by Pamela Ann
“Where is everyone?” I asked, taking a seat right across from him and eyeing him like he wasn’t a delicious sin to be savored, but more like a revolting pickle. God, how I loathed and detested pickles. I hated them with a passion. Speaking of passion, it was the same damn feeling that had gotten me into this awkward position. Next time—well, I had better make sure there wasn’t a next time. Period.
“Mother should be down any moment now,” he informed me as he poured himself coffee. “And as for Archer, he’s still out and about town, as expected.”
Archer. If he was here, he would lighten the strained tension between us. Unfortunately, he was probably still with that ex of his. She was too much to handle in my opinion. Then again, men did like their women a little crazy, didn’t they? That was what my ex Aaron told me one time while trying to make a point of me being too boring at times when I opposed getting drunk on a nightly basis.
Partying during weekends was one thing, but every single day of the week? I just couldn’t do it. Not only didn’t I have the capacity to party like a damn animal, but I just didn’t see the point of being in a constant state of inebriation. It was depressing. Besides, I had classes to attend, and I couldn’t go in one with beer goggles on. It wasn’t my thing. I supposed my decision of wanting to have a better GPA than the average college drunk of 2.0 paved the freedom for his cheating ways.
Ugh. The last thing I needed to harp upon today was Aaron. Shit happened, right?
Plucking up a piece of fresh, oven-baked bread, I welcomed the warmth of it against my fingers. The aromatic scent wafted to me the second I pulled it apart, making me salivate. I supposed there were really nice perks being this rich. I could get used to this kind of breakfast on a daily basis.
Chewing on the lightly buttered bread, I poured myself a cup of coffee. The smell of it alone reminded me of last night and how gorgeous he had looked navigating the kitchen as he made cappuccinos.
Speaking of the man, he was consumed in the newspaper rather than trying to converse with me. Not only had his rejection last night stung, but making it too apparent that it was unmentionable this morning made it worse. It was like getting a paper cut. Though it was tiny, the pain it produced was hard to dismiss because all the focus of your body’s stressors honed in on it.
I wished for a do-over since Cruz was great with me before I moronically kissed him. If I could restart, this moment was as good as any. I just had to cough up the strength and get over my pride.
Glancing across the table, I cleared my throat, ready to wave the white flag of surrender simply to be on friendly terms again.
“You seem to have started your day early. Did you just come back from working in the office?”
Without bothering to look up from his reading material, he responded, “No, I came from my own place, though I stay here infrequently during weekends from time to time.”
So he had left last night.
“Oh. Okay.” That made sense, I supposed. He was, after all, a grown man whose age I still hadn’t discovered.
Before I had the chance to inquire, Margery strolled in with a soft smile on her face.
“Mother.” Cruz smiled at her before getting up from his seat and striding to meet her. Then he guided her to the head of the table, pulling out the chair and waiting for her to take her seat before retreating back to his own. “You’re looking better today, Mum. That new prescription worked better as opposed to the first one, I take it?”
“Yes, my dear son. There’s no need to fret. I’m fine … Really, I am.” She reached out to touch her son’s hand then lightly tapped it, as if to reassure him. They shared a moment of understanding before she turned her attention towards me, bestowing me the same warm smile. “How did last night go? I hope you had fun,” she asked without taking her eyes off me, as though she was waiting for my immediate response.
Fun? Yeah, way too much if I say so myself.
Pasting a strained smile on, I had to squash that small, guilty feeling that surfaced out of nowhere, catching me off guard. “It was good fun.”
“Good.” She nodded, assured, then murmured a kind thank you to her son who had just made her coffee, complete with milk and sugar. “I’m afraid I won’t be able to attend the Ainsworth’s party tonight. Do you mind going with just Ivy?” She expectantly glanced over her son while Cruz simply bore an impassive look.
Who was Ivy? His girlfriend? Fuck. Well, why was he being all too friendly with me at the bar then? I wouldn’t dare flirt with anyone’s man. I wasn’t that twisted a thrill seeker.
