by Sierra Hill
My breath comes out in short bursts, as if I’ve just done sprints up and down the court during warm ups. Something in my chest pinches tight, squeezing my heart with an angry fist.
“But you know what, Ainsley?”
“What?”
I place a chaste kiss on her forehead. “If none of that ever happened, I may have never met you. I wouldn’t have been at the coffee shop the morning of my court date. And I wouldn’t have run into you again when I was leaving the meeting with my coach the next day. And I wouldn’t have been required to go visit my gramps. Fate intervened and turned my mistake into the best thing that could have ever happened to me. I’m now closer than ever to my grandfather. I’ve met and fallen for the most perfect girl in the world, who I hope will forgive me and give me another chance.”
Ainsley’s hands wrap around my neck and she smiles. Goddamn, that smile is brighter than a thousand suns and warms me more than the arid Arizona heat.
“I do forgive you, Griff. I’m yours if you still want me.”
I scoff like it’s the silliest thing I’ve ever heard and press my lips squarely against hers, taking possession of what I’ve missed for weeks now.
“I’ve never stopped wanting you, Ainsley. You’re all I’ve ever wanted.”
21
Ainsley
Things have definitely changed since my mom and Anika moved to South Dakota two weeks ago. After they moved, I asked Mica if she wanted to move in with me temporarily. She’d been living with one of her aunties in a seedy part of Phoenix, so she was more than happy to get out from under their wings and into a nicer place. I also posted a roommate wanted ad out on the ASU student boards. The likelihood of my mom coming back is less than one percent. But if Anika did return at some point, well, she would just live in the master bedroom with me.
I’ve made sure to call Ani every night and text her daily to make sure everything is okay. She seems quiet and reserved, resigned to the fact that she’s on the move again. I feel hopeless and useless to do anything but lend my ear.
The positive side of having Mica sharing the apartment with me is that she’s a clean freak. She cleans for a living, so our apartment is always spotless. And to be honest, she is quiet as a mouse. Most of the time, unless she’s out in the living area or kitchen when I am home, I don’t even know she’s there.
The same thing probably can’t be said about me, because when I’m home in the evenings, Cade is usually with me. And let’s just say even using loud music to drown out the noise we make together in the bedroom still doesn’t do the trick.
Like now, for instance.
Cade’s sexual appetite cannot be assuaged. This boy – man – is insatiable. Last night when he came over was the first time in days that we’d seen each other. Things got heated and hot within two seconds of him shutting my bedroom door. We’d fucked like bunnies twice last night and fell asleep in each other’s arms.
I’ve been lying awake now for the last ten minutes, the sun just starting to make an appearance through my east facing window. My lids slowly open as I stare at the ceiling above me, the wall of heat from Cade’s naked body pressed tightly against mine. He has his boxers on, but the expanse of his broad, gloriously naked chest gives me lots of dirty ideas. My eyes divert from the boring popcorn ceiling to his very entertaining torso, as they roam over his ridiculously cut abs, which are rising and falling along to the rhythm of his light snoring.
I slide my hand tentatively down along the peaks and valleys of his stomach and sigh. He’s kind of a freak of nature. Golden tan, marble-smooth, and bigger than a freaking…
It’s then I notice the monster has been awakened. And yes, I do call his penis a monster. Because he is a big boy, with big body parts that make my vajajay shout in joy. I swallow thickly, my eyes drinking in the sight below. Urging me to touch and fondle. My mouth even starts to water.
I stare in awe as his cock grows even bigger, poking out through the opening in his cotton boxers. It’s almost become a staring contest between his dick and me. But I have the advantage, because while it has the ‘come hither’ vibe, I’m the one in control. I’m the one who has the pair of hands, the fingers…the mouth…that can do whatever I damn well please with him. As if he knows what I’m thinking, he begins to twitch.
Mind-reading hard-ons. Who knew?
Without looking up at the face of my sleeping giant, I scoot down so my toes hang off the end of the bed and my body sidles up against his legs. The soft hairs on his legs tickle the tips of my breasts and I have to bite my lip to keep from giggling out loud. I make an effort to be stealthy, but I’m practically frothing at the mouth to uncover my treasure.
I still when Cade’s throat rumbles with a loud snore. My body jerks in surprise as I wait to see if he wakes up. He doesn’t. So I continue to act all ‘Agent Provocateur’ allowing my fingertips to score the length of his thigh, beginning at the kneecap and moving up to the edge of his underwear. I wait, wondering if my morning adventure will wake him, smiling when he doesn’t even move a muscle.
Well, one of his muscles moves. Technically, I think it’s an organ, with muscles.
Either way, it’s in really good shape.
My hand continues to move, tracing the outline of his sac through his shorts, cupping it with a gentle squeeze, before moving on to the main attraction. This man and his enormous erection could be the death of me. He makes me want him in every single way. Cade, who started out to be the biggest jerk I’d ever met, has become my friend, my lover, and my confidant. Cade has shown me what it’s like to be cared for. To be respected. To feel cherished. And dare I say it, to be loved.
He’s only told me that he loves me that one time – at the hospital when we were there with Simon, but hasn’t said it again. Yet I know, with every fiber of my being, that he does. And I love him with the same level of certainty.
