.
Hopping off the roof, I go inside the Inn and look for other ways I can help. Soon I will be searching for Swindle. I still don’t know what to do.
Next, to the commons room, where I find Morn and Erich. The door is made of heavy wood with an expensive doorknob. Inside is a treasure room of weapons and magical objects.
“Girl, go," Morn says. "We will be giving out weapons shortly.”
Morn speaks in whispers to Erich.
I step in, ignoring them.
“Very well, take a sword, then leave us. We’re planning an escape which will happen shortly.”
"Don't underestimate my power," I protest, then close the heavy door behind me without a hand.
Morn’s eyebrows raise. “Look, little lady, I have no patience for simple tricks.”
I snatch the coral ax from his hand. It has the magical ability to slowly grow coral with each cut inside the wound. In my hand, it glows like the sun. Both the men cover their eyes. “I’ll give this to Swindle.”
Erich opens his eyes as the glow fades from the room. “You aren’t just Ningal, are you?”
“No, I am the Ningal.”
Erich pales a bit, remembering that he turned me down when I asked him to kill Swin.
“About Swin—” he says.
“Never mind that. I have plans for him,” I say, with a gesture to the ax. I slide the weapon into my belt and turn
my attention to a throwing knife. With a bit of magic, I make it deadly accurate.
“This isn’t going to be enough,” Anu whispers to me.
“It doesn’t matter, Anu. You will lose today.”
I touch every weapon and piece of armor, giving them powers. My parents may notice, but I am not using more power than a human can at one time. Albeit, no human can do what I am doing over and over again. Also, my father and the pantheon are more likely watching the spectacle at Philosopher’s Square. I will gather the ire of my parents and the pantheon. But only Anu will try to strike me.
I look directly into Morn’s eyes. “Every weapon or shield here must go into the hands of the city folk or an adventurer.”
I find Swindle in the commons room and give him the coral ax. He thanks me, and before I can explain the powers of the weapon, he says, “You must give up any idea that you are a goddess.”
That’s straight to the point. I cross my arms before I speak. “And what will happen to me? My parents might kill me if I change sides.”
“God is fair. You inherited this lie. You did not make it.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means God does not blame you for the lie you were born into.”
Why does making choices have to be so hard? I don’t know if this orc is telling the truth, but my parents have destroyed my future for their own convenience. When this city falls with my name attached to it, mortals will think twice before praying to me. I’ll give this orc a chance for now. “Very well.”
The orc continues, “I don't know the future. I'm not sure we can save the city as a whole, but I know we can save these people.” Swindle stands. “Use all your powers for good. Not just for yourself. You’ve been holding back for your own sake. Be a hero or be a false god—your choice.”
“If I use too much power, orc, my parents will know it is me. Right now, they can’t see me. If I join your side, it is to save these people, and it’s a one-time deal. I have a plan.” I touch him and heal his ghoul wounds from the run.
“Thank you,” the orc says.
Illegal Gods Page 5
