“You’re alive.” Meredith’s shaky voice stopped all conversation. They all turned and looked at her standing in the doorway in the hospital scrubs.
Jeremy saw the wild eyes and hands balled into fists and his heart sank. He’d done this to her. He’d put her in the middle of an unbelievable situation and ripped her apart.
He reached out to her but she smacked his hands away. Her glare traveled the room as she stood there. “You all knew?”
“Only Ellis and Sara.” Garrett’s soft voice did nothing to calm her down.
She launched her body at Jeremy. Fists pummeled his chest as she called him names and battered his arms and shoulders. He held her and shifted his head to keep from being punched in the face, but otherwise didn’t defend himself.
He ached for her. Anything she needed to do to wipe out the pain, he’d accept.
“Meredith, that’s enough.” Sara laid a gentle hand on Meredith’s back and the pounding stopped. “It’s okay.”
Sara shot Jeremy a murderous scowl as she soothed her new friend. Helplessness like Jeremy had never known pulled him in every direction. The joy at solving the case crashed under the weight of seeing a strong woman brought to her knees.
Meredith pulled up straight and pushed her shoulders back. She looked at Sara and no one else. “You were right. Falling for them will kill you.”
And she walked out of the room.
“What just happened?” Jeremy whispered in stunned silence.
Joel and Ellis made excuses to leave the room. Garrett frowned. Sara lost it.
She pointed out the open doorway. “Go apologize.”
“I couldn’t tell her and keep her safe.” Jeremy repeated the mantra playing in his head.
He’d done it for her own good. He’d wanted her as far removed from the lies and deception as possible. Yet somehow he’d dropped her right in it.
“You could, but you chose not to.” Sara added Garrett to her glare zone.
He held up his hands in surrender. “Don’t look at me. I told you the truth.”
“Why?”
Garrett didn’t hesitate. “Because I love you.”
The comment had Sara smiling. “I know.”
Garrett raised an eyebrow in response but didn’t say anything.
The scene confused the crap out of Jeremy. Yeah, he knew Sara was the right woman for his brother. Jeremy had always known, but Garrett had always been so tight-lipped about his feelings for her. He acted as if she was just the one who’d landed on his doorstep when he was ready to settle down. Convenient, but not as important as she should be.
He’d put Sara to the side and focused on his job, then joined her when the work was done. But that wall had crumbled. The way Garrett looked at Sara now was so intimate that Jeremy started to squirm. Maybe some things weren’t his business.
“And we’ll have a wedding. A real one, with a dress and flowers and whatever else you want.” Garrett’s good mood slipped. “Just don’t make me plan it.”
Sara’s smile grew wide enough to light up the room.
Jeremy wanted to be happy for them but he was too busy wallowing. “What is going on here? We’re talking about Meredith.”
Garrett exhaled. “No, man. We’re talking about you.”
“What does that mean?”
“I’ve been there. I pushed Sara away because I was so scared about losing her. It’s illogical but normal for what we do.” Garrett clapped a hand against Jeremy’s back. “Don’t make my mistakes. Don’t waste time.”
The lecture made sense for Garrett but not for Jeremy. He’d always been the easygoing one. “But I’m not like you….”
Or was he?
Life raced along for him at a steady pace. He took risks and didn’t shun commitment. Then a woman had died in front of him, leaving blood on his hands, and something in his mind clicked. Keep a solid distance. Don’t get involved.
His mind flashed to Meredith. The pain digging in his chest had him rubbing space to try to ease the pain. But his mind kept spinning. To the woman rolling around in bed with him. To the devastated one in the hospital room.
He had to find her.
He tried to push Garrett but his big brother stopped him. “Where are you going?”
Jeremy dropped his guard and let them see the emotions fighting inside him. “To beg if I have to.”
Sara smiled. “It’s about time.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Meredith stood at the side of her hospital bed and pressed her hands against her stomach to keep from heaving. Her muscles ached and her hands shook. Reaction to the danger and the fallout had her body in a vise grip and it kept tightening.
She knew her response to being blocked by Jeremy, to all that had happened, flew well out of bounds. Seeing them all standing around laughing while she prayed for him to come out of a fake coma made her the dumbest woman alive. Even at her lowest point during her relationship with Clint, she’d never felt as pathetic as she did right then.
Despite all that, the truth was, Jeremy didn’t owe her anything. He’d never made any promises. Not cluing her in to his plan hurt her as much as being banged around in that SUV as it almost went off the cliff, but his work was his work and she didn’t belong in the middle of it.
But thinking he was hurt or, worse, dead, sucked the life right out of her. Her brain burned from the pain. She’d been willing to humiliate herself and sacrifice Sara in front of the doctor and everyone else if it meant helping Jeremy.
And it had all been a big joke. On her.