Raising my head, I shift my body upright, careful not to jostle the bed too much, so my mouth can reach its intended objective. At the first brush of my tongue against the smooth tip of his cock, Cade unconsciously groans in his sleep. I smile, moving up on my heels to get better leverage. I lower my head and slide my tongue around the sweet underside of his shaft. The taste of musk and man overwhelms me and I’m instantly turned on.
Working to finagle his cock out of the confines of his boxers proves to be difficult, so I give up and just pull him out the opening. I wrap my hands around the base and grasp him hard. Cade gives a hungry moan and his hips instinctively jerk off the bed. My eyes fly to his. They are half-lidded with sleep and lust, gazing down at me with fascination. His lips part as if he’s about to say something.
Then he plops his head back down on the pillow and mumbles.
“I thought I was dreaming,” his breath rushes from his lungs. “Fuck, baby. Don’t stop.”
And with that sentiment, I get to work.
Blowjobs have never been my favorite thing to do. In the past, they were mainly done as learning experiences, but were always given half-heartedly. As a medical professional, I tend to get wrapped up in the clinical aspect of the act. There are just some things you just shouldn’t consider when you’re down ‘there’.
However, all thoughts of hygiene fly out the window as I take Cade in. His wide, smooth crown slides into the warmth of my mouth and I begin to suck. I’ve become an expert on how he likes me to handle him. Sucking the tip, using my tongue in that sweet spot, and then running the length of his shaft with the flat of my tongue before sucking him all the way back to my throat always does the trick. And then I do it all over again in the same manner.
It gets him so worked up that he typically only takes a few minutes before he’s shouting out my name. And oh my God, I love that sound.
It's part torture. Part torment. But one hundred percent pure, consuming lust. And it sends me into lethal territory, producing such an overwhelming high that I feel like my body will combust. Not a bad way to go, if you ask me.
My eyes remain clo
sed as I begin to work Cade with my mouth, enjoying the low, deep groans he emits when my tongue hits a certain spot.
“Just like that,” he pants, his hands finding the top of my head, gently exerting pressure and control as he cups my head.
“Mmm.” I give him my moan of agreement, the sound vibrating across his cock. I squeeze his shaft and I hear a roar of approval, his thighs tensing beneath me.
There’s a slight sting at my hairline, as Cade slides a strong hand through my hair, shifting it out of my face and yanking it tight in his grip. And then he’s coming. I look up at his lust-filled face, contorted into a beautiful grimace, his hips halting their movement as he lets out a long, satisfied curse.
“Fuuuck.”
When he finally goes still, I extract him from my mouth with a smile, taking a swipe at the edge of my lips with my fingers. I use this moment to admire him, as a feeling of utter contentment floods through me. He’s all mine.
At least I think he’s all mine. We really haven’t had the ‘talk’ since we’ve gotten back together. I certainly don’t spend every waking moment with him – hardly – so I have to trust him and I assume we are exclusive. But maybe I’m just fooling myself. There’s always some female presence when he’s out and about around campus, or at parties. He’s never given me any reason to doubt him – even the night I showed up at his party to find him wasted with a skank practically on his lap.
We haven’t discussed our relationship status since we got back together, and aside from his grandfather and his mother just the one time, I haven’t met any of his family. Then again, I’ve never introduced him to mine. But there’s not a chance of that now since they’re gone.
A pair of strong arms lifts me up and out of my thoughts, sliding me up the bed so I’m lying on my side facing him.
Cade’s fingers stroke my cheek. “Hey baby, what’s going on? I can practically see your worried thoughts.”
His lips give me a gentle peck on my mouth. “And there is no reason…” Kiss. “For you to be worried…” Kiss. “Because that was the best morning blowjob I’ve ever gotten…” Kiss, kiss, kiss.
I shake my head, one of my hands landing on his solid chest, giving him a playful shove. “One of the best, huh? Just exactly how many morning BJ’s have you had to compare it to, Number 23?”
I always use that nickname when I’m joshing with him. His lips quirk slightly and his cheeks burn bright red. Busted.
And then he blows me away. “There may have been a few, but not been anyone who mattered. None given to me by someone I’m in love with. That I love.”
Well, when he puts it that way…all my insecurity and jealousy vanish. Poof. Like a cloud of marijuana smoke from Lance’s stash. Did I mention his roommate is a pothead?
I feel a rush of…I don’t know what. My stomach shimmies, as if a thousand butterflies just took flight inside my belly. In my chest. Flitting and flapping in waves, floating up into the sky. Bringing me with them.
Part of me is hesitant to accept his love. Resistant. What the hell do I know about love, anyway? I’ve never really seen it in any form until now. Or even felt it.
Before I can get too deep in thought, Cade’s hands land of my hips and he’s slipping them under my ass, flipping me over on my back.
“What are you doing?”
“I can’t have the girl I love worrying about anything,” he states so matter-of-factly, as he lifts his eyes to me while he scoots down the bed. “That just won’t do.”