Clearing his throat, he nodded. “I will have to check with her. If anything, I could go by myself.”
Margery’s face turned soft, still gazing at him like she was expecting something more. “I don’t mean to pry, but have you two set a date yet? It’s been almost eight months since the engagement and still no word when the wedding will be.”
I choked on the scalding hot coffee that was about to be washed down my throat. Softly tapping my chest, I forced myself to breathe before croaking out, “Excuse me.”
“Are you all right, dear?” Margery held my hand, worriedly eyeing me as if I was about to faint or something. Well, thank goodness I didn’t. That would have been embarrassing. I didn’t need any more reasons to feel humiliated.
“I’m fine. Thank you.” I made a pained smile, hoping it was enough to convince her to get back to prying into her son’s personal life.
ENGAGED? Fuck me. Fuck me bad.
What had I been thinking? I knew it. Cruz was too good to be true. Sigh.
Much to my dismay, Cruz skipped answering his mother. Instead, he spoke about employees and business dealings and prospects.
While he engaged his mother with business updates, I, on the other hand, wanted to know more. I felt as though I was owed answers. It was stupid to think this way, yet it was how I felt. It was hard to justify why that was.
Throughout the time he was with me, he never once mentioned anything about Ivy or his engagement. I wouldn’t have missed that kind of info, knowing how glued I was to him last night, so why had he not disclosed this major factor?
“Serena?” Margery gave me an expectant look.
I blinked a few times, wondering what I had missed. “Sorry, what?” I mumbled, hoping I hadn’t offended her with my flighty mind.
“Your mother mentioned that you needed internship hours. I thought it would be a brilliant idea if Cruz takes you under his wing. It would be a good opportunity for you—”
“Wait, Mum, we need—” he tried to argue, looking ready to combust, but Margery was unrelenting.
“I know it might be odd and difficult for you for a short while, but you will get used to it. Besides, Serena’s like family. Her mother and I agreed that it would be a fantastic prospect for her. It’s already agreed upon. Let’s not try making me break my word to my friend. ”
Obviously seeing the tension in Cruz’s reaction, I knew I had to pacify the situation.
“I don’t think that’s necessary, Margery, but thank you. My school offers a list of companies that will gladly open their arms for these things.”
“Are you implying that my company won’t be the best candidate for internships? Because let me assure you, it wouldn’t be featured in Fortune Global 500 if it weren’t,” Cruz justified with pride and a dash of arrogance.
Well, I had no idea what I was declining to begin with. But Fortune Global 500? Fuck. Having that attached to my resume would be beyond impressive; it would be astounding.
“I wasn’t trying to be rude. I just thought it would be better if you weren’t forced to do it out of kindness to me and my mom.” It was too obvious he didn’t want me working for him, and I couldn’t fault him for that. It was his company, after all, so it was his decision, plain and simple.
Masking his reaction, he threw me a steady look. “No one forces me to do anything, Serena,” he stated in a matter of fact tone before eyeing me with such intensity that I almost forgot to
breathe. “You can begin on Monday after you finish with your classes.”
I was flabbergasted. What had just happened here?
“Mon-day?” I stupidly stammered, astonished at his rapid change of heart.
“That’s splendid!” Margery gleefully exclaimed while I still kept openly staring at Cruz, my soon-to-be boss.
Fuck. Me.
Chapter Seven
“You’re engaged?” I exclaimed irrationally, feeling emotionally bereft and embittered.
It took me about a minute or two after Margery was out of earshot to confront him. If I had chosen not to, it would forever eat me alive. Still, I had to stand my ground and face him, and it was a now or never situation.
“Yes,” he replied without batting an eyelash.
Damn. I could feel something crack.
“How come …? Why didn’t you mention it last night?”
“I don’t know.”
