From this vantage point in her life, she felt ashamed of the road she’d taken. Ashamed of the fact that he had died without the two of them ever finding common ground. There was nothing but tragedy in that, in knowing she would never have another chance to make something wrong, right.
Last night, she’d let Cole see some of this. She’d opened the door, and he’d gotten a pretty clear glimpse of the interior. And here was the thing. He hadn’t run screaming into the night.
She opened her eyes now, and the sky lay above her in a ribbon of shimmering blue. And that was the color that best described her today. Bright blue. Just like the sky.
* * *
COLE AND HARRY headed for the marina at just after seven to check on the boat. Cole navigated the hotel’s Jeep convertible along the winding street through town and then hit the slightly wider road that ran beside the ocean.
He glanced at Harry who was resting his head against the back of the seat, dark sunglasses covering his eyes. “You’re awfully quiet this morning.”
“Thinking,” he said.
“About?”
“What else?”
“Women.”
“Women.”
“Any one in particular?”
“Maybe.”
“Margo?”
“I’m a jerk.”
“If you’re making that declaration with respect to the fairer sex, you can hardly expect me to contradict you. You like being a jerk. Isn’t that what keeps you moving on to greener pastures?”
“It used to seem like a really excellent game plan.”
“And it’s no longer excellent?”
“I don’t know.”
Cole let out a low whistle, then shook his head. “I never thought I’d live to see it. The conversion of Harry Smith.”
Harry gave him a look over the rim of his sunglasses.
“I wouldn’t go so far as converted,” he said.
“Slipping, maybe,” Cole said.
“I could throw that one right back at you.”
“That doesn’t mean you’d be right.”
“So how do you explain kissing Kate on the beach last night?”
Cole kept his gaze fixed on the road. “I won’t even ask how you managed to witness that.”
“I took a walk after dinner. Seems like I wasn’t the only one with the idea.”
“It was just a kiss,” he said.
“A long one,” Harry said.
“Did you stay and take notes?”
Harry laughed. “I was going to stay and cheer you on. I mean it’s been what? Two years?”
“I haven’t exactly been keeping track.”
“That’s my job. It’s been two years.”
“Thanks for the reminder.”
“So did it make up for the wait?”
“Harry.”
“Legitimate question.”
He looked out at the ocean, unwilling to let Harry see his face when he answered. “Yeah,” he said. “It made up for it.”
Harry threw a fist straight up. “Well, all right! It’s about time.”
Cole tried not to smile. “You can officially fold up your save-Cole-Hunter-from-himself tent and find someone else to sponsor.”
“Oh, but there’s more fun to be had, I’m sure,” Harry said, grinning.
“I don’t think the fun is going to go anywhere beyond last night,” he said.
Harry’s smile dropped as if Cole had just made off with his favorite pair of Tommy Bahama swimming trunks. “Oh, I get it. One kiss, and you’re done.”
“It’s not what you think, Harry.”
“So what is it then?”
“She’s not what you think,” he said, remembering Kate’s face in the moonlight, his own surprise at hearing her soft confession.
“What you’re saying is she’s not fling material.”
“No,” Cole said, “and in case you hadn’t noticed, neither is Margo.”
“Yeah,” he said. “I already figured that one out.”
“So what’s with your long face this morning?”
“Margo said she’s not chasing me.”
Cole laughed. He couldn’t help it.
“Oh, sure, go ahead and have a good chuckle at my expense.”
“Isn’t that what you want?”
“Yeah,” he said. “’Course, it is.”
“Well?”
“Well. Nobody wants to be thought of as a jerk.”
“Coming from Savannah, I feel sure you’ve heard that old saying, ‘You can’t have your cake and eat it, too’.”
“Once or twice,” he said, giving him a look.
“Come on, Harry,” he said, landing him a sock on the arm. “Where’s your sense of humor? Wasn’t this your game plan?”
“I ’spose,” he conceded without grace.
“But now that you’re out in the middle of the field, you think you might want to change directions.”
“Heck, no,” he said defensively.
“You just don’t want to be a jerk?”
“Right.”
“Right.”
“I’m sure your motives are nothing short of selfless,” he said.
“You’re just full of yourself this morning, aren’t you?” Harry said, failing to hide his disgust. “Amazing what a kiss will do for a man who’s been without for too long.”
Cole shook his head, smiling, and they drove the remaining distance to the marina in silence. He pulled into a parking space, and they got out, then walked the pier to where the Ginny was docked. Two men wearing tank tops and colorful shorts stood beside the boat.
“This your boat?” the taller one asked.
“Yeah,” Cole answered. “Something wrong?”
“Our night watchman heard a noise and found a couple guys on board around 3:00 a.m. He said it seemed like they were looking for something, but they took off as soon as he yelled at them.”
Cole glanced at Harry.
“Again?” Harry said.
“Thanks, guys,” Cole said. “We’ll take a look around.”
