by Janice Ross
COPYRIGHT NOTE
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed “Attention: Permission Request,” at the address below.
[email protected]
© Janice Ross July 2018
Published by Cultural Cocktails
Editing and Formatting by
Cultural Cocktails
Proofreading by
Judy’s Proofreading
Cover Designer: Amarie Avant
Cover Image: Unsplash by Allan Filipe Santos Dias
PUBLISHER’S NOTE
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and events are strictly the product of the author or used fictitiously. Any similarities between actual persons, living or dead, events, settings or locations are entirely coincidental.

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CONTENTS
——————————
Dedication
Book Description
Man Up
Finally
How It All Began
Full Circle
Author’s Note
Sample: Love & Tragedy
Coming Soon
Biography
DEDICATION
——————————
To Him...
DESCRIPTION
——————————
If you’re looking for a story about two perfect people falling in love, you’ve picked the wrong book.
However, if you’d like to read about broken souls making bad choices and somehow finding a happily ever after, then this one’s for you . . .
—
For the past five years, Lucas Akins has been in love with his best friend Shayna Davies. Anyone with eyes could see, even Shayna. Yet she’s been fighting off her own feelings too!
As they attempt to continue a life together as just friends, the universe steps in and forces them to own up to their feelings.
But life is never that easy.
Bad choices and dark secrets filter into their lives to shatter the only real happiness either has ever known. And they are forced into circumstances neither is prepared to take on, though they must; otherwise, love might be lost. Forever . . .
TAUNTED SOULS
—————
MAN UP
——————————
Present
—————
LUCAS
FOR A SECOND, I felt uneasy as hell.
Empty beach, torching moon, and not a damn person to cut into my thoughts. My feet were bare and shirt wide open; the top button of my slacks was unhooked.
I dug my toes into the gritty part of the sand, where branches and shit had been washed ashore. Didn’t matter one way or the other. I stopped at the line of the tide, just so the water could wet the tip of my toes.
The sky was almost a shade of violet and crisp as hell. I inhaled the cool taste of the ocean and exhaled out like a bear. All of this was perfect. It fucking belonged to me alone.
With no one else in sight, I shouted into the sky, “FUCK!”
The wind from the tide rolling in knocked me all over. I wasn’t intimidated. I stood there for about a minute and let the breeze sweep over my soul.
Forming a circle with my mouth, I puffed out and ran my fingers back through my thick, dark brown, layered hair before reaching down to my sides. Everyone always said my chestnut strands matched my eyes. I used to wonder if the darkness didn’t align with my heart. But I’d like to believe that was my past.
Pulling an old iPhone from my pocket, I searched out a name.
Erika.
“Hey?” she answered halfway through the first ring, like she was waiting on me.
“You’re up?” I shoved my left hand into my empty pocket and began scooping up sand with my toes. “I mean, you’re okay?”
She exhaled before saying, “Yeah.” Sounded more weighed down than me.
“What’s on your mind?” I asked. My chest beat like a firestorm. God knows I hoped like hell she was feeling my vibes.
“You’re calling me, what the hell’s on your mind, Lucas?”
At this point, the distance wasn’t the only thing between us. We had unspoken words, unanswered questions, tons of doubt and everything but the damn truth.
“I can’t do this,” I stated. There it was, out in the open.
“Me neither,” she immediately replied.
Shit, did I hear her breathe a sigh of relief?
What the fuck? Without confirming the thing, we both knew exactly what could not be done.
Okay, so that wasn’t quite the answer I was looking for, but I exhaled. Shit! I was holding my breath. Just realized I was fucking holding my breath.
Breathe, man. It’s over.
A smile . . . No, a big-ass grin spread across my face.
“Seriously, Lucas?” Her tone changed. It got sharper. “I don’t know what the hell we were thinking in the first place. This shit between us is not that serious. Lucas, I’m not ready to get married.”
“I know, right.” I laughed and continued to loosen up. This had already been a tense day of checking out properties in Ocean City, Maryland, with my business partners. I’m glad I’d decided to drive back alone because I needed to figure things out.
“What we had was fun, but it’s dead now.” Erika went on and on about everything she always found annoying with me. I soaked it up and let the wind bouncing off of the waves flush over me.
God, I felt free!
“Erika, let me call you back. I need to get ready to head home.”
“Okay, Lucas. Be safe.”
—
My chest contracted as fresh air filled my lungs. I made one more call. This time, the phone rang four times before the voicemail cut in. I hung up and dialed again. After the third ring, she answered.
“Shayna . . .”
“Are you okay, Lucas?” Her voice was groggy.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“You’re fine? You’re calling me at God knows what time, only to tell me you’re fine.”
