Frankie met his deal-sealing kiss with a new warmth in her veins. If only her father could see them now, he’d see straight away that Rhys wasn’t using her. He’d see that he loved her for her, not for any conniving scheme. Then she could love Rhys unstintingly. She was pretty sure she already loved him, but it was an insecure emotion which didn’t mix well with her self-doubt.
‘You know that giving up the ride on Peace Offering in the National is going to have a wider effect, don’t you?’ Rhys said cautiously.
‘Yeah, I know. He’s bound to go favourite again now.’
‘Maybe, but it also means you probably won’t get to ride him in any prep races beforehand as well.’
‘Ah, yes,’ she said, realising what he meant. ‘I’m not going to ride him at Cheltenham, you mean?’
Rhys nodded with an expression of anguish on his face.
‘Yeah. I’m sorry. I know you were looking forward to having your first Festival ride.’
Frankie chewed her lip in deliberation. She hadn’t thought further than the Grand National ride. Losing her one and only Cheltenham ride was a bit more disappointing.
‘Is it too late to change my mind?’
‘You being serious?’
‘No, silly. Sure, it would’ve been nice to ride at Cheltenham, but I can’t have it all, I guess.’
‘God, your father is going to hate me even more than he already does,’ Rhys groaned.
‘He doesn’t hate you.’
‘Really?’ Rhys sounded doubtful.
She bit her lip. She wished she could tell Rhys what Vanessa had told her earlier, just so he knew that it wasn’t him that Doug disliked. But she knew she couldn’t. Even if Rhys didn’t get on with his father, it still wouldn’t be right to tell him just what a sleaze Alan Bradford had been.
‘Does your dad know about us?’ she asked.
Rhys shook his head.
‘No. I tell him as little as I possibly can about my private life.’
She wondered if Alan Bradford hated Doug as much as Doug hated him. If he did, and Rhys told him about he and Frankie dating, would his reaction be the same? Would he try to dissuade Rhys for fear of his scandalous past being exposed? A new fear gripped her chest. What if he was successful?
‘He’d have to find out eventually, wouldn’t he?’ she said apprehensively.
Rhys looped his arms around her and gave her a bemused smile.
‘Hey, what’s wrong? You scared he won’t like you? You know I couldn’t care less about what my father thinks. Besides, how can he not like you?’
Frankie smiled weakly, feeling little comfort in his words or his arms. Rhys might claim not to care what his father thought of him, but wasn’t it because of his father that he was so determined to win the Grand National? She knew too much now. Alan Bradford had killed his unborn child to protect his secret. When he discovered Rhys was dating the daughter of the only people who knew of his past, as he must surely do, he would have to assume the worst. What lies and what lengths would he go to to ensure Rhys never found out?
Chapter 43
Frankie’s Girl Guides meeting midway through the week was usually a time for her to escape whatever problems she might have elsewhere in her life. This week, however, her problems continued to encroach on her. Tonight was the Chocolate Go For It, which had Frankie slavering at the mouth as the girls tasted all the different confectionery with little care to the amount of calories involved. But also the Golden Miller was also hosting the semi-final of their singing competition. She knew what was coming towards the end of the meeting when Cassa sidled up to her.
‘Frankie, can you give me a lift home tonight?’
Frankie regarded her with a sceptical eye.
‘You know you don’t have to ask me every time, Cassa. ’Course I can. I can have you home in twenty minutes.’
Cassa fiddled with the hem of her T-shirt and looked up at Frankie with doleful eyes.
‘There’s no rush to get home. I mean, it’d only mean I sit and watch TV all night.’
Frankie grinned at her as she stacked the last of the plastic chairs in the corner of the community hall.
‘Somewhere you’d rather be?’
‘Please, Frankie, it’s the semi-final tonight,’ Cassa begged, bouncing up and down on her knees. ‘The semi-final.’
Frankie gave an exaggerated sigh of defeat.
‘Which means if you get through tonight, I only have to do this once more?’
‘Wouldn’t it be amazing if I made the final?’ squeaked Cassa.
