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Loreless Page 10

by P J Whittlesea


  Doug shifted in his stool and looked Billy squarely in the eye. ‘Well, I’ve been hav’n a bit of a think about your situation. So I had a chat before with the boys,’ said Doug, flicking a thumb towards Rob and Tex. ‘I think it might be better if you go back out to the community with them for a while. You won’t have much, just a roof over your head, but it’ll give you some time to work out what you wanna do next. They can always use an extra set of hands out there. Who knows, maybe you’ll learn something. What was it you said you did back in the city?’

  ‘I just finished studying to be an accountant.’

  There was a moment of silence and then all three men burst into laughter. Rob nearly fell off his stool before managing to compose himself. ‘Hope you’re up ta gettin your hands dirty then.’

  Billy ignored their response, still slightly taken aback by their generosity. ‘Are you sure it’s ok?’

  Rob and Tex stopped smirking and chimed in unison. ‘Yeah, no worries.’

  ‘Then it’s settled,’ said Doug.

  Rob took the comment as an indication that they should leave. He stood, interlocked his fingers and stretched his arms above his head. His back cracked under the strain. ‘Ok, let’s get a move on then.’

  8

  Well 15, Manjanka, 1906

  We thought the dry times were over and the land could provide for us again. But the rain has brought with it a new threat. The invaders have come to take our water. They have encroached further into our homelands and have already taken over some of our most reliable waterholes. They have brought with them an enormous number of their own animals. These creatures require great quantities of water and are draining our sources. We still have the soaks but they are under threat as well. They have dug some of them out to get down to the water deep in the bowels of the earth and have built something they call a well around them. Because of this we can no longer readily access the soaks. We have already lost one of our warriors when he fell into one of these holes trying to access the water. He drowned before we could get to him. We would never dig a deep hole, only a shallow one and then, using a hollow reed, we would stick it into the ground and drink our fill. As with all things we only take whatever we need and leave it intact for others to use. There is a fine balance with these water sources and it is far better to let the land run its course than to change it. Without water we are surely doomed.

  Over the course of the preceding seasons there was no rain whatsoever. The sky had turned to bone. We had prepared for this eventuality as we always do. It transpires from time to time that the land cannot provide sufficiently for us. Through careful planning we have always found a way to get through difficult periods. We see the signs leading up to this and make ourselves ready for it. We amass food and keep it in storage, but we are still required to tighten our hair strings in order to ensure that our meagre supplies will last. It is not always clear when the dry will come to an end. The spiritual men can give advice but they are also bound by the information that the land supplies. These past seasons of dry were particularly long and harsh. At one stage, and as a last resort, we had even considered going to the invaders for help. Our supplies were severely depleted. This would have meant doing things against our will. We were not prepared to do this and my fathers decided not to have anything to do with them at all. At least not directly. On a number of occasions we did manage to kill one or two of their animals. The risks were great, though, and we were in continual fear of reprisals. Our defences are weak as our warriors no longer have the numbers to fight them effectively. Many seasons ago they stormed our camp and we lost a great many of our womenfolk. Thankfully, we were able to marry into neighbouring tribes and in doing so could keep the family going. It has been a great relief to successfully build our numbers again.

  It is a further consolation that the spiritual men have been successful and the dry has come to an end. The sky has opened and water is flowing once again. However, with the returning rains, the invaders have taken the opportunity to ensconce themselves further into our territory. We now find ourselves in a dire predicament. We no longer face solely a struggle with the land. Another dilemma is afflicting us and it has taken on a human form.

  At present I am being held captive along with several other men from our family. They have bound us together by the neck so that we cannot run away. We are tied to one of their animals and are being dragged along behind it. Linked like this, we are like a snake made out of men. One of us has already been killed and we fear that more of us will succumb before they have obtained what they seek. They want to know where the water sources are. Once found, they will destroy the soak and dig one of their own holes. This will make it impossible for us to access it in the future. The bindings hurt. They cut into my shoulders and the material, a kind of stone, becomes extremely hot in the sun. It burns into my neck. We do not have the tools to remove them and no longer have weapons to defend ourselves. They have been taken away. All they are feeding us is a kind of meat which is treated in some way and dries our throats. The thirst is terrible. It will not be long before we are forced to succumb and reveal where the water is. If only to ensure our survival.

