by Noelle Adams
She was vaguely surprised he remembered that her grandfather had been alive and living in the area when they were kids. “Two years ago.”
“How are your parents doing?”
“They’re good. Both of them are still working at Tech and still always trying to fix up the house. They’ve redone the place about three times since high school.”
He gave an almost wistful smile. “Nice.”
She suddenly remembered that his mother was dead and his father had treated him horribly. She swallowed hard and heard herself asking before she could think it through, “Have you been to see your Dad yet?”
Noah’s soft expression hardened slightly. “No.”
“Are you planning on it?”
“No.”
Her chest ached slightly—for him, not for her. She still remembered how crushed Ginny had been when her father walked out on them and then a few months later married another woman and started having kids.
He’d committed himself to his new family in a way he never had to Noah, Ginny, and their mother. Ginny had cried so much about it as a teenager—how her father had forgotten she’d existed because he evidently preferred a different family.
Noah had never expressed emotion about it in any way, at least not in Emma’s presence. But he must have been just as devastated as Ginny.
“You think I should?” Noah asked, a throaty edge to his soft voice.
“I don’t know,” she said, telling him the truth. “I’ve never dealt with anything like that, so I can’t pretend to know how you feel. I just wonder…”
She was leaning against the side of her car, and he leaned a little closer to her. “You wonder what?”
“He doesn’t deserve a visit from you. That much is clear. But I wonder if you should do it for you.” She swallowed, suddenly filled with emotion that was years old but somehow also utterly new. “You’re a better man than he’ll ever be.”
A deep, almost tender expression transformed his face. “You think so?”
“Of course I do.” She was surprised he could even ask something like that. “Of course you are.”
“I don’t always think so.”
“Well, that just shows you don’t know very much.”
His expression changed again, and it was like something cracked, flooding his face with feeling that looked like tenderness, appreciation, longing.
Her breath caught in her throat as she gazed up at him, and she kept staring as his face lowered slowly toward hers.
She had no conscious thoughts at all—just a wave of pleasure, excitement, emotion—as his lips brushed against hers very lightly.
It wasn’t enough. It wasn’t nearly enough. She pressed her mouth toward his again, and the kiss deepened for just a moment.
She was flushed and breathless and tingling all over when he pulled back, that same soft look in his eyes.
Then she realized what had happened.
She’d kissed Noah Hart, when she was supposed to be on a Man-Fast.
He must have been hit with reality at the same time, because he took an awkward step backward, rubbing his face with both hands.
“Where did…” She had to stop to take a full breath. “Where did that come from?”
“I don’t know,” he said, breathing just as unevenly as she was. “I…wasn’t thinking.”
“Y-yeah.”
“Can we just pretend it didn’t happen?”
Sure. She could just pretend that amazing kiss—the best kiss she’d ever had—had never happened. It was already forgotten. It would never cross her mind again.
She cleared her throat. “Yeah. We better just forget about it. It was… a mistake.”
“Yeah. Let’s just forget about it.” Noah looked tense and uncomfortable and very strange, but he wasn’t soft and affectionate any more, and he obviously had no further desire to kiss her.
It was probably just a random response to his emotions in confiding to her about his father.
Unless his feelings for her had totally changed.
“Is that all right, Pudge?” he prompted.
Pudge.
His feelings for her had clearly not changed. It was just one of those things that happened.
She gave him a cool smile. “It’s fine. It’s already forgotten.”
Four
A few days later, Emma was sitting in Tea for Two after work, watching her friends make some last-minute touches to the décor. They were debating how quaint they could be without getting fussy. Carol supported very quaint, while Ginny preferred a simpler style.
Emma was doing her best to stay out of the argument.
Patrick was still in the office, but Ryan had stopped by to check out the shop and make the occasional teasing comment. He was big and handsome and had the same reddish brown hair as Carol. Emma had known him most of her life and loved him like another brother.
“The ribbon is too much,” Ginny said, her eyebrows shooting up as she came into the main room from the back and saw that Carol was threading some thick lacy ribbon through the curlicues on the big tea shelf.
“No, it’s not. It’s pretty.” Carol stepped back to admire her handiwork.
“Please tell her it’s too much,” Ginny begged, looking over to the table where Emma and Ryan were sitting and drinking a new White Peony tea that Carol wanted to try before putting it out for sale.
Emma met Ryan’s eyes, and they shared a conspiratorial smile.
“I could go either way,” Emma said.
“Yep.” Ryan nodded with exaggerated vigor. “Either way.”
Ginny rolled her eyes and walked over to give Ryan a sharp poke on the shoulder. “Tell her the truth, doofus.”
Ryan looked momentarily torn, since Carol was glaring at him too. But evidently the truth won out over loyalty to his sister’s taste. “It’s too much,” he admitted. “You’ll never get guys in here if it’s all girlified.”
“What’s girlified?” a new voice came from the doorway.
Noah had just walked in, and Emma’s whole body gave a little clench. He’d finally gotten his luggage at the end of last week, so he was wearing his normal clothes. A little more professional than he’d been lately in black trousers and a charcoal gray dress shirt.
