by Claire Kent
Darren shrugged and didn’t answer.
“Now your dad is all flat.”
“He wasn’t really in there.”
“No, he wasn’t. But you spent a long time making it. It’s a shame not to save it.”
Darren just shrugged again.
“Is everything all right with your dad?” Elizabeth asked, feeling a twist of anxiety.
Another shrug.
“Okay. Anytime you want to talk about it, you tell me, okay?”
It took a minute, but Darren eventually raised his head and gave a jerky nod.
That was the best she could do right now. A lot of these children had no experience opening up. They acted in ways that were attempts to hide what they were really feeling.
Just like grown-ups did a lot of the time.
Since Darren was obviously done talking, she moved on so she wouldn’t intimidate him. She went over to where a blond girl named Clara was molding a dog.
“Good job, Clara,” Elizabeth said, kneeling down to get a better look. “I love the ears.”
“Thank you.”
“What is this here?”
“A crown.” The girl sounded faintly outraged that Elizabeth hadn’t recognized the blob of clay on the dog’s head.
“Oh wow. I see now. Why is the dog wearing a crown?”
“She’s a princess.”
“A princess dog! That’s kind of cool.”
“She’s special. Not like a normal dog.”
“I can see she is.” Elizabeth paused. “Normal dogs are special too, though. They’re really good friends to us.”
Claire frowned, obviously thinking this over. “A princess dog is more special,” she concluded.
“Okay. She looks really good.”
Elizabeth moved on to look at the other children’s figurines. She wasn’t surprised by Clara’s conclusion. It was typical of girls of her age and not particularly troubling.
She’d been the same way when she was a girl.
Maybe she was still the same way now.
She’d always been hoping and waiting for the day her life turned special—with the perfect, special man and the perfect, special family.
When what she had all along was already really good.
—
As she walked into the club on Saturday evening, Elizabeth told herself that this was the last time.
She’d had a good time—a great time—being someone different, spending time with Matt, trying on a different persona.
But now was the time to take what she’d learned and go back to her normal life, where there was a real future.
There was no real future here.
It was fine. She was sorry to see it end, but this was the only thing to do. She didn’t want to taint what they’d had by stretching it out to the point where it got messy.
It didn’t have to be messy now. They could have one more evening together and then say good-bye with mutual goodwill—better for having known each other.
So she felt confident and determined as she snagged her favorite table and ordered a scotch one more time. She wasn’t likely to drink it again after tonight. It was part of the life she was living this month. It wasn’t part of her normal world.
Matt must have been backstage because he came out from behind the curtain and took the stairs down to the main floor. He chatted casually with a few customers before coming over to her.
“So what do you say?” he asked with a grin.
“About what?”
“Our challenge.”
“It’s not over until the end of this evening. Then it will be one month, and I’ll be able to declare myself victorious.”
He laughed huskily at her teasing tone, and he rose to his feet. “I’ll be watching you tonight. Don’t enjoy yourself too much, or your victory will come under serious fire.”
She was smiling as he walked away, and after the first routine she realized he’d been telling the truth about watching her. He stood at the back near the bar, in his normal place, the entire evening, and his eyes never left her.
She made a point of not looking over at him too much, but she was aware of his gaze at every moment. So anytime she smiled or laughed, she knew he’d notice and assume she was enjoying herself.
She was enjoying herself, but not because the hip pumping and body rolls had started to turn her on. She knew the guys by now, knew their personalities, and she knew the servers and Robbie and even the hulking, silent guy who worked security.
There was still something silly and over-the-top about all the antics, but she wasn’t uncomfortable here anymore.
She thought maybe Matt would do his act tonight—one last time for her—but he didn’t seem inclined to move from his place in the back. At just after ten she glanced over toward him and saw he was still watching her.
His expression looked different somehow. Not challenging or sexy. Instead it looked strangely deep. Intense. Like he was feeling something more.
The look made her catch her breath, but she reminded herself not to get carried away or start hoping for something that just couldn’t happen.
She might have lived her life in hope—in expectation—but this was something that could never, ever come to fruition. It would never work. Not with who the two of them were.
It was fine.
Some things—as good as they were—were only supposed to be temporary.
He’d stopped himself whenever he started opening up about his life, his past, his mother. He clearly didn’t want them to be intimate in any way other than the physical. There was no way they could be in a real relationship.
Without thinking it through, she got up to walk over to him.
“Aren’t you going to do your thing tonight?”
He smiled at her. “What thing?”
“Your stripper act.”
He shook his head. “Nah. That might tip the scales in my favor, since I know how you can’t resist it. And I prefer a fair challenge.”
She laughed and reached up to wrap her arms around his neck, feeling a wave of affection for him she couldn’t possibly suppress. “Oh, your ego knows no bounds.”
“It’s true, though, isn’t it? You always get turned on when I perform for you.”
“Maybe. A little.”
“And you’ve started enjoying yourself here.”