Harry started at the bow of the boat. Cole started at the stern. A couple of the doors had holes in them, as if someone had rammed them with a crowbar. Harry came back to report the same of the ones he’d checked out. “This seems a little too suspect to be a coincidence,” he said. “Anything missing?”
“Nothing of mine,” Cole said. His mind zipped from one possibility to another, with nothing remotely plausible coming up as a likely explanation.
The guy from the pier walked on board. “Sorry about the damage,” he said, “but this kind of thing happens a lot. That’s why we have the night watchman, but I guess he didn’t get here in time.”
“You get a lot of break-ins?” Harry asked.
“Unfortunately,” he replied.
“Let’s take one more look around,” Cole said.
“Too bad they didn’t mention that before you left your boat here overnight, huh?” Harry said in a low voice.
“Yeah,” Cole replied. “I doubt it would be a big boon for business.”
They checked out the engine only to discover it had apparently been treated to the same crowbar treatment.
“Looks like we’ll be spending another night,” Cole said.
“Looks like,” Harry agreed.
* * *
KATE AND MARGO ate breakfast together. They’d just gotten the check when Harry walked through the restaurant and over to their table.
“Well, ladies,” he said, planting his palms on the back of an empty chair, “it’s another day of fun and sun at the Ocean Breeze Beach Resort. The Ginny met with another minor setback.”
“What kind of setback?” Margo asked.
“A crowbar with a mission.”
Kate’s stomach plummeted. “What do you mean?”
“Probably just somebody looking for something valuable they can sell,” Harry said.
“Hmm,” she murmured. Since they’d arrived on Tango Island, she’d barel
y let herself think about the money she’d hidden in her hotel room. With a sick feeling, she wondered now if this incident had anything to do with the guys who’d broken onto the boat the night they’d come back from dancing.
“Where is Cole?” she asked.
“He’s working on getting some repairs done.”
“Is there anything we can do to help?”
“I think he’s got it under control. You two up for going to the beach?”
She glanced at Margo, who was doing a poor job of looking disinterested. Kate felt a sudden need to be alone, to let the panic knotted up inside her unravel. “You guys go on. I’m going to run back to my room. I’ll join you in a little while.”
“Are you sure?” Margo asked.
“Positive,” she said.
“Okay,” Harry said, “we’ll save you a chair.”
They headed out of the restaurant, stopping to chat with Lyle and Lily who had just come in. She heard Harry updating them on the boat situation. She decided to go out the back way, following a winding stone walkway to her room, where she let herself inside only to slide down the closed door and put her head on her knees.
What. If.
What if?
The question rang in her ears even as she told herself to get a grip. Could this have something to do with Karl? If it did, she couldn’t imagine that he or whoever he might have hired to find her would have managed to maintain any degree of subtlety at this point. But then she guessed a crowbar didn’t exactly qualify as subtle.
Maybe she should go home.
The thought settled and took root. If there was any possibility that this had something to do with Karl, she couldn’t take a chance that anyone else might get hurt. The very thought made her feel ill.
And then there was last night. Cole and last night, to be specific.
She remembered the two of them sitting side by side, shoulders touching. As hard as she’d tried not to think about him this morning, he was all she’d been able to think about.
It was this reality that cemented her decision. She should go home. Get her life in order. The last thing she needed to do was set herself up for a regretful parting from Cole Hunter. Better to go now before the regret part got more of a foothold than it already had.
This suddenly seemed like the only possible solution. She headed for the closet, pulled out her suitcase and started throwing clothes inside. She’d just finished packing up toiletries and makeup when someone knocked at the door.
“Just a minute,” she called out and then headed across the room with her makeup bag in hand.
She opened it to find Cole standing just outside. “Hi,” he said.
“Hi.” Her voice sounded like a balloon from which the air had just been let out.
“You heard about the boat?”
She nodded. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s all fixable,” he said. “Shouldn’t take that long.”
“Any idea what happened?” she asked.
“The marina said they’ve had a few break-ins recently. Somebody looking for something to sell.”
“Oh,” she said, glancing down at her hands as a surge of something like gratitude welled up inside her. Unlike the last time, there was nothing in his manner to indicate he thought she had anything to do with it.
“What’s that?” he asked, his gaze swinging to the suitcase on her bed.
She didn’t answer for a moment, not sure what to say. “I’m going to head back to Miami, Cole.”
He stared at her, then shook his head. “Why?”
She shrugged and tried to smile. “I don’t know. The last time this happened, you were pretty convinced I had something to do with it—”
A maid wheeled a cart by, threw them both a smile and said good morning in a singsong voice. They both answered back, subdued.
“May I come in?” Cole asked, his gaze direct.
“I should finish up,” she said. “Find out what kind of transportation is available.”
“Kate,” he said. “Please.”
“All right.” She stepped back and let him in.
He crossed the room to stand by the window, looking out at the pool where two young girls took turns off the diving board. “I’m sorry,” he said. “For accusing you before. I was out of line.”
