“A shower” Miranda repeated. “You can have one if you want”.
“What’s a shower?” Leofric asked mystified. Is he pretending to be stupid or is English his second language?
“Where you wash yourself off” Miranda clarified. “Like a bath”.
“Oh a bath” Leofric stressed in recognition. “I’ve been needing to take one of those now that you mention it”. The man reached the counter and looked at the cereal box with opened eyed confusion, picking it up and staring at it intently.
“You’ve had cereal before right?” Miranda quizzed, trying to moderate her question.
Leofric looked at her with bafflement, “no I haven’t”.
Miranda hesitated and then took the box out of his hands, pouring its contents into a bowl until it was full. She then got out some milk and filled the bowl halfway up with the dairy product. Leofric looked at the food with some more bafflement before picking up a spoon and digging into it. He munched down slowly at first but eventually he got into the swing of things and quickly finished off the whole meal. “That’s some good grub” Leofric announced, putting down the bowl and sighing contentedly.
“What do you usually eat for breakfast?” Miranda asked, trying to be tactful with her questions.
“Oh usually I have some hard bread and maybe some cheese” Leofric casually replied. “Maybe some meat if there’s been a feast the night before”.
“Uh huh” Miranda vocalised.
“So you take baths in that room?” Leofric asked, pointing at her bathroom.
“That’s the one” Miranda answered. This guy is so weird I can’t get my head around it. It’s like he can function normally but he has no idea how anything works, like he’s got amnesia or something. Leofric entered the room and looked around, inspecting it closely. “Just turn on the taps” Miranda called out, before putting hands on her mouth. Come on now Mira, he can’t be that ill informed, he has to know how a shower works. Leofric just looked at her bemused and then started fiddling with the taps in the shower. A jet of water flew out and Leofric howled with fright, jumping out of the shower, his eyes ajar. Miranda got into the bathroom and turned the taps so that the stream became less powerful and warmer. “You just get under the water and you let it wash you off” she said. Leofric looked at her like she was some kind of master magician, it was unnerving to say the least. I’m either dealing with a well articulated lunatic or he’s running a long prank on me. Leofric gazed at the shower and a light bulb seemed to go through his head. “I think I understand” he said. “The ways of this city are alien to me but I think I’m learning quickly”.
“Okay good” Miranda replied. “Just remember to towel off when you’re done”.
She closed the door and put her ear against it, inside she heard Leofric sing as he disrobed.
Ten minutes later the door opened up, a clean and relaxed Leofric emerging. “That was far better than any bath I’ve had back home” he declared, swinging his dark blonde hair around.
“Did you use the conditioner?” Miranda asked.
“I would if I knew what that was” Leofric replied, straightening his tunic and checking his boots. Miranda got up and went into the bathroom, the shower was off and all of the towels had been used, all of them dripping wet. I won’t even bother asking him about the deodorant, if he saw my roll on he’d probably think it was a lollipop. She went back into the main room and saw Leofric putting his robes back on and reattaching his belt. She counted at least one sword and two daggers sheathed on that belt, along with a small purse. In normal circumstances, a strange man in her apartment armed to the teeth would have her in the fetal position, these however were not normal circumstances. The sight of her guest’s blades only made her feel inquisitive and intrigued. Everything about him was so off and bizarre but nothing he did suggested he was insane or not in control of his mental processes. Miranda didn’t feel any fear around him and if she even dared to admit it, she even felt a little comforted by his presence.
“There is something I’ve been meaning to ask” Leofric said out loud.
“Yes” Miranda replied.
“Since I’ve been here I’ve had more than one confrontation” Leofric elaborated. “Is there a custom or courtesy that I’m not observing? One that makes me conspicuous to the denizens of this city?”.
“I don’t think so” Miranda replied. “I mean I guess the whole outfit you’re wearing is probably unusual to people”. That and the sword and the whole speaking like a knight from the middle ages. “That’s peculiar” Leofric ruminated. “I’ve seen folk dressed in all manner of clothing since I’ve arrived here, I wouldn’t imagine that I stood out”.
