by Eva Leon
“I’m going outside. You guys can watch me from the door, but I need to make a private call.”
Caspian didn’t wait for them to answer. He walked outside and stood halfway between the cabin and the waterline. Cas dialed the number and waited for his father to answer.
“Hello,” his father said when he picked up. “Who is this?”
“It’s Caspian. I have some questions for you.”
“Caspian, where are you? You didn’t answer your phone when I tried to call you. I don’t appreciate being ignored. Whose phone are you calling from?” Kris asked.
“I said I had some questions for you. I didn’t say I was calling to answer yours.”
Kris cleared his throat. “Fine. Go ahead.”
Caspian was shocked his father gave up so easily, but he wasn’t about to waste the opportunity. “I want you to tell me about my mother. I know there is something about her, and about me too, that you are keeping from me. I want to know what it is.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kris said, but Caspian could actually hear the lie in his voice.
“Cut the shit. I went swimming in the ocean and my legs turned into a tail. So, did I get that from you or my mother?”
“Caspian,” he said with a sigh. Caspian could almost see his father pinching the bridge of his nose. “I told you to stay away from the ocean. You promised me that you would listen.”
“I know I broke my promise, but I don’t think that’s the point here, Father. The point is that I’m like a mer, like from mermaids mythology, and you didn’t tell me about it. So is it you or is it Mother?”
“It was your mother.”
Caspian was a bit shocked, but he really already knew the answer. “Is that why she’s gone? Don’t lie to me, please.” His voice had softened. Even thought he’d known the truth, hearing it out loud had taken the wind out of his sails.
“I don’t know,” Kris said. “Your mother had always gone for swims. Sometimes she even went for long ones, but she always came back too.”
“So I can learn to control the compulsion to swim out to sea. My mother clearly didn’t fall into some sort of trance and forget to come back all those times. She had control over it.”
“Except the last time, Caspian. The last time your mother went out, she never came back.”
“I don’t want you to worry, but I think I might have an idea why. The ocean has an overwhelming pull. I can feel it whenever I am near the water. I want to learn to control it, and if my mother could, then I know I could too.”
“I wish you hadn’t broken your promise to me, Caspian. If you’d kept it, you could have had a normal life.”
“I don’t think so, Father. I wouldn’t have stayed away from the ocean for my entire life. We both know that. Eventually, I would have found out. At least I am young enough now that I can still learn, and I can enjoy it. The ocean is in my soul, Father. You tried to take that from me. I can forgive you for that because you thought you were doing what was best for me, but I won’t promise you that I’ll stay out of the ocean. I just won’t.”
“Caspian…”
“I love you, Father. I have to go.”
“I love you too…”
“I’ll be in touch.”
“You could still come home and we could forget all about this. You could still have a normal life.”
“Goodbye.”
Caspian hung up the satellite phone before his father could say anything else. When he turned around, Jaden was standing in the doorway watching. He stayed back, but it was obvious to Cas that Jaden heard the conversation.
“Do you think my mother left because of what we are?” Caspian asked, but he didn’t really expect an answer.
He was overwhelmed suddenly, like the wound left by the absence of his mother was ripped open again. Caspian fell to his knees and began to sob openly. He knew it wasn’t a good idea for him to just let his guard down in front of the Alphas he barely knew, but his strength was gone.
This was supposed to have been a vacation. Caspian thought about how he was supposed to be having fun with his friends during one of his last chances to be a carefree teenager. He’d be turning twenty soon and entering the last two years of college. There’d been a job at a lab waiting for him when he got back from the trip, plus mandatory internships for his major. Then he’d move on to being a working graduate student and hopefully, someday, a doctor.
The trip with the other Omegas was the end of being a kid. He’d been ready to embrace adulthood after their final fling, but instead it had been shoved down his throat. Caspian knew he was being childish and stupid crying over the loss of fun, but was it really that selfish?
