The Adventures of Ferdinand Count Fathom — Volume 01

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The Adventures of Ferdinand Count Fathom — Volume 01 Page 32

by T. Smollett


  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  ANOTHER PROVIDENTIAL DELIVERANCE FROM THE EFFECTS OF THE SMUGGLER'SINGENIOUS CONJECTURE.

  During these deliberations, the wine merchant, with a view to make aparade of his superior parts and breeding, as well as to pave the way fora match at backgammon, made a tender of his snuff-box to our adventurer,and asked, in bad French, how he travelled from Paris. This questionproduced a series of interrogations concerning the place of Ferdinand'sabode in that city, and his business in England, so that he was fain topractise the science of defence, and answered with such ambiguity, asaroused the suspicion of the smuggler, who began to believe our hero hadsome very cogent reason for evading his curiosity; he immediately set hisreflection at work, and, after various conjectures, fixed upon Fathom'sbeing the Young Pretender. Big with this supposition, he eyed him withthe most earnest attention, comparing his features with those of theChevalier's portrait which he had seen in France, and though the faceswere as unlike as any two human faces could be, found the resemblance sostriking as to dispel all his doubts, and persuade him to introduce thestranger to some justice on the road; a step by which he would not onlymanifest his zeal for the Protestant succession, but also acquire thesplendid reward proposed by parliament to any person who should apprehendthat famous adventurer.

  These ideas intoxicated the brain of this man to such a pitch ofenthusiasm, that he actually believed himself in possession of the thirtythousand pounds, and amused his fancy with a variety of magnificentprojects to be executed by means of that acquisition, until his reveriewas interrupted by the halting of the coach at the inn where thepassengers used to eat their breakfasts. Waked as he was from the dreamof happiness, it had made such impression upon his mind, that, seeingFathom rise up with an intention to alight, he took it for granted hisdesign was to escape, and seizing him by the collar, called aloud forassistance in the King's name.

  Our hero, whose sagacity and presence of mind very often supplied theplace of courage, instead of being terrified at this assault, which mighthave disturbed the tranquillity of an ordinary villain, was so perfectlymaster of every circumstance of his own situation, as to know at oncethat the aggressor could not possibly have the least cause of complaintagainst him; and therefore, imputing this violence either to madness ormistake, very deliberately suffered himself to be made prisoner by thepeople of the house, who ran to the coach door in obedience to thesummons of the wine merchant. The rest of the company were struck dumbwith surprise and consternation at this sudden adventure; and the quaker,dreading some fell resistance on the side of the outlandish man, unpinnedthe other coach door in the twinkling of an eye, and trundled himselfinto the mud for safety. The others, seeing the temper and resignationof the prisoner, soon recovered their recollection, and began to inquireinto the cause of his arrest, upon which, the captor, whose teethchattered with terror and impatience, gave them to understand that he wasa state criminal, and demanded their help in conveying him to justice.

  Luckily for both parties, there happened to be at the inn a company ofsquires just returned from the death of a leash of hares, which they hadordered to be dressed for dinner, and among these gentlemen was one ofthe quorum, to whom the accuser had immediate recourse, marching beforethe captive, who walked very peaceably between the landlord and one ofhis waiters, and followed by a crowd of spectators, some of whom hadsecured the faithful Maurice, who in his behaviour closely imitated thedeliberation of his master. In this order did the procession advance tothe apartment in which the magistrate, with his fellows of the chase, satsmoking his morning pipe over a tankard of strong ale, and the smugglerbeing directed to the right person, "May it please your worship," saidhe, "I have brought this foreigner before you, on a violent suspicion ofhis being a proclaimed outlaw; and I desire, before these witnesses, thatmy title may be made good to the reward that shall become due upon hisconviction."

  "Friend," replied the justice, "I know nothing of you or your titles; butthis I know, if you have any information to give in, you must come to myhouse when I am at home, and proceed in a lawful way, that is, d'ye mindme, if you swear as how this here person is an outlaw; then if so be ashe has nothing to say to the contrary, my clerk shall make out amittimus, and so to jail with him till next 'size." "But, sir," answeredthe impeacher, "this is a case that admits of no delay; the person I haveapprehended is a prisoner of consequence to the state." "How, fellor!"cried the magistrate, interrupting him, "is there any person of moreconsequence than one of his Majesty's justices of the peace, who isbesides a considerable member of the landed interest! D'ye know, sirrah,who you are talking to? If you don't go about your business, I believe Ishall lay you by the heels."