“It does stand out quite a bit” Miranda said.
“Do you know somewhere I could get clothes that would allow me to resemble the locals?” Leofric asked.
“I think I know a place” Miranda responded.
This is so stupid, giving him a place to stay was enough. I should’ve just said goodbye to him and let him go on his way. Instead I’m helping this fantasy role player get a new wardrobe. “This city is like an anthill” Leofric observed, “I’ve never witnessed such commotion before”. This is only Greenwich Village, imagine if he saw Times Square, he’d probably have a heart attack. “We’re nearly there” Miranda announced. She had decided to take Leofric to a clothing retail outlet, despite the fact that it would cut close to her schedule. She was still nervous about the fight the night before and she wanted Leofric to be as inconspicuous as possible. “We’re here” Miranda announced, ambling into a large store at the edge of an intersection. Inside were dozens of clothing racks, and thankfully, only a few people perusing them. She had selected Grigsby’s for a reason, it was close by and it was cheap while still retaining quality. “See anything you like?” she asked Leofric.
“I’ll let you make the decisions” Leofric replied. “You’re the local”. Miranda sighed and led him through the catalogue for the next twenty minutes, Leofric trying on dozens of different items of clothing. At times Miranda had to stifle laughter at seeing the man struggle to put on basic clothes and other times she felt almost a little endeared by the childlike wonder he displayed.
“I like this one” Leofric said as held up a large black coat.
“That’s not exactly conspicuous” Miranda replied.
“Then what about this one?” Leofric inquired holding up a black t shirt with a death metal band’s logo on it.
“I guess that could work” Miranda considered.
“Or this one?” Leofric said holding up a cowboy hat.
Miranda let out a belly laugh, the sight of the medieval dressed man holding up a big, extravagant cowboy hat and asking her if it would be inconspicuous in New York was too much for her.
“I guess that’s a no then” Leofric mentioned.
“Just put on what I chose for you” Miranda encouraged.
Leofric wordlessly picked up a small pile of clothes and walked into a change room. Miranda watched him go with a smile on her face, she could deny it to herself as much as she wanted but she was enjoying this. She’d had more fun choosing clothes with Leofric than she’d had compared to anything else in recent memory. Five minutes later the blonde man came out wearing his new clothes, a plain white t shirt, fitted jeans and a pair of boots. Miranda felt her breath leave her momentarily when she caught sight of him, he looked far more dashing than she had anticipated. “These ‘jeans’ as you call them don’t fit as well as trousers” Leofric declared as he saddled up to Miranda. As he got closer she couldn’t help but notice how well the t shit clung to his toned frame.
“You look great” Miranda said in a Freudian slip.
“Do I now?” Leofric replied.
“You look very inconspicuous I mean” Miranda diverted, trying to do damage control.
Leofric looked down at himself, “well that’s good to know”. He looked up and his pale blue eyes met hers. “I think this is what I’ll go with”. He went back into
the change room and came out with his old clothes, his sword and its sheath included. He pulled out his purse, choosing a small gold coin and giving it to Miranda. “Back in my homeland this could be used to buy a house, here though it doesn’t seem to be worth much at all” he said. “It isn’t much but it’s the best I can do to thank you for your help”.
“Thank you” Miranda said taking the small coin, she didn’t know if it was worth anything but she figured she should keep it anyway. She paid for the clothes and they left, stopping by a cafe for lunch. It was nearly midday but Miranda felt hunger gnawing at her and she wanted to get something to eat before she headed off to her lecture. And if she was honest with herself, she really wanted to extend the time she was having with Leofric, now that she was used to him she was finding him a very pleasant figure to be around. Her usual anxiety and shyness seemed to vanish while she was around him.
“The food in this city is unlike anything back home” Leofric declared as they sat at table in a mostly empty cafe. The server had taken the order and the two of them talked while they waited for their meal. “What kind of food do you have back home?” Miranda asked.
