“The movies?” I said dubiously.
“Yes, you know, they have this big theatre and you all sit in the dark and eat popcorn and watch the movie together and sometimes you even hold hands because since it's dark, no one else can see.”
“And what comes after this hand holding?” I said suspiciously.
“Whatever you want,” he replied with a wink.
“That’s enough of that,” Dad said as he strode into the barn looking annoyed.
“Enough of what?” I said, hoping he hadn’t heard much of what Jordan was saying.
I knew that he liked having Jordan around and he didn’t mind us hanging out but I was pretty sure he didn’t want it to go any further than that. Missy had been the one who pushed me to hang out with Jordan in the first place while my father had resisted every step of the way. I think he wanted to keep me twelve forever and when it came to boys, I wasn’t so sure that I minded.
Horses were the only thing I cared about. Going to the movies? I didn’t even know what was playing and all I could think about was that it would be two or three hours wasted just sitting around when instead I could have been riding. I was starting to think that maybe I was a workaholic but told myself I was just dedicated instead and that was what I’d tell Jordan if he pushed the whole movie date issue. And holding hands? My palms were starting to sweat just thinking about it.
“Enough of whatever you guys were talking about,” Dad said.
I let out a sigh of relief, knowing that he hadn’t heard anything. His Dad radar was going off though so I scuttled outside to grab Bluebird. It was his trail ride day and I was going to ride him over to Sand Hill to check up on Esther and Harlow. I didn’t want to admit it but I’d been avoiding her. I hadn’t wanted to tell her that I’d known Harlow was in trouble because even though I knew all along that he was at Jess’s farm, I still thought he was at least being taken care of. I never thought she’d stoop so low as to just ship him off like that but she had. And I didn’t want there to be any lies between me and Esther so I was going to have to tell her the truth.
Bluebird was fresh as I rode him up the hill. He was supposed to be having a lazy day but I let him canter. He kicked up his heels as we jumped a little ditch that had been carved out by the recent rains. I didn’t let him jump the logs. A trail day was supposed to be just that and I wanted to save my pony for the next show, whatever that show would be.
So far the summer was looking pretty bleak. It was too hot to show unless the grounds had a covered arena or the classes were held in the evening and even then you held the risk of being rained out or attacked by mosquitos. I was hoping that we’d find a few local shows that were close to us so that we wouldn’t have to spend a lot on entry fees and gas money to get there.
Plus, we could maybe pick up some lesson kids or boarders. Sunny had been really great with Cat. I knew that she would be an easy horse to teach beginners on. But the reality of the situation was that I didn’t want to spend my whole life telling kids to post up and down. Maybe when I was older and after I’d had a chance to make my own Olympic dreams come true but not now. Now I craved the show life. The exciting crazy rush that was getting your horses ready for the big day and showing up prepared and ready to win.
As Bluebird and I slipped through the fence and onto Sand Hill property, I wondered if maybe Esther would know of any shows that we could go to. And I got a warm and fuzzy feeling when I thought about the fact that maybe Esther might take me to some shows like the old days.
CHAPTER TEN
It was quiet over at Esther’s farm. I’d expected to find Hanna riding Hemi or exercising one of Esther’s horses, people buzzing around doing barn chores and maybe Esther teaching lessons. Instead the ring was empty and there were only a couple of horses out in the fields, their fly masks on and tails swishing at the flies.
I got off Bluebird and led him into the barn.
“Hello?” I called out.
The office door was shut, the air conditioner whirring away behind it. I thought that I could hear muffled voices. In the old days I would have knocked or maybe even burst in as it always felt like Esther didn’t have any secrets but now I wasn’t so sure. I stood around for a while and eventually untacked Bluebird and put him in one of the empty stalls. He sniffed noses with Esther’s Paint mare and squealed.
“Be quiet,” I told him. “I’m not even sure we are supposed to be here.”
Esther had said I was welcome any time but now I felt like I was a trespasser and that maybe I should have called before I just rode over. After all, she didn’t just show up at my farm unannounced. Maybe the open door policy had guidelines that you were supposed to follow.
Harlow was standing in his old stall, his head down.
“Hello boy,” I said, sticking my hands through the bars.
He lifted his head but then put it down again. I opened the stall door and slipped inside. All four of his legs were wrapped and I could see the poultice on his legs at the top and bottom of the wraps.
“Are you okay?” I asked him.
I stuck out my hand and he sniffed it with a sigh, then retreated to the back of his stall. My young horse had bounced back pretty quickly from his ordeal but Harlow was older and he was also lame. Who knew what Jess had been giving him to cover up that lameness and make it look like he was sound enough to jump and now that all the drugs were out of his system, he looked like he was in a lot of pain.
I rubbed his neck and tried to tell him that everything would be okay but my words sounded empty and hollow. Harlow had been retired for a reason and he could have lived out the rest of his life as a fat and happy pasture pet but now his body had been broken and his spirit wasn’t that far behind. He’d given up on life. I could see it in his dull eyes. The way he just stood there not even caring anymore. And part of it was my fault because I couldn’t get him away from Jess.
