Blurry: A Student Teacher, Age Gap Romance

by Michelle Hercules

He chuckles. “Okay. I’ll put her back in her cage. I must not have shut the latch properly yesterday.”

  He disappears into another room, returning a moment later. “Shall we?” He points down the stairs.

  “Is it wise? I think your lawyer is about to bite your head off.”

  “Enzo? Nah. He’s only ruthless in court.”

  I follow Alistair downstairs, still feeling unsure of myself. Enzo is in the kitchen, leaning against the counter with a mug of freshly brewed coffee in his hand. His eyes narrow when he looks at me, and I want to run back to the bedroom.

  “When did this happen?” he asks.

  “Does it matter?” Alistair throws his arm over my shoulders and kisses the top of my head.

  Enzo’s eyes seem to shine with understanding. He takes another sip of coffee. “You’re getting good at bullshitting me, Alistair.”

  “I don’t follow,” he says.

  “When I asked you earlier if your decision to settle with Nadine had anything to do with your student, you said no. Now I know that’s not true.”

  Heat rushes to my cheeks, and I drop my gaze. I don’t dare to hope Enzo is speaking the truth.

  “Well, now you know,” Alistair replies.

  “I need coffee,” I blurt, trying to divert the conversation away from me.

  Acting as if the house is his, Enzo grabs another cup and fills it up for me. I step away from Alistair’s embrace, feeling exposed as I do so, but I don’t want to give the impression that I’m a scared mouse, even though I’m quivering inside.

  “Thanks.” I grab the cup, bringing it immediately to my lips to partially hide my face. The most wonderful flavor hits my tongue. I’ve only tasted such divine coffee in Italy. “This is amazing.”

  Enzo shrugs. “It must be the Italian touch. I’m very good at making coffee.”

  “You’re Italian?”

  He chuckles. “Didn’t the name Enzo clue you in? Second-generation Italian-American.”

  I switch to Italian, and Enzo replies. We only exchange a few words before Alistair puts a stop to it.

  “Okay, enough with the secret code language.”

  I giggle, and Enzo rolls his eyes. Alistair was right, he isn’t that intimidating.

  He drinks the last sip of his coffee, then puts the cup back on the counter. “Well, thank you for a very entertaining morning, Alistair. I’ll start the paperwork as soon as I get home. And please, for the love of God, be careful. We don’t want Nadine finding out about you two before she signs the papers.”

  Enzo turns to me, extending his hand. “Nice to meet you….”

  “The name is Chiara,” I say.

  “Nice to meet you, Chiara.”

  We shake hands, and then Enzo claps Alistair’s shoulder before heading out.

  After the lawyer is gone, Alistair pulls me to him and kisses me tenderly. I melt like butter in his arms. This man has so much power over me; it’s a little scary. The kiss doesn’t last long, and when Alistair pulls back, he says, “I’m sorry.”

  “For what?”

  “For Enzo. No one needs to be exposed to him early in the morning.”

  I smirk. “You should be apologizing about the spider.”

  “I’m sorry about that too.”

  “I have to apologize as well.”

  He furrows his brows. “For what?”

  I lower my gaze. “For eavesdropping on your conversation.”

  He places his finger under my chin and lifts my face to his. “That was very naughty of you. I think I have to punish you for that.”

  I should laugh, but instead I ask, “Did you really mean what you said? Does your decision to settle with your ex-wife have anything to do with me?”

  “In part, yes. Does that scare you?”

  I’m scared, yes, but not about that. I’m afraid one day Alistair will get tired of me. I don’t share any of my insecurities with him though. Instead, I say, “No. It makes me happy.”

  “Good. I want to make you happy, Goldi.”

  “I love you, Alistair,” I say despite the deep-rooted fear that I’m not good enough for him.

  I kiss him again, not wanting to hear the sound of his silence. He hasn’t said he loves me, even though he’s done many things that show he cares about me.

  He tangles his fingers in my hair, keeping me in place while his tongue mingles with mine in a slow, sexy dance. I’m so ready to go back to his room, and the bulge pressing against my belly tells me he is too.

