“Will you stay with me a while longer?” he asked.
“Of course,” she told him, standing and reaching for his hand.
They walked quietly into the house, pushing the door closed behind them and leaned against it as they kissed again, neither of them holding anything back. Their heated kisses lead to an urgency that they couldn’t deny, their clothes slowly falling to the floor as they peeled them from one another on the way to his bedroom. There was no going back as their naked bodies intertwined across his bed, exploring one another eagerly.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered against her skin, planting soft kisses as he took a slow tour of her perfect contours. Her back arched toward him as he made his way from the soft globes of her breasts to her rapidly moistening folds and lapped at her velvet center. She moaned beneath him as he grew more and more aggressive with his tongue, suckling her clit while she writhed beneath him in ecstasy. Her nails dug into the bed, her hips rising to meet his mouth as he quickly brought her to one of several orgasms and eagerly drank the fruit of his labors from her center.
“God, I want you inside of me,” she cried out pulling him upward toward her.
He resisted, continuing his maddening assault on her dripping folds as she squirmed beneath him. He thought she might pass out. Her nails dug ferociously into his back, driving him crazy. The vibrations seemed to send shock waves down her legs. They visibly quivered as she shattered into yet another climax.
“Incredible,” he whispered against her skin as he dragged his lips up her stomach and across her breasts, taking his time sucking and biting at them, prolonging the ache he felt for her. His mouth covered hers as he moved up to kiss her, exploring her deeply with his tongue and slowly slipping inside her. Vanessa felt amazing as their bodies rocked back and forth in a mating ritual as old as time itself.
Pulling away from her mouth, he sank his teeth into her neck, causing her to cry out. It only encouraged him as he plunged deeper into her center, grinding his hips against hers with each thrust. They were like a single entity in motion as they met each other’s body violently, their passion taking on a new life as Vanessa’s cries of ecstasy sounded in perfect harmony with Jake’s moans of pleasure. His staying power was incredible, lasting for what felt like hours. Jake lost count of how many times she had climaxed before he sank into her one last time, filling her with a warm flood of orgasmic bliss.
They lay there in the aftermath, her head resting on his chest as he stroked her hair. Neither of them spoke for a while, but it was Jake who finally broke the halcyon silence.
“That was amazing,” he breathed into her hair.
“Yes, it was,” she replied.
Then she had slipped back into the darkness from which she had been born. She was lost among the bits and pieces of nightmares that refused to die. Jake found himself wondering if he would ever know her in such an intimate way or if he were doomed to just be friends with her and never know how she might taste or feel. The dream had been real, all too real. It had been a very long time since he had dreamed of a woman. It had been too long since he had even thought of being with one.
His current situation wasn’t one he had been willing to involve anyone in, but there were still plenty of women who would be pleased to accommodate him with no strings attached. That had never been his style though. Plenty of men out there were content just to find some satisfaction with anyone who might be interested, but that wasn’t his nature. He wanted more. He needed more.
Of course, even with the kiss last night, he doubted things would ever progress to the point where anything more would happen. He knew that was best, but it wasn’t what he wanted. It was far from it. He could maybe cope with the PTSD, the anxiety, but no way could he get someone involved with him in his current situation with Kessler. Unless he could pay off his debt, which seemed a grim proposition at the moment, he was doomed to be a thug for him.
It hadn’t been so horrible when he was dealing with crackheads and wife beaters, but now he had progressed to cancer patients and old men. It would only get worse, he was afraid. At what point did he get caught between doing the human thing and protecting his own hide? It was a line he had no desire to cross.
The phone rang, and he saw that it was Vanessa, so he picked it up. It was still early, and he hadn’t even gotten dressed to go out to the barn yet. Tucker would be looking for him soon.
“Hello?” he said into the phone.
“Hey. I just wanted to check on Apollo before I got out and about for the day. Is he still doing well?”
“Yes. Thank you so much. He seems none the worse for wear really.”
“That’s good to hear. How about you? You are okay?”
“Me? Yeah, I’m just fine.”
“Great. We’ll talk soon then, I guess.”
“Yes. I still need to get him back in the office with you to get neutered. I patched up the back fence to keep him from getting out, hopefully. It might help if he doesn’t have a reason to want to leave though.”
“It will help. Plus, there will be fewer puppies floating around the county.”
“Right. You never know, the dogs in this county might become extinct altogether.”
“I doubt that,” she laughed. “Anyway, I have to get going. Talk to you later.”
“Talk soon.”
Jake ended the call with a broad smile on his face. He felt just the tiniest bit in lighter spirits as he made his way to the shower and got ready for the day to come.
****
Jake’s past enthusiasm had been short-lived. Several days followed. His phone calls to Vanessa had gone unanswered, and he began to wonder if she was perhaps ill — or something worse — until that afternoon when a neighboring rancher told him that she had stopped by and tended to one of his pregnant sows earlier that day. It was if she was avoiding him completely and he had no idea why. Things between them seemed to have been picking up until lately, and she had been completely missing in action. What could he possibly have done to offend her? There was a temptation just to let it go, be done with it, but he didn’t want to. Instead, he thought of the one excuse he had to contact her — again.