It had been a bad idea to come. I knew that now. Of course Esther wouldn’t want to see me. My rescue horse was happy and carefree next door and I’d soon be riding him again while Harlow looked like he might drop dead at any minute. I had my tack in my arms and was just about to sneak Bluebird out and ride away before anyone saw me when the office door opened.
“Emily,” Esther said wearily. “I didn’t know you were here. Why didn’t you come in?”
“I didn’t want to bother you,” I said. “I thought you might be doing important business stuff. I’m just going to go.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said. “Stay.”
I looked over at Harlow. “Is he going to be alright?” I asked her.
“I don’t know,” she said. “He’s in bad shape.”
“I’ve never seen him look like that before,” I said, putting my tack down and going over to the stall. “He just looks like he’s given up.”
“I think that maybe he has,” she said.
“Well we can’t let him,” I cried. “We have to do something. We have to make him want to live.”
“If I knew a way to do that then I’d be a rich woman,” Esther said. “All we can do is feed him and give him medicine and maybe love him enough to make up for everything that he’s been through.”
“Is he in a lot of pain?” I asked her.
“Some,” she said with a sigh. “His legs are shot. They're worse than they ever were.”
“I’m so sorry,” I said.
“It’s not your fault,” she said, putting her hand on my shoulder. “You helped me rescue him. You didn’t know.”
“That’s the thing,” I said, gulping back tears. “I did know.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
We sat in the office with cups of coffee and I poured my heart out to Esther. I told her all about how Jess suddenly had Harlow and how I’d tried to get him back but that she wouldn’t sell him to us. I told her that I knew she was drugging him to make him sound enough to jump and that eventually he’d break down. But I also told her that I had no idea Jess would just ship him off like that
. Discard him like an old shoe that you threw in the trash.
“I still can’t believe she did that,” I said. “And it's all my fault.”
“It’s not your fault,” Esther said. “It's mine. I left him with someone I trusted and she betrayed me and I betrayed Harlow by not checking up on him.”
“I did the same thing to Four,” I said. “I left him at Fox Run because I thought Missy would keep an eye on him and I never even checked in to make sure he was okay.”
“We’ve both learned our lessons I think,” Esther said.
There was silence between us for a moment, both of us considering the consequences of our actions because when you sold a horse or gave it away, there was always the chance that things wouldn’t turn out the way you had hoped for them. That the happy retirement or great free lease would turn sour and your horse would pay the price.
“We have to make Harlow happy again,” I said.
Esther just shook her head. “I think maybe the only way to do that is to end his suffering.”
“No,” I cried, jumping to my feet. “You can’t put him down now, not after we just saved him.”
“But saved him for what?” Esther said. “So that he can live the rest of his life in pain? So that he’ll suffer until the end of his days?”
“But he’ll be here,” I said. “With us.”
“And if we keep him alive just because of our own selfishness then we are just as bad as the abusers,” Esther replied.
In the end I made Esther promise that she would give Harlow more time. He deserved that at least. A chance to see if he could get better. I knew that him being sound again was now just a pipe dream but if he could be sound enough to get around without suffering then we owed it to him to see if he wanted to try. I knew that he’d let us know when he’d had enough. Esther thought he was already there but I knew that he was in shock. Maybe in a few days he’d start to perk up a bit.
“I could come over tomorrow with some carrots for him,” I told Esther as I tacked Bluebird up to ride back home. “If that is okay with you.”
“You know you are welcome any time,” she said. “And Hanna will be here tomorrow, I know she’d love to see you.”
“Great,” I said but really I was wishing that I could have a little more time with Esther to myself.
CHAPTER TWELVE
The next day I tacked up Arion and rode him over to Sand Hill. It was Bluebird’s day off and besides, my young gray gelding needed the work. He hadn’t really been showing much and had a lot of pent up energy. He galloped up the hill but I didn’t dare let him jump the logs because he was far too excited. He was in full on Thoroughbred mode today like he thought he could race the clouds in the sky and win.
We trotted down the trail, under the trees where the ground was still wet and damp from the night before. Mold and the scent of crushed grass filled my nostrils and I laughed as Arion spooked at something rustling in the bushes. A wild rabbit popped its head up and I thought Arion’s head was going to explode for a second but then the rabbit was gone and I pushed him forward, using my legs to stop him from going up or sideways.
In a way it was nice to ride a horse that needed my full attention because it took my mind off everything else. Bluebird was so push button and reliable that I could sit on him and not do anything and he’d just read my mind and do whatever I was thinking. Arion wasn’t like that. He had a mind of his own and today his mind said that he was going to act all silly and embarrass me just because he could.
Hanna was out in the ring when I got there, riding her bay gelding Hemi around on a loose rein. She waved when she saw me.
“Want to join in on my lesson?” she called over.
“If it's okay with Esther,” I said, untying my saddle bag and dumping it on the fence. “And if you don’t mind.”
“Of course not,” she said with a grin. “If you’re here that means Esther has to spread the torture around.”