  Alistair pulls back and stares into my eyes. “I love you too, Chiara.”

  My breath catches while my heart takes off in a mad race. “You do?”

  “Yes. You have no idea.”

  He crushes his lips against mine, melting my anxiety away.

  34

  Chiara

  I spent the entire weekend with Alistair, which was amazing. In consequence, I can’t walk properly today. The first-period teacher is not in the classroom yet, but Robbie is. I purposely tried not to think about our fight while I was with Alistair, but now it’s all coming back to me. Our gazes lock, and even with the distance, I can read the remorse in his eyes.

  I’m still mad at him, but I choose to be the bigger person and pull out the chair next to his.

  “Hi, Chiara. I’ve called and left you several messages,” he says.

  “I know.”

  “I’m so fucking sorry about that whole mess. Please say you forgive me.”

  “What you did was shitty, Robbie. You could have asked me instead of spying. You know how embarrassing that was?”

  “True. I could have asked, but can you honestly say you’d tell me the truth? Besides, anyone walking by could have heard you. It’s not like you guys were being quiet.”

  Hell, I thought we were.

  “Shhh.” I glance around, afraid others are listening to our conversation, but the classroom isn’t full yet, and the students present aren’t near us.

  “Sorry. I know what I did was bad, but I did you guys a favor. I’d totally cover for you if needed.”

  Cazzo. We were careless that day.

  “All right. I forgive you. Can we please stop talking about it, please?”

  “Sure. Have you thought about—”

  “I’m not going to cover for you,” I grit out.

  “I understand. Phillip wasn’t sold on the idea either.” Robbie shrugs, looking defeated. “He’s sorry for manhandling you.”

  “He didn’t manhandle me.”

  “Well, apparently Mr. Walsh thought otherwise. When Phillip came back, he was as white as a sheet of paper.”

  “Yeah, Alistair wasn’t happy. But it’s all good.”

  Valerie drops in the seat in front of us, forcing our conversation to a stop.

  “Morning, bitches. What’s up?”

  “Not much,” Robbie replies.

  Valerie looks at me. “Were you feeling okay on Sunday?”

  Her question makes me tense because for a moment, I forget that I texted her with an excuse to leave the party early on Saturday.

  “Yeah,” I reply when my brain catches up.

  “I could have taken you home, you know.”

  “I didn’t want to be a pain. You were having fun. It’s not your fault that I can’t handle more than one caipirinha.”

  Valerie snickers. “You’re not the only one who couldn’t handle his alcohol. Josh was pitiful. I’ve never seen him that wasted.”

  The teacher enters the classroom, and we have to put a pin on our conversation. I want to ask about Josh, but that will have to wait until later.

  As the day progresses, I begin to relax. I was worried that someone had seen me leave the party with Alistair. I told Robbie we were cool, but it will take a while for the annoyance to completely go away. We manage to fall back into the easy rapport we had when we first met though.

  But when we bump into Phillip on our way to the cafeteria, things become awkward again, and the reason for our fight comes back to the forefront of my mind
. Phillip looks more sorrowful than Robbie did. Poor guy. It sucks that they can’t be together, and it also breaks my heart.

  “Hey, Chiara. How are you?” Phillips asks, staring at me with a dejected puppy look in his eyes.

  “I’m good. And you?”

  “Good.”

  A moment of uncomfortable silence follows.

  “Oh, for fuck’s sake. Can we just go back to last week when all secrets were still secrets?” Robbi asks, exasperated.

  “Oh, and what secrets would those be, Robbie?” Jillian asks from behind us.

  Crap.

  “Get lost, Jillian,” Robbie retorts.

  “If you don’t want people to know about your depraved ways, you shouldn’t have hookups during a party, Robbie.” She smiles maliciously while glancing at Phillip.

  Robbie rolls his eyes. “Oh, honey. Do you think I care about what people say about my sex life?”

  “Maybe you don’t, but I’m sure Phillip does.” She raises an eyebrow.