I laughed.
She giggled.
“I’m sorry. Needed to hear your voice.” How was I supposed to say that I was sorry for my mistakes and fucked-up choices? Besides, how could I prove that I was only hurt and confused. I was only trying to be a decent man? The right words wouldn’t come, so I said what I felt. “I need you.”
“Excuse me.” Her voice got lower, softer until I could imagine her breath tickling my skin. “You need me, Lucas?”
How could she not know? Of course I needed her. It’s always been her. If I’m honest with myself, my heart was never capable of loving another woman. Just her! But for the sake of doing what’s right, I never crossed that line.
“Lucas, I’m going back to bed.”
“No, wait.” I blew into the line. How do I say sorry for being an idiot and still somehow get the girl? How do I make the worst possible choices and expect the perfect girl to forgive me?
Neither one of us said another word. The wind bouncing off of the water kinda sung into the line. I wanted it to do the talking for me. Shit! I was a grown-as
s man and scared like hell of getting rejected by the best woman I’ve ever known.
“What’s going on, Lucas?”
I fumbled. Lost my damn words. “Nothing . . .”
But then . . .
“Excuse me?” A deep male voice came at me fast, followed by shadows and then a light.
I shifted around and got hit by the full effect of a flashlight. “Who the fuck are you?” I blasted.
“So harsh, man!” a different one screamed.
“What you got?” someone tossed out.
I got slammed from behind, but only managed to stumble. Between the light, the wind, and the sand, my vision was all screwed up. All that mattered were the bodies coming at me, as well as male voices trash-talking. So I swung—throwing punches with enough force to knock out one . . . two . . .
But then someone hit me across the back from behind.
“Not much of a badass now, huh?” another one of the bastards screeched.
Couldn’t see much again. Could barely breathe. And the phone flipped out of my hand, along with the keys slipping out of my pocket. I got shoved onto the sand and blinded by shit coming in my eyes. I heard when the assholes picked up my keys and took off. Wouldn’t be too difficult for them to find my truck parked a short distance away.
So, I guess it was gonna be that type of day . . .
—————
SHAYNA
“HELLO! HELLO! LUCAS, what’s going on?”
I heard several voices, but the words were muffled.
“Lucas . . .”
Nothing more than a struggle. More muffled words. The wind. And then complete silence.
I threw off the cover and jumped out of the bed. The room kinda closed in on me. Even though I felt completely disoriented, I gripped the phone like my life was on the line. I tried to pull up his number and call back, but my fingers trembled.
The phone dropped. I reached down to pick it up and try again. This time, I stood straight up and held it with both hands.
“Call Lucas!” I ordered Siri after pushing the button.
“I don’t see Luis in your contacts,” the female voice replied as the screen lit up with the same message.
“Lucas, dammit. Lucas, Siri!” I screamed.
“There’s no need for that,” she threw back at me.
Damn iPhone! Damn Siri!
I prepared to give it one last try, but then the phone vibrated as his name popped up.
“What’s going on, Lucas?” I rushed into the walk-in closet to grab a white, thigh-length robe, only then realizing I only had on a neon lace underwear.
“Some assholes snatched my keys and took off with my truck,” he grunted into the line.
“Are you okay?”
“Am I okay, Shay?” He paused before adding, “Really?”
“Don’t be an asshole, Lucas. I’m looking out for you. Do you need me to come and get you or is someone else taking care of that?” He knew what I meant. Didn’t need to be precise.
“I didn’t call anyone else.”
“Oh . . .”
“I only thought about you.”
I bit my lips together long enough to steady the smile before answering, “You mean they didn’t take your old-ass phone?” I needed a diversion after the last comment.
“Real funny, Shay.”
“Did you call the cops?”
“No. I’m gonna find one while I wait for you to get here.”
“What if I wasn’t available?” I bit the hell out of my lips in anticipation.
“Then I would’ve waited until I got you.”
Though his response brought a smile to my face, I threw out, “For how long, Lucas, because I can’t imagine—”
“As long as it takes,” he cut in.
For once, I felt silenced within my mind. No snarky comebacks. No comments to deflect the looming discomfort. “Send your location.”
“Already sent.”
“On my way.”
I shoved my highlighted strands behind each ear, certain they would unravel and end up in my face all over again. I had to stop, just for a second to gather my thoughts. My lip gloss was nearby; I thought about putting some on, but that might’ve been too much. Then again, my lips always appeared extra red. Probably from biting them all the time. I paused to look at them and reached to flicker on the light switch. My eyes were dark, too dark. For a second, I almost shed a tear. I guess that’s the danger of living in the present with an unresolved past.
Not now, Shay. Now’s not the time to reflect.
