Unsaid

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by Avery Aster


  “I told you what I wanted, yet you pushed me away.” His intentions were relentless. He was going to get what was his and what he’d wanted.

  “I’m scared you’ll change your mind. You’ll wake up one day and want something else...as Diego did.”

  His friend’s mouth dipped into a deeper frown, one he didn’t think was possible. Blake sat up to leave, giving off the vibe he found their conversation futile, not expecting it to go anywhere.

  But he pulled Blake’s face closer to his and looked deep into his eyes. “I’ve wanted you for the last ten years.” Realizing that was when Blake usually walked off, he lifted his right leg up and over Blake’s lower body, locking him in and keeping him from going anywhere.

  Blake’s back fell against the pillows.

  He declared, “I’m confident I won’t waiver on my dedication to you.”

  “Really?” Blake’s eyebrows drew up as one.

  “I am not MLD. I’m not going to use you for your money. I have my own. I promise you, I will never do the sick things that man has done.”

  White teeth flashed. He wasn’t quite there yet, as he sensed Blake held back.

  “I don’t have intimacy issues, either.”

  “Shush.” Blake put his hand over Miguel’s lips. “I haven’t been honest about what I want from you. Remember when I said my ex invited strangers over to our house twenty-four-seven? He rubbed my face in it.”

  It pained him to hear this again. “Sí. But you’re okay now. That’s all that matters.”

  “I don’t feel okay. I feel foolish for wanting something so traditional. I know I have to let that dream go.”

  “Why?”

  “’Cause it’s not part of our culture. Gay marriage is silly. Monogamy between two men is unrealistic.”

  Blake sounded like so many of the men he’d been with over the years. Jaded.

  “You want conventional,” he muttered under Blake’s fingers. He kissed his pointer then his middle finger.

  “Don’t laugh. I know you’re a playboy, Mig.”

  “Perhaps at one time I was.” He didn’t have any answers for why he’d gone with the flow. Why he hadn’t stood up to Diego years before. Why he hadn’t confessed his love for Blake earlier. His value system was the same as Blake’s all along. He’d just taken the long road to get there.

  “Having one partner your whole life seems insane. I know, what, maybe twenty gay couples? None are exclusive. But it’s what I’ve always wanted. It’s just not meant to be.” Blake reeked of hopelessness.

  He removed Blake’s hand from his lips with a nipping bite. “I’m not laughing.” He kissed his hand again and held on to it. “Do you remember at the Exhale Bliss Spa, I told you I didn’t think you knew me very well?” He pushed his body up over his as they became horizontal. With forceful intention, he rested his weight down over him. His friend’s face reddened as he squirmed.

  Blake rolled his watery eyes. “I know you.”

  “No, bebé, you don’t. You’ve never asked me what I want in a relationship. You based my future on my past.”

  “Meaning?” Blake locked his feet with his, accepting his captivity.

  “There’s no one I’d rather have more than you. I’ve wanted you my entire life. I’ll only want you.”

  “Promise?” Blake sounded tentative-optimistic.

  “Us was my whole goal this week. Not to break in your ass, though your virgin bottom was tempting. I wanted to show you my heart.” He glided his thumb over Blake’s right eyebrow. “Show you how much I’ve always wanted you and still do.” A deep peace came over him, one he’d hoped for and struggled to secure for as long as he could remember. “You’re very special to me, and I can’t imagine my life without you.”

  “I love you, Mig. I always have.” Blake leaned up and continued, “I don’t want to get hurt.”

  “I love you, too.” He wrapped Blake in his arms and sank his tongue into his mouth with a passionate kiss. He closed his eyes for a second, allowing himself to experience something new—love. He made love bites at his neck and then said, “I won’t ever hurt you, unless you want me to.” He laughed at his BDSM implication.

  “So, we can be piggy with one another...but no one else.”

  “That’s my dream.”

  He heard the door open and turned a frown toward whoever was intruding on their intimate moment.

  “There you two are. Stop fucking and come outside!” Thor shouted, flicking the bathroom lights on and off.

  “Why outside?” he asked.

