by Celia Aaron
“I’m not going to break. That’s the last thing I’ll do.”
Lucius stopped texting again and caught my eye. “I know the heart inside you believes that, but you’re just a person. You’re a body, a mass of organs and muscles and whatever the fuck else Teddy studies in school. Your heart may stay strong, but the rest of you—” He let his gaze slide down my body then back to my eyes. “—doesn’t have the luxury of whatever it is that drives you. Your body can be broken.”
I downed my smoothie and stood, pushing my chair back with a harsh scrape. “I know my limits. Dmitri, you ready?”
He gestured to his half-full plate.
“Fine. I’ll get a head start on stretching. Meet me on the porch when you’re done.” Without giving Lucius another look, I strode through the hall and into the foyer. The chandelier caught the morning sun and sent fractals of light glinting in all directions.
Lucius followed, and it wasn’t long before he grabbed my shoulder. I turned, staring up into his sky blue eyes that never seemed to give me any hint of truth.
“What?”
“Why are you doing this?”
“You know why.” I swiped his arm off my shoulder.
“No. This isn’t for Teddy.” He gripped the collar of my t-shirt and pulled it to the side, getting a look at the bruises along my shoulder from sparring. “You don’t have to run yourself into the ground.”
“Stop.” I shrugged him off.
“No.” He stepped closer and glared down at me. “You’re acting like an idiot.”
“Trying to save your brother’s life is me acting like an idiot?” I tilted my chin up, giving him nothing but disdain.
His jaw tightened, the sinews in his neck thrown in sharp relief. “That’s not what you’re doing.”
I could have fought him. I didn’t. Something about his words disturbed the numbness I’d drawn around myself like a cloak.
He grazed his fingertips up my arm and gripped my chin lightly between his thumb and forefinger. “I know you. I’ve seen you. I…” He paused and leaned closer. “You aren’t mine. It was foolish to think you could ever belong to me. Even so, I don’t want you hurt, self-inflicted or otherwise.” His gaze bored into me, and he let his hand drop to my waist. “Lay off for a day. Please. That’s all I’m asking.”
He was pleading with me as if we were equals, as if he had some say in my life other than the simple illusion of ownership.
I fought the urge to slap him, claw him, make him hurt just so his cries could blot out the turmoil that ruled in my mind. “How many times do you think Gavin or Brianne begged ‘please’ while your friends violated them? Care to hazard a guess?”
He cocked his head. “Is that what this is? Don’t blame yourself for all that, Stella. You didn’t—”
“Shut up!” I exploded, his words like a match to a barrel of gasoline. “You don’t know what we did, what happened. You weren’t there. You didn’t leave Brianne behind. You didn’t send Gavin off alone. You didn’t—” My voice cracked and I quieted.
His expression softened and he put his palm to my cheek. “No. I don’t know. I wasn’t there in the woods. But none of this is your fault.”
“Whose is it, then?” I challenged. “Sin’s? Your mother’s? Whose—”
His phone rang in his pocket. Biting out a curse, he pulled it out and checked the number.
Glad for the reprieve, I sat on the bench by the front door and pulled my shoes on. “I’m training. You can either help or stay out of my way.” I tied my laces, not even looking at Lucius as he answered.
“Yeah. Hang on.” He turned and strode down the hall to Sin’s study. I knew who was on the phone. It was as if I could sense his presence even across the miles separating the two of us.
Dmitri hadn’t emerged from the breakfast room yet. I opened the front door and slammed it shut, though I still stood in the foyer. Then I crept down the hall toward the sound of Lucius’ voice. The runner quieted my steps, and I eased to the closed study door.
“It’s taken care of. I just have to go make a show of negotiating, sign the final contracts, and then I’ll be done… No more than two days.” His voice quieted, as if he were pacing away from me.
I pressed my ear to the door.
“Fine. Well, not fine. I mean she’s training, but she’s not being smart. It’s like she, like she wants it to hurt. I don’t know… Yes. Saturday.” His voice grew nearer and I side stepped, hugging the wall.