“Sounds great,” I said, trying not to sound sarcastic and failing. “Next time you can come over when my dad is teaching me and he can torture you instead.”
“Deal,” she said.
I rode Arion into the ring where he proceeded to snort at the jumps and act like he’d never seen any before in his entire life.
“Is he green?” Hanna asked as Arion jumped sideways and almost bumped into Hemi who pinned his ears and threatened to kick.
“No,” I said. “He’s a Thoroughbred.”
“I see,” she said.
But I could tell that she couldn’t see at all. She thought that my horse’s over exuberance was naughtiness and that he probably couldn't jump to save his life. The thing was that Arion had only got better with time. He jumped just as well as Bluebird did and he was fast too. He wasn’t as handy as my pony but what he lacked in nimbleness, he made up for with speed.
“And so who do we have here?” Esther asked as she walked into the ring.
“Arion,” I said as he bunny hopped past her.
“Is he new?” she said and I detected the same distaste I’d heard in Hanna’s voice.
“No,” I repeated. “Just excited.”
“Well shall we get on with it then before he decides to jump out of the ring and run away with you?”
I didn’t reply because it wasn’t a question. It was a statement. Esther didn’t think that my gray horse was any good but I’d show her. Arion could out jump Hemi any day and he was going to today, if I could just get him to focus.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
The lesson went as well as could be expected. Once Arion settled down, he didn’t embarrass me too much and I think both Hanna and Esther were surprised that my silly horse could actually jump and do so well. He flew over the course that Esther had set up, his ears pricked in the purple ear bonnet I’d put on him to keep the flies from bothering him too much. Like every Thoroughbred he had thin skin and was sensitive to practically everything. Plus, I’d put on a matching purple saddle pad and for once I’d got the sort of thrill that I thought Mickey probably got when she looked all matching and awesome.
“Can we raise them up?” Hanna said, a little breathless after Hemi had tugged her around the course.
He was a strong horse and it took a lot to keep him in check. I could tell that Hanna’s arms must have felt like wet noodles and I knew that feeling well. I was surprised that she didn’t want to call it a day. It was already too hot, the humidity practically one hundred percent and sweat was running down my face and into my eyes.
“You up for it Emily?” Esther asked me.
“Of course,” I replied, not one to ever back down from a challenge.
Esther raised the fences. They now look ginormous. I knew that Arion could jump them but I also had to wonder if I wasn’t pushing him just in order to show off. But Esther was pushing us so that we got better. You wouldn’t ever improve if you stayed in your comfort zone and jumped the same fences that you always jumped. You had to strive to be better and I wanted to be better and I knew that Hanna did too.
“You first?” Hanna said.
If I hadn’t felt sorry for her sore arms, I would have said no but I wanted to cut her some slack. After all, she was the one letting me crash her lesson.
“Alright,” I said.
As I gathered up my reins, I could tell that Arion was getting tired. He’d burned up a lot of energy on the way over being silly and now the heat had got to him. I had to put him first if I wanted to have a horse to ride for the rest of the summer.
“Last round though,” I added. “My horse is tired in this heat.”
“We all are,” Esther said. “You know I wouldn’t let you push him too much but you have to push him a little.”
As we cantered towards the first jump, I was glad to have trainers who agreed with me. Who didn’t make me do things that I didn’t want to do. Expanding your jumping experience and pushing boundaries was one thing but pushing your horse to the point of exhaustion was another and I knew better than that.<
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Arion jumped the higher fences with a lazy attitude. I knew he was done before we even started but we had to try. And I knew that he could clear the fences in his sleep but instead he had two rails down because he couldn’t be bothered to tuck his legs.
“Told you he was tired,” I said as I let him walk. “I could feel it.”
“That’s okay,” Esther said. “It’s the beginning of the summer. They are all getting used to the heat and humidity just like we are.” She wiped the sweat off her own face with her bandana.
As Hanna jumped Hemi and a small breeze made its way through the arena, I longed to be anywhere but here. It had to be cooler in Paris. Europe didn’t have the heat and humidity that Florida did. If we’d won the semi-final or if I’d had enough money for a plane ticket then I’d be on my way by now instead of stuck here in this swamp infested hell hole.
I watched as Hanna and Hemi had the same two rails down that we did. I wasn’t sure if she’d done it as an act of consolidation or not. Esther put her hands up with a sigh like she’d given up on us.
“You girls are obviously done,” she said. “Go cool down your horses.”
“I’m going to give Hemi a nice cold bath,” Hanna said.
“I think I’ll take Arion home,” I replied. “I have more horses to work today.”
“Don’t you ever rest?” Hanna said.
“Not now I have a whole summer schedule worked out,” I said. “I’m working four horses, helping our young boarder with her new pony and I’m looking for some summer shows. You don’t know of any summer shows around here, do you?” I called out to Esther, who was putting the poles back up in their cups.
“It’s too hot to show,” she said. “This heat.” She shook her head. “Now I remember why I didn’t come back sooner.”
“You know you missed this place,” I told her.
Summer Rider (Show Jumping Dreams ~ Book 31) Page 3