“Because I get fucked really good here. Anyone would enjoy that.”
“You haven’t gotten fucked tonight, and you seem to be having a good time.”
“It’s always fun to watch you trip all over your inflated head.”
He chuckled as he leaned down to kiss her lightly. “Tell me the truth. I won the challenge, didn’t I?”
“I am telling the truth. You didn’t win. You said I would enjoy the whole stripper thing, and I don’t. You’re the only performer who has managed to turn me on, and that’s because I have context for you. I have a full story for you in my head. So it’s not just the moves or your body that turns me on. It’s the whole the package.” She suddenly blushed hotly, realizing what she’d said.
His eyes were hot and amused and possessive. “Is that right? My whole package turns you on?”
“You know very well it does. But the point is that it’s not just your stripper moves that do it. This whole thing doesn’t do it for me. I won the challenge, not you.”
He pressed her backward until her shoulder blades connected with the bar. Then he trapped her with his body, tilting his head down so he could speak softly and still be heard over the roar of the crowd. “The challenge wasn’t just about finding the stripper moves sexy. The challenge was you letting go of your inhibitions, taking off the perfect-girl image you always wore. The challenge was for you to experience how free you can be when you aren’t always trying to be someone unreal. And you’ve done that, haven’t you?”
When he lifted his head, she stared up into his deep gray eyes, her breath catching in her throat.
“You’ve loved it, haven’t yo
u?” he demanded, his voice hoarse with emotion she didn’t understand.
“Yes,” she admitted. “I’ve loved it. But I didn’t think that was the challenge.”
“It was.” He leaned down to kiss her again, very softly, very slowly, until pleasure and feeling rose up in her body together. “So I won the challenge after all.”
And in that moment she knew what she was feeling. She knew everything she was feeling. It wasn’t just lust. And it wasn’t just affection for a temporary fling.
She was suddenly overwhelmed. She wanted to pull Matt close and never let him go. She wanted to share with him everything she was feeling now, everything she would ever feel in the future. She wanted for him to do the same with her.
And it was wrong. It was just plain wrong. She gasped and pulled away from him awkwardly.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, his brows drawing together.
She was panting now—with fear and a kind of horror that she’d been utterly stupid after all. Instinctively, without thinking it through, she whirled around and walked quickly out of the club.
She wasn’t sure why, but she just had to get away—as soon as she could.
She was in danger here. Very real danger.
Danger to her heart.
She was outside when she realized Matt had followed her, but she just kept walking.
“Elizabeth,” he said, falling in step with her. “Elizabeth, baby, what’s the matter?”
“Nothing.”
“Don’t lie to me. Obviously something is wrong. Did I say something?” His face was concerned, bewildered, and it made her chest clench painfully. She kept walking quickly until she reached her car.
She tried to click the doors unlocked, but he covered her hand with his, taking the keys out of her hand.
“You’re not going to walk out on me like this without telling me what’s wrong,” he said thickly. “What the hell just happened?”
“Nothing.” She rubbed her face, feeling so much more than she should be feeling for this incredible man who wasn’t anything she should want. “I just…I don’t know. I just…”
“You just what?” he demanded softly. He had her trapped between his arms, both of his hands braced on the car behind her.
“I’m not sure,” she admitted. “I just freaked out.”
“About what?”
“Nothing real.”
He leaned closer. “You can tell me.” His breath blew against her skin. “I want to hear what it is.”
“Do you ever,” she began, swallowing hard over the words but unable to stop herself from saying them, “want something so badly that it terrifies you?”
“Oh yeah,” he breathed. “All the time.”
From the look in his eyes, she wondered if he was talking about her. Maybe he was feeling for her the way she was for him—maybe it made him scared and confused too. “Well, at least I’m not alone.”
“Never.” He pressed his body into hers as he kissed her, and it got deep so quickly she lost her breath. She twined her arms around his neck and held on tightly as his tongue plunged into her mouth.
Her head spun as the kiss got more intense, as emotion and sensation overwhelmed her so deeply she could only cling to Matt’s neck and let the tidal wave overtake her, and pray at the end of the ride she would be washed up safely onshore.
“Elizabeth,” he murmured over her lips when he finally drew back to give them both a needed respite.
“Mm.” Her hands finally found enough coordination to stroke their way down his lean back, loving the feel of his firm flesh and hard bones beneath the cotton of his shirt.
“You don’t still want to leave, do you?”
“No.” She gasped when he tilted his head down and gave her a little nip just under her ear. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“Good.” He pushed his pelvis toward her belly and she could feel the hard bulge of his arousal there. “Me either.”
He claimed her lips again, and if possible it was even deeper and hungrier this time. Her vision darkened as he devoured her mouth, his tongue dueling insistently with hers. His hands were all over her body now, stroking her eagerly, almost clumsily, but still managing to tease her to new heights of arousal.