  Shit. Did she see Phillip go in Robbie’s room last Saturday?

  I don’t want her venomous tongue to hurt my friends. I step closer to Phillip, looping my arm around his waist.

  “I hardly think making out with my boyfriend in a private room is depraved.”

  Jillian’s eyes go rounder. “You’re dating Phillip?”

  He smiles at me as if I was the object of his affection. “Yep. She captured my heart at first sight.”

  To seal the deal, I cup his cheek, rise on my tiptoes, and place a soft kiss on his lips.

  There. That should be enough to stop this bitch from spreading more gossip.

  I’m smiling when I look at her again, but it’s an effort to keep it up when I see Alistair standing in the hallway, glaring at me.

  ALISTAIR

  It takes every ounce of self-control I have not to stride across the hallway and punch that punk in the face. Jealousy is a dangerous beast, and I can’t claim to be its master. So I do the best I can in this situation—I turn around and walk away.

  I’m seething when I finally enter my office and close the door. Behind my desk, I rest my head in my hands and take deep breaths. That’s what I get for falling for my student. God, I’m such an idiot.

  I should have never restarted things with Chiara. But hell, resisting her was impossible. She got under my skin, left a brand on my heart. I’ve never wanted anyone like I want her. She puts my sex drive on steroids. I’m constantly semihard when she’s around, which is a fucking problem when I’m her teacher.

  I can’t head to my next class in this state, that’s for sure.

  I turn on my laptop, hoping email checking will distract me.

  A knock on my door makes me grind my teeth. I hope she isn’t foolish enough to come see me.

  “Who is it?”

  “It’s Phillip, Mr. Walsh. May I come in?”

  I curl my hands into fists. What is this asshole doing here?

  Damn it. I’m really losing it. Here I am cursing at a student because he likes someone he thinks is available.

  “Yeah, sure.”

  He looks nervous as he steps inside and closes the door. I avoid eye contact because the urge to punch his face is still there, simmering just below my skin.

  “How can I help you, Mr. Harrison?”

  “I want to explain what you saw just now.”

  That gets my attention. “What do you mean?”

  “There’s nothing going on between Chiara and me. She’s just pretending to be my girlfriend to help me out.”

  There’s a loud roar in my ears. I want to yell obscenities, but I have to keep a level head here.

  “I don’t understand how that’s my concern.”

  “Sir, I know about you and Chiara.”

  Damn everything to hell.

  “Excuse me?”

  Phillip raises his hands, palms facing me. “You don’t have to worry, Mr. Walsh. Robbie and I won’t say a word. I swear.”

  “Robbie knows about this?” I grit out, gripping the edge of my desk.

  “Yeah, but you see, we have a secret too. I’m with Robbie. He’s….” Phillip glances down, rubbing his neck. “He’s my boyfriend.”

  Like a balloon deflating, the jealousy whooshes out of me, though not the annoyance. Chiara didn’t tell me any of this.

  “I see. Not that it matters, but I met Chiara before she was a student here. You do understand that if this secret leaks, it will tarnish her reputation, don’t you?”

  My statement seems to surprise him. “What about your reputation? Aren’t you worried about that?”

  “Not as much as I should be.”

  Chiara didn’t show up for writer’s room class. I’m sure Phillip told her about our conversation. I thought not having her there to distract me was a good thing, but it turns out, she doesn’t need to be present to take over my thoughts.

  I’m in the middle of working on next week’s lecture when Enzo calls me. I’ve been waiting to hear from him about the Nadine mess.

  “Hey, man. Please tell me you have good news,” I say.

  “It depends on what you call good news. Nadine’s lawyer finally called back. It seems your ex-wife is not as keen to be rid of you as you are to be rid of her.”

  “What do you mean? What does she want now?”

  “Nothing that will cost you more money, unless you count the five-star meal in a fancy restaurant.”

  “Can you please get to the fucking point?” I pinch the bridge of my nose.

  “She wants to have dinner with you first before she signs anything.”

  “No chance in hell. I can’t sit through an entire dinner with her.”

