I stepped into the flood of water and all the thoughts and feelings I'd been holding back let loose. That I had fallen for a man who only wanted me for one thing. A man I could never have any kind of future with. For god's sake, the end of us was already carved in stone…
I leaned against the cold shower wall and the fear washed over me. The thing I'd known deep down from the start, but hadn't mattered until now…
That if I failed to conceive, he was free to end our agreement at any time. It was a baby he wanted, after all. Not me.
And if I couldn't give him what he needed, there was nothing to stop him, from letting me go. And replacing me with a different surrogate.
Another woman. One who could make his dreams come true.
31
Jack
By Tuesday we were back on the island. The good news was that Mokita was back to her old self, full of energy and curiosity. Libby and I shared duties, feeding her, taking her outside to play… and keeping vigilant watch on her at all times. We would rest when she did, all of us collapsing into Libby's bed in the afternoons. Although I hadn't expected it, having the puppy's constant needs to focus on, made it somewhat easier for Libby and I to ignore the powerful attraction between us. We lavished all our affection on Moki instead, and while the puppy basked in the attention, Libby and I kept a friendly distance between us.
The bad news was that the papers Spencer had promised me on Monday, still hadn't arrived. He and Blake reassured me they'd be faxed over before the end of the business day. And while my brother was plenty distracted by his brand-new engagement to Janet, I had complete confidence in them both. Still, I wanted it fucking done. In the old days, I'd have flown back and closed the deal myself. But I was enjoying living like a family man. Even if it wasn't the real thing. Even if it was just a different kind of business deal…
With the merger set to wrap up tonight, I'd made the decision. That the timing would be perfect, to confirm the other deal as well. We'd waited long enough and I was more than ready to know for sure. I wanted Libby to take the test in the morning, and I'd planned for us to take a long hike around the island to bring up the suggestion. The man who had given us Moki in the first place had agreed to watch over her, and I was damned excited at the idea of having Libby, finally, all to myself. She was waiting for me in the foyer, dressed in a pink tank and chocolate brown shorts. My hands itched to peel the thin straps off her shoulders… Instead, I handed her one of the water bottles.
"Here," I said, tucking a wide brimmed hat over her curls. She looked up at me from under the edge. Faint dark smudges showed under her eyes, but they were wide and beautiful.
"There are flamingos in the shallow water near the cove," I told her, shrugging into the backpack that carried our lunch. "Tortoises too… and lemurs further inland." I took her hand. It felt so small in mine. "The island is small enough we can cover a lot in one day of easy walking." We headed out into a gentle breeze and a brilliantly blue sky. "I brought suits and towels...We can swim if you like."
We walked hand in hand, following the thin trail that lead to the cove. It wasn't far from the spot where I'd gone to swim alone that night. The night I'd admitted the truth of how I felt about Libby. It was the first time I'd said the words aloud. And it had been the last time…
"Oh… look…!" She let go of my hand and pointed just beyond the flowering shrubs. "There are so many…" The water was a swirl of bright pink as hundreds of flamingoes fed and preened in the shallows. "I've never seen anything so incredible, Jack."
"Come on." I took her hand, pleased with how excited she was. "They're fairly used to people. And we can swim right over there," I pointed. "And have lunch in the shade."
We headed down slowly. The path down was steep and I kept her safely behind me until we reached the sand. Her cheeks were pink with effort, her lips moist and parted. I put my hands around her waist and lifted her down over the last few rocks. The feeling of her hands against my chest made me hungry for her skin…
"God, it's so beautiful here…," she breathed. Together we looked out over the water. "I never thought these places were real, you know? Just photographs in magazines…"
"We can stay, until it's time for your first checkup. And even come back afterwards, if you'd like." I spread a huge blanket in the tiny clearing, sheltered all around by tall trees. Then I took our suits out of the pack and held hers out. She shook her head, not looking into my eyes. "Mine's on underneath," she said, as she unzipped her shorts. They dropped to her ankles and she kicked them aside. Then she peeled off the tank top. Just the way I had wanted to…
The suit she wore was all one piece, almost the same creamy color of her skin. Only a pale string of printed lilac flowers kept her from looking totally naked. They travelled from her shoulder across her breasts and down to her hip… Standing there, near the tropical blooms and with the blue water behind her, she could have been Eve... in the garden…
I tossed my trunks away with a smile and peeled off my shirt and shorts. The slim black briefs I wore were more than enough. I took her hand and we ran for the water together. Everything seemed perfect. And I suddenly felt happier than I could ever remember.
"Let me go…!" She laughed as I caught at her hips, pulling her against me. "I'm hungry and I want to see what's in that backpack…"
She was halfway back to the beach, but I held her tight. We'd played in the water like a couple of kids and I wasn't ready to let her go. "It's just cold chicken and lemonade," I coughed as she splashed water in my face. "It can wait… but so help me I don't think I can…"
She was breathless and laughing too as she struggled in my arms. For one more second, it was just innocent fun. But the feel of her breasts against my chest as she fought against me suddenly changed everything. I held her and she held me back. Our chests rose and fell together as we caught our breath. Her nipples were hard against me and there was no denying the hardness of my cock pressing into her belly.
