“It changes everything. You had no right to withhold this from me, Mom.”
“Oh darling, we were just waiting for the right time to tell you, and then when your father died, I just couldn’t bring myself to add to your pain.”
It took some doing, but I finally tracked down my mother aboard the Queen Victoria cruise liner. I imagined her tall, slim form pacing back and forth in the purser’s office, one hand clutching the receiver of the ship-to-shore phone while long fingers brushed the graying blonde hair off her face, brows furrowed.
My father died when I was sixteen, and from that day until the day I passed the bar, my mother, with single-minded determination, made it her sole mission in life to ensure I took my “rightful place” in society. She took the same calculated approach she did with most things, ensuring I met the right people at the right time to get to the right place. I’d thought she’d have an aneurysm when I did a stint as a public defender, but I stood my ground, and it was with very little grace she accepted I was an adult who could make my own decisions.
As much as I loved my mother, it wasn’t her effusiveness or warmth that won the day. Truth be told, it was a relief when she decided to become one of the cruising set making it easier for me to avoid her meddling. She meant well; she just couldn’t help herself.
“Do you know anything about my birth parents?”
“Very little. Your parents were Jane and Clifton Graham, and they were killed in a car accident. When your father and I found out we were unable to have children, we decided to adopt. The moment we saw you, we knew you were ours, and we couldn’t have loved you more, Danny.”
Only my mother could get away with calling me Danny, a nickname I detested but accepted as an endearment from her. As for her love, I had no doubt of how much she loved me, almost to the point of smothering. I sighed and looked at the ceiling. At least now I knew why I’d always had the nagging sense of not belonging. Despite the love and attention showered on me by my parents, I’d always felt there was something that kept me apart, something different about me. Despite my blond hair and blue eyes, I had very different looks from those of either parent. I’d thought perhaps I was a throwback to another generation, but now I knew otherwise.
“I realize that, but I’ve got to find out who I am.”
“Look, don’t run off and do anything silly. We can talk about this more when I get back.”
I wished her a safe trip, and we hung up.
I tried to put everything into perspective. Not knowing my birth parents didn’t change who I was. Doesn’t it? Then there was the job offer to consider. On some level, being a lawyer sucked, but I couldn’t deny I was successful. Hell, if I accepted, I could be a senior partner at one of the most prestigious law firms in New York.
So what wasn’t to like? Every heartbeat reminded me that no matter what my brain said, I just wasn’t happy and wanted more. Did I have the capacity just to chuck it all and start a new life? One step at a time, Daniel; one step at a time.
Maybe if I found out more about just exactly who I was, I could figure out what I wanted to do next. Hope springs eternal. Logan’s cynical words popped into my head. Ever since she’d sat in my office, tears streaming down her adorable face while she put on the brave front, I couldn’t get her out of my head. Oh hell, truth be told, I hadn’t been able to get her out of my head since the day I met her, but I had managed to push thoughts of her to the back recesses. Out of sight, into fantasy.
Why had this woman, this woman who belonged to someone else, taken possession of my head? It wasn’t like this was the first time I’d met her. It’s not like our paths hadn’t crossed before. We’d met many times before at company functions and the dinner parties Greg liked to throw for our esteemed clients. As if by some unspoken agreement, Logan and I had exchanged a few polite words before pretending to ignore each other.
I tried to resist, but couldn’t help watching her charm everyone, wishing it was only me who held her attention. When she did look my way, I wanted to believe it was because she wanted me. Who was I kidding? I couldn’t blame her for thinking I was just another jerk lying to her about her money. I should have told her the truth: “Yes, your husband is just an ass, screwing every bimbo he can put his hands on and you out of your money.”
I know I should mind my own business, but when she directed her anger at me, it really bothered me. As much as I tried, I couldn’t let it go. She didn’t deserve the crap Greg put her through. She was smart and beautiful, and she deserved a hell of a lot more than an inconsiderate ass of a husband who treated her like dirt.
It was still early evening, and I was already on my fourth glass of rum, trying to chase away the emotions coursing through me. Pissed and pissed off, I crawled into bed. I should have been more forthcoming with Logan. She asked for my help and what did I do? Nothing.
So many times I’d longed to tell her how I felt about her, but I knew that would be out of line. And Lord knows what I would tell her anyway. It’s not as if I was looking for a relationship after the fiasco with Justine, my former fiancée. Regardless, after what happened today, Logan would probably laugh in my face, and who could blame her? God, she excited me.
I imagined taking her in my arms, holding her, comforting her, telling her I would make it right for her. She would fold herself into my embrace, her brilliant eyes a pleading expression of need reflecting how empty she felt. How lost. Telling me how much she needed me to take away the pain, to need her, to love her, to take her now. No complications; no regrets. I slid between the covers and into the blanket of my fantasy’s embrace.
Just make love to me. I want to feel you slide into me. I want to lose myself in you. Give me to you. To lose myself in your passion. Fuck me, Daniel. Fuck me!
I moaned into the pillow, my hand grasping my hard cock. Touching myself, letting my hand slide along the rigid shaft, tantalizing the growing sensation. I stroked myself harder, faster, becoming desperate to overcome the now painful need for release.