  “Massimo has a fireworks show across the street in Central Park. Let’s go.”

  “Of course he does.” He helped Blake to his feet and asked, “You okay?”

  “Yes, I’m better than okay. Wanna know why?”

  “Why?”

  “Because I’m moving in with you.”

  His heart felt as it was a part of the fireworks, exploding with joy as he embraced Blake.

  They ran out of The Plaza, crossed the street, and went into Central Park just as the first burst of firecrackers lit the sky. He held Blake’s hand. Instead of looking up at the sky, he glanced out at his friends. Taddy and Warner kissed passionately as if they’d just met. Lex and Massimo danced to the cheers of onlookers and Birdie Easton stared at him for a second before extending a thumbs-up to say he’d done A-Okay.

  Thank You, Paloma Tittoni

  One Week Later in Sitges, Spain

  On Miguel’s thirtieth birthday, the first he’d celebrated since he was a kid, he held his boyfriend’s hand and walked down the sandy beach. His Barcelona exhibit was a triumph. His parents, along with Inez, Cierra, and Ofielia, came to Spain. Mr. and Mrs. Morgan came and attempted to buy up the art which didn’t sell within the first hour. To his fortune, the art gallery owner had pre-sold the pieces; about eighty percent of them. The New York tabloids hit with pictures of Blake on his arm after the royal wedding, tagging Miguel Santana as their generation’s Salvador Dali. Diego’s trial was set to begin in three months, and Vive had only tried to leave rehab once. But she went right back in and kept at it.

  There was only one more thing he needed before he’d be at complete bliss.

  He stopped and gripped Blake’s hips, pulling his long legs close. He wouldn’t let him run away. Barefoot, he pressed his toes over Blake’s in the sand, keeping him captive.

  “Mig,” he said, wiggling. Blake’s cheeks flushed, creating a contrast against his fair skin.

  “I need to ask you something.” He felt hot tears fall down his cheeks as a knot formed in stomach.

  Wiping his face, Blake asked, “I’ve never seen you cry. Isn’t that my job? We’ve celebrated your success every night this week here in Spain. Why the tears?”

  His boyfriend was clueless as usual.

  “You said you’d never get married again.” As the words began to run together to form a sentence, he gathered his usual confidence, remembering the toast he’d made to his family at his coming-out dinner, to live life. “But I’m hoping this time it’ll stick.”

  Blake’s jaw hung open. “Miguel—”

  “Mr. Morgan…I’ve loved you since the first day I met you.” He dug into his pocket and pulled out a gold band. Holding it in his hand, the metal shimmered against the sunset as a promise for a good tomorrow. “Will you marry me?”

  His boyfriend’s brows arched up in surprise. After a few silent moments he said, “Under one condition.”

  “Anything…”

  “I want a baby within our first year together,” Blake pressed on.

  He felt light on his feet.

  “Sí, of course.” He didn’t imagine the Santana-Morgan family starting off any other way.

  “Then yes, I’ll marry you!”

  Miguel kissed him and slipped the ring on his finger. It was a perfect fit.

  “Is this from the Paloma Tittoni gem store?”

  He laughed and hugged his fiancé.

  Muchas gracias, Señor Manuel for insp
iring my beloved Mexican hero Miguel Santana in Unsaid. You are mucho caliente. I love you more than Tucson. Thank you, Dom Edward and Master Elliot for all of your fisting, electricity, and water sports advice because this novel wouldn’t be the same without your BDSM insights. As always, huge hugs to my lifelong friend Julie, since my characters would be lost without you and so would I. Many kudos to my beta-readers, Nicole, Chrissy, Jackie, Jodie, Kateria, Jenifer, and everyone on Wattpad.

  As well as to the book reviewers at S&M’s Book Obsessions, I Love Lady Porn, Harlequin Junkies, Book Whores, Kricket's Chirps, Under the Covers, Midwest Book Reviews, The Book Enthusiast, We Love Kink, Romance Reviews Today, Ever After Romance, Swept Away by Romance, USA Today Happily Ever After, Reviews by Crystal, Storm Goddess, and Please Another Book for the wonderful media coverage on The Manhattanites series.