“Do you think that’s wise? I fucking don’t.” Lucius voice turned darker. “I’m not telling her shit. You need to sack up. I’ll put her on the phone right now… Coward. You know what this is going to do, right? You know what Stella will… Fine. I know she’s yours. Jesus fucking Christ how many times… Yeah, go fuck yourself, too.” Something crashed, and then the room fell silent.
I slipped back the way I’d come and quietly left the house.
I swam one more lap, pushing myself until the tips of my fingers and toes tingled. Pulling myself up on the edge of the pool, I took in breath after breath. Dmitri lazily swam in circles, floating on his back and keeping an eye on me.
“Running, you okay. Swimming, you good. Fighting, you worst.” He splashed me before flipping under the water so I couldn’t retaliate.
I glanced to the clock above the door leading back into the house. It was time to start setting up for Teddy’s birthday party. He was a grown man, so it wasn’t anything too over-the-top, but a small family to-do was well deserved. Laura spearheaded the cake, and all I had to do was decorate a little and show up.
Dmitri surfaced and began his leisurely circle again.
I rose and wrapped a towel around me. “I’m going in. You coming?”
“Soon.”
“Okay. We’re done for the day, but I’ll need you in the dining—”
“Yes, yes, Teddy’s birthday, Krasivaya. I know. Every woman in house cannot stop talking about that malchik.”
“He’s a good malchik. He deserves a special day. When’s your birthday?” I padded around the pool, leaving wet footprints on the grainy concrete.
“Real men no have birthdays.”
“Here we go again.” I laughed. “We’ll continue this later. See you inside. And put on a happy face for the party.”
“My face always happy.” He frowned.
“Yes, I’m convinced.” I pushed through the side door into the house and took the back stairs up to my room.
After a quick shower, I dressed in jeans and a black, flowy blouse. I dried my hair and applied minimal makeup before heading down to the dining room.
My decorations—a simple happy birthday sign and silly party hats—were laid out on a sideboard. I grabbed the sign and, after a trip to the library for tape, I climbed up on a chair and started to hang the sign over the wide windows.
“This seems familiar. Like the first time we met. Though that time you weren’t wearing so many pesky clothes.”
I glanced over my shoulder at Lucius. “I was standing on the table, not a chair.”
He shrugged, his black polo and jeans giving him a casual but put-together air. “Still a nice view, all the same.”
“Grab the other side and help.” I secured the ‘H’ to the window casing.
Lucius leaned backed against the table and darted his tongue out to his bottom lip. “I prefer to watch.”
“Suit yourself.” I dropped to the ground and pushed my chair to the right before climbing back onto it.
“I still have your panties from that morning.”
My hand faltered and I missed the ‘Y’ with the tape. I tried again and got it pinned.
“That’s gross.” I dropped to the floor and pushed the chair back to the table.
“They smell like you, you know?” He moved around so he stood at my back. “I only had a little taste that night at the cabin, but it was enough… And it wasn’t.”
I turned, the heat in his eyes impossible to miss as his gaze flickered to my lips.
“Lucius, we aren’t doing this. I thought I’d already made that clear. I’m done playing this game with you.”
“You say that now.” He towered over me and ran a finger down my jawline.
Slight tingles rushed through me at his touch. “Stop.” I slapped his hand away.
“We’ll see. You might have a different answer for me later. I can’t wait to hear it.” He gave my lips one last look before he turned and walked toward the hall.
I gave Lucius credit for his single-mindedness, but not much more than that.
Laura pushed through the door from the kitchen and carried a two-layer cake to the table.
“That looks amazing.” I walked over and helped her center it. It was done in a sky blue, with navy piping, and a white doctor’s coat design on the very top.
“You think he’ll like it?”
“He’ll love it. I just don’t know what we’re going to do with all the leftovers.”
She smoothed down her black maid’s uniform. “Well, I was told to make enough for the family and two guests.”