Every muscle in my body contracted. My head snapped back into the pillow. The shock of pure pleasure wracking my body in uncontrollable bliss. Warm cum shot onto my abdomen, matching each spasm pulsating through my body. I continued stroking myself with a slow, firm grip, attempting to prolong the sensation. Unwilling to lose the feeling. I drifted into sleep, still thinking of Logan.
I woke to my annoying alarm and a blistering headache. A great combination to start my day. However, it wasn’t the time to feel sorry for me. My confrontation with Logan left a bitter taste in my mouth. She was right—I should have done more than cover for Greg. I was becoming one of those company men that think it’s more important to cover your ass than to take a stand for the client. No more. I liked Logan, and I wasn’t going to let her go down while I sat back and watched Greg screw her out of her money. I was determined to get my life back on track.
I mentally ticked off my To Do list and picked up the phone. Caplan, Fitzgerald, Earp, & Andrews was the largest U.S. investment law firm by revenue and the second biggest in the world. Most lawyers would kill for an offer to join the prestigious old firm as a full partner; it would be the coup of a career. Yet here I sat, all lukewarm and hesitant about the idea.
“Hello, Theodore, Daniel Masterson here. I want to thank you once again for your offer of a partnership at Caplan. I have a family emergency to deal with, and I’ll be away for the next three to four weeks. I’d like to give your offer due consideration while I’m gone. Are you okay with me giving my answer when I return?”
“Give me a minute.” A second later, muzak blared through the receiver. I sighed. The only thing I hated worse than being on hold was being forced to listen to someone’s idea of phone entertainment they call music. I drummed my fingers on the desk while I waited.
“That will be fine. Ideally, we would like an answer sooner; however, we want you firmly committed should you decide to accept our offer. Take the time you need.”
“I appreciate that. I�
�ll let you know my answer as soon as I’m back.”
“Good luck.” Theodore clicked off the call.
One down. I decided against going into the office and enduring another confrontation with Greg. I fire up my email program instead.
To: [email protected]
From: [email protected]
Subject: LOA
* * *
Greg— A family emergency has come up, and I'll be gone for the next three to four weeks. I've reassigned my active files, and Susan can answer any questions. I'll check in when I can.
* * *
Daniel
* * *
Daniel Masterson, LLB
Dick, Masterson, and Associates
I picked up the phone again. This was a message I did not want to put in writing. Our accountant, Alice Knight, was a stalwart at the firm, and I’d trust her with my life, but anything that went through our computer security system could be traced.
“Alice, Daniel here.”
“Good morning. Give me a moment to close my office door.” That explained the formality in her tone. I waited through the silence.
“There, that’s better. What can I do for you?” I could hear the smile in her voice.
“Any problem transferring back the funds?”
“None at all, but I’m telling you Greg is going to throw a shit hemorrhage when he finds out about it.”
“Don’t you worry about that. I’ll take care of Greg. Listen, something’s come up, and I’m leaving town for a few weeks. Could you keep an eye on my trust accounts and make sure there are no more offshore transfers?”
“I can do that. How should I get a hold of you if need be?”
“Try my cell.”
She laughed. “You mean you might actually have it turned on?”
“I’m not that bad.”
“Yes, you are. I know the drill. Leave a message and you’ll…”
“Get back when I can,” we chorused in unison. Laughing, I hung up the phone. Alice was good people, and she was one of the few things that made working at the firm a pleasure.
My life was about to take a big turn, and I needed to consider what that meant for my future. One thing I did know was that I was determined to get my life back, and one person seemed to be at the root of my discomfort. Logan. As foolish as it might seem, I couldn’t stop thinking of her.
Chapter 5
Logan
“You can’t stop there, Raphael. How did she avoid the reverend’s wrath?”
Raphael’s lips curved into the smile of the wise and ancient. “Ah, my dear, but that is the privilege of the story teller. I haven’t had this much fun in years. I certainly do enjoy your unrestrained enthusiasm,” he said.
He took several long sips of his tea while gently rocking his large wicker rocking chair.
“One thing the locals never attributed to Anais was her sense of humor,” Raphael said. “When it came to her attention that Reverend Griffin called her place the Temple of Temptation, she came up with a plan to further protect her privacy and get back at the good reverend. In one fell swoop of ingenious propaganda, she made it known that her home would open its doors, but by invitation only.
“I can tell by your expression you’re about to question the obvious contradiction. Why would Anais propose the antithesis of her need for seclusion and privacy? Therein lies her genius.”
“How so?” I was fascinated by this woman and could easily imagine how she must have felt, ostracized by local society yet safe in her refuge with her lovers.
“She crafted wooden tablets that could easily be held in one hand. They were beautiful pieces with ornately engraved scroll work running along the top and bottom. On corresponding sides of the tablet, she carved a naked woman and man with intricate detail. Both provocatively posed in an explicit representation of two people in the throws of lascivious sexual ecstasy. On one side, she inscribed “Ticket to Temptation” and on the other “The Chosen One.”