  “I know it sucks, okay? But do you want her to sign the papers or not? It’s just dinner.”

  I can already imagine Chiara’s reaction when I tell her I’m going to have dinner with my ex. She’s going to fucking hate it, especially now after the whole Phillip incident.

  “Fine. Set it up. I want to get this over with as quickly as possible.”

  “Any day of the week good for you?”

  “Yep. Make sure you pick the loudest, most family-oriented restaurant you can find. Nadine always hated those.”

  “Do I sound like a fucking secretary?”

  “Bite me. Just do it, Enzo.”

  Grumbling, he ends the call.

  I stare at my computer screen for minutes after, still pissed that Nadine is forcing me to have dinner with her. That snake is up to something; I know it deep in my bones. I rub my face, frustrated that I let my ego dictate my actions for far too long. If I hadn’t been so stubborn, I could be free of the woman by now. Clenching my jaw, I force myself to focus on my screen.

  A text message from Chiara flashes on my phone.

  CHIARA: I’m sorry I missed your class. I didn’t want to make things harder in case you’re still mad.

  ME: You shouldn’t have missed class on my account.

  God, that sounded too harsh. She doesn’t reply right away, and it makes me feel like an asshole.

  ME: I’m afraid that infraction requires punishment.

  CHIARA: What kind of punishment?

  ME: The kind that will make you scream my name.

  CHIARA: Tonight?

  I’m about to reply when I get a text from Enzo saying Nadine wants to have dinner tonight. The goofy grin I had vanishes in an instant. Fuck. I did tell Enzo I wanted to handle Nadine as soon as possible. I didn’t think she’d give an answer so soon.

  ME: I can’t tonight. I have to deal with divorce stuff. Tomorrow, I promise.

  CHIARA: Okay.

  ME: I’ll call you later. I love you, Goldi.

  CHIARA: I love you too, Big Bad Wolf.

  Guilt makes my chest heavy. Technically, I didn’t lie, but I shouldn’t have omitted that I’m meeting Nadine tonight.

  I try to dissuade the bad feeling by listing all the reasons it’s better if I tell Chiara after the fact and when I have Nadine’s signature on the divorce
papers. It’s a meaningless dinner. She doesn’t need to worry about it, especially when there are still unresolved issues between us.

  35

  Alistair

  I have to give Enzo props. The restaurant he picked is a fucking zoo. With kids running around and screaming, I don’t think anyone can have a proper conversation here, which is exactly what I wanted. Yet Nadine managed to snag a table in an isolated part of the restaurant that offers us some privacy. I grind my teeth when the hostess walks me to her. I should have gotten here first.

  Nadine smiles broadly, showing all her veneered teeth when she sees me. I get a whiff of her heavy perfume before I even get to the table. She doesn’t stand to greet me but rather leans forward a little to show off her cleavage. She’s playing the seductress role tonight. She’s definitely up to something.

  “What did you do? Bathe in perfume before coming here?” I scowl.

  “It’s your favorite fragrance. You used to love it.”

  I pick up the menu, ignoring her offended expression. “No, I used to pretend I liked it. It gave me headaches.”

  “You’re so grumpy today. You need to relax, babe.”

  “Don’t call me that,” I snap.

  “Fine. I’m here, trying to be civil, and all you’re giving me in return are barbs.”

  I put the menu down and glower at her. “Let’s cut the bullshit. What do you want, Nadine? I’ve agreed to give you half the amount of what the vineyard is worth even though you’re not entitled to any of it.”

  She reaches across the table and covers my hand. I pull away with a jerky movement. Her touch makes my skin crawl.

  “Are we really doing this, Alistair? We used to be so in love. What happened?”

  “What happened? Let’s see. How about you fucked my friend behind my back? Does that ring a bell?”

  Her face twists into a grimace. “That was just me lashing out. You had lost interest in our marriage way before that.”

  “You’re right. My fault in this mess was not asking for a divorce when I should have. But I’m willing to rectify it now.”

  “I don’t want a divorce. I thought you were being petty to punish me but that, in the end, we could still save our marriage.”