Rather than calling her cell, Jake dialed her office number. He was surprised to find himself talking to a different voice on the phone, feeling a moment of panic as the young lady first spoke.
“Is Dr. Hart in?” he asked.
“Yes, she is with a patient right now. Can I help you with something?”
“I don’t know. Who is this?”
“Oh, my god. I’m sorry,” the girl gushed. “This is Heather. I’m her new receptionist. I’m still learning.”
“I see. Heather, I need to make an appointment for my dog to be neutered.” Jake spoke into the phone.
“Sure. I can set that up for you. When did you want to bring Apollo in?”
“As soon as there is a slot available.”
“I can get you in next week. Monday at 7 a.m. Would that work for you?”
“Sounds perfect,” he replied, thinking it would be a good time before the clinic got too busy or she had to get out for rounds through the county. Hopefully, it would give him a chance to see what was wrong. Perhaps he was just paranoid, and it had nothing to do with him.
“Okay. Let me get your details, and I’ll put you on the books,” Heather told him.
Jake gave her what she needed, and they said their goodbyes. He still puzzled over what he might have done to cause a rift but could think of absolutely nothing. It was only Tuesday, so Jake had nearly a week to wait. Maybe she’d come around in that time, and he’d find out what had been keeping her away.
The week crawled by with nothing from her. He could only assume that she didn’t want to talk to him. The more surprising thing, however, was just how much that bothered him. For awhile Jake had found a little bit of hope, but now, he was back to feeling nothing but the grim realities of his life.
7
When Monday rolled around, Jake imagi
ned he was much like a nervous school girl going into a classroom in which her new crush sat waiting to accept or reject her. It was ridiculous feeling like this, and he had no clue when it even really happened. It was as if one day she was some inexperienced vet he couldn’t find himself willing to trust and the next; he couldn’t get her out of his head. Was he really this attached to her or was it just that he had been lured into thinking he could have something that turned out to not be so obtainable, after all. Whatever the reason, he was about to find out where he stood and hopefully, why. Vanessa had pushed him away before, and maybe this was just all her stuff instead of his. If that was the case, then there was nothing he could do.
“Stop it, Jake,” he told himself in the hallway mirror as he passed. He had been agonizing over this in his head long enough. It was time to just deal with whatever was happening. “Come on, Apollo. Let’s go see which of us is getting our balls clipped off this morning.”
Apollo looked at Jake curiously and then followed him as he walked toward the door. Jake opened the truck and motioned for him to get in. Apollo jumped in the front seat, waiting patiently with no idea about where he was going or why. Poor dog, Jake thought.
Jake was surprised to see that he wasn’t the only one in the office. When he arrived, two older women were already there, each one with a cat in a small carrier. He was forced to sit between them while he waited, each one gossiping across him as he sat with Apollo on a leash at his feet. Jake wasn’t sure which of them looked more miserable. He, because of the endless chatter in either ear and Apollo most likely remembering how ill he had been the last time he was in this place.
At first, there was no sign of Vanessa. He told himself it didn’t matter. Jake had to accept that she wasn’t interested in him. Such was life. Then, she stepped out of one of the exam rooms and his heart almost stopped. Vanessa was just as gorgeous as ever. Even in nothing but a ponytail and office scrubs, she was heart-achingly beautiful.
Vanessa didn’t glance in his direction, even though she must know he was there. No doubt she would have looked over her schedule for the day and at least seen his name on it. It was one thing not to be interested, but why was she completely ignoring him? He felt incredibly anxious as the receptionist called one of the ladies back. At least there would be a little peace and quiet with the other one gone.
“That’s a beautiful dog you have,” she said to him.
“Thanks,” Jake replied, trying not to encourage her.
“What is his name?”
“Apollo.”
“How old is he?” she asked.
Jake’s phone vibrated in his pocket. Thank God. “Excuse me, I need to respond to this,” he told her as he looked at the incoming message.
“Oh, of course. What did we do before modern technology?” The lady snapped.
He ignored the comment and looked at his phone. It was a weather text alert telling him that the high today was going to be seventy-five degrees and sunny. He replied to the text anyway with gibberish. The messenger bot dinged right back with a message that it was an automated service and didn’t accept incoming text. Jake furrowed his brow with concern and replied with more gibberish, getting the same response. He continued the “conversation” until the woman beside him was called upon.
Putting his phone back in his pocket, he relaxed and patted Apollo gently on the head as he waited. Another young woman came in with a basset hound, but she didn’t seem interested in conversation, thankfully. Instead, she kept her head buried in her cell phone texting. Jake chuckled as he found himself wondering if she was messaging an automated weather service too.
Finally, it was his turn. The last cat lady exited the exam room and made her way to the reception desk to settle up. He was careful to avoid eye contact.
“Mr. Morrow?” Vanessa said as she stepped out of the exam room.
