by Lisa Jackson
“But you were the one who left. The man asked you to marry him. You slept with him, packed up your things and left. How would you have felt if the tables were turned?”
“But I told you how necessary it was for me to establish my career before getting involved in a serious relationship.”
“I believe that was your mother’s suggestion,” Maya corrected her.
Alexa’s frown softened. “That’s not fair, Maya.”
“And you think it’s fair to Darius?” Maya asked. “I understand what your mother had gone through, Alexa, but that was her experience. She had no right telling you not to fall in love until a certain age. Love comes when it’s ready. We can’t conjure it up when we think the time is right. Darius loved you. It tore him up when you left. I should know because I was there.
“I’m not saying that you were wrong for not wanting to get serious at a young age, but I think you could have gone about things differently. Bryant and I have been through the fire and the flood and we have managed to stand strong. He’s been supportive of my career, and I support him wanting his own business. If you truly love someone, it’s about give and take. Maybe your father didn’t know much about that, so don’t use that as an excuse with me because I know things can work out especially if it was meant to be.”
With that she slid back from the table and placed her soiled dish in the sink. Alexa remained seated, confused by it all.
Darius was reminded of Alexa’s cognac-colored eyes as he sipped Grand Marnier from the snifter. Regardless of the number of times he replayed the scene in his mind, he couldn’t understand why he had behaved the way he did. All he knew was that seeing Alexa again made him realize how much he had missed her.
She looked the same except more mature. Her eyes still possessed that tranquil, yet smoldering gaze laced with wonder and mystique.
The whole scene, which was blown out of proportion, occurred so fast that the next thing he knew he was leaving. As he climbed up into his truck, he resolved that the years had failed to diminish his feelings for her, and the Alexa he knew possessed the same feelings for him as well.
His love for her was enough to make him happy. When Alexa announced that she was offered a job in Denver, he was sure she’d turn it down especially if he asked her to marry him. When he told his parents of his plans, his mother had asked him to take his time, and his father had left it alone altogether. But Darius was in love, and he wanted to share that with the world.
When he had awakened that morning to an empty bedside, panic hit. Jumping from the bed, he prayed that Alexa was in the shower or maybe preparing their breakfast, but the house was as quiet as ever. In bewilderment, he sank down on the sofa and wondered what could possibly cause her to leave him. The only thing he could think of was his proposal. But, in his mind, he thought that would be the one thing that would draw her nearer, not push her away.
Suddenly, nothing mattered anymore. Not school, not his job, nothing. He probed everyone, Maya, Bryant, even her school counselor about her whereabouts, but no one knew anything. He even went as far as to contact the company Marks-St. Claire, but the receptionist told him in a nasally voice that it was against company policy to reveal personnel information. Empty-handed and heartbroken, he returned to Cleveland.
It was a slow process, but Darius managed to accept what had happened and after a year, stopped devising ways to get Alexa back into his life. He eventually completed his graduate program and accepted a computer analyst position with a reputable software development company. After he deemed himself ready, he began dating again. The women were not hard to come by, and his nights were not often spent alone. Even so, no woman came close to capturing his heart, body and soul like Alexa.
Darius laughed to himself as he raised the snifter to his lips once more. The bartender approached and placed another glass before him.
“Compliments of the cutie in the red, potna,” the bartender announced, nodding towards the door. Darius glanced over his shoulder to the woman sitting all alone. She smiled and raised her glass exposing her cleavage spilling from the black lace camisole. His eyes bucked at her feminine endowment, and she giggled as if she knew he was checking her out.
“Some women need to be arrested for making a man want to sin,” the bartender muttered before walking away.
Darius held up the glass with an unsteady hand and nodded a gesture of thanks. She apparently thought that was a cue for her to come over and she did not hesitate to sashay to his side.
With each step, more leg was exposed in the butt-hugging short skirt. She was throwing so many of her feminine assets around that he could barely concentrate on her face.