He looked sleek and sexy and expensive, and it was enough to make Emma gulp.
Noah had evidently taken his assessment of the new decoration because his eyebrows went high. Before anyone could answer, he said, “Oh, no, that ribbon is way too much.”
“Ha!” Ginny said victoriously. “I told you! Both my brother and your brother agree. Please take it down.”
Carol put on a pout, although she was already removing the ribbon. “Fine. Patrick needs to be here. He’d agree with me.”
Emma chuckled. “Do you want to bet?”
“No. Not really. I thought it was pretty.”
“It was pretty, but maybe too pretty for everyone’s taste.” Emma was trying to be nice, but the shelves looked far better without the fussy ribbon. She was glad to see it go.
“Why are you all dressed up?” Ginny asked, peering at her brother as he sat down at the table next to Ryan and Emma.
“I video-conferenced a meeting,” he said. “They don’t appreciate it if I show up in my pajamas.” He glanced over at Emma, but his gaze didn’t linger.
There was no sign in his demeanor that they’d kissed on Saturday. She wondered if he even remembered.
She sure wished she could forget, but it kept coming back to her every night when she closed her eyes.
And every morning when she opened them.
“How’s the Man-Fast going?” Ryan asked, when Carol and Ginny started discussing what to display on the front counter.
Emma felt her cheeks warm—not at Ryan’s question but at the fact that Noah was hearing it.
“It’s fine,” she murmured, hoping he’d drop the subject.
“What’s this?” Noah asked, turning around.
“She’s on a Man-Fast
,” Ryan explained, his mouth turned up in a suppressed amusement that was part of his nature. “Hasn’t she told you?”
“A Man-Fast?” Noah’s eyebrows were sky-high again.
“It’s no big deal,” she mumbled.
“Six months without men—to teach her how not to be attracted to assholes. I’ll be impressed if she can do it.” Ryan was smiling at her with the teasing affection he always used.
“Are you attracted to assholes?” Noah asked her.
She didn’t know what to say to that, but she didn’t have to. Ryan answered for her. “You should see the string of guys always hanging around her. I’m always having to swat them away like flies.” He grinned as he reached over to flick her chin slightly. “Sorry. Am I embarrassing you?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “No. You’re annoying me. Go away.”
Ryan laughed and got up. “See how she treats me?” He strolled over toward Ginny and Carol.
Emma should have thought things through before she got rid of Ryan because now she was alone with Noah.
He was still watching her, and a slight coolness had entered his eyes as he glanced over to Ryan walking away.
“Does Patrick know he flirts with you like that?” he asked with a frown.
Her shoulders stiffened at the presumption of the question. “Does Patrick know that you kissed me on Saturday?” she whispered indignantly.
Noah’s face went still. “I thought we were going to forget about that.”
“We are.”
“Then don’t bring it up again.”
“Then don’t try to interfere in my life.”
Noah’s frown had deepened. “So you like Ryan flirting with you like that?”
“He’s not flirting.”
“Uh, I’m not blind, you know. That was definitely flirting.”
She made a soft, exasperated sound. “He flirts with everyone female. It doesn’t mean anything. Don’t you dare say anything to Patrick about it. It’s not your business.”
“He doesn’t flirt with Ginny like that.”
Ryan didn’t flirt with Ginny. Emma had noticed it herself. She had no idea why, since Ginny was quite a flirt herself, unless maybe it had something to do with the fact that they’d gone out for a while in college. But Emma knew Ryan’s flirting with her didn’t mean anything. She would have worried if he hadn’t, since it seemed to be how he expressed affection.
She wasn’t going to bring all that up with Noah right now, however. She asked coolly, “How would you know? How often have you seen Ryan around Ginny in the last seven years?”
The answer was almost never—not until a week ago.
Noah was still frowning, like he was silently bristling, but he didn’t pursue the subject. Instead, he asked in a different tone, “So you’re really on a Man-Fast?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
She was feeling very uncomfortable—like Noah could see into her soul and discover all kinds of things there she didn’t want him to know. Plus, he was looking way too sexy, leaning back in his chair in his expensive, sophisticated clothes.
If she didn’t end this conversation too, she was going to reveal something truly mortifying about how she was still thinking about him.
So she said, “I’m on a Man-Fast so that I don’t kiss any more assholes.”
As soon as she’d said the words, she heard how they sounded, and she saw an expression flicker across Noah’s face.
“I’m sorry,” she said in a rush. “That wasn’t nice. I didn’t really mean you.”
“Yes, you did.” He sighed and stared out at the sidewalk through the front window. A group of college students were walking by, carrying backpacks. “And the truth is, you’re probably right.”
***
On Thursday, they all had lunch at Tea for Two to go over the final plans for the grand opening and celebrate the end of the two-year-long preparations.
It was a good lunch, and things weren’t as awkward between Emma and Noah as she’d feared. They could interact with their friends and smile at each other without obvious tension or undercurrents.