Before he could ponder it too much, Tate’s hands were under Caspian’s arms lifting him up to his feet. He helped him to the door, where Jaden and Xavier were waiting.
Once Caspian was inside, he could smell pancakes cooking in the cabin’s tiny kitchen. Xavier had hurried back over to the stove to flip them before they burned.
The scent of the cooking pancakes took him back to his grandmother’s kitchen. The smell was familiar and soothing. Caspian’s breathing slowed, and he sank down onto the sofa. Jaden and Tate sat down next to him.
It was quiet in the cabin while Xavier finished cooking breakfast. Cas sobbed on and off for a few minutes. Jaden stroked his hair and Tate held his hand.
Xavier eventually brought him a plate of pancakes slathered in butter. He set the plate down on the wood coffee table and got him a bottle of maple syrup.
“It’s like I’ve lost her all over again,” Caspian said. “Sometimes I wonder if I just wasn’t good enough.”
Chapter Nine
Caspian
In order to distract Caspian from his sorrow, Tate decided they needed to do some experiments with Cas’s shifting. That afternoon, they all went out to the beach and the Alphas watched as Cas made his way to the waterline.
He dipped his toes into the water and watched as the dark skin turned into shiny green scales that reflected pink and blue in the sun. It was just his toes, though. They didn’t begin to turn until the waves lapped over his feet.
Caspian didn’t go any deeper into the water at first. He just stood and observed. He’d expected his feet to fuse together or the change to spread up his legs, but it didn’t. The only sign that he was changing at all were the beautiful scales that had covered his skin.
It wasn’t repulsive in any way. They reminded him of dragon scales. The change made him feel powerful instead of frightened. It was almost as if he could remember a time when he was something more than just an Omega. He felt as if the blood in his veins made him special. Cas didn’t want to tell the Alphas about the feeling. Even though he was turning into... What? A merman? Caspian accepted that was what it was.
Even though he was turning into a merman, he didn’t want to tell the Alphas he felt like he had royal blood running through his veins when he stepped into the water. They’d think he was nuts if he told them he sensed that the ocean was his dominion.
After a while it became obvious the full shift wouldn’t happen with just his feet in the water. He pushed aside the thoughts that he was something more than just an average Omega and walked out until he was up to his thighs in the water.
He felt the tingle shoot up his legs at that depth. It reached his spine, and as much as Caspian wanted to let the change happen, he took a few steps back before he could shift all the way.
“Could one of you get a cup or something?” he called to the Alphas on the beach.
“Be right back,” Xavier said.
Xav ran up to the cabin and disappeared inside. Moments later, he reappeared with a metal coffee mug. Jaden and Tate got closer to the water, and Xavier joined them.
“What did you want the cup for?” Tate asked. He held his hand out, and Xavier handed it to him.
“I wanted to see if pouring the ocean water over my legs triggered the change, or do I have to be submerged?”
“That’s a good idea,” Tate said. “Stand still.”
Caspian was only far enough into the water where his feet had begun the change. Tate scooped up mugs full of the water and poured it over Caspian’s legs. When the change didn’t occur, he worked to scoop and pour the water faster.
Xavier and Jaden joined in, splashing Caspian’s legs with water. No change occurred from the water pouring or the splashing. It became obvious that submersion was needed for Caspian to shift.
“That means he could change in fresh water too,” Tate said thoughtfully. “Maybe he didn’t change in the shower because he wasn’t submerged.”
Caspian thought about it for a moment. He’d never been near the ocean, but he’d been around plenty of ponds and lakes. “The fresh water never called to me the way the ocean did. Besides, I’ve been swimming, and I’m sure my parents or grandparents gave me baths as a baby.”
“You might have changed in the bath and they didn’t say anything about it. Do your grandparents know what you are?” Tate asked. “Maybe the chlorine in the pool kept you from changing.”
“I don’t think my grandparents know,” Caspian said. “My father told them to keep me away from the ocean at all costs, but he told them that was because I nearly drowned on a family vacation.”