“You looked like you could use another,” she announced upon approach.
“Don’t mind if I do,” he replied. If somebody wanted to provide him with the means to distract him from his thoughts then so be it.
“My name’s Cherise.” She held out her hand as she took a seat on the available bar stool.
“Darius,” he said, shaking her hand.
“What brings you here, Mr. Darius?”
He wasn’t sure if he liked the way she sultrily sang his name or the suggestive glances she threw his way.
“Just needed a place to think,” he replied.
“Hmm, you’re thinking on an awfully expensive drink,” she cooed, referring to the sip of cognac remaining in his glass. She motioned for the bartender to send over another.
“Only the best for me,” he replied with a light chuckle.
“Is that so?”
He nodded. “What about you?”
She giggled, more like purred. “I like the best, too, baby, believe me. A couple drinks always relax me.” She raked her long, bloodred nails through her mane and shook it wildly until it fell across her face and down her breast. “I love to let my hair down, and kick my heels up. You know how much fun it is having your heels up, don’t you?”
Darius nodded until he realized what she was hinting around to. “Oh, well, I watch football to relax. Yeah, buddy. There’s nothing like a good football game, throwing that pigskin around.” If he wasn’t so occupied with thinking about Alexa, he would have flirted back, but all he could see were those sexy eyes flashing before his eyes.
“Skin, huh? I like the sound of that.” Cherise laughed. Her hand slid under the table and rested on his knee.
Darius pulled back. He had had too many drinks. This woman wanted to be taken advantage of tonight and he was in the mood to take advantage of someone. But Cherise wasn’t who he was after. The only one he could think about was Alexa.
Cherise rambled on with innuendoes, but Darius did not hear as his thoughts were on Alexa. He felt bad for their earlier encounter and suddenly felt the urge to make things right again. He pulled his wallet from his jacket pocket and removed a twenty-dollar bill.
“Hey, baby, where ya going?” Cherise asked, snagging his jacket and pulling him back.
“I gotta go,” he replied, placing the bill on the bar. He stood. “Thank you for the drink, Ms. Cherise. I apologize for having to dip out on you, but I have business to attend to.”
“Would you like me to join you?” she asked with a look of desperation in her eyes. Curiosity made him wonder about the contents beneath the skimpy clothes, but the idea of enduring Cherise’s company did not appeal to him.
“Thanks, but no thanks.” Before she could utter another word, he departed.
Darius sat outside Bryant and Maya’s home peering up to the window where Alexa slept. He wasn’t sure if she was home, but his drunken state had lowered his inhibitions causing him to act first and think later. He was aware of his actions and justified them by his curiosity. Had he been sober and in his right mind, he was sure he would be somewhere else rather than lurking outside of his friends’ home.
He opened the door of his truck and staggered across the street and up the drive. Digging into his pockets, he retrieved a handful of change, along with his keys and some Tic Tacs. He took
a quarter from the small pile of change and threw it at the window. It hit the stucco frame just beneath the window. He cursed lightly as he caught the glint of the coin spiraling into the brush below.
Digging into his pocket once more, he pulled out a nickel and with his best aim hit the window right on target. He waited for a few minutes but got no response. Searching once more, he tossed up another coin, which made its mark again. He decided that if Alexa didn’t answer this time he would call it quits. When on light came on, he resolved that he was not meant to be there and turned to leave when he heard someone whisper his name in the darkness.
“Darry?”
He turned around to find Alexa standing at a side door dressed in an emerald-green satin robe. “Alexa,” he sighed. Man, was she a sight for sore eyes.
Darius’s immediate reaction was to take her in his arms, but he didn’t want to repeat their earlier encounter by crossing the line.
“Can I come in?”
Alexa paused for a moment then beckoned him inside. “What are you doing out at this time of night?”
“I came to see you,” he replied, stumbling past her.
“Are you drunk?” she asked, catching a whiff of alcohol as he passed by. She turned on the light above the stove.