There was tension—at least Emma felt it every time she looked at him. She still wanted to do more than just look at him. But that was inevitable and not the end of the world.
Eventually, she would get over it.
Noah still seemed to have more in his eyes than he ever said out loud, but he clearly wanted to keep all that to himself. She wasn’t going to push. She wasn’t going to assume that they would ever be close—just because she felt that way.
She was going to be a mature, reasonable person and move on from one little kiss.
Things were so fine between them at lunch that she didn’t even worry when she and Noah ended up leaving the shop together. He was going to his car, and she was walking a block over to her office building, so it wasn’t like they were actually together.
She turned back to give him a wave and a friendly goodbye, pleased that she’d felt composed the entire time today—unlike all the other times she’d seen him—when she noticed him standing strangely.
He should be walking, heading to his car, but he wasn’t. He stood perfectly still, staring across the street. Absolutely no emotion was visible on his face, but something was wrong.
She could feel that something was wrong.
“Noah?” she asked, taking a few steps closer to him.
He didn’t reply. She wasn’t sure he even heard her.
She peered across the street, searching for what had caught his attention. It didn’t take long for her to find it.
There was an attractive, middle-aged woman standing on the sidewalk with a shopping bag in one hand and a very expensive designer purse over her shoulder. Emma hadn’t seen her in a while, but she recognized her immediately.
Noah and Ginny’s stepmother. The woman their father had married after he’d walked out on them fifteen years ago.
Emma sucked in a breath and turned back to Noah.
He didn’t look devastated or angry or upset or anything really.
He just looked… empty.
Her chest hurt, and her throat hurt, and she wanted to do something—anything—to mend this wound in his heart, even just a little.
She took his arm. When he didn’t walk with her immediately, she pulled, and she was relieved when he finally fell in step with her.
He didn’t say anything. He didn’t even look at her. But she was glad to at least have gotten him away.
When they reached Nan’s car—a Cadillac in the ugliest shade of green Emma had ever seen, complete with tinted back windows and a gaudy license plate surround—Noah finally shook his head hard and met her eyes. “Sorry,” he said, rubbing his jaw briefly and looking a lot more like himself. “Sorry. I was out of it.”
Emma wasn’t sure if he was going to admit what had thrown him, and she wasn’t going to bring it up if he didn’t. “It’s fine,” she said with a little smile.
His expression changed slightly, softened in that way it sometimes did, the way that made her heart stop for a few seconds. “You saw her, I guess.”
“Yeah.”
He shook his head, more slowly this time, and stared at a spot in the air to his right. “I don’t know why I was surprised. I know they still live in town.”
“Ginny sees them on and off.”
“I know.” His mouth twisted strangely. “I used to hate her so much when I was a kid. I wanted to blame her for taking my dad away.” With a dry little huff, he added, “I didn’t want to hate him.”
Emma couldn’t resist the urge to put a gentle hand on his chest. “That’s got to be normal. He’s your dad.”
“Yeah.” He glanced behind him, back in the direction they’d come from. “She’s just a… a normal woman.”
Emma nodded, not sure what to say, not sure what was happening on Noah’s face.
“And I should really be over this by now,” he added.
“That’s ridiculous. Some
things you just don’t get over—not all the way, I mean. Some things are always going to hurt. This has got to be one of them.”
He was still shaking his head, as if he were mad at himself, as if he didn’t believe an old wound should still have the power to harm him.
Emma had her hand on his chest, and what she really wanted to do was stroke him, caress him, make him feel better.
She dropped her hand.
Noah met her eyes again. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“You know what. Thank you.”
She gave him a small smile. He felt more human to her right now, standing on the sidewalk next to the old car, than he had since he’d been back.
He was older now, but not that much different. He still had such a sensitive soul beneath his cool exterior.
She’d always known that about him. She’d always loved it.
The first day she’d met him—back when they were kids—he’d rescued an injured bird because she’d asked him to. She’d called the bird pudgy, and he’d thought it was such a funny word to use. He’d called her Pudge ever since.
She sighed as she said goodbye and walked back to her office.
Those soft, fond thoughts about him were going to do her no good at all.
Things were already settled between them, and nothing was going to happen.
All that was going to happen was her Man-Fast—and Noah leaving town again.
***
Friday evening was the grand opening of Tea for Two, and Noah was relieved to see that the turnout was really good.
His sister—and Carol and Emma—would all have been crushed if no one had shown up.
They’d done a good job with advertising, though, and they’d also invited everyone they knew. So the shop was packed by eight o’clock, and people were spilling out onto the sidewalk.
Noah hadn’t realized he was nervous about it, but his relief at the success of the opening was palpable. He felt almost giddy with it, and more so when he saw his sister’s happy face.
He would have been having a very good evening if he hadn’t had to watch a bunch of guys hitting on Emma.
That was really getting on his nerves.
She looked absolutely stunning this evening in a little dress that showed a lot of skin. Instead of the more typical black, her dress was white, and for some reason, the fact that it was a little white dress made it seem even sexier than it should have. She wore high heels, and her hair was loose, and she looked so good he got a little hard just watching her.