  Before this happened we had been returning to the sacred rockhole. It is the only place where there is always water. In the dry it is our last refuge. The area has always been protected for times such as those we have just experienced. It is there that we put our food in storage. There is also shade. We do not disturb the trees in the area nor cut the wood for our fires. We hollow out shallow holes beneath the trees and wait out the heat of the day there. The rockhole is our lifeline in difficult times and when there is no other source of sustenance. It is not only a sanctuary for us but also for our animal totems. There they wait at the waters, just as we do, for the rains to return. Once they come, as they just have, we then spread out again like the budgerigar across the land. Until then we conserve our energy. The sacred waters must be protected at all costs for man and beast alike.

  Now that they have taken us with them we are obliged to find water for them, but we dare not lead them to these sacred waters. Our only hope is that they will be satisfied with what we give them and then leave us in peace. I fear this will not be the case. The invaders never seem to be completely satisfied. I am not alone with this feeling. We all fear that once they have what they want they will kill us all. If only to conceal what they have done. We are like vermin to them. We are only useful for specific things and then thrown away afterwards. In our culture we have a mutual understanding. We don’t own anything; it is for all of us. What we have we share. The land gives us these things. It is a valuable gift. It is not for us to say who should possess them. What is now being done is an extremely dishonourable thing. Even the invaders must understand this. Yet they are driven by something else. A desire to be the sole owner of something. They are blinded by these desires. It takes them over and they can only see what they can gain for themselves. They take and give nothing in return. We would never do that. If we were to live this way we would not survive. We understand the lore: that without fair trade and interaction, all of us will suffer. Not just our own people but everyone, the invaders included. Right now we can do very little to change their attitude. They are bent only on attaining the goal they see directly before their eyes. They don’t understand that what they do in the short term will have devastating effects in the time to come. They don’t see the repercussions of their actions. If they take the water and make it unavailable to all then the water itself will eventually stop flowing. Then we will all have to go without.

  Above all I am shocked and distressed at how quickly this is happening. The changes have been too substantial and too rapid. It is beyond comprehension. We are very adaptable. The land has taught us this. Yet this goes far beyond the land alone. I have a responsibility to care for my family. I need to protect my wife and children. I cannot do that from where I am now. My wife is with child at this very moment. I fear for them as I fear for myself. As a child I saw
what the invaders are truly capable of. I remember well the day they swept through our camp and slaughtered my mothers, sisters and brothers. All our men lost someone that day. Thankfully I survived that ordeal by hiding myself. My own sons are not yet men. I must return to them and finish their training. They still have some way to go. They will need my knowledge to survive. My family is the one thing above all others that drives me to find a way out of this situation. I am certain I can escape the invaders once again. After all, I have done it before. There are no guarantees, though. We have been secretly communicating in sign language and have begun to formulate a plan. Only the bindings stand in our way. We are staying alert and hoping that an opportunity will arise. I will not let these pale demons send me to the spirit world. It is not a good day to die.

  9

  Back to the Community

  Doris

  Billy had just stepped out of the shower. He had never felt so clean in his entire life. His last shower had been just before going to his buck’s party and this was his first serious attempt at cleanliness since then. It had been a huge relief to peel off his clothes and get totally naked. He hadn’t thought that just standing under a steady flow of water could be so uplifting. In the backyard Doug had told him how traditionally they had never washed with water. It was much too precious. They had used smoke. Billy decided that there were some things he could do without but a refreshing shower wasn’t one of them. When he eventually finished showering he felt like a new man and was firm in the opinion that smoke just couldn’t equate to water. The supply of hot water hadn’t lasted very long, though, before it had plummeted in temperature. This hadn’t deterred him and he had let the cold water flow over him until shivering had set in. He had stepped out only when the clattering of his teeth had begun to strain his jaw.