His eyes widened at the sight of her standing there in the thin wrapper, her feminine curves bringing tempting images to mind.
“I had a little to drink,” he replied as he flopped down on one of the kitchen bar stools.
She crossed her arms before her chest. “Darius, why are you drinking and driving? And more importantly why are you here at this hour?”
He exhaled loudly. “Because I want to apologize to you. I don’t know why I said what I said. No, I know why I said it, but I shouldn’t have, and I’m sorry.”
His attempt at an apology was a little loud and jumbled, so rather than have him waking the whole house and risk having to explain his being there, she ushered him up the stairs to her room for privacy.
The first thing Alexa did when she closed the bedroom door was excuse herself to go to the bathroom. She did not want to give Darius any ideas by lounging around in her robe. She pulled out a pair of boxer shorts and a T-shirt and slipped them on.
As she exited the bathroom, she immediately spotted Darius’s coat and shoes on the floor beside the bed. He, on the other hand, was stretched out on her bed with his hands behind his head staring up at the ceiling. The hem of his fitted T-shirt was raised just enough to expose the downy hairs on his packed abs. Alexa gasped as she remembering the treasure hidden just beyond the band of his jeans.
Darius raised up, catching her by surprise. “Alexa.”
She took a seat on the bulky chair away from the bed. “Yes.”
“I’m really sorry about today,” he started again. Alexa knew it was his alcohol-induced state that caused him to continuously apologize because the Darius she knew was more reserved with his feelings.
“You were wrong for calling me easy. You, more than anybody, know that there is nothing easy about me.”
“I know,” he replied, sitting up.
Alexa’s heart began to beat fast. “Then why did you say something so stupid?”
He paused. “Because I wanted to hurt you. I wanted to see you hurt like I did. I’ve forgiven you, but I know I can’t forget it. You hurt me when you walked out on us.”
“What?” she exclaimed, unsure if she was prepared for what was to come.
“When you left me like you did,” he repeated. He proceeded to go on with a faraway look in his eyes. “Young brother was in love. I would have done anything you asked me to, but you were totally oblivious to my feelings.”
Alexa searched for words to say that would ease his pain, but she couldn’t come up with an excuse that would be fitting.
“You were my world, girl,” he whispered. “How could you end things like you did?”
The topic of conversation was too much and Alexa did not feel like discussing the past. The way she handled the situation was wrong and she realized it, but she wasn’t prepared to discuss it. Not at the moment, anyhow. The last thing she wanted to talk about was what she did wrong because that had been haunting her from day one.
“Look, Darius, it is apparent that you are intoxicated,” she announced, standing. “You are in no condition to discuss serious subject matter.”
Darius shook his head. His movement was so exaggerated that he looked as if he might give himself whiplash. “I may be a little faded, but I’m not incoherent.”
She shrugged. “Okay, how about I don’t want to talk about it.”
Darius looked at her strangely. “Alexa. Don’t you think I deserve to know?”
Rather than respond, she turned away from him, focusing her attention on the dresser before her. The next few days would be hard on both of them. For Alexa, trying to maintain a civil posture would be easy under other circumstances, but if every time she peered over her shoulder to find Darius watching her every move, she would likely falter.
Darius groaned and fell back on the bed.
The sound escaping from his throat caught her attention and she turned to find him stretched out on her bed. “What’s wrong?”
He moaned with a shake of his head. “My head is killing me. Can you get me an aspirin and some water?”
“Sure,” she quickly replied, heading to the bathroom. She located a bottle of Tylenol in the medicine cabinet. She turned on the faucet and filled a Dixie cup with water. When she returned to the bedroom, she found Darius fast asleep. Rather than wake him, she placed the cup and pain reliever on the nightstand.