  Great appreciation to Marisa Corvisiero, an amazing literary agent and lawyer who wears designer smarty pants and I adore you for it. Thank you J.B. for putting up with me while I write. Courtney Howell, I enjoyed the crack of your whip, and I thank you kindly. Big hugs to Chris Jacen who critiqued an earlier version of this manuscript, Stacy D. Holmes, and Kristin at Hot Tree Editing for your amazing editorial services. Your feedback changed Blake’s life from drab to fab. And to my family and friends who championed this novel: George, Pauline, Adam, Julie, Bailee, Sara, Kelly, Shari, Pat, Hector, Lynn, Michele, Holly, Nackie and Shane…love you, always.

  New York Times bestselling author Avery Aster pens The Manhattanites, a contemporary erotic romance series of full-length, stand-alone novels, and the naughty new adult prequel companion series The Undergrad Years.

  As a resident of New York City and a graduate from New York University, Avery gives readers an inside look at the city’s glitzy nightlife, socialite sexcapades and tall tales of the über-rich and ultra-famous.

  Newsletter: http://eepurl.com/CQ665

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  in The Undergrad Years series

  Love, Lex

  Yours Truly, Taddy

  XO, Blake

  Always & Forever, Vive

  in The Manhattanites series

  Unscrupulous

  Undressed

  Unsaid

  Unconventional

  Unique

  Uncensored

  Craving more of The Manhattanites? Enjoy the first two chapters of Unconventional.

  Unconventional

  by Avery Aster

  From the NYT Bestselling author of The Manhattanites series and for fans of such films as Vicky Cristina Barcelona and Wild Things comes a ménage romance posing the question; can two men share the same woman forever?

  They are the best of friends and the greatest of lovers. Two men and one woman, searching for fortune and fame, bound together by an eroticism their money and power can’t buy them. Luigi, the romantic alpha hunk. Rocco, the exotic bisexual. Jemma, the insatiable beauty who possesses them both.

  From their first rendezvous in Milan, the three set out on a wicked course, jet-setting from the kinky underground sex clubs of Berlin, to the lavish palaces of Moscow, to New York’s high society in pursuit of pleasure. They have only each other to care for. That is…until a baby comes along and changes their destiny. But which of them is the father? And will they continue their poly relationship or give in to convention?

  Luigi Bova (39): Jemma and Rocco’s rich and powerful lover who operates the Girasoli Garment Company. He’ll do anything to have Jemma’s hand in marriage and give her the stability she’s always yearned for. But will it be at Rocco’s expense or his own?

  Rocco Cazzo (29): Hunk du jour and making no apologies about it, he’s the House of Tittoni’s estate manager. Enjoying being with his first and only girlfriend, Jemma, he desperately wants to have children and start a family.

  Jemma Fereti (37): A former supermodel turned fashion designer at Girasoli Garments. As a breast cancer survivor, she lives life to the fullest, especially when it comes to loving two men at the same time.

  Lex Easton (30): Owner of Easton Essentials, she’s a fashionista who’s married to Prince Massimo Tittoni and doing her best to keep the fashion empire she co-created relevant.

  Prince Massimo (36): Husband to Lex, CEO of Girasoli Garments, royal heir to the House of Tittoni and ruler of Isola di Girasoli. He’s Luigi, Rocco, and Jemma’s boss.

  Taddy Brill (30): A diva millionaire who dates billionaire Warner Truman. She is the owner of Brill, Inc., the PR firm which promotes Jemma Couture. Whatever Taddy says, goes!

  Blake Morgan III (29): Engaged to his boyfriend, Miguel Santana, he graduated from Columbia University and works as Managing Partner at Brill, Inc. He’s doing his best to keep Jemma calm.

  Vive Farnworth (30): A former party girl and heiress to Farnworth Firewater liquors. She’s the Editor-in-Chief of Debauchery Magazine who writes the nasty review which could ruin Jemma’s career.

  Jemma Couture: Europe’s most exclusive high-end fashion line for women. It retails to all the luxury boutiques in the world.