‘Your mum would kill me if she knew, you know that?’
‘She won’t find out, I promise. She’s always at work. She still doesn’t know anybody in Helensvale. All of the friends she’s made live near the hospital in Bristol.’
This small reassurance only partly settled the niggling concern in Frankie’s stomach.
‘But what if you win, Cassa? And I honestly believe you can. You realise what we’re doing is cheating, don’t you? You’re underage.’ The more she thought about it, the less sure she was about the whole thing. They’d both be in a muck heap of trouble if they were found out.
She shook her head. This was a bad idea. On the other hand, seeing Cassa bloom with a confidence which had been absent prior to the singing competition, was just so satisfying. Was it worth losing her Girl Guiding job over?
‘Nobody has to know,’ Cassa pleaded.
‘But—’
‘What are you two scheming about?’ a voice interrupted them.
Cassa gasped and stood frozen to the spot. Mrs Preston walked across the room from the door. She laughed at Cassa’s shock. ‘Surprise! Matron had double-booked my shift so I thought I’d come surprise you. What does nobody have to know about?’
Judging by her cheery chatter, Frankie reckoned she hadn’t overheard any more of their conversation.
‘It was the Chocolate Go For It tonight,’ she said, her brain whirring. ‘Cassa was concerned you mightn’t approve of the amount of chocolate she ate.’
Cassa looked at her without confidence. Was that the best she could do? Mrs Preston gave a puzzled laugh.
‘Sweetie, you must learn to relax,’ she said, giving Cassa’s shoulder a squeeze. ‘I know I like you to eat healthily, but I don’t mind the occasional pig out. We all do it, don’t we?’ She looked at Frankie expectantly.
Frankie’s food binges haunted her sleep, nevertheless she smiled in agreement.
‘Are you ready to go?’ Mrs Preston asked Cassa.
Cassa looked from her mother to Frankie in desperation.
‘But–but Frankie was going to give me a lift home.’
‘But I’m here now. I’m sure Frankie will be relieved to not chauffeur you home for once.’
Watching Cassa’s eyes fill with disappointment made Frankie’s heart ache. Even if they did manage to persuade Mrs Preston otherwise, they would then have to explain the hour in between leaving the community hall and getting home.
‘Sorry, Cassa,’ she said.
Cassa’s shoulders drooped and she turned away, dragging her feet. Frankie felt even worse.
‘I’ll see you next week, okay?’ she called after the departing pair.
‘Yeah, see you next week,’ came Cassa’s gloomy reply.
Frankie watched them exit the building before turning back to the plastic chairs. She knew what it felt like to be thirteen and have something that felt so big cave in. It made her long for next week to arrive so she could reassure Cassa that pulling out of this singing contest wasn’t the end of the world. Before that though, she would have to go over to the Golden Miller and tell them their young superstar wouldn’t be performing anymore.
*
The pub was warm with the crush of customers. Frankie squeezed through to Tom’s Corner, and her housemate raised a hand in greeting.
‘I’m here!’ she said, raising her voice above the babbles of conversation. ‘What are your other two wishes?’
‘You
want a drink?’ he said.
Frankie shook her head.
‘I just popped in to tell Joey that Cassa’s not singing tonight.’
‘Really? Why?’
Frankie opened her mouth to explain then hesitated. Not even Tom knew of her and Cassa’s deception.
‘Long story.’
‘Well, good luck with trying to get his attention. He’s been rushing around like a headless chicken all night. I’ve been waiting for a refill for ten minutes.’
Frankie squeezed between Tom and other bar-propping customers to try catch Joey’s eye. Pressed up against Tom’s thigh as she waited, she became more and more aware of their contact. She was practically sat on his lap. Tom wasn’t making any effort to move his leg. Oh dear, maybe her jokey pick-up line had been misconstrued. She glanced discreetly sideways at him as her mother’s theory of Tom’s singleton status came back to her. He was gazing across the bar into the void with a small smile on his face. Frankie stiffened. Was he enjoying this? She tried to edge away from him but only succeeded in jogging the man next to her. He glared at her while making a show of wiping the spillage from his hand.