Although she wanted to leave the room, she couldn’t help remaining in her place watching him sleep. Even in slumber, Darius was a fine piece of art. His sculpted arms and washboard stomach revealed that fitness was one of his priorities. The rise and fall of his chest with each breath, followed by the familiar growl-like snore added to his powerfulness. The slight furrow of his brow caused her to wonder what he was thinking.
It was funny how she couldn’t recall him frowning in his sleep in their younger days. She remembered how much she used to love watching him sleep. He seemed so masculine. His snoring always made her feel secure. Alexa missed that, and the old sinking feeling dwelled in her stomach.
Shaking away the longing like rain off of an umbrella, Alexa made herself walk away. She returned, moments later, only to lay a quilt on top of him before snuggling under one herself on the chair.
As soon as she propped her head against the cushioned padding, she fell fast asleep.
In the middle of the night, Darius awakened to find Alexa curled up on the chair in what looked like an uncomfortable position. He glanced at the alarm clock. It was a few minutes after 2:00 in the morning. He decided he could sleep the alcohol off for another two hours and be gone before the other inhabitants woke up.
Watching Alexa snoring peacefully made Darius determined not to sleep alone. He slipped out of bed and gently picked her up from the chair and carried her over to the bed where he laid her down. After covering her with the comforter, he lay down beside her, on top of the covers, pulling her into his arms. His heart beat like an African drum. He had imagined, actually dreamt about this moment many times. Having Alexa in his arms again felt so right. Like it was where she belonged.
Chapter 4
Just as smoothly as he had come in the night, Darius was gone the next morning. Through blinking eyes, Alexa wondered how she got into the bed. A secretive smile curved the corners of her mouth when she concluded that it was Darius’s doing.
That smile faded when she rolled onto her side and gazed out of the window, realizing the complications she was creating by allowing him to place her in difficult situations. Letting Darius inside the house and into her room could have been a mistake. While she was supposed to be there for Maya, most of her quiet time was spent reflecting on her feelings and past with him.
With a heavy sigh, she closed her eyes once again and a
llowed herself to escape into the past filled with passionate memories that touched her every essence.
Despite her initial reservations, Alexa and Darius hit it off. If there was one thing that she recalled about her relationship with him in comparison to other guys she dated, it was the fact that their personalities were a perfect complement. While Darius was talkative, Alexa was more of a listener. He taught her how to express herself more and she showed him how to listen well. Any tension that was apparent in the beginning had quickly dissolved as they fell into a comfortable place. Everything about their relationship was special, including their first time. Darius was her first lover. And, oh, what a lover he had been, Alexa thought with a smile.
Because she was a virgin, Darius felt it was important that they discuss what she wanted their first time together to be like beforehand.
Alexa took the necessary precautions to prevent pregnancy while Darius concentrated on fulfilling her wishes by making the evening special. When that special night had arrived, Darius fronted some money to Bryant for him and Maya to stay the night at a hotel. Once the apartment was vacated and while Alexa was away, he began to create an evening that his woman would never forget.
Alexa remembered being nervous the whole day. However, when she crossed the threshold of her bedroom, her anxiety dissipated when she saw the care Darius had put into making her first time special.
There were candles all over the room, giving it a warm, inviting glow. Darius had searched through his music collection and made a compilation cassette of the best love songs of the time by great artists of love like the Isley Brothers, Force MD’s, Ready for the World and Luther Vandross. The bed was redressed in white linens and was scattered with rose petals. On the bedside was a small plate containing strawberries, pineapples and chocolate dip along with a bottle of chilled champagne and two glasses.
In the dimness she called out his name.
“Yes, babe,” he responded softly.
She turned to the sound of his voice and blushed at the sight of him standing in the doorway, shirtless, wearing nothing more than a pair of jeans. He reached his hand out for her to come to him and she responded, her heart pounding in her chest like a bass drum. As she slowly moved towards him, she couldn’t help but get caught up in the ambiance that he had created. Once she reached him, Darius pulled her into his embrace. With his hands on her hips, he began swaying her into a slow dance.