So, now they were back on last name basis again. If that didn’t sum everything up neatly, nothing did. He stood, and Apollo followed him, wagging his tail when he saw Vanessa. She bent down to scratch behind his ears for a quick moment then stepped back into the room and waited for them to enter before closing the door.
“Okay. This will just be a quick exam to make sure he is in good health. If he is, then we’re good to go. I will do the surgery under a local, and he will need to stay until the end of the day. If all goes well, you will be able to pick him up before we close for the day at five.”
“Good,” he said, with the huge lump in his throat.
“Also, I got the results of the tests from his recent visit. He was poisoned… anti-freeze. Either someone purposely put it out, or you have some exposed somewhere on your property.”
Jake couldn’t believe how very professional she was with him as if he were any other stranger in need of her services. He wasn’t sure why, but it sent him a message loud and clear. So, he would just go with it.
“I don’t think we do, but I will make sure of it. Hopefully, having today’s surgery will curb Apollo's urge to roam quite so much, and he won’t make people angry enough to poison him,” Jake suggested cooly.
“Possibly. So, let me check him over, and if he’s good to go, there is no reason for you to stay.”
“No problem,” Jake replied.
Pulling out his phone, he busied himself reading random posts on social media, so he wasn’t standing there like a lovesick puppy or awkward rejected suitor. After a bit, Vanessa spoke up again, telling him that everything was good to go.
“Thanks. I’ll pick him up later then.”
“Just check with Heather when you come in, and she will bring him up from recovery. He’ll have on a halo to prevent him from gnawing at his incision. Keep that on him for the next few days,” Vanessa instructed.
“A halo?” Jake gave her a sideways look.
“You know, one of those lampshade looking things.”
“Oh. Yes,” he replied, standing. “I’ll go then.”
She nodded, not commenting further. Jake made his way out the exam room and through reception toward the door. As anxious as he had been to get here that morning, he couldn’t get away fast enough. This felt wrong. Still, what could he do? He returned to the ranch and threw himself into work, setting the alarm on his phone to keep himself from looking at it every five minutes, but he found that he did so anyway.
It was like torture waiting to go back there. Jake wasn’t sure if it was because he wanted to see her again or because he didn’t. Of course, he most likely wouldn’t. She didn’t seem inclined to be anywhere in sight when he returned. Much to his surprise, though, she was the one waiting for him when he arrived. The office seemed otherwise empty.
“Is he ready to go?” Jake asked, sticking to business.
Vanessa nodded. “He is. He did just fine. Here are some tablets to prevent any infection and dull the pain of the incision. Just give them as prescribed until they’re gone.”
“Thanks,” he replied.
“The fee will be on your monthly ranch invoice,” Vanessa explained.
Jake nodded and turned to go, but halfway to the door, she stopped him. “I’m sorry that things have changed between us, Jake. I just want you to know that I was enjoying your company.”
He stopped and turned back toward her with Apollo looking woefully up at him from his new lampshade collar.
“Then why did you disappear?”
“You really don’t know?” Vanessa scowled.
“I really don’t. Please tell me why you would suddenly start avoiding me. You wouldn’t even return my calls.”
Vanessa put her hands on her hips. “I have a reputation to keep up here, Jake.”
“Oh, now I’m Jake? Not Mr. Morrow?” he barked at her.
“You’ve no right to be angry with me. I have done nothing but be nice to you. I even thought we might be more. Then I find out that you are beating up men in parking lots. Half the town saw you! What am I supposed to make of that? What am I supposed to do with it? Don’t you think I’v
e had enough trouble in my life without getting wound up with someone who is subject to violence?”
“You’ve no idea what that fight was about. Did you ever consider that I might have had good reason?” Jake stood up straight.
Vanessa took a step closer. “I spoke to you that same morning, Jake and you didn’t even mention it. You know what sort of men don’t mention getting into a fight?”
“The fight wasn’t until later in the day. And what kind of men are you referring too, Vanessa?”
“The kind that gets in fights all the time. Or the kind who have a reason not to mention it. Either way, it spells trouble.”
“So, you just made assumptions and decided to cut off speaking with me? Didn’t even give me a chance to explain? You hear people saying things, who don’t even get their facts straight, then you don’t bother to ask what happened… just take their word for it when you know me, and they don’t?”
“I don’t know you.” Vanessa shook her head from side-to-side. “I’ve met you, Jake. I’ve spent time with you, but I don’t know you at all.” Her face was flushed with anger.
“That’s not my fault. I thought we were getting to know one another. You know me as well as anyone,” Jake bellowed.
“I suspect that may be true, Jake. Which is to say that I don’t really know you at all, do I? No one does! You keep to yourself! You keep secrets from everyone!”
He looked away then back at her. “You don’t want to know my secrets, Vanessa. They aren’t pretty!”
“And you think that I am that shallow? You think we can be close friends if we can’t share and trust one another?” Vanessa’s eyes began to flood.
Jake was quiet for a moment. She was right. He knew that. It was hard to tell anyone the truth about himself. It made him vulnerable, and it wasn’t something most people wanted to hear. Tucker was the person who knew him best.
“Just go,” she told him.
Renegade Ridge Page 9