"We were keeping it simple…," I breathed out. Her lips were so fucking close. "But we seem to keep finding ourselves here, wanting more…"
"Jack…" She started but didn't finish. I could see the same look in her eyes that had been there since Moki had gotten sick. Hesitant, troubled somehow. Even with the pleasure of the day, it was still there.
"You can tell me, you know. Anything that you need… anything I can do. I know you're still worried about the puppy, sweetheart. She's fine now, she really is. But maybe it's been too stressful, along with the pregnancy."
I watched her mouth open as she took in a breath. Then she pressed her lips together and frowned. "I love her, Jack. She'd never be too much, no matter what. I love… that you gave her to me."
"But there's still something wrong… I can see it… Are you feeling okay? What can I can do to help?" I tipped her face to mine. "There's nothing I wouldn't do…"
I watched her struggle a moment longer. I held her close and her hands were gripping my arms. "I just want to give you everything you deserve, Jack. You've already given me so much." She dipped her head. "I want you to have the family you've dreamed of. I want to give you that so much…" She looked up, her eyes moist. "You've become so important to me… as my friend. And that I want to give you everything you need, too…
Will you be with me, Jack? Just one more time… Not about the baby, and not about some contract between us…
But just because you want me… and because I want you too?"
32
Libby
I don't know what I'd have done if he'd pulled away. It had taken everything inside me to ask for what I needed. Thank god, I never had to find out. He was kissing me before I'd gotten all the words out.
"Fuck, sweetheart," he growled the words against my throat as he caught me up in his arms. The water roiled around us as he carried me back up the beach, to the clearing where we'd left our things. He put me on my feet in the middle of the blanket and stepped back, just enough to singe my whole body with the f
ire in his eyes. "You have no fucking idea how much I want you right now… how fucking bad I need to…"
He was streaming water. It ran from his hair, down his chest. The muscles at his waist turned it inward so that it drew my eyes to the huge bulge barely contained by his briefs. I started to reach for him, brazen with need… with hunger…
"No." He stopped me with one word. I met his eyes and they were burning with the same desperation I felt. He smiled darkly, teasing me...daring me…
"Strip for me," he ordered. His voice was soft, but the tone left no room for argument. "You're fucking wet and I can see how much you want this. So strip off that soaking swimsuit and let me look at you."
I hesitated only at the change in him. That, and how this new side of him made me feel. I didn't think I could want this anymore than I already did. I was wrong.
"Slow, sweetheart. Turn your ass to me and take it off slowly… Just like that… Fuck, Libby, you're so fucking beautiful."
I bent forward, farther than I needed to and eased the fabric over the curve of my ass. Then I spread my feet apart and bent a little lower… I felt his huge warm hands warm on me, and for the first time in my life, I was grateful for my generous curves. He stroked my ass gently, reaching around to cup my breasts.
"I could touch you like this forever and never get enough," he growled. "I need your skin… the way you taste... "He turned me to face him. "Like this, under the sky, free and perfect. The way it should be. The way I always imagined it could be…"
I reached up to tangle my hands in his hair. His mouth was salty and delicious. I knew the rest of him would taste the same. And if this was the last time, I wanted to be able to remember… I reached to him, sliding my fingers under the elastic. He groaned as I bared him and took him in my hands.
"Lick me," he gasped out. I was already on my knees. "Oh, fuck, sweetheart…"
I ached to swallow him whole, but held back, licking the length of him with the very tip of my tongue. He was salty, slippery, the head of his cock dark and angry from having to wait. I slid my hands up the inside of his thighs and felt him swell in my mouth.
He shifted his body, moving me with his hands so I could keep his cock trapped where it was. But in seconds I was on my back, his mouth on my pussy and his huge cock still in my mouth. He rocked his hips gently, careful not to go too far… but his mouth punished my clit with everything he was holding back. His lips worked me hard, his tongue reached up inside me. He held my ass in his hands, pressing me to him relentlessly as he built me up to the edge. Just as I came, he slipped his cock from my mouth, letting me cry out as it hit me. But even before it had finished, I felt something deep in my belly… an emptiness that only he had the power to fill…
"Fuck me," I begged, grasping at him. "Oh, Jack...I need you to fill me up and fuck me now…"
He had me on my knees in a fast second and buried himself in me with one hard thrust. I bent forward, arching my back, my body begging him for more. "God, yes… just… fuck… me…"
He rocked me with his thrusts, pounding his full length into me. There was no thought, only pure need and the undeniable force of desire. My breasts shook with every jolt. He leaned into me and took them in his hands, feeling their weight and their movement as he took me. He was swelling with every thrust and I could feel his huge head buried high and deep in me. Neither of us had much time left…
Then, after one last deep thrust, he pulled out. My whole body cried out with the loss of him. But he turned me onto my back and let his cock pound against my hip, slowing himself so he could kiss me… I could taste us both on his lips.