“Guests?” I asked.
“Yes. Those were the orders from Mr. Sinclair. I have to get the hors d'oeuvres set out.” She retreated to the kitchen.
“No, go. That’s fine.” I walked to the powder room off the main hallway and ran my fingers through my hair, just to make sure I looked presentable. After all, company was coming.
CHAPTER THREE
STELLA
THE STEADY RUMBLE OF a motorcycle told me that Teddy had arrived. I peeked out of the music room window and saw his sleek black form cruise down the oak-shrouded lane and into the garage.
“He’s here,” I called, loud enough for Laura and Farns to hear. Excitement welled up inside me. I hoped Teddy would enjoy his sweet surprise.
Glancing back up the drive, a black limo moved slowly toward the house and parked out in front. Luke, the Vinemont driver, got out and opened the back door. A heeled foot hit the ground, and then Luke helped a woman from the rear of the car as Sin exited the other side and came around.
Curiosity turned to something slimy in my gut the moment Sin’s hand touched the small of her back. He led her forward, smiling and gesturing at the house as if he were some sort of salesman. The smile never reached his eyes. His dark gray suit created sharp, masculine lines against his broad shoulders and trim waist, and his dark hair shone in the sun.
The woman was tall and willowy, her long hair cascading down her back in ebony waves. Her sapphire wrap dress accentuated her long legs. She raised her perfectly arched eyebrows at the house, but had a smile for Sin. He led her up the stairs as another car pulled down the drive, the polished metal glinting in the noonday sun.
Farns walked past me as I stood motionless and unseen in the music room. He opened the door and greeted Sin and his guest with a “welcome.” The woman didn’t speak, only walked to the center of the foyer and turned her head back and forth, sizing up the elegance in every fine detail.
She swept her gaze into the music room and narrowed her eyes when they met mine. Something about her was familiar. Not her face, in particular, but her eyes. I’d seen them before, though I couldn’t place where.
Sin walked up beside her and placed his hand at the small of her back again. He followed her gaze and froze, his eyes locking on mine for a split second before he turned away.
“I believe I saw Teddy riding ahead of us. The dining room is this way. If you’d care to freshen up before the lunch, there’s a powder room down and to the left.”
“Thank you, Sin.” She gave him a kiss on the cheek, shot a scowl in my direction, and strode down the hall, her hips swaying with each step.
The door opened again, and Farns gave a stiffer “welcome” than usual. I’d been so preoccupied with Sin and the woman that I’d forgotten about the other car.
A man strode forward, his hand extended. Sin shook, and my breath caught. It was Cal Oakman. I remained still and forced the surge of hate and rage just seeing him brought to the surface back down inside. It wasn’t time yet. Not until Teddy was safe.
“Sophia is freshening up. Shall we go in?” Sin kept his eyes on Cal.
“Sure.” He followed Sin down the hall. “I don’t believe I’ve been here in, what is it, ten years or so? Still looks the same.”
“We try to keep it up as best we can.”
“Well, not everywhere can be the Oakman Estate, especially given your family’s late arrival to the game. Still, it could be worse. You seem to have…”
Their voices faded. I was trapped in ice. The joy at Teddy’s birthday party had been quickly erased by unease. What was going on? Was this another test?
Lucius came down the stairs and turned toward the dining room.
“Lucius,” I hissed.
He changed course and walked to me, his face inscrutable.
“What’s happening?”
“A birthday party. You set it up, remember?” He took my elbow and pulled me along with him into the foyer.
“Why is Cal here?”
“The Sovereign can’t attend birthday parties?”
I stopped at the foot of the stairs, forcing him to stop with me. “Stop playing games. Tell me.”
He lowered his voice. “I just did. Cal wanted to attend Teddy’s birthday party.”
“The woman?”
He couldn’t hide his smirk, not that he would ever try. “That’s Sophia, Sin’s date for the lunch.”