‘Sorry,’ she said half-heartedly. She turned to Tom again. ‘Busy in here tonight, isn’t it?’
‘Of course, it’s the semi-final. We’d all come to hear your Girl Guide singing sensation.’
Frankie felt a ripple of guilt. It seemed Cassa wasn’t the only one to be disappointed tonight. She caught Joey’s attention and he strode over to her. Beneath the heat of the bar lights, his forehead shone with perspiration.
‘Hey, Frankie! Where’s our star?’
‘She couldn’t make it, I’m afraid.’
‘You’re joking! No? Now, that’s a shame. Everyone’s turned out to watch her. This is the busiest night I’ve had since we opened. What’s up with her?’
‘Laryngitis or something,’ she lied, surprised at the ease with which it rolled off her tongue. Probably because of the relief that she was ending their treachery. What harm could one more lie do?
Joey pulled a sympathetic face.
‘Poor love. I had her marked down to win. Never mind. C’est la vie, right? I’ll go tell the judges.’
‘Hey, what do I have to do to get served around here?’ Tom said, holding up his empty beer glass.
Joey winked at him.
‘You like yours with a bit of head, don’t you?’
Tom snorted and waved him away. Joey laughed and ducked under the bar flap without serving him.
A couple of minutes later the piercing whine of a microphone being switched on silenced the pub. Joey stepped up onto the stage.
‘Sorry to interrupt, folks. I’ve just been informed that Cassa won’t be taking part in the semi-final tonight—’
A wave of disgruntled mutterings rumbled through the crowd accompanied by a couple of boos.
‘I know, I know,’ Joey tried to placate them. ‘Unfortunately, she’s ill so is out of the competition. That means tonight won’t be a double elimination. But before we come to all that, please give it up for Russell!’
A few cheers went up from a corner, obviously the Russell camp, as Joey handed the mic over to the first contestant and jumped off the stage.
‘Well, I’m going to head off home,’ Frankie told Tom. ‘I’ll see you later.’
‘Actually, I don’t fancy sticking around. Cassa’s not singing and I can’t get a drink. Mind if I catch a lift with you?’
‘Sure. No problem.’
‘Great. I’ll just say goodbye to Joey.’
*
The car journey home was barely five minutes, yet Frankie felt she could almost make sand art with the tension in the small confines of the Mini. She searched for a neutral but interesting subject, but could only think of Rhys and giving him the ride on Peace Offering. If Tom did have a crush on her, she didn’t want to rub it in.
‘So, have you had any luck with your search for Adelaide Mann yet?’ she asked instead.
Tom shook his head.
‘I’m just about ready to give up. I’ve put my name down on all the forums and registers. There’s not much else I can do.’
‘Pity. You must be disappointed.’
He shrugged.
‘Like Joey always says, c’est la vie.’
‘Does Joey know?’ she asked in surprise.
Tom hesitated.
‘Kinda. You know how it is when you’ve had too much to drink.’
‘Gosh.’ Frankie blinked at the dark road in front of them. ‘I didn’t realise you and Joey were such good mates.’
Tom gave a wry chuckle.
‘Well, I don’t have you around so often these days. Since you’ve been dating Rhys, you’re hardly ever at the house.’
‘Oh, sorry.’
‘Forget it. It’s no big deal.’
The resignation in his voice caused a surge of compassion inside her.
‘Don’t say that. Of course it’s a big deal if you need someone to talk to.’
‘I have someone to talk to. Joey.’
‘Yes, but that’s not the same as having a friend to talk to.’
‘Frankie, being a barman doesn’t stop him from being a friend.’
‘I’m sorry. I–I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just that you and I have been friends for so long. You’ve been having such a rough time lately, and I haven’t helped matters by going out with Rhys…’ The words died on her lips.
Pulling up at a Give Way, she saw Tom looking confused.
‘I know it can’t be easy,’ she went on. ‘And I’m really sorry, Tom. I never knew you felt that way and when it finally dawned on me—well, it was too late. I’d never hurt you on purpose.’