“What do you mean by ‘you don’t know’? How can you not?” I pressed. If it were me who was engaged, I would have told him. He wasn’t necessarily being deceitful about it, nor was he leading me on … but I hadn’t been able to shake the feeling that there was something there. Now I realized how wrong I had been.
Something passed across his eyes before he gave me a frown. “Serena, last night—”
“I’m sorry I kissed you,” I immediately interrupted. “I don’t know what came over me. I’m not usually like that. Maybe it was being in that beautiful, magical garden that made me get carried away.” My reasons sounded unconvincing to my own ears, but it was the best I could do, and whether he believed it or not was out of my control. “Can we just forget that happened? Is that possible?”
“If that’s what you wish.”
I wasn’t wishing on anything. My heart was stammering out of control, and I had no idea why I was reacting as if he and I were dating and he had led me on. It was too much. It was almost making me freak out inside.
“Thank you, Cruz,” I whispered, looking at him, but not really. I didn’t have it in me to stare into those metallic pools that made me feel so alive it was frightening. “I’ll see you on Monday or whenever.” As graciously as I could, I managed to get up without making a fool of myself. “Have a good day.” I gave him a wan smile then spun on my heels, almost sprinting out of the dining room.
My heart galloped as I raced towards the stairs, seeking my bedroom so I could fully grasp everything. It was a relief I didn’t run into any household staff. I’m sure it was easily seen how upset I was.
Holding my breath as I grappled with the bedroom door, I stilled when I heard him say my name. My heart stampeded madly against my chest as I tried to ponder every rhyme and reason for him coming after me. In the end, I knew I couldn’t keep staring at the doorknob. I had to face him and ask him that myself.
“Yes?” I asked as I turned on my heels to face him, barely meeting his intense gaze.
“I …” He breathed out heavily, frowning down at me. “I hope this won’t be a problem between us in the future.”
I hastily shook my head. I didn’t want it to be awkward between us, either. “No, it won’t be a problem. I promise.” I was going to start working under him in two days’ time. Whatever qualms I had prior to working with him had to be squashed, swept under the rug.
He gave me a curt nod, accepting my promise without hesitation. “One more thing …” he hesitantly drawled. “I’m sorry if I led you on. It wasn’t my intention. Well, to be quite clear, I wasn’t sure what I was doing.”
“No, it was my fault. It’s perfectly fine. Let’s forget any of it happened.” I was dying to kill the damn memory.
“Very well.” His frown vanished, replaced with that toe-curling smile I adored too much. “I will see you come Monday, then.”
Why does this man have such an effect in me? I wondered as I swallowed what little moisture I had in my mouth.
“Of course,” I said in a scratchy voice.
“Good day, Serena.” He threw me one last look before leaving me to my own devices.
“You, too.”
Watching him walk away, I released a long, melancholy sigh then shook my head, dismissing any lingering thoughts. The man was engaged. Engaged. He was going to marry someone. He was already spoken for. And for me to daydream about him was disrespectful. I supposed it was better this way. He was out of my league, anyway. He was too good-looking, too rich … well, too everything.
Once school started, hopefully I would meet great friends so I could have my own life, totally separated from these folks. There was nothing wrong with Archer or Cruz, but they were not on my level. I was at the bottom, while they were on top.
It was basically my second day here in this country, and I had already caused problems. I wondered how the rest of my stay would pan out. Hopefully, it would be with less drama, great memories and experiences, and nothing related to the matters of the heart.
With my body clock still stuck on Pacific Time, I decided to stay in today and unwind, unpack, and call my family back home.
Pulling my phone out of my purse, I pressed to call my mom, hoping she wouldn’t cringe at the cost of my roaming charges. I strolled towards the end of the bed, taking a seat while I cradled the phone on my ear, waiting for her to answer.
“Sweetie, how have you been? How are you settling?” My mother’s gleeful greeting made me realize how much I missed home.
“Just tired, but yeah, everything’s been great. Margaret’s been really nice,” I responded with a smile on my face.