“Bread, cheese, meat, more cheese, bread, bread, bread” Leofric intoned. “Sometimes we have fish though, that’s always a nice surprise”.
“Sounds like a healthy diet” Miranda joked. “No sugars or artificial flavours, I know hippies who idolise that way of life”.
“Well it’s better to eat than not to eat” Leofric declared. “I’ve seen enough hungry winters to be thankful when I have food on my plate”.
“So where exactly do you come from?” Miranda asked.
“Northumbria” Leofric bluntly replied.
“But where is that?” Miranda followed up.
“If I could tell you I would” Leofric answered. “I’m trying to get back there after all”.
A waiter appeared and interrupted their conversation, putting down plates and cups. Miranda had ordered some avocado toast and a tea for herself while Leofric had bacon and eggs with an energy drink.
“Thank you” Miranda said to the waiter.
Leofric tucked into the food with gusto, his table manners were slightly lacking but otherwise Miranda judged them to be adequate. It could have been worse. “Northumbria is one of the seven kingdoms” Leofric said in between mouthfuls.
“And you were a prince?” Miranda asked. “Were you engaged to a princess then?”.
“No” Leofric replied before gulping down his energy drink. “My throne was stolen from me by my uncle. He killed my father and then blamed it on me and had me exiled. It’s up to me to return to Northumbria, kill him and take back my throne”.
“And why didn’t he kill you then?” Miranda questioned. “If you’re the rightful prince, if that isn’t too much to ask”.
“Oh because he needed to keep up the illusion that I was guilty of killing my father” Leofric answered casually. “He was going to blind me before sending me into exile but I freed myself and escaped that fate”.
“And he sent you to New York for your exile” Miranda mentioned. “Of all the places to send you that’s an odd place to choose”.
“There was a portal” Leofric started. “I leapt through it before I was blinded and I woke up here. Why my uncle chose this city I don’t know but considering how lost I am it seems pretty appropriate. Of course it was probably his witches idea and not his own”.
“His witch?” Miranda asked.
“He has a personal witch” Leofric said with a slight grimace. “She’s called Siana and she’s the one who opened the portal that led to this city. My uncle wants to marry her and make her his queen”.
This is like something out of Game Of Thrones. Maybe that’s where he got all of these ideas, he just watched too much television. He’s so articulate and normal but he’s totally wrapped up in these delusions. I mean he carries a sword around for Gods sake. “What about you?” Leofric asked.
“What about me?” Miranda replied.
“What’s your story?” Leofric inquired.
My story” Miranda started hesitantly. “My story is that I was a good student back in Albany so I decided to try my chances and come live in the big city. I enrolled at NYU and took a part time job and since then I’ve been struggling to keep it all together and now I’m talking to a man who thinks he’s Hamlet and carries a sword around”.
“Fair spoken” Leofric said. “Both of us can relate because we both lost our fathers”.
Miranda had a wave of confusion, “I haven’t lost my father”.
“You haven’t?” Leofric replied baffled.
“Yes, I never said my father was dead” Miranda insisted.
“Well I just assumed” Leofric defended awkwardly. “Where I come from it’s unusual for a woman to live without a father or husband you see”.
“My father is alive and well as is my mother” Miranda asserted. “I message them everyday”.
“You’re capable of telepathy?” Leofric said with wide eyes. “You’re versed in the ways of witchcraft?”.
“I send them messages on my phone” Miranda exclaimed, “are you really this clueless?”.
“Phone?” Leofric asked, his expression still stunned.
“This thing” Miranda said pulling out her smartphone.
A smile came to Leofric’s face, “oh those things. I’ve seen those everywhere, I thought people were speaking into them because they were mad. But you’re saying they’re actually for talking to people far away, now I get it”.
“Yeah” Miranda said. “You can talk to people through them no matter how far away”.
“So I could talk to my uncle through one of these” Leofric presumed. “I could talk to the nobles and inform them of what really happened and organise with them!”.