“I still don’t get it. How did this protect her privacy?”
“Patience, patience,” Raphael said. “I’m just getting to that. Talk about Anais’s intention to invite people to the house spread like wildfire. Most of the gossip was sheer speculative nonsense, but like all rumors, there was a kernel of truth to some of it.”
“Like what kind of rumors?”
“Rumor had it that the chosen ones were lost souls trying to find their way. Their identity was revealed to Anais in dreams. Upon receiving an invitation, the chosen one had free will to accept or decline. If accepted, the path to the house of enlightenment would be unveiled, for their eyes only.”
“I still don’t understand how that gave her privacy.”
“It was in the nineteen twenties and thirties. Anais knew how superstition ruled the day. There was also the issue of the location of the house on a sacred Indian burial ground. If people believed the only safe way to the house was by invitation, their focus turned to who would be chosen rather than seeking it out on their own. Remember, they believed one would lose their soul or be cursed if they attempted to do so.”
“Okay, I get that part, but how would that help Anais get back at the reverend?”
Raphael almost fell off his chair as he erupted into an uncontrolled belly laugh.
“That’s the best part of all. No one knew how it got there, but Reverend Griffin discovered the first tablet lying on his pulpit. He immediately burned it, loudly proclaiming it blasphemous idolatry. However, he was widely ridiculed for being the first chosen one, leading to his downfall.”
“Pure genius. You’ve got to love poetic justice. Did Anais really send tablets to anyone else?”
Raphael looked at me steadily, his face quite serious.
“Oh yes, Anais truly believed the physical expression of sexuality led to a state of ecstasy opening a gateway to the soul. Maintaining a state of arousal became an obsession in her search for fulfillment. She had her two lovers to support her efforts but felt it was her calling to help those seeking answers to an otherwise desperate life. Indeed, those were the chosen ones.” He smiled knowingly. “Some said it was her way of soliciting new blood to feed her insatiable appetite, and they wouldn’t be wrong.”
“What if these chosen ones declined the invitation? What was to stop others from taking the tablet for themselves?”
I thought I’d caught him up short on that one, but he responded calmly, without the slightest hesitation.
“It is my understanding that the paths to the house only revealed themselves to chosen ones who came with the tablet in hand.”
Not to be deterred, I said, “You can’t tell me others wouldn’t take the tablet or ticket as the reverend called them, believing they could use it for themselves.”
“No, I can’t tell you that, but I would remind you of those found lost and quite mad wandering through the forest.”
Damn, he’s good. There’s a lot to discover here.
“That’s quite the story, Raphael. Let me guess. You’re a writer who enjoys the seclusion so you can put pen to page without distraction. With a story like that, I could almost believe you’re a fellow romance writer. Or perhaps a retired entertainer with a flair for the dramatic?”
“You flatter an old man, my dear. I assure you, I am but a simple caretaker who fills his day preserving the dignity of a beautiful home.”
“Oh, I have the feeling you’re so much more than a simple caretaker.” I took a sip of the addictive tea. “I can’t remember when I’ve enjoyed myself so much. I can tell you my day certainly didn’t start out that way.”
“Life does have a way of testing one sometimes. I hope you don’t think it presumptuous of me. However, I see a beautiful woman searching for answers but afraid of what she might find. Then again, it could be the rambling of an old man who doesn’t know what he’s talking about and should know better.”
“No, no, you’re correct, Raphael. I guess I don’t hide it very well. Maybe I could be Anais’s
next chosen one. I could use a little enlightenment.”
Good grief! What on earth made me say that?
Raphael smiled. “Finding your way here already makes you a chosen one, my dear, but enlightenment never comes easy. I can see you have some difficult choices ahead of you. I’m sure you know that.”
“Yes, unfortunately, I know that too well. But that’s a subject for another time.”
Raphael nodded. I gave my head a shake. The last thing I needed to do was fall for the myths surrounding this magical place.
“This has been very pleasant. Thank you for the tea and your time. It’s been a real pleasure meeting you.”
Raphael bowed his head slightly. “The pleasure was all mine, my lady. You have brought a refreshing respite to my day. It is I who should be thanking you.”
I laughed with delight. This old geezer must have been quite the charmer in his day.
“You really are something. I think I could listen to you forever. However, I’ve taken up enough of your time, and I’d better get back to my life.”
“Of course.”
We both stood, neither saying goodbye as if we didn’t want it to end. After a moment’s hesitation, I offered my hand, which he took with both of his while making a slight bow. If he was twenty or thirty years younger, he might charm the pants right off me. Startled, I shook off the random thought. Where did that come from? It must have been the house.
Linking my arm through his, Raphael escorted me down the porch steps.
“Until we meet again.” He stood very still, quietly watching me walk to the car. Just as I opened the car door, he gestured frantically.
“Oh my,” Raphael said. “I almost forgot. Wait right there. I have something for you.”
He turned swiftly and disappeared into the house. He was back in a minute, his right hand behind his back and a mischievous grin spread across his craggy face.
Ticket to Temptation Page 4