My fingers grew cold, the tips of my ears hot as I digested the information. It was a punch in the gut. It shouldn’t have been. I had no claim on Sin. The entire rulebook these people lived by had as its first and foremost tenet that certain people—like me—were nothing more than chattel. Was she the reason he stayed away?
Our last night together was seared in my memory, but perhaps I had mistaken Sin’s words, his touch, for more than they really were. The thought rang hollow and false. I knew he meant all of it, that he’d given me everything he had. That knowledge was the only thing that had stopped me from seeking him out during his long absence. I trusted him. But he was here with another woman—one who gave me an unsettling sense of familiarity.
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” I glared at him and let the hurt ferment into anger.
He shrugged and snaked his arm around my waist. “I figured it was best for you to see for yourself.”
“This changes nothing between us.” I stepped away from him and eyed the stairs. A retreat seemed like a good idea. Then again, Teddy was more important than any of it.
“We’ll see. Come on. Cal will want to get a look at you.” He took my hand and pulled me with him down the hallway. “And don’t forget what I did to you in the woods.”
I closed my eyes and tried to stop the murky thoughts—the ones that lived in my nightmares—from rising up and taking my sanity away. The woods, the cabin, the screams. Brianne’s and Gavin’s rapes, and my supposed violation by Lucius. He dropped my hand as we entered the room.
“Stella, so nice to see you again.” Cal grinned and walked over, embracing me and running his hands down my back. My skin crawled, and I fought the nausea that rolled through me.
Sin was engaged in a conversation with Sophia and didn’t even look in my direction.
“I’m still sad I missed out on you at the last trial. Maybe I’ll have to arrange a little in-between treat.” Cal whispered in my ear before releasing me.
The kitchen door opened and a grinning Teddy walked in, his cheeks rosy, and Laura in step right behind him. The smile died on his lips when he saw Cal.
“Happy birthday, young man.” Cal skirted the table and shook Teddy’s hand.
Forcing the smile to return to his face, Teddy said, “I didn’t know you’d be coming, Sovereign. It’s an honor.”
“Whoa, look at the manners on this one.” Cal laughed and slapped Laura on the ass as she passed with a serving dish.
Teddy balled his fists but did nothing.
“Sophia, h
ow are you doing these days?” Lucius smiled easily and poured himself a drink at the sideboard.
“Same old, same old, really.” Her voice was low and husky. I’d heard it before. A memory darted along the edges of my mind, but it was gone before I could grasp it.
“Jet-setting as much as you used to?”
“No.” She tossed her hair over her shoulder. It looked effortless enough to be completely calculated. “Daddy didn’t like me spending so much time away. So, I’ve been assigned to the New Orleans office. I still manage to get in a trip to Europe every couple of months, and of course, I spend a great deal of time in New York with Mother.”
Lucius sipped his drink. “We’re glad to have you here for Teddy’s celebration.”
“I wouldn’t miss it.” She scanned my decorations and the cake, her mouth turned down in distaste. “How quaint.”
Laura bustled back in with the final dish and backed away from the table to wait.
“Shall we?” Sin motioned for everyone to sit.
Cal took the head of the table as if it were his house. Sophia stood at his side and waited for Farns to pull her chair out before sitting down. Then Sin sat to her right. I followed Lucius and sat between him and Teddy, still trying to get my bearings on what was happening.
“You seem to have recovered well, Stella.” Cal lay his napkin in his lap as Laura began serving.
“Have I?”
Lucius gripped my knee.
“Yes, you don’t look quite as fresh-faced as you were at the ball, of course, but you are holding up.”
I darted my eyes to Sin. He ignored me and whispered something into Sophia’s ear. They were close, their body language telling me that they knew each other far better than just as friends—the way their shoulders touched, how he nuzzled into her dark hair, and the way she smiled at his every word.
“She’s been a bit more pliant since Christmas, I can tell you that.” Lucius slung his arm around the back of my chair.
“What happened at Christmas?” Teddy asked, his voice quiet and his gaze fixed forward.