“They’re your father’s parents?” Jaden asked.
“Yeah,” Caspian said. “I’ve never met my mother’s parents. She didn’t say much about them. In fact, I can’t recall her ever saying anything about them.”
“That’s probably because they’re out there somewhere,” Xavier said as he studied the horizon.
That thought hadn’t occurred to Caspian at that point. He could have a whole family out there in the ocean somewhere. Cas didn’t think that should explain his mother abandoning her child, but it did just a little bit.
“I don’t think I change in fresh water,” Caspian said. He didn’t want to think about his mother anymore. “At least, it’s not an involuntary thing. Whether it’s something I can will to happen, I’d have to do more experiments.”
“Maybe we can find a pond sometime,” Tate said. “Is there anything around here like that, Xavier?”
“There is. I can show you,” Xav replied.
As he did, a big wave came up and knocked them all over. The retreating water sucked Caspian out until he was fully submerged. The Alphas all caught themselves and stood up, but when they looked around, Caspian was gone.
He’d slipped under the water and had completely forgotten about the shore or the Alphas. There were two large fish darting about, and Caspian chased them. They looked delicious, so he reached out and snatched them.
As he caught the fish, four big, strong hands wrapped around his arms and hauled him out of the water. Xavier and Tate had dived under the water to find Caspian, and they caught him as Caspian got the fish.
Caspian blinked his eyes against the sun as the salty water ran down his face. He was back in the world, and it was utterly terrifying how fast he lost control. With no one to teach him how to wrangle his power, he’d need to stay away from the water unless he was well guarded.
He thought of another option. Caspian wondered if he could swim fast enough to get away from the Alphas. He could just leave. There had to be another life waiting for him in the depths. Why was he holding on to his life on land anyway?
“Cas?” Jaden asked with a chuckle.
The Alpha’s voice brought him out of his escape fantasy. He figured out why Jaden was laughing. The two fish were flapping around trying desperately to get away, but Caspian stood there like a statue, not noticing them.
“Sorry,” Caspian said. “I caught dinner.”
“I’ll take those,” Xavier said. “We can make a fire on the beach and roast them.”
They’d been in the water longer than Caspian realized. The sun was beginning to get low in the sky, and they were all hungry.
Xavier went back to the cabin to clean the fish while Jaden, Tate, and Caspian went looking for firewood. It was almost too perfect. The distraction of picking up sticks and exploring the jungle distracted Caspian from the call of the sea. He remembered why life on land wasn’t bad. There was a great deal to see and explore out of the water. At least that’s what he kept telling himself.
He looked at the trees and flowers with new eyes. It was more than just a new perspective, though. Deep inside Caspian’s mind, he worried it was a goodbye. He wanted to remember what tropical flowers smelled like and he needed to memorize the birdsong before he left that world forever.
Caspian didn’t tell the Alphas he’d begun to think that way. There was very little holding him to life on land, and somehow Tate, Jaden, and Xavier had become the biggest part of that. There was his father and grandparents too, but he knew his father would come to understand. He would explain it to Caspian’s grandparents as well.
No.
Cas shook his head. The decision hadn’t been made, and he needed to stop thinking like it had.
“I think we’ve got enough,” Jaden said. “Let’s go back to the beach and get the fire started. I’m starving.”
Back to the beach. Caspian’s fight to stay out of the ocean would start all over again. He thought perhaps he should tell them of his struggle. Maybe then they would take him somewhere else. Somewhere away from the ocean.
No, that was a terrible idea. Caspian didn’t want to be away from the ocean or the Alphas. He would just have to be strong.
Caspian watched as Xavier roasted the fish. He’d covered them with butter and stuffed the fish with herbs. The scent of the cooking meat made his stomach growl again.
“It’s almost ready,” Xavier said with a sweet smile.
Caspian felt a tug at his heart. It wasn’t something he’d ever felt for an Alpha before. He turned to look at Jaden and Tate who were lost in a deep and very geeky conversation about artificial intelligence, and he felt that tug at his heart again.