“I know! Did she manage to get you an internship? I haven’t spoken to her today. Maybe she’ll call later. Nevertheless, how are you, baby? This is the first time you’ve been out of the nest; I’m actually really nervous. I try not to worry, you know, but it doesn’t help that your dad freaks out, as well. Thank goodness for Grace. She never fails to remind us that we’re a breath away from a nervous breakdown if we didn’t stop worrying about terrorist attacks, getting robbed, and all of that stuff.”
My grin grew wider. Grace, my little sister, was the cute, sarcastic doll I adored too much. My parents were both worrywarts, but she would always take them down a notch.
“I’m fine. Jesus, Mom, I’ve been gone for, like, a couple of days. And, no, there’s no terrorists attacks, but I’ll do let you know if something comes up,” I teased, hoping she would calm her butt down.
“Now that’s not funny, Serena. You should be kind to my nerves. You know how I get,” she reprimanded, but it was obvious in her voice just how much love there was.
“You guys have to stop. Seriously. Have some confidence in me. I can handle this.” Reassuring her somehow worked.
My parents were great folks, but holy crap did they worry. It was to the point of borderline paranoia.
As our conversation progressed, I asked for updates about Grace and how she was doing in school. Grace was in the top of her class, as always. I was the laidback one, while my little sis was the perfectionist in the family. We were like night and day, yet our sisterly bond was as strong as ever.
The more I conversed with my family, the more homesickness settled in. Then again, it also reassured me that I was going to be okay. They grounded me. Thinking about them made me realize what was important in life.
I was here to experience living and studying abroad, not to find a boyfriend.
Boys came and went, but achieving lifelong goals, such as experience and education, that was for life.
Prioritizing was all I had to do. Cruz and his magnetic eyes be damned.
Chapter Eight
“Hello.” I nervously smiled towards the sea of people around me. “I’m Serena. I’m majoring in International Business, and this is my first semester here.” Adding the last bit before taking my seat, I noted how bored the rest of the class looked. This was my first day studying at the University in London, and I wasn’t sure what to expect.
After the rest of them welcomed me, the teacher then went to the n
ext victim. I thanked my lucky stars I didn’t look like a timid idiot. I hadn’t realized how anxious I was until I had entered the classroom.
Back home, I didn’t really have any anxiety issues. I supposed acknowledging I was far from home and away from my comfort zone brought it home today. Teachers and the staff were friendly enough, but there were little things that I still had to get used to.
I had two classes scheduled for today. The last on the roster, Egyptian Mythology, ended at two in the afternoon. Hopefully, I wouldn’t be late to my internship. Margery had given me the address and reassured me that whatever time was fine as long as it wasn’t past five so they could put me in the system.
Elliot Corp. was located in the City of London, and since I was already short of time, taking the tube would delay me even more. The easiest way to get there without wasting time would be taking a cab.
The city was basically littered with cabs everywhere, so it wasn’t a hardship getting one. With added traffic, I ultimately got there thirty-five past two. Perusing Margery’s instructions, I trotted towards the building then straight to reception where I was greeted by a well-poised woman who introduced herself as Charlie. After giving her my name, she handed me a temporary pass and told me my destination was the top floor.
Once I thanked her for helping me, I was on my way to the banks of elevators when I abruptly halted after noticing how everyone was dressed.
I knew it was my first day, so instead of worrying about what to wear, I had been more consumed about my encounters with Cruz, and I had chosen jeans and white, fitted cami. Embarrassment filled me as I looked up, staring at the floor while walking, avoiding the people around me who were sprinting to wherever they needed to be.
My journey felt as if it was going to take forever. The elevator that was jam-packed earlier left me all to my lonesome as they gradually exited as it travelled upwards.
Once it reached the top, I carefully took a step out of the elevator and onto the cool, black marble floor. I was instructed to seek Denise, who was apparently the main assistant I was going to be working under.