  The smuggler, fearing his prize would escape through the ignorance,pride, and obstinacy of this country justice, approached his worship, andin a whisper which was overheard by all the company, assured him he hadindubitable reason to believe the foreigner was no other than thePretender's eldest son. At mention of this formidable name, everyindividual of the audience started, with signs of terror and amazement.The justice dropped his pipe, recoiled upon his chair, and, looking mostridiculously aghast, exclaimed, "Seize him, in the name of God and hisMajesty King George! Has he got no secret arms about him!"

  Fathom being thus informed of the suspicion under which he stood, couldnot help smiling at the eagerness with which the spectators flew uponhim, and suffered himself to be searched with great composure, wellknowing they would find no moveables about his person, but such as uponexamination would turn to his account; he therefore very calmly presentedto the magistrate his purse, and a small box that contained his jewels,and in the French language desired they might be preserved from the handsof the mob. This request was interpreted by the accuser, who, at thesame time, laid claim to the booty. The justice took charge of thedeposit, and one of his neighbours having undertaken the office of clerk,he proceeded to the examination of the culprit, whose papers were by thistime laid on the table before him. "Stranger," said he, "you standcharged with being son of the Pretender to these realms; what have you tosay in your own defence?" Our hero assured him, in the French language,that he was falsely impeached, and demanded justice on the accuser, who,without the least reason, had made such a malicious attack upon the lifeand honour of an innocent gentleman.

  The smuggler, instead of acting the part of a faithful interpreter, toldhis worship, that the prisoner's answer was no more than a simple denial,which every felon would make who had nothing else to plead in his ownbehalf, and that this alone was a strong presumption of his guilt,because, if he was not really the person they suspected him to be, thething would speak for itself, for, if he was not the Young Pretender, whothen was he? This argument had great weight with the justice, who,assuming a very important aspect, observed, "Very true, friend, if youare not the Pretender, in the name of God, who are you? One may see withhalf an eye that he is no better than a promiscuous fellow."

  Ferdinand now began to repent of having pretended ignorance of theEnglish language, as he found himself at the mercy of a rascal, who put afalse gloss upon all his words, and addressed himself to the audiencesuccessively in French, High Dutch, Italian, and Hungarian Latin,desiring to know if any person present understood any of these tongues,that his answers might be honestly explained to the bench. But he mighthave accosted them in Chinese with the same success: there was not oneperson present tolerably versed in his mother-tongue, much lessacquainted with any foreign language, except the wine merchant, who,incensed at this appeal, which he considered as an affront to hisintegrity, gave the judge to understand, that the delinquent, instead ofspeaking to the purpose, contumaciously insulted his authority in sundryforeign lingos, which he apprehended was an additional proof of his beingthe Chevalier's son, inasmuch as no person would take the pains to learnsuch a variety of gibberish, except with some sinister intent.

  This annotation was not lost upon the squire, who was too jealous of thehonour of his office to overlook such a flagr
ant instance of contempt.His eyes glistened, his cheeks were inflated with rage. "The case isplain," said he; "having nothing of signification to offer in his ownfavour, he grows refractory, and abuses the court in his base RomanCatholic jargon; but I'll let you know, for all you pretend to be aprince, you are no better than an outlawed vagrant, and I'll show youwhat a thing you are when you come in composition with an Englishjustice, like me, who have more than once extinguished myself in theservice of my country. As nothing else accrues, your purse, black box,and papers shall be sealed up before witnesses, and sent by express toone of his Majesty's secretaries of state; and, as for yourself, I willapply to the military at Canterbury, for a guard to conduct you toLondon."

  This was a very unwelcome declaration to our adventurer, who was on thepoint of haranguing the justice and spectators in their own language,when he was relieved from the necessity of taking that step by theinterposition of a young nobleman just arrived at the inn, who, beinginformed of this strange examination, entered the court, and, at firstsight of the prisoner, assured the justice he was imposed upon; for thathe himself had often seen the Young Pretender in Paris, and that therewas no kind of resemblance between that adventurer and the person nowbefore him. The accuser was not a little mortified at his lordship'saffirmation, which met with all due regard from the bench, though themagistrate took notice, that, granting the prisoner was not the YoungChevalier himself, it was highly probable he was an emissary of thathouse, as he could give no satisfactory account of himself, and waspossessed of things of such value as no honest man could expose to theaccidents of the road.