This was the last thing she wanted him to say. He had no idea exactly how in line he was. “You don’t need to apologize,” she answered.
“Yeah,” he said, turning to look at her. “I do.”
“Cole—”
“Let me finish,” he said.
She folded her arms across her chest, sitting down on the edge of a chair and forcing herself to look at him.
“I—” he started, then stopped. “Trusting other people doesn’t come easy for me these days. My wife…our divorce kind of left me in a place I never imagined being. There was a lot of bitterness between us.” He stopped again, and a few moments passed before he spoke. “I have a daughter. Ginny. She was six the last time I saw her. That was two years ago.”
Kate discovered that she’d been holding her breath. She released it in a little whoosh, realizing that he had named his boat after his daughter. “But why?”
“My ex-wife, Pamela, took her and disappeared one day. She left a note saying I should have appreciated them while I had them.”
“Oh. Cole.” She had no idea how to respond to this. There wasn’t a single word that seemed remotely appropriate. “I’m so sorry.”
He looked at her then. “I’ll find her. I won’t stop looking until I do.”
She nodded, suddenly understanding so many things about him.
“I’m telling you this,” he continued, “because I guess I kind of keep a wall around myself. What I’ve just told you isn’t an excuse, but maybe—”
“Don’t,” she said, holding up one hand. “You don’t need to.”
“Yeah,” he said. “I do. Last night—”
He broke off there, and she knew what he was going to say before he said it. After last night, he thought he knew her. That she wasn’t the kind of person who would bring trouble along with her on this vacation. A sudden tidal wave of guilt washed over her. Whether Karl had anything to do with those break-ins or not, she was hardly the person Cole was starting to believe she was.
“I’m sorry about all that,” she said. “I never meant to drag you through my personal history.”
“You didn’t drag me,” he said. “Let me finish what I was going to say.”
She pressed her lips together and waited.
“It’s been a long time since I’ve let anybody get that close. I think maybe seeing the hard stuff in someone else’s life reminded me I’m not the only one trying to get past something difficult. I made a lot of assumptions about you in the beginning, Kate. I owe you an apology for that. I’m sorry.”
At this point, she would have welcomed a sudden opening in the floor. “You don’t owe me anything,” she said, overwhelmed with the urge to come clean, tell him why she’d come on this trip, that she had, like his wife, been on her own mission of revenge.
“Clearly,” he said, “you’re not who I thought you were.”
He watched her with the same look in his eyes she’d glimpsed last night. Only now, it was one more reminder of her own deceit. She stood up, then started folding the clothes on her bed and dropping them into the suitcase.
“Stay, Kate,” he said.
She didn’t look at him. She couldn’t. “I really need to get back.”
“Hey.”
He moved to stand beside her, reaching out and putting a hand on her arm. Something dissolved inside her, and she realized that she had completely deluded herself about what last night had meant to her. Suddenly, she was back in that exact moment where she could gladly shut out every single problem she’d ever created for herself and let herself believe there was only this.
She looked up at him, aware that all of what she felt showed in her eyes. She could not blink it away, dismi
ss it with some flip comment.
He traced a finger along her jaw, the tip coming to rest on her lower lip. Amazing that she’d lived this long without once feeling this way. And she could not imagine how she would ever convince herself that anything short of this would be worth having.
“Kate,” he said, leaning in to kiss her. All the hours since they’d last touched melted away, and she couldn’t remember why ending it before had seemed so imperative.
She put her arms around his neck, finding that they fit just as well now as they had last night. They kissed for a long time, like two people who had just discovered the excitement of it and weren’t about to let it go.
The window off Kate’s bedroom had been left slightly cracked. From outside, she heard the buzz of a lawn mower, laughter from children playing in the pool. She was aware of the world beyond the two of them, and at the same time, what was happening here, between Cole and her, seemed as though it could take up as much space as they would allow it.
In the back of her mind, she realized she’d never felt this way with Karl, not even close. How sad was that? Sadder still, she thought, to know that where love was concerned, the only thing she had to show for her three plus decades of life on this planet was a boatload of regret.
She stepped out of Cole’s arms then, walked to the window and pressed her fingertips to her lips, a little stunned to discover they still throbbed with the feel of him.
“Kate,” he said. “You can’t leave now.”
She wanted to ask him what now meant. Now that they’d shown each other their weaknesses, or at least a portion of them? Or now that they’d discovered this connection with one another? But then it didn’t really matter which now. It was clearer to her than ever that leaving was the wisest choice. “I’m glad I came,” she said, staring out the window so that she didn’t have to look at him. “But this—” She waved her hand in a circle meant to encompass the two of them and what had just happened. “We both know this would be a mistake.”
“Would it?” he asked softly.
“Oh, yes,” she answered in an equally soft voice. “It definitely would.”
“I can guess at your reasons why,” he said. “But why don’t you tell me?”
“Oh, let’s start with the fact that we both have a closet full of loose ends. I don’t think we need to add any more to our collection.”
A Woman with Secrets Page 11