I reached into a drawer and pulled out the softest item. Slipping one foot after the other into a pink and blue pair of runner shorts, I thought about Lucas. He had this way of making me feel something. Real feels; deep feels. I knew better than to act on it because he was taken and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.
Yet, there’s nothing . . . I mean absolutely nothing in this world I wouldn’t do for him. He’s always been that kind of friend.
Yeah, that type of guy and so much more.
—————
LUCAS
“AN HOUR AND twenty-thirty minutes! How fast were you driving, Shay?” I asked. My hands gripped the rolled-down window of the driver’s side door.
Darkness surrounded her beautiful face. But I noticed her lips slant as she took her hands off of the steering wheel. My chest pounded when our eyes met. I was ready to say sorry for everything in the past, every damn thing that had ever kept us from getting together. Instead, I only reached in through the driver’s side window and swiped a strand of hair behind her ear.
I literally saw the energy flow from me to her. She yanked away and blew out, “Get in before someone comes after my car.”
I couldn’t move. Honestly, if it wasn’t for the dedication to our friendship and doing the right thing because of Erika, so much would’ve been different now. “I’d take care of you, Shay,” I mouthed.
“Ummm . . . like you took care of yourself earlier, Lucas?” she replied before slipping her lips inside of her mouth.
“You’d be amazed at what a man can do, when he’s got something . . . someone, to fight for, Shay.” I laid my hand over top of hers.
“C’mon, you need to get home and I have a long day ahead of me.”
“Let’s find a spot and talk for a few minutes.” I wanted to let her know about Erika. About the end of my relationship with Erika. But I knew Shayna, she’d want to try and fix things. Shit, there was no fixing something that’s been broken from day one.
“Lucas, either you’ll get in, or I’ll keep going.” She shifted in gear.
The car bucked. Almost in slow motion, our eyes found each other. I’m not talking about a passing glance or any shit like that. Seriously, it’s like we read each other’s mind and everything got calm right then.
“Just get in,” she said, breaking the connection. I knew her well enough to know that those times when we connected like that were probably the scariest ever. I know this because it was the same for me.
After getting in from the passenger side, I asked again, “Back to my first question. How fast?”
“I’m here. I made it.”
“Just trying to look out for you, Shay.”
She shrugged.
An awkward silence filled her car as we turned onto the main road on our way to Route 1. I wanted to slow down time and let her know that things were different now, but I didn’t know how to start it. I hadn’t met Erika that long ago, yet she had taken focus away from Shay. In reality, Shay always tried to push me away. She wanted “Lucas-the friend,” not “Lucas-the boyfriend or lover.”
“I nearly forgot. The police?” She thumbed the wheel. Not once did her eyes move away from the road.
“They took my statement. Got a police report.”
“Good. But I don’t understand how something so random could happen.”
What could I say? Nothing. The truck was a material thing. The guys that had taken it wouldn’t get
too far without me tracking them down. I had connections. Furthermore, my ego might’ve been bruised more than my body. So, I slipped back into the seat. I allowed the breeze to slap at my face and welcomed the silence. In the distance, over in the parking lot for a Dunkin Donuts, a bunch of guys and what appeared to be my black pickup came into view.
“Make a U.”
“Why?”
“Shay, please. Cut over at the next intersection. Not too fast.”
She followed my order, but couldn’t resist asking, “What’s up? Is it the guys? Do you see your truck?”
I kept my mouth shut. As we zoned in on the assholes, I got pissed all over again. For a few seconds, I tapped on the dashboard and pointed out a path for Shay.
“You’re not talking to me,” she gritted out.
I swiped in the air. The last thing I wanted was to be rude or make her feel bad, but this had to be executed just right.
She exhaled and gripped tighter on the wheel. I reached over and ran my fingers down from her elbows until my fingers laid over top of hers. She didn’t flinch. Our breathing aligned. God knows, I wanted to hold her to my chest and pour out my soul.
Not now. Not yet. But soon. Very soon.
When we were close I stated, “Lock the doors. Don’t get out.” I forced my fingers off of hers and started turning for the door.
“I’m not letting you—”
“Listen to me, for once, Shay!” I spun around to gaze into her face. She was chewing the hell out of her scrumptious pink lips. I reached back over to caress her fingers that were wrapped tightly on the wheel. “Step on the gas and hit the bumper. Just enough. I only want to shake them up. And as soon as I get out, lock the door and drop. If shit starts to get ugly, leave.”
She looked at me like she was savoring the words. Her eyes filled with moisture and she finally stopped biting her lips. I wanted to hold her. I wanted to take her in my arms and kiss her, but this sure as hell wasn’t the time.
