by Janeal Falor
“We’ll find out tomorrow.”
I’m exhausted. I spent all night running in my First Queen dream—running because I could and because she was there. No matter how far I went, though, Androlla was always there, hovering.
Inkga helps me get ready through my sleepiness. A healer comes in to help move my limbs, to keep my muscles active. Then a servant picks me up and puts me in my chair. Inkga wheels me into the sitting room, where Nash and Venda are sitting with a big pile of books. Nash is holding one open partway through.
“What have you there?” I ask.
“Wula brought them in while you were getting ready,” he says.
It’s so good to see him up and about, without having to request his presence. I hate that it’s because I was poisoned, but some good seems to have come of it. “Wonderful. I want to try the luck charm again, but afterward, I’d like to read through some of those books and see what we can find before I have to go to my meeting this afternoon.”
“Sounds like a good plan.” Nash puts his book down and gets out the supplies.
Inkga places me by the table and then takes a seat next to Venda, eagerly watching Nash’s movements. Would other people be this excited for magic, or would they really cower in fear of what it could do?
I’m not sure I’m brave enough to find out.
It doesn’t matter, anyway. I need the magic. The country needs it, to get out from under Androlla’s control. I don’t have to force it on anyone, but it still has to come about. The fingers of my left hand twitch, and I realize I’m trying to twist the wooden ring I found in the treasury on my right ring finger. At some point it became a habit to twist it, and I didn’t know it.
Nash brings the urta bark, rosemary, and mirror to me. While he holds the mirror with one hand, he uses the other to help me grasp the ingredients. I crunch it, working to squeeze my hand together over and over again, chanting like Venda did last time. It doesn’t take long before my muscles grow sore and my fingers tremble under the strain, but I am moving them, which is more than I did yesterday.
“Is that enough?” I ask Venda.
“If you have placed some of yourself in it, then yes. Otherwise, you need to keep going.”
Everything else was so hard, I forgot to put some of me in it. I concentrate on the words on making them feel as if part of me is coming out on my breath and onto the plants while I speak. I don’t know if it works or not, but it feels good enough and my fingers are giving out, so I stop crunching but continue chanting.
Nash assists me, moving my hand to a pebble. I press the mixture into the rock, imagining the little part of me I put into my words going into it. I press as hard as I can, my arm shaking, even with his support.
Nothing happens.
Androlla is laughing at my efforts.
“This is pointless.”
Nash puts everything down and cleans my hand with a damp cloth. “The Ryn I know is a fighter, not a whiner.”
I clench my teeth. He’s right. I have to work harder.
“It will not come without practice,” Venda says.
My exhale is louder than I mean it to be.
“Do you want to try again?” Nash asks.
If I must. “Yes.”
We attempt it three more times. By the end, I can barely move my hand, and there’s still no glow on the rock. “I think I’m ready to do some reading.”
Nash nods his approval. “I made something for you. One of us might still have to turn the pages for you, but it should allow you to read for yourself.”
Which will not only be quicker but nice to not have to rely on others as much. I’ll have to work on turning pages myself, though there’s no telling if I’ll ever be able to do it.
He goes out of the room and comes back carrying an odd contraption. It’s a stand, but it has a length of wood sticking out at a ninety-degree angle that stretches across, parallel to the floor. He sets it next to me and swings a part of it like a stand over my lap. Inkga hands him a book, which he opens and places on the stand.
“Do you like it?” There’s a note of hope in his voice.
“Like it? I love it. Where did you get the idea for such a contraption?”
“They have something similar in some libraries, but without the bend for sitting. I got a hold of one and adjusted it for you.”
“You’re more accomplished than I could hope for.” I long to give him a hug and kiss, to let him know how much this means to me. Both it and the chair with wheels have far exceeded my expectations.
Inkga clears her throat, and I realize I’ve been staring at Nash a little too longingly. She says, “I’ll try with the magic while you read. If you don’t mind my chanting while you do so, that is.”
“I don’t mind at all.” I focus my attention on the book in front of me even if the words are blurry for the moment. Anything to get my attention off Nash.
Venda helps guide us as we try magic or find something in a magic book, and Nash and Inkga flip pages for me.
After three hours, it's almost time to meet. “What have you found?” I ask after a particularly trying round of attempting to enchant the pebble.
“I found a spell for giving someone warts.” Nash sounds frustrated, but I can’t help but laugh, along with Inkga and Venda.
“It’s funny,” I say. “I came across everything from destroying an object to beautifying.” Both seemed surprisingly easy. Destroying an object only required the object and beautifying only required the petal of a daisy over what you wanted to enchant.
“I found one that helps you amplify your cleaning tools, such as a broom,” Inkga says. “That’d be useful.”
“All those spells are simple enough, if you believe,” Venda says.
Is that really all it takes? Believing in the magic? There are spells with ingredients difficult to find or chants that look hard to pronounce, like uni’plifnuo, but otherwise they seem straight forward.
I look over more books while the others eat lunch. My excitement has overshadowed my hunger.
When Inkga goes to tell a servant we’re finished with lunch, I say to Venda, “We have a necklace we know is magic. Could you tell us what it does?”