She wasn’t even aware of their location, making out against her car in the middle of the parking lot of a strip club. Nothing mattered but how she was feeling—how they both were feeling—right now.
“Matt, please,” she panted, finally tearing her mouth away when she thought she might actually pass out. “I want you now. I need you now.”
He made a low groan in the back of his throat, and he pushed up her skirt and lifted one of her thighs so her leg was wrapped around his. He ground himself against her pussy through their clothes, and she let out a frantic whimper from the intense pleasure of it.
She was clawing at his shirt now, not trying to get it off but rather needing something to hold on to. “Matt, now. Now!” She fumbled with the button on his jeans until it finally broke free, and she eagerly stuck her hand into his pants until she could wrap her fingers around his cock.
He made another guttural sound, like he was on the verge of losing it just as much as she was. He gathered her up to get her into a better position, bracing her against the car, and then he eased his hips forward, moving aside her panties and guiding his cock inside her with one hand.
She let out a breathy cry as the hard substance of him entered her. She wrapped her legs around him as tightly as she could, trapped and helpless in her position. She wasn’t entirely comfortable, but she couldn’t have cared less about that. Nothing had ever felt so deep, so intense, so real, so thrilling in her life.
He couldn’t thrust—not holding her up the way he was—so he just pushed against her, causing his cock to move slightly back and forth. With all the other stimulation, it was enough, and she dug her fingernails into his back as an orgasm started to build.
She should have been embarrassed. She should have been self-conscious. She should have been terrified that someone would drive up or come out of the club and see the way they were fucking so shamelessly against the side of a car—right out in public.
She wasn’t any of those things, though. Her head felt like it might explode with pleasure, and her body felt entirely out of her control.
And she wanted it. All of it. Even more of it than this.
She wanted even more of Matt.
He was huffing as he rocked his hips, building both of them up to orgasm. Soon she was so close she almost banged her head back against the car as she started to jerk and shake.
“That’s right, baby,” Matt rasped. “Show me what you’ve got. Show me how I make you feel. Show me who you are.”
She was almost sobbing as she lingered right on the edge. “Matt, please. Oh God, please!”
He pushed into her hard and fast, his face tight and damp and mesmerizing. “You’re almost there. Just let it come. Don’t try to fight it. Don’t hold it back.”
She was trying, squirming desperately and whimpering as the sensations kept tightening without breaking.
“You’re not the girl everyone thinks you are.” His voice was rough and low and staccato with his rhythm. “You’re not the girl you always thought you were. This is you. Stop holding back.”
She heard his words with a blaze of feeling, and then a blaze of pleasure followed in close pursuit as her orgasm finally uncoiled.
She made a helpless sobbing sound as her pussy contracted around Matt’s cock, and he let out a stifled bellow as the pleasure broke on his face as well. He made a few jerks against her as he climaxed, primal in his animalistic motion.
Then finally her body started to relax, and Matt let out a stretched groan as he stepped back and released his hold on her.
She almost fell to the pavement. She would have without the support of the car and the way Matt wrapped his arms around her in a hug.
She hugged him back, loving the feel of him, the strength of him, the sol
id presence of him.
It was a full minute before her mind started to work and she could process what had just happened.
She hadn’t heard any cars or voices, so it didn’t seem like anyone had caught them. But still…
She couldn’t believe they’d just done that.
Matt pulled back, replacing his cock and fastening his jeans, as she pulled her skirt down over her hips.
They looked at each other sheepishly, and Elizabeth had the ridiculous urge to laugh when she suddenly realized how wet she was between her legs.
“Oh shit,” she breathed, the reality hitting her hard. “Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.”
Matt’s face twisted as he must have remembered it too. “No condom. Damn it.”
She took a shuddering breath, momentarily terrified by a number of unpleasant possibilities. But before she could say anything or get her thoughts together, a screeching of tires made her turn her head to look toward the entrance of the parking lot.
A black SUV roared into the lot and stopped abruptly in front of Bare Assets. Before she could figure out what was happening, the back door opened and a woman’s body was pushed out.
It was sickening—the sight and sound of the limp body hitting the pavement.
She was frozen with astonishment as the SUV’s door closed and it accelerated, leaving as quickly as it had come.
She stared at the woman on the ground.
Matt must have processed the situation more quickly than she did. She heard him mutter, “Mom,” and then he raced toward the body.
It was his mother. His mother. In a lifeless heap on the ground.
Chapter 9
When she was finally able to make her body move, she hurried after Matt, wincing, as her thighs and back were sharply sore from the sex they’d just had.
She wasn’t thinking about sex now, though. She was thinking about Matt’s tight, almost motionless face as he knelt beside his mother.
She knelt down too, almost losing her balance when a pain in her thighs flared intensely. “Is she okay?”
He was feeling her pulse and leaning over, evidently to see if she was breathing. “I think she’s alive,” he muttered, his face still reflecting nothing, as if he’d suddenly closed down or shut off. “Oh fuck, Mom, can you hear me?”