  Girasoli Garment Company: A one-hundred-year-old textile manufacturer and owner of Jemma Couture. They also own Easton Essentials.

  Brill, Inc.: A Fortune 500 company and New York’s eminent fashion and beauty public relations and branding firm, which is retained by Girasoli Garments.

  Debauchery Magazine: Read by four million people weekly, covering all things salacious in the fashion, beauty and celebrity arena.

  Isola di Girasoli: A Mediterranean island south of Sicily and east of Tunisia. Formerly the Republic of Girasoli, today it is united with Italy. It is one-hundred-twenty-five square miles accessible via boat or air. In the eighteenth century, it was founded as a sunflower plantation, and today it is a resort and casino vacation destination.

  Milan: Home to such fashion super-brands as Prada, Armani and Dolce & Gabbana, Milan remains the world’s fashion capital. Its elite fashion district is the “quadrilatero della moda” and the city’s common area has a population of about 1.3 million. It is the headquarters for Girasoli Garment Company and the location for the House of Tittoni’s estate.

  Manhattan: Its population is about 1.5 million (excluding all areas off the island). It is the launch pad for such iconic fashion designers as Donna Karan, Calvin Klein, Betsey Johnson, Michael Kors, Marc Jacobs and countless others. It is the headquarters for Easton Essentials, Brill Inc, Debauchery Magazine and the US offices of Jemma Couture.

  Dear Readers,

  Luigi, Rocco, and Jemma were introduced as part of the supporting cast in my novel, Undressed (Massimo & Lex). They’re back with more drama, Italian style and getting their own story. This time, Jemma gets pregnant. Unsure which boyfriend is the father, will this be the end of their poly relationship or just the beginning? Find out in Unconventional.

  Love,

  Avery

  LET’S

  a love poem

  I’LL…unease you, totally tease you

  MEN…look at me, want to make love to me

  WOMEN…want to be me, hate me

  Let’s not dance around the subject

  YOU…may lust after me, maybe even marry me, I’ll carry your baby

  HOW DID WE…veer this far left, get so fucked up

  WE…started the relationship out so right, ended so wrong

  Let’s try again

  MAKE.....your dreams come true, alleviate your worst fears

  PLEASE…warm my heart, try not to smash it, too

  Let’s mend our broken hearts

  FLASHBACKS…to our passionate nights, to when you found mer />
  AS LOVERS…we know no shame, we don’t place blame, we have this secret place in time

  NEVER…hesitate to be the one, take my soul apart

  Let’s set our secrets free

  FEELS LIKE…something so right, total submission and satisfaction

  THESE DREAMS…like perfume on my wrist, are closer than this

  YOU SAY…I’m crazy, that I’m in the danger zone

  Let’s open the door

  I KNOW…I’m loving like never before, we belong together

  MANY TIMES…I feel alone without you at my side, I speak of aberrant behavior

  ARE YOU…hot tonight, feeling naughty

  I…want you, gotta have you

  YOU ARE MY…devotion, lover

  LET’S…be forever

  A Girl Just Wants To Have Fun!

  “Since Jemma’s cancer diagnosis, we often compare her to silent screen goddess Jean Harlow or late heartthrob River Phoenix. She lives life in the fast lane, enjoying each day as it comes. I know she fears that one day it’ll end. Maybe that’s why getting tied down with two husbands and a baby wasn’t on her short list of things to do. But as any fabulous Manhattanite will tell you, life is a challenge—meet it head-on. Life is a dream—own your desires. Life is a gift—keep giving to others. Life is love—open your heart.”—Taddy Brill, CEO of Brill, Inc., girlfriend to Big Daddy, and overall bestie to Lex, Blake, and Vive.

  Jemma, Will You Marry Us?

  Luigi

  Three Months Ago

  Isola di Girasoli, Mediterranean Sea

  On top of the cliff, overlooking the blue sea, I grabbed my boyfriend’s hand, pulled him to my side and asked, “Ready, bello?”

  Rocco’s short nails grazed my skin. He’d been biting them all week. He always did when he was nervous.

  “Jemma is going to say yes…” he whispered in my ear.

  “Sì, of course she is.”

 

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