He begins to place kisses down my stomach, and I shiver under the exquisite feel of his overnight beard growth scraping against my tender skin. But my hand reaches down to cup his cheek to stop him before he goes any further. I might be crazy, but we have to talk. And if I wait until after he makes me lose my mind, I’ll never get up the nerve.
“Cade,” I whisper. “Come back up here.”
The look of confusion is almost comical, as if he can’t believe I’m stopping him from giving me what I know he was about to give me. Yeah, it does seem kind of loony, come to think of it. But if I don’t get things off my chest, I won’t be able to enjoy myself.
Cade doesn’t move at first. “What is it, baby?”
He tries to distract me by placing an open-mouthed kiss between my legs, his fingers playing with the edge of my panties. And believe me – it is oh-so-distracting. My body is in total agreement that he should keep going with that. But my brain, and thoughts, are in complete opposition. I wiggle out from under him and scoot out of his mouth’s reach. With a heavy sigh, he capitulates and throws himself up the bed with a thump. The weight of his massively constructed body sends me airborne for a brief moment and I try to stifle a giggle.
Once we’re both comfortably situated, our bodies still affixed skin to skin, his hand leisurely strumming up and down my side, I decide to lay it all out there.
“Am I the only one, Cade?” I let that question detonate between us.
For a second, I think I’ve put him into an utter panic. His eyes grow wild, something akin to shock visibly exploding in his deep moss greens.
His mouth opens and closes, as if trying to find the words. I’m not quite sure what to make of it. But before I can put any more thought into it, he closes the distance between us, his hand cupping my face, kissing me firmly. Intensely. With purpose. Brooking no argument.
As he pulls away, I open my eyes to see a hint of gold gleaming in his irises.
“Ainsley, are you asking me if we’re monogamous?”
I nod my head. “Yeah.”
He lets out a bite of laughter and I grit my teeth in anxious agony. This whole topic is very uncomfortable, and now I’m kicking myself for bringing it up.
Cade sighs, propping himself up on his elbow and staring intently at me.
“There are very few things I love more than basketball, ya know? Of course I love my mom, and my sisters, and my grandfather…and maybe pizza and beer. But that’s as far as the list went…” I raise my eyebrows.
“Until I met you, Ainsley, basketball was my highest priority. School and family were a distant second. But no one, not even my friends, held as much as my attention as the game…and never any girl before you.”
His hand continues to gently, and sweetly, stroke the skin along the curve of my waist, leaving a heated trail of longing.
“I never thought about my future much. All I knew was that I didn’t want to play in the NBA or European leagues. And I knew that I wanted to one day be part of creating some life-saving medical device. Honestly, outside of that, I never considered how empty my future possibilities would be until I fell in love with you. Maybe I’m rushing things when I tell you this, and I don’t mean to freak you out…but I know, with one hundred percent certainty, that I want you in my future life. What I hope you get from all of this is that there is no one else but you, Ainsley. And the way I see it, baby…you’re stuck with me.”
Cade leans down and places a soft kiss against my exposed shoulder.
I’m a little bewildered by what I’ve just heard. I’m not even quite sure what he means by it all. My life has always been centered on the here and now, dealing with the difficulties of my day-to-day life, just trying to get through each day to make it on to the next. I’ve never been prompted to give voice to what my future might be like.
When you’re raised by a mom with manic episodes of mental illness and chemical dependency problems, you get used to avoiding hopefulness. And that’s what dreaming of the future will do to you. It’ll set you up for the crushing probability that none of what you actually want or dream of will come to fruition.
The corners of his mouth tug up in that knowing smile of his. “So, to be clear, Ainsley. In case you didn’t understand my rambled speech, yes, we are exclusive. There’s been no one else since the day I met you. I’ve not looked at another woman and I have no inclination or desire to. You’re it for me.”
My brain is muzzy, still trying to process what he’s just told me. I smile and
slip my hand around the back of his neck to get him closer as I lean in to whisper in his ear. The scruff on his face tickles my lips and I can’t help but run my tongue along the edge of his jaw.
“Good to know, Number 23. And just so you know, I’m all yours to do whatever you want with.”
Cade promptly goes back to working up an appetite. Breakfast will have to wait.
22
Cade
The first official practice – also known as Midnight Madness – is in a few short hours from now. The moment we’ve all been waiting for since the disappointing end to last season. The beginning of my final college basketball season.
The great thing about our team this year is that with the exception of a few red shirt Freshman that were added, and the three graduated seniors from last year, we are nearly the identical team. Which means we are ready to capitalize on our cohesiveness and prove our greatness to our opponents.
The only problem: Jeremy Munson, one of our junior forwards, just tested positive for anabolic steroids. We are required to undergo a mandatory annual medical evaluation. Under the NCAA drug testing policy, as well as the school’s athlete’s code of conduct, an initial positive test of any steroid, peptide hormone or a diuretic will result in suspension of eligibility to compete in intercollegiate play for one calendar year. So basically, he just fucked his entire junior year season. And he messed up his scholarship, as well as our team’s balance.
Fucking Jeremy.
I’m not all that close to him, since he’s ridden the bench for the last two years. If I had to guess, I’d put money on the fact that he started taking the steroids to beef up and increase his chances of starting. And now the dickweed just screwed everyone over.