“Do they have phones?” Miranda asked bluntly.
“Well no” Leofric admitted.
“Then you can’t talk to them” Miranda said.
“I should bring these back to Northumbria” Leofric considered.
“Get the hang of showering first and then you can look at having a phone” Miranda replied.
“Would you like to see Northumbria?” Leofric asked.
“I would if I could” Miranda responded.
“I miss it deeply” Leofric stated. “The rolling green fields, the little rivers and ponds, the crisp mornings and the lazy afternoons. This city is full of a great many incredible things but nothing can compare to home. And right now as we speak my uncle is destroying it, corrupting everything around him like a festering tumour. If only my father had seen his brother the way others had”.
“I’ll be honest with you” Miranda said. “I don’t know how to get to Northumbria and I don’t know if it even exists but if you look hard enough I’m sure you’ll find it”.
“Thank you” Leofric solemnly replied. “I’ve taken up far too much of your time and resources, I should get going and continue my quest. If I am ever to take back my throne I shall send a gift to you in gratitude for your aid”.
“I would like that” Miranda said softly.
Leofric and Miranda stood up facing each other and then leaned forward and hugged one another. Miranda felt warm and comfortable in Leofric’s embrace, her hands running down his well built back. They ended the hug and Leofric hefted a backpack onto his back, Miranda had given it to him so he could carry his old clothes with him. His sword stuck out of the backpack but it had been wrapped in foam to disguise its form. “Farewell and good luck” Leofric said, turning and leaving the cafe and going into the street. Miranda watched him go with sadness, despite his oddities she had enjoyed his company and more importantly he had made her feel safe. That man saved my life like it was nothing and now he leaves like it was nothing. Oh Miranda, it’s been a wild two days. She sighed and left the cafe, making her way to the NYU campus. She had a lecture to attend.
The rest of the day passed by in an uneventful blur. She almost fell asleep during the lecture a
nd afterwards she had turned down an offer from Vanessa to go have afternoon coffee with the girls. She couldn’t get Leofric out of her head, his warm smile and inquisitive blue eyes took up her mind’s eye. She wandered around campus for a while, drinking a coffee at a local place while flicking through her phone. She sent off a message to her parents telling them that she was doing fine, she didn’t mention the incident that had occurred the night before. She also received a message from a girl inviting her to a party and asking if she was going to go to the summer ball the following night. Miranda accepted the invite and showed up to the party which was being held in an apartment not far off campus. She stayed there for a few hours, making some clumsy small talk, trying to distract herself. She felt like a dead fish and after a while she made her exit, heading back home. She walked back to her apartment in the waning hours before midnight, her mind troubled and confused. She reached the lobby of her apartment complex and took the lift to the ninth floor. She crossed down the hallway, pulling out her keys and opening the door to her flat. She stepped into the studio, flicked on the lights and then cried out in terror.
A hideous, hunchbacked monster sniffed through her belongings, things strewn all about the apartment. When she cried out it looked up at her, letting out an animal like growl and rushing towards her. She turned to escape but it was too fast, grabbing her and pulling her in. She struggled with all her might, screaming in absolute terror but it was no use, the beast was too strong to resist. The monster pinned her to the floor, before rushing over and closing the door. Miranda got up, running towards the balcony but the creature intercepted her, tackling her to the floor. Miranda let out another wail of fear, struggling as she felt the creature’s thick digits grip her sides. “Quiet human” the beast growled in crude phrasing. Miranda felt silent in shock. The beast can speak! “You no struggle” the beast continued. “Or I eat your fingers”. Miranda shivered in fear and tears ran down her cheeks. The monster grabbed her purse, sifting through its contents while Miranda lay still on her back, petrified beyond all belief. The creature snarled in triumph as it found the gold coin Leofric had given to her. “Where you get this?” it demanded of her. Miranda was too terrified to respond, she just lay on her back as the ogre interrogated her. “Where you get this?!” it roared furiously.
The Prince of Manhattan Page 8