  He stood dripping on the tiled floor with his eyes closed and waited until the heat of his surroundings began to elevate his body temperature. Eventually he stopped shaking. Only then did he open his eyes. Looking down at his naked body he decided his first task should be to search for a new set of underwear. Rob had lent him some clothing but underwear was one item which Billy considered should remain exclusive to the individual who wore it. He didn’t feel it was the sort of thing you shared. Pangs of hunger suddenly pierced his stomach. Food, as usual, was his first concern. He relegated the search for fresh underwear to a minor priority and decided to go without it for the time being. He added it to the mental list of problems he still had to solve. He dressed himself and set about scraping something together to eat. From previous experience he knew the cabin had nothing to offer. He made up his mind to see if he could find something appetising at the general store.

  Upon stepping out of the cabin Billy was enveloped by a cacophony of noise. It was early morning and thousands of birds were heralding the day. The bush had come alive. Billy marvelled at the sound. On exiting the cabin on his first morning, everything had seemed so dry and lifeless. It was as if without the scorching, midday rays of the sun everything had come out of hiding and felt free to express itself. The noise represented life itself. It was certainly thriving here. He stopped and listened, letting the warbling and chattering flow over him. It was invigorating. It gave him energy.

  The ground beneath his sneakers was still cold from the night before and a chill rose up his legs. A crisp breeze played over his skin, making the hairs on his arms stand up. He stepped forward into a corridor of sunshine which was cutting its way between the cabins. He turned his face towards the light source. Its brightness made him squint but it failed to provide much warmth. It had yet to make its impression on the day. He rubbed and shook his arms. He jumped up and down on the spot. His blood began to circulate but he wasn’t rewarded with an elevation in body temperature. He blew warm air into the palms of his hands, checked his bearings and moved off towards the shop.

  Billy strode immediately to the rear of the store and stood in front of the freezers, whereupon he lost his momentum. He stared at the glass doors and was once again racked by thoughts of his predicament. He wasn’t entirely sure why he had come back to the community or what he was going to do with his time there. He watched the icy water running in rivulets down the inside of the doors. At least the water had a purpose, he mused. It was going somewhere, even if it only ended up in a puddle gathering at the bottom of the freezer. Every droplet would find its way there eventually. Compared to him, the droplets had it all sorted out. They at least knew where they were going. He, on the other hand, felt no nearer his target. Whatever that was.

  He stood deep in thought for a time, mulling over his situation and gazing glassy eyed at the freezers. After a moment he pushed the thoughts aside. He shook his head, trying to clear them from his consciousness. He didn’t have any answers and it was pointless to get bogged down. He brought his eyes into focus and took a closer look at his reflection in the glass. The swelling on his face had subsided. Before stepping into the shower he had removed his bandages and hadn’t bothered to replace them. He pressed his index finger gently around the wound on his forehead. It still hurt. At least now it looked better than it felt. He guessed it would take a few days before it completely cleared up. He was pretty sure he wouldn’t have any permanent scarring.

  ‘Did you find it?’

  ‘Wuh?’

  ‘Your way home.’

  Billy spun around. Doris stood a few steps away with a smile upon her face.

  ‘No. Not yet.’

  Doris scrutinised his face.

  ‘Looks like you’ve been in the wars.’

  Billy dropped his hand self-consciously from his forehead.

  ‘You might say that.’

  ‘Yeah, you need to be bit careful with those fellas in Alice.’

  ‘You heard what happened?’

  ‘A little bit. Mabel told me. Don’t really need to know the details, though. It’s one reason we keep it dry around here. The grog has done a lot of damage in the past.’

  Billy nodded solemnly.

  So, have you decided what y’ gonna do?’

  ‘Ahem, no.’

  ‘Maybe you should hook up with some of the boys. You already seem to be getting on pretty well with Rob. They can show you around and we can always use a bit of help around here. We’ve also got a bit of a cattle station which needs managing. Maybe you can help out with that.’

  Billy was indeed getting to know Rob and realised he at least had a starting point. The idea of working a cattle farm was completely foreign to him, though, and he assumed he would require some basic stockman experience. He also cringed when he remembered their laughing at the announcement that he was an accountant and didn’t think they would have much faith in his rural abilities.

  ‘Don’t know that I’ll be much good doing that. Can’t say that I’ve ever been on horse and I can’t speak cow.’