She grabbed the T-shirt she’d worn there and reached for the hem of the scrubs. She got the shirt halfway up her stomach when Jeremy’s deep voice stopped her.
“I’m happy to watch a striptease, but you should know I’m standing here.”
She spun around. “What are you doing in my room?”
“Apologizing.”
No, no, no. She was on the verge of breaking down. Seeing him ate away at her.
She held up her hands as if to fight off the words. If he tried to give her the same lame excuse he’d offer to an insignificant coworker, she would melt into a puddle. He’d reduced her to that.
Falling for him was killing her.
“It’s fine. Go celebrate with your friends.” She turned her back on him and opened her mouth to draw in huge sweeping breaths.
The tactic didn’t work. The panting wouldn’t stop and all of a sudden his handsome face appeared in front of her.
Sadness tugged at the corners of his eyes. “I want to be with you.”
This was about the sex. Had to be.
Gathering all her energy, she forced her voice to stay steady. “Look, you showed a girl a good time but it’s time for me to go.”
“Stop.”
His hands moved to her shoulders and her body jolted. She had to stay stiff to keep from curling into him. Her strength waned and her head spun. She couldn’t take much more.
“It needs to be said.” She tried to shrug out of his hold but his grip stayed firm.
“The distance thing doesn’t work on you.”
It was the wrong thing to say. Her temper flared out of control. This time when she pulled her arms back he let go. “And just what do you know about me? You let me ride around with you and get shot at. We had sex. It meant nothing.”
He didn’t try to touch her again. His arms hung loose at his sides. “Everything.”
Her fury crashed into a pile inside her. “What?”
“It meant everything and I was an idiot not to include you in the plan.” He raised his hand again. This time his fingers slipped into her hair. “I kept telling myself that you had seen enough violence in your life and that I had to stop adding more.”
The combination of his hands and the closeness of his mouth wrecked her concentration. “So you pretended to be dead?”
“In my stupid male brain it made sense.”
She put her hand over his where it rested on her cheek. “Jeremy, I—
”
He framed her face in his hands. “You told me I was flawed. That was the understatement of the year. My mind is a mess over the Serena mistakes. The guilt eats at me.”
“It wasn’t your fault.”
“But hurting you was.”
She wanted to argue but couldn’t. He put her in this place where she doubted her feelings and feared the future again. “It’s okay. I’m fine.”
If being so numb inside she worried she was dead meant fine. Yeah, she was good.
“I’m not.” He placed a sweet kiss on her lips. “Without you, I’m lost.”
The words kick-started her heart. “But you have your work and your—”
He kissed her again. This one went on and dragged her along with him. When he lifted his head, she saw the hope she felt in her heart mirrored in his eyes.
“Stay with me. Give me a chance to show you how a man should treat a woman. Let me take care of you, walk with you, comfort you.”
Each phrase was a vow. She felt the words as he said them. Saw the determination in his eyes and the worry lingering underneath. She finally saw it. He thought she was going to push him away.
But she couldn’t believe. Not yet. “I can’t live like Sara did. You can’t shove me in a corner and forget about me for days and months at a time. I deserve better and so does she, but the real answer is it will kill me to be that disconnected.”
Then she stopped talking. Her gaze searched his face for any reaction, knowing her entire future depended on what he said next.
A smile broke across his mouth.
“I’ll share with you all that I can about my work and not walk into danger just to prove I can.” His thumb rubbed against her bottom lip. “No more undercover work. At night I come home to you. Only you. And, I’m hoping, forever.”
A sob broke in her chest. The wall of pain inside her broke free. Falling for him wasn’t hard. She wondered if loving him would be.
“Well?” He actually looked nervous.
Or he did until she wrapped her arms around his neck. “You have to do something for me first.”
The tension arcing across his shoulders fizzled. He pulled her tight against him with his arms around her waist and his fingertips brushing her bare skin. “Anything.”
“I don’t have anywhere to live.”
“Funny, I was thinking of asking for a transfer to San Diego. With the shooting, and my time in service and record, it shouldn’t be an issue.” His hand traveled up her bare back. “And I’ll need a roommate.”
“That’s convenient, because so will I.” She kissed him with all the saved-up passion that had been brewing inside her. The promise, the possibilities, the future, she could taste it all on his lips.
The seconds ticked by and the heat built between them. When he pulled back she nearly threw him on the bed and told him to lock the door.
“One request,” he said against her mouth. “Not Coronado.”
She threw her head back and laughed. “I can’t afford it anyway. And I’d rather save money for our future.”
“Now there’s a plan we can work on together.”
* * *
WITH EACH STEP, his shoes clicked against the linoleum. Bars clanged behind him as doors opened and shut. He blocked the rumble of inmate voices and shouts aimed in his direction. He had one goal—the room at the end of the hall.