‘What are you talking about? When did you find out?’ Tom’s tone shook with panic. Frankie decided it best not to tell him that her parents also knew about his crush.
‘A few weeks ago when you started spending so much time down at the pub. It’d never occurred to me that you never went out on dates or anything.’
‘Frankie, no one must know, you hear me!’
Surprised by his vehemence, she nodded profusely.
‘Of course, of course. If that’s what you want. There’s no shame in it though. Friends fall for each other all the time.’
Tom groaned and leant back in his seat.
‘I didn’t mean for it to happen. I didn’t even realise it was happening until Joey practically spelt it out to me.’
‘Wow, you do tell Joey an awful lot,’ Frankie said with a strangled laugh.
Tom shifted in his seat so he was facing her. With the glow of passing street lights, his face was lit with fear.
‘Frankie,’ he said breathlessly, ‘if you love me then you won’t tell anyone. I could lose my job.’
Frankie balked. Tom was being a bit over-dramatic, even by her standards.
‘I do love you, Tom,’ she said gently. ‘But I love you like a brother. And I know that it must feel pretty serious, but even if people did find out you had a crush on me, you wouldn’t lose your job. Rhys isn’t that revered in the weighing room.’
‘What?’
‘What?’
‘You think I’ve got a crush on you?’
Frankie shrugged, embarrassed.
‘Or in love with me, whichever you think you feel.’
Tom gave a harsh laugh of disbelief. Frankie pulled up in a parking space and switched off the engine. She looked at him properly for the first time. Something in his expression told her that hadn’t been the right thing to say.
‘You think I’m in love with you?’ Tom spluttered.
Doubt loomed.
‘Aren’t you?’
‘No, Frankie!’ he cried. ‘I’m gay!’
This time it was Frankie’s turn to be gobsmacked.
‘I thought that was what we were talking about,’ Tom said. ‘I thought you knew!’
‘You’re gay?’
‘Yes!’
‘But how? I mean, since when? Hav
e you always been gay? You used to date girls when we were teenagers.’
Tom fell back against the door and laughed. He dragged his fingers through his hair and shook his head at her.
‘I was confused back then. I didn’t know what I wanted. But then I met Joey, and well, then I knew.’
Frankie gasped as realisation hit her.
‘That’s why you were always at the Golden Miller! You weren’t drowning your sorrows because I was dating Rhys. You were there because of Joey!’
‘Pretty much, yeah.’
Frankie slapped her hand over her mouth.
‘Oh, my God. I’m such a fool.’
She giggled and Tom snorted.
‘Are you guys, you know, dating?’
Tom shrugged.
‘Yes and no. I haven’t exactly “come out” as they say. And you can’t tell anyone. Can you imagine the response I’ll get from the weighing room? There I am, valet to all these male jockeys, who have no qualms about getting naked in front of each other. But they might not be so indifferent if they knew I was gay.’
‘They don’t mind getting naked in front of me either, and I’m a girl.’
‘Yeah, but that’s different. Some guys might feel—I don’t know, threatened by a gay man being around while they’re getting changed.’
Frankie took a moment to imagine the scenario. The first person’s point of view she visualised was Rhys’s. She didn’t think he would be bothered which team Tom batted for, so long as he had clean breaches and the correct boots and saddles.
‘They might surprise you,’ she said. ‘They’re not a bad bunch of guys. The odd one, maybe, might be a bit of a drama queen—oops, sorry—but on the whole I’d say they probably wouldn’t care.’
Tom chewed his lip and continued to stare at her. She could see the desperate glint of his eyes in the darkness.
‘I don’t want to live a lie,’ he said. ‘I don’t want to pretend to be someone I’m not. I’ve spent my entire life not knowing who I am and now I’ve found Joey, it’s like the start of a new life, a real life. But it–it’s scary, you know? You don’t know what kind of response you might get. Hell, I haven’t even told my folks.’
Giving Chase (A Racing Romance) (Aspen Valley Series #2) Page 28