Maybe it was just the sound of the ocean or the soft light and warmth of the fire, but Caspian felt at home with these men. Caspian turned to watch the waves. He tried to drown out the song calling him out to sea. Cas wanted more than anything to be able to gaze at his now beloved ocean without feeling the frenzied obsession that had become a regular part of his life.
“Dinner’s ready,” Xavier said.
He passed around the cooked fish and they all ate quietly for a few minutes. With the edge of his hunger gone, Cas had begun to feel more centered.
“You’re really going to need to be more focused when you’re in the water, Caspian,” Jaden said. “If you dive under and swim too deep, we won’t be able to get you. We’re Alphas, but we can still only dive so far without equipment.”
“Maybe we should tag him,” Xavier suggested.
“You mean a GPS tag?” Jaden was intrigued.
“Yeah, like with sharks,” Xav responded.
“I don’t know,” Caspian said. “That seems intrusive.”
“We wouldn’t implant it under your skin or anything. I don’t even have the equipment to do that here,” Xavier said. “But, we could, like, make you a bracelet or something.”
“Do we have a GPS tracker?” Tate asked.
“I have a few in the truck. We use them to tag some of our equipment. They’re small enough to make into a bracelet.”
“Go get it,” Tate said.
“Yeah, and you can use this.” Jaden took a small leather and silver bead bracelet off his wrist and handed it to Xavier.
Xavier went and retrieved a small GPS tracker. Caspian watched as he attached it to the thin leather band. It almost looked like one of the other beads.
“Here,” Xavier said and held it out.
Caspian slid the bracelet over his wrist and used the beads to tighten it. It was pretty, and when he looked up, Jaden was smiling proudly.
“Thank you for the bracelet,” Caspian said to Jaden. “And thank you guys for caring so much about me.”
“We sti
ll don’t know why Conrad wants to capture you, but this way, if you swim off or get taken, we can find you,” Tate said.
After that, Xavier put out the fire and the rest of them cleaned up the beach. It had been a long day, so they all went to bed.
Caspian lay there, staring at the ceiling. Whatever he tried, sleep would not come. He did deep breathing, counted sheep, and tried to meditate. None of it worked.
Eventually, the sound of the waves lapping against the beach filled his ears. Caspian got out of bed as quietly as possible as he stood up. The bed frame made a slight squeaking sound. He froze in place and looked over at the sleeping Alphas.
Jaden stirred a bit, but he didn’t open his eyes. Caspian stayed still until he was sure that all three Alphas were still asleep. Once he was confident that he was alone, he crept out the front door of the cabin.
Caspian walked quickly down the beach to the water’s edge. His breathing quickened at the anticipation of getting into the ocean. He was so excited that he didn’t hear the soft footsteps of someone following.
“Are you running away?”
Caspian whirled around to find Jaden standing behind him. Jaden had woken up when Cas got out of bed, but he’d pretended to go back to sleep.
“Why did you pretend to go back to sleep?” Caspian countered.
“Ah. Answering a question with a question, huh? I believe that means you’re hiding something.”
“I’m not hiding anything. I’m not running away.”
“I guess you wouldn’t be running away. It would be more like swimming. Why do you want to leave us so badly?”
It was then that Caspian realized that he’d hurt Jaden. The Alpha was clearly upset. He believed that Cas was leaving them, and it had affected him more deeply than Caspian expected.
“It’s not that I want to go. The sea calls to me. It’s so hard to ignore it.”
The moonlight reflecting off of Jaden’s tan skin distracted Caspian for a moment. It was the first time that song of the ocean was almost inaudible to him. He bit his bottom lip and allowed his eyes to trace Jaden’s abs.
Caspian’s eyes traveled back up to Jaden’s face and the Alpha licked his lips. Cas felt his cock stir, and unconsciously, his gaze flicked down to Jaden’s crotch. He wanted to know if Jaden felt the same way.