The guard put his hand on the handle, waiting for the agreed-upon signal. With a nod, the guard punched in the security code and swiped his card.
The door creaked open but the man inside at the table didn’t look up. Word was the man was expecting his lawyer. The new one. When the prosecutor brought charges against the old one as an accessory, the man had turned on Bruce. The judge froze most of Bruce’s accounts until the money could be traced and the origin authenticated. Until then, he was stuck with a public defender.
“You’re late.” Bruce Casden traced a pattern on the table as he spoke.
“Technically, you’re not expecting me. Not breathing, anyway.”
Bruce slammed his back against his chair and looked up. All the color drained from his face. “Hill.”
“Jeremy Hill, to be exact.” He didn’t bother sitting down. He had no intention of staying that long anyway.
“You’re dead.”
Jeremy crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the door. He’d planned this scene for a week. He was ready to relocate to his new place with Meredith in San Diego. That meant the announcement of his sudden reincarnation would hit the newspapers soon.
But Bruce would hear the news from Jeremy. He’d earned that. “As with everything else in your life, you messed that up.”
Bruce snarled. Gone was any semblance of humanity. “I can still make it happen.”
“Not without money. Not without power.”
“You really think you’re succeeding in taking both?” Bruce cackled more than laughed.
“I’ll ask your free lawyer when he gets here.”
“Your death was all over the news.”
“Faked for your benefit.”
“Your brother—”
“Also fine.” Jeremy smiled as Bruce’s face turned even whiter. The man knew what that meant. All his careful planning had gotten him was a stack of new charges and the prosecutor’s office was filing them now. “You failed from every angle.”
“This time.”
“Every time. That’s what I came to tell you.” Jeremy pushed off the wall and leaned over the desk across from Bruce. “You had your one shot at me and blew it. I’m willing to forget it. You rot in prison and I never see you again. That’s the deal.”
Bruce shook his head. “I’m going to get out of here.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Then why are you so afraid?”
“I’m letting you know I’m not going to kill you over Serena.”
“That stupid bi—”
Jeremy grabbed Bruce by the throat and shoved him until his head hit the wall. Bruce kicked and gagged. The temptation to squeeze just a bit harder and end this thing nearly overwhelmed Jeremy.
He remembered the life he wanted with Meredith and eased up on his grip. “You are going to leave me alone. Me and my brother and everyone I know.”
Bruce grabbed at Jeremy’s hands but couldn’t peel them off. “Why should I?”
“Because if you don’t, I’ll kill you. You know me, Bruce. You know I will do it.”
“You don’t scare me.”
“I should. I’ve been itching to take you down for Serena. But I have better things to do these days. You spending the rest of your life in prison is enough, but only barely.” Jeremy let go.
Bruce whooshed to the floor in a coughing fit. “No deal.”
“Just remember I have the power of Border Patrol and the DIA behind me. That’s a whole bunch of people who know how to make scum like you disappear.”
Bruce continued to hold his neck. “You follow the rules. There’s no way.”
“Everyone has a line. You found mine. I suggest you not try to cross it again.” Jeremy headed for the door. “We’re done talking.”
“I’m not.”
But Jeremy kept going. Bruce’s shouts bounced off the walls as Jeremy walked down the hall.
He kept going, through gates and checkpoints, until he hit the main door and walked out into the bright day. The heat hit his face and he closed his eyes to enjoy it. When he opened them again, a car sat at the end of the long yard on the other side of the gate.
Meredith leaned against the side of the car looking like a mix of sunshine and sex. Her dress reached her knees but the thin straps showed off her shoulders. Either way, he’d have her out of it soon.
She was the woman who restarted his life. The one who made everything right and washed away the darkness.
“Hey, sailor.” She wound her arms around his neck and gave him a quick kiss as soon as he reached her.
He rubbed his hands up and down her back, lo
ving the feel of her. Loving every part of her. “I’ll have you know we’re an army family.”
“I don’t care what you are so long as we can go home.”
Home.
With her he’d found that. “I’ll go anywhere with you.”
“Then lead the way.”
* * * * *
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Chapter One
The knock at the door surprised Zane Chisholm. He’d just spent the warm summer day in the saddle rounding up cattle. All he wanted to do was kick off his boots and hit the hay early. The last thing he wanted was company.
But whoever was knocking didn’t sound as if they were planning to go away anytime soon. Living at the end of a dirt road, he didn’t get uninvited company—other than one of his five brothers. So that narrows it down, he thought as he went to the window and peered out through the curtains.
The car parked outside was a compact, lime-green with Montana State University plates. Definitely not one of his brothers, he thought with a grin. Chisholm men wouldn’t be caught dead driving such a “girlie” car. Especially a lime-green one.
Even more odd was the young, willowy blonde pounding on his door. She must be lost and needing directions. Or she was selling something.
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