Sliding his body along mine, he let the heat of his cock find its way, slowly now… more gently. What had been the hard driving fuck I'd begged him for, was changing now. Into something else. Something I wasn't even brave enough to name. I spread my legs, lifting them high, opening myself to him… I'd never felt so free… or so totally vulnerable.
"I want you like nothing I've ever wanted…. Need you like nothing I've ever needed…" His words were sweet in my ear. Everything in me wanted to believe it was true. That I could be enough, just as I was. He made me feel like… just maybe… it could be true.
"My beautiful, beautiful wife." He buried his face in my breasts and I wrapped myself around him. He slid into me gently this time, filling me until the tears ran from the corners of my eyes.
But there was no patience left in either of us. We moved together, building fast with a need that drove us both. There was no more waiting, no more holding back. I clutched at his back as my orgasm hit, feeling him empty himself inside me. With every stroke, he pulsed his seed.
We held on, as everything in the world shattered but us.
He reached over to tuck my hair behind my ear. It was a simple gesture, but I'd grown so used to it. I rested my head on his chest, holding on for as long as I could, to the warm, safe feeling I had in his arms.
We had spent the entire afternoon together on the beach, naked under the trees. No matter how much we gave, it was never enough. I couldn't get my fill of him. We'd given up the pretense of going to our separate rooms, so when the light had faded, we'd climbed the stairs to his room. Even now, I could feel his cock stirring, ready for more.
He eased himself down along my side until his mouth reached my nipple. He teased it lazily with his tongue. He wrapped his hands around my whole breast, pushing the nipple up, sucking… nuzzling… "God, sweetheart… you were made for this…"
He took his time, giving both my tight, aching nipples the attention they needed. He ran his hands over me, just taking in the feel of my skin. It felt like he wanted to know me, just by touch… the way I might explore a sculpture with my own hands. I touched him too, letting our pleasure build more slowly now, more deeply than before. We had the whole night ahead of us…
"Libby, my beautiful girl," he pulled me on top of him and took my face on his hands. He kissed my mouth… my cheeks… my forehead. My breasts were huge soft mounds on the hardness of his chest and I had his heavy cock trapped between my thighs. "I wish we could stay here like this… just like this…" He kissed me again. "I know I promised we could stay the whole month, but…"
"What is it, Jack?" I pushed back to see his face. "What's happened?"
"Nothing, probably…" He played with one of my curls. "But I should fly back, just for a day or two. To get the Warner deal done." He frowned. "I should have finished it before we left. But I had… other things on my mind…" He rolled me underneath him.
"You could come with me, if you like. Moki, too." He rubbed his erection against me and I felt another wave of hunger roll through me. "It's just about time for you to take your first test too… If you come with me, we can have it done in the clinic. And be absolutely sure." He slipped inside me easily and I arched against him. "That you've got my baby inside you, sweetheart…"
My body responded to his shamelessly, all the while my mind racing. I was terrified to take another test so soon, afraid that it would still be negative. Only the clinical insemination had been during the right time of the month for me to conceive. What were the chances of getting pregnant after that? No matter how amazing it was.... making love to this beautiful man…
I held on, meeting every thrust of his body with the forceful need of my own. He held me, kissing me, devouring me, pushing me to beyond my limits. I don't know which drove me hardest… fear or desire. But I gave in to them both. And when he looked into my eyes and thrust inside me with everything he had, he made his demand.
"Come with me," he ordered. "Now." He thrust again hard. "Now."
And I did.
The contract Spencer had promised Jack was waiting in the fax machine by morning. But he'd already set the trip back home in motion. The pilot, Davis, would be here with the helicopter within the hour.
"You're sure I can't convince you?" He poured me a glass of orange juice and heaped my plate with scrambled eggs. "Moki's in perfect health, aren't you girl?" He rubbed her ears
and she squirmed with delight. "They can take care of her here, or she could come with us." He put his hand over mine, his eyes serious. "I don't like the idea of leaving you here alone."
I finished my juice and felt my stomach turn uneasily. "I won't be alone, Jack. There's staff on the island. And you'll only be gone for a day or so." I swallowed as liquid pooled in the back of my throat. "We'll be fine here. I'll rest and I can work up in my studio." I smiled reassuringly. "You're going to be busy in the office anyway. You do still have a company to run…"
He finished his breakfast and cleared the dishes away. He smiled at my uneaten eggs, his eyes bright, hopeful.
"You'll call me, if you need me… if there's anything at all…" He held my chin. "And we'll take that test just as soon as I get back." He kissed me easily, his eyes so warm, so trusting. "I can't wait for you to tell me I'm going to be a father."
"I promise," I replied, nodding firmly. "I think I want that almost as much as you do…"
He took my hand, the one with the emerald, and kissed the back of it. Then he turned it over, and kissed the center of my palm… His mouth was so warm, there was something so intimate in the gesture. I fought back the tears that stung the backs of my eyes and forced myself to give him the bright smile he deserved.
He smiled back and kissed my lips, quickly, lightly. Then he reached for the overnight bag waiting by the door. We could hear the helicopter in the distance… he needed to be waiting by the pad.
The Baby Contract Page 12