  Fathom, having thus found an interpreter, who signified to him, in theFrench tongue, the doubts of the justice, told his lordship, that hewas a gentleman of a noble house in Germany, who, for certain reasons,had come abroad incognito, with a view to see the world; and that,although the letters they had seized would prove the truth of thatassertion, he should be loth to expose his private concerns to theknowledge of strangers, if he could possibly be released without thatmortification. The young nobleman explained his desire to the court;but, his own curiosity being interested, observed, at the same time,that the justice could not be said to have discharged the duties of hisstation, until he should have examined every circumstance relating to theprisoner. Upon which remonstrance, he was requested by the bench toperuse the papers, and accordingly communicated the substance of oneletter to this effect:--

  "MY DEAR SON,--Though I am far from approving the rash step you havetaken in withdrawing yourself from your father's house, in order to avoidan engagement which would have been equally honourable and advantageousto your family, I cannot so far suppress my affection, as to bear thethought of your undergoing those hardships which, for your disobedience,you deserve to suffer. I have therefore, without the knowledge of yourfather, sent the bearer to attend you in your peregrinations; hisfidelity you know hath been tried in a long course of service, and I haveentrusted to his care, for your use, a purse of two hundred ducats, and abox of jewels to the value of twice that sum, which, though notsufficient to support an equipage suitable to your birth, will, at leastfor some time, preserve you from the importunities of want. When you aredutiful enough to explain your designs and situation, you may expectfurther indulgence from your tender and disconsolate mother,-- COUNTESS OF FATHOM."

  This letter, which, as well as the others, our hero had forged for thepurpose, effectually answered his intent, in throwing dust in the eyesand understanding of the spectators, who now regarded the prisoner withlooks of respectful remorse, as a man of quality who had been falselyaccused. His lordship, to make a parade of his own politeness andimportance, assured the bench, he was no stranger to the family of theFathoms, and, with a compliment, gave Ferdinand to understand he hadformerly seen him at Versailles. There being no longer room forsuspicion, the justice ordered our adventurer to be set at liberty, andeven invited him to be seated, with an apology for the rude manner inwhich he had been treated, owing to the misinformation of the accuser,who was threatened with the stocks, for his malice and presumption.

  But this was not the only triumph our hero obtained over the winemerchant. Maurice was no sooner unfettered, than, advancing into themiddle of the room, "My lord," said he, addressing himself in French tohis master's deliverer, "since you have been so generous as to protect anoble stranger from the danger of such a false accusation, I hope youwill still lay an additional obligation upon the Count, by retorting thevengeance of the law upon his perfidious accuser, whom I know to be atrader in those articles of merchandise which are prohibited by theordinances of this nation. I have seen him lately at Boulogne, and amperfectly well acquainted with some persons who have supplied him withFrench lace and embroidery; and, as a proof of what I allege, I desireyou will order him and this barber, who is his understrapper, to beexamined on the spot."

  This charge, which was immediately explained to the bench, yieldedextraordinary satisfaction to the spectators, one of whom, being anofficer of the customs, forthwith began to exercise his function upon theunlucky perruquier, who, being stripped of his upper garments, and evenof his shirt, appeared like the mummy of an Egyptian king, most curiouslyrolled up in bandages of rich figured gold shalloon, that covered theskirts of four embroidered waistcoats. The merchant, seeing hisexpectation so unhappily reversed, made an effort to retire with a mostrueful aspect, but was prevented by the officer, who demanded theinterposition of the civil power, that he might undergo the sameexamination to which the other had been subjected. He was accordinglyrifled without loss of time, and the inquiry proved well worth the careof him who made it; for a considerable booty of the same sort ofmerchandise was found in his boots, breeches, hat, and between thebuckram and lining of his surtout. Yet, not contented with this prize,the experienced spoiler proceeded to search his baggage, and, perceivinga false bottom in his portmanteau, detected beneath it a valuableaccession to the plunder he had already obtained.

 

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