  ‘No worries. I’m sure you’ll pick it up. You got this far, didn’t you?’

  Yes, thought Billy. He had made some progress. He was capable of adapting to something new. Doris’s words buoyed his confidence. He took a deep breath and puffed out his chest.

  ‘Yeah, you’re right.’

  Doris’s face lit up watching Billy’s posture change.

  ‘Tell you what, if you ever just wanna chat, you come and see me. I’m in the house at the end of the street and my door is always open.’

  Billy smiled in gratitude.

  ‘Maybe you should just start by getting your bearings a bit. If you go behind the big hall out back of the shop here, you’ll find a path. If you follow it, it’ll take you up the hill behind the town. There’s a great view from up there.’

  ‘Thanks, I’ll do that.’

  ‘And once you’re up there, you can follow the path a bit further. It leads to a little waterhole. It’s kind of a sacred place for us. I don’t have time today but maybe later in the week I can show you around up there. One of the boys can do it too, of course.’

  ‘That would be great.’

 
; ‘Good. Like I said, I’ve got some things to do. Gonna have to be getting off. You have fun exploring, ok?’

  Billy felt the urge to shake her hand, or perhaps even give her a hug. He was so grateful to have some purpose again. He had to stop himself. He barely knew the woman. He settled for a broad smile and a nod. ‘Thanks, I will.’

  Doris walked down the aisle towards the cash register. Billy quickly scoured the shop for some basic supplies, eventually settling on some eggs and bread. He would make himself a decent breakfast and then follow Doris’s advice and climb the hill. He completely forgot about his underwear situation. After paying for his shopping he stepped out into the street. Looking to his right and down towards the end he saw a well-maintained house with a collection of flowering shrubs in front of it. Doris was climbing the stairs onto its verandah. She turned, saw him standing there and gave him a friendly wave. He overzealously returned the gesture and then felt self-conscious that he was being a little too enthusiastic. She acknowledged his wave and gestured up and towards his right. Billy turned back and looked where she was indicating. A hill rose steeply behind the shop. He looked back down the street to thank Doris but she had already gone into her house. He shrugged and with a renewed lightness in his stride made his way back to the cabin.

  The Rockhole

  Billy wandered up the hill behind the town. The dirt road narrowed until it became a small track, only wide enough for one person to traverse. The bush on either side closed in around him and blocked his view of the surrounding landscape. Slowly the track became steeper and he was climbing up, away from the desert floor. At some point the scrub thinned out and was gradually replaced with rock. Billy stopped for a moment to catch his breath. He was glad he had made himself a decent meal. The exertion of the climb was starting to sap his energy. He turned and looked behind him. He could now see the town in its entirety below him. It was incredibly small. A jumble of little white houses, their corrugated-iron roofs glinting in the sun. He could make out the main street, carving its way through the centre of the town before coming to an abrupt halt at a house to his right, on the edge of the town. Doris’s dwelling. To his left it exited the town and stretched in a straight line away from him and far into the distance before being swallowed up by the bush. He now had a better overview of where he was. The town was nestled at the foot of a low mountain range and on the edge of a wide plain. In the distance he could see another line of hills running parallel to those he was presently on. It was as if the town lay in an enormous river bed. A wide, expansive river that stretched almost as far as the eye could see. Billy recalled reading that at one time the centre of Australia had been inundated by an inland sea. Looking at the vista before him he could clearly visualise the whole place under water. The hill he was climbing had perhaps once been a steep river bank. What existed now was another story. Even with the recent heavy rains everything still appeared brown and burnt. It all looked so incredibly dry and shimmered in the merciless heat. He looked down at his feet and was surprised to see wild flowers growing on the side of the track. Their vivid colours sprang out of their dry, brown surroundings. Clearly the rain had penetrated deep enough into the hard soil to provide nourishment for whatever lay beneath. It had revived this new vegetation from its dormant state. He looked out across the plain once more. He squinted. On closer inspection he could make out splashes of colour emerging from the brown palate. The desert was coming to life. Maybe it wasn’t as inhospitable as he had first assumed.

 

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