Nash stands, pulls out the necklace we confiscated from Daros, and hands it to Venda.
“I can try.” She threads the necklace through her fingers, closing her eyes.
Several moments pass in silence. Is she going to find something, or will Daros’s magic stay hidden? It would be nice to know he can enchant items for his own use. It would confirm he knows what he’s speaking of.
“Indeed, it has magic. It is a charm of stealth.” She hands the necklace back to Nash. “Quite a strong one. You may wish to use it, Nash.”
That makes perfect sense. I should have guessed something along those lines. It’s a wonder we were able to catch Daros. “Thank you,” I say.
“I must go. I will be back to teach you more later,” Venda says.
“I look forward to it.” And to her company.
After she leaves, it’s time to meet with the Kurah. I hope I can express what I need to.
Chapter 7
The throne room is full as Inkga wheels in my chair. The people are restless—noisy and writhing. There are three unbreakable lines of guards, and more surround me, including Jaku. They must be almost all the guards we have for the palace.
I wanted to bring Puneah but didn’t dare expose her to such a large, and probably hostile, crowd.
The room isn’t as full as I expected. There are lots of people, but about half as many as at the last meeting I had in here. Not all the Kurah are here, but I’m glad those who came did, even if they’re loud.
I’m rolled into place where the thrown used to sit. Someone smart must have removed it—probably one of my ladies-in-waiting. I wait for the people to settle, but the noise continues building. It would be good if there was a way to amplify my voice.
Yelling as loud as I can, I say, “My people, I brought you here toda
y to discuss your needs.”
No one pays me any attention. A guard I don’t recognize says, “Maybe we should have you drink the Mortum Tura. That way, they can see you are meant to be the queen. That might quiet them.”
“No,” Jaku and I say at the same time.
The guard raises his eyebrows but doesn’t press the issue.
What can I do to get their attention? If I had my full capabilities, I would throw my dagger over their heads.
“Silence,” Nash calls out from somewhere behind me. The crowd simmers, though there’s still some noise. “The queen wishes to speak with you.”
The crowd simmers, though there’s still some noise.
I have the urge to run away. Good thing I’m stuck in this chair, or I might do it. I don’t know how I’ll convince them to release their goods to the Medi and Poruah. Because this is something that has to happen. “I know you have issues with your taxes being higher, and that is what we’re here to talk about.”
I take a deep breath. “I know your grievances, and I understand that taxes are a burden you haven't had to shoulder until I came to be queen.”
“That’s right,” yells a man in the front row. “What are you going to do to fix this?”
“We are working on plans to ease your tax burdens.” I put as much sternness into my words as I can. “But we will not—I repeat, not—give in to threats. If you want your taxes eased, you must return to selling your wares and helping those who aren’t as fortunate as you.”
“Why should we?” a woman several rows back yells.
“Because it’s the right thing to do.”
“Right for who?” Another woman from the crowd calls out. “You? The Medi and Poruah? Not for us. We demand you lower our taxes, and lower them now.”
How do I handle this? How do I help them see? Or is harshness the only thing they’d understand?
If Daros was the ruler, he’d beat them or kill them into submission. I don’t want to go that route, but I do want them to grasp how serious I am. “I promise you again that we are working hard on making sure your taxes are lowered. There will be arduous times ahead, but if we work together, we can make the best of a tough situation. If you continue to threaten and demand, I will no longer fight for you.”
“Why should we listen to you?” a male calls out.
“Because I am your queen.”
Silence rains down for the first time since I arrived. The Mortum Tura might have worked better and faster, but they are calming down. “You will open trade, or you will face the consequences,” I say.
I’m about to tell Jaku I’m ready to go, when I feel a little funny. It’s always hard to move, but this is almost like I can’t move at all. Like I have no control.
Like the First Queen has taken over.
No.
I fight against her, to prevent my lips from opening, but they do so anyway. “One more thing. I declare that my Head Advisor, Nash Zorris, and my Head of Guard, Jaku Hanka, are both to be stripped of their jobs and imprisoned. Nurf Pluno will be my new Head Advisor.”
I strain against her control. I can’t let her do this.
“Furthermore, I order the death of Daros Durkin.”
I’m finally able to clamp my lips shut. I try to open them again, to take back what she said, but they won’t budge.
Guards head for Jaku and Nash. I look on, agonizing over their imminent capture, as they both stare at me with shocked expressions.
Chapter 8
Daros may as well have poisoned my heart. For all the good I try to do, it never works. Stupid Androlla and her control over me. She gloated to me all night long while I slept, even as I ran from her. Now as I wake, I want nothing more than to stab her in the throat.
“Inkga?” My voice is harsher than I meant, but I can’t help it.
She stirs. “Sorry. I fell asleep.” She won’t look at me. “How can I help you?”
“Please see to it that Nash and Jaku are let out of prison, and the bounty on Daros’s head is taken off. Write the order, and I’ll sign it.”
She looks at me, her eyebrows crinkling together. “Yes, Your Highness.”
“Ryn. It’s Ryn.” Tears come to my eyes, and I blink them away for a brief moment before they return full force. Inkga looks at me as if I’m a barbarian from another country. I can’t help the words pouring from me. “I’m just Ryn.”
“It’s all right,” she says, her voice soothing. “I don’t know what’s going on, but I understand things must be stressful for you. I’ll get everyone you need. Be back in a moment.” She exits.
Crying was a dumb thing to do. Now I can’t wipe the tears off my cheeks. Everyone who comes to visit will know I lost it. As if I ever had it to begin with.
I sniff and try to gain control of my feelings. Puneah comes out from under the bed and jumps up next to me, then bumps my hand until it rests on her head. I flex my fingers, letting the soft feel of her fur soothe me.
When Inkga returns, I’m in control again, if not completely calm.
“I have Afet coming. He should be able to take care of both requests. He’s acting Head of the Guard, with Jaku in jail.” She looks at me. “Would you like me to dry your cheeks?”
If only she didn’t have to. “Please.”
She grabs a handkerchief and dabs at my face. I focus on the silky feel of Puneah’s fur. It makes me want to close my eyes and go back to sleep, only she will be there to haunt my dreams. Then again, I’ll be able to move.
Doesn’t matter. I’ve got things I need to take care of.
“There,” Inkga says. “That’s better.”
“Thank you.”
“Mmhmm.” She twists the handkerchief through her fingers.
“What is it?” I ask.
She looks at the floor. “I’m sorry I grew cold with you this morning.”
“I don’t blame you. Not after the way I acted last night.”
“If you forgive me for saying so, it didn’t seem like you. It was almost like you were channeling Queen Deedra.”
Should I tell her? Does she have a right to know? Do the people have a right to know? I know she won’t reject the thought of magic, but Androlla. She's a threat to anyone who knows. And the people… They’d reject me. I don’t know what they could do about it, without sending the country into natural-disaster chaos, but they already push me away enough without thinking I’m crazy.
Actually, I do know what they would do. They would have me killed, for such crazy talk. A new queen would be elected, and things would go back to the way they were. Better than being ruled by a crazy person, if a bit more unstable.
I probably shouldn’t put that pressure on Inkga, though the thought is tempting. She’s looking at me with an expression like she’s trying to figure me out.
There’s a knock, and Afet enters. “You wished to see me?”
“Yes, I would like Jaku and Nash released, and the death sentence on Daros lifted.” I try to say I want Nash reinstated as Head Advisor, but it won’t come out. The First Queen has my lips locked down tight.
“Of course, Your Majesty.” He bows and leaves the room.
The honorific makes me pause. Did he add it because he’s nervous around me, like Inkga? Are they afraid I’m going to turn into a tyrant, like their last queen? I can’t blame them, since that’s what Androlla is trying to turn me into.
Inkga helps me change into a dress, which is always an ordeal, but I’m glad to be out of my night gown once it’s over.
“Should I get your breakfast?” Inkga asks.
“I’m not hungry.” Farthest thing from it.
“You need to keep up your strength.”
I hold back a growl. She’s right, but that doesn’t mean I like it. “I’ll be back soon.”
She leaves the room, and in her place comes Julina. To guard me or keep me company, I’m not sure. Either way, she’s not looking at me.
“It’s a fine morning,” I say, trying to start a conversation.
“I know. I’m sorry. I’ve got Afet on it, trying to correct the situation.”
“Why did you do it in the first place? That’s all I want to know.”
My chest tightens. What do I tell her?
“Why don’t you have a response?” she asks.
Still at a loss for words, I stare at her like I’m stupid. Maybe I am, to have gotten in this situation without a way to correct it. Maybe stupid is the wrong word for it. Foolish, perhaps? Or too depressed to think straight.
My mind goes back to the portraits of all those queens who came before me. How did they explain the fact they were changing to others? Or didn’t they notice it? Perhaps it came on too slowly for any of them to realize what was happening.
“It’s difficult to explain,” I say. “I wish I had an answer for you, but the most I can say is that I didn’t mean it and I’m sorry.”
“At least you got one thing right—ordering Daros’s execution. I don’t know why you didn’t do that sooner.”
I wince. “Actually, I’m taking that back as well.”
She tosses her hands up in the air. “Don’t expect me to like it.”
“I don’t.” My voice is small. I make it bigger. “Things are tough. We have to deal with them as they are.”
She cocks her head to the side. “Forgive me for speaking out of place, Ryn. We’re all frazzled this morning, wondering who’s next.”
“If I had it my way, no one would be next.”
She furrows her eyebrow.
“I promise you I’m trying my best. You have been an excellent guard and a good friend. I don’t want you going anywhere.”
“Thank you.” She gives a shy smile. “You’ve been a good friend too, even when I sneeze at the wrong time.”
I chuckle. It'd be nice if we could have more of those moments.
Inkga returns with breakfast and helps me eat. To my surprise, Julina doesn’t leave the room. She stays while I eat, which is a little embarrassing, since Inkga is feeding me. The feeling soon passes. I can’t do anything about it anyway.
By the time Afet returns, I’ve finished eating. Nash and Jaku enter the room after him, looking worried.
