Born…yes. When I was born. That was the key. That was what had held me back all this time, what had preserved me from Lucifer’s words. Because I still remembered. I remembered all too well what I had felt at my birth.
I lifted my head to face not Lucifer, but Vergil, my friend.
“Vergil,” I said, touching his shoulder, “don’t let his words confuse you. This isn’t right. I know we’re young, but I know one thing…God is not confusing.”
“Lysander, we have to join Lucifer. We’re running out of time,” he said, disgusted, brushing off my hand and taking a step back. I felt my emotions swell. I was losing him.
“God is simple, Vergil,” I cried out suddenly, unashamed of how I looked. “He loves us, and He’s warm and caring, and if He’s not revealing His presence, it’s for a reason!! Remember His embrace! What it was like. Recall Raphael’s words – to never forget our first memory! Don’t you remember how warm and powerful He was? He’s nothing like Lucifer. Can’t you feel it? Lucifer’s light is cold and heartless. How could anyone like that give off the love and warmth you desire - the love and warmth you remember? He never will, Vergil. You can’t trust him. You can’t. Think of how so many of us were willing to fight for God because of just two experiences. Two voiceless, loving experiences. Every moment, every thing we’ve seen and heard with Lucifer, can’t even begin to compare to those experiences with God. Lucifer has to use words and lies and deceptions because the love of God is not in him. He plays off our fears and makes us choose out of confusion. You can’t side with him!”
“I hear what you’re saying, my friend,” Vergil said, “but I’ve made my decision. Though I want to stay with you, I don’t want to be with the rest of the group. Marcus, Alessa, Cadence, Farah – they put up with me. They care for me out of duty, not this love you speak of.”
“That’s not true! I know we had some growing pains, but they see you as part of the team now! You’re one of us!”
“And for what, Lysander? So we can continue this war blindly? I would rather put an end to this now. I’ve taken down hundreds of angels since this began, and I don’t want to take down any more. Lucifer wants to end the division, not promote it. Can’t you see that? God had us divided the moment we were born. What about that logic? He could have put us all together, but I was separated from you – because I think He knew what I would become. What I would do. So He cast me away. The others sensed that disconnect in me. Only Lucifer saw my potential.”
“Do you hear yourself?! No, Vergil. We love you. We accepted you when you asked to join us. We didn’t require you to take a test. We took you in. You’re our teammate and friend.”
“You’re right, you are, but I have to do the hard thing now and go beyond our friendship. I know you care about me, but by sticking with you, the war will not end. Or worse, nothing will change. And maybe Lucifer and all the angels on his side will end up unconscious forever, but where will we be? Still craving a God we do not see. Still bickering, debating, and arguing amongst ourselves as God watches us from the sidelines. Until someone rises up and starts this all over again. No, we need to end this now.”
“Vergil…”
“I won’t fight you, but my mind is made up. This is where I belong. I knew the moment I was born that I was different. I knew there was no cohesiveness in our group when I was present. I know why now.”
“Yes,” Lucifer said. “You were destined for greater things, Vergil. That is why you are an Archangel. You are superior to them and you can see how matters should be resolved - for the greater good. This is, after all, one of an Archangel’s many abilities. Maybe I was wrong about the group as a whole. Perhaps I just needed you. I’m sure you sensed how much stronger you were than them.”
“I did,” Vergil said boldly, his eyes looking down upon me, “but I wanted to belong so badly.”
“And you do,” Lucifer soothed. “You are part of my family. Now, let’s leave and figure out how to end this war. We still need to convince the other angels of our cause.”
“What about me?!” I screamed as they began walking away, their backs facing me. Lucifer turned around like he had forgotten I was there.
“You won’t listen to reason, so we will leave you be. Don’t pursue us.”
“If you can’t even persuade me, how are you going to persuade Heaven’s host? Is this what you do? After all your talk of unity, you cast away those that need to understand ‘reason’ the most? It’s ‘obey or perish?’ Is that it, Lucifer?!”
“We will use force if we must,” he said, walking away with Vergil again, “but we would prefer if you just stay out of our way. I won’t let you corrupt Vergil any further. You are no longer needed. He alone took down more angels than your group could ever hope to. This war is won now, thanks to him.”
“NO!” I screamed, flying forward to attack. I didn’t know what damage I could cause to two Archangels by myself, but I didn’t care. This was my chance to put an end to things, and if there was ever a time for me to fight with all my strength and succeed, it was now. But I didn’t get the chance. Right as Lucifer and Vergil floated down the other side of the mountain, a Godhand and a Glory with a sword got in my way. The Godhand put a hand on my chest and pushed me back to the center of the platform. I tried to stand solid, hoping that God would hold me up like He did with Farah, but I fell backwards and banged my head. Both of them stood there idly, waiting for me to try again. They were sure I wasn’t going anywhere.
“Get out of my way!” I roared. They continued watching me listlessly and didn’t budge an inch. There was no way I was going to win by using brute force, so I had to try tactics. And it had to be done quickly. Vergil and Lucifer were no longer in sight and I didn’t know how fast they were flying. I already knew from my race with Vergil that they were faster than me. Every second counted. So I created the best plan I could in the short amount of time I had.
“COME ON!” I screamed as I flew forward and hit the Godhand in the face. His lack of a reaction showed that he didn’t feel a thing, and I didn’t expect him to, but I was ready to annoy him into a fury. I punched his cheeks and nose over and over, flicking it, slapping it, doing everything I could to make him angry. He remained stoic, but I noticed his jaw was tensing up. My antics alone weren’t enough to send him over the edge, and it wasn’t until the Glory next to him started laughing that he gave a cry of rage and attempted to swing at me. He missed, for I had been waiting the whole time for him to try it.
Godhands were strong, but on average not very fast. With Marcus, we had to continually set him up to deliver his crushing blows. Alone, he would’ve kept striking out. Just like this guy. The Godhand swung at me over and over, missing me barely each time - which was all part of the plan. If I was too fast, he might realize that there was no point in swinging. I couldn’t let him figure that out – that if he just stood there and kept me from Lucifer, he would accomplish his mission. No, I needed him to keep swinging, thinking that he was close, hoping that the next hit would be the one to connect. It was a dangerous game, for one well-placed punch could easily put me down, and I had to keep my eyes on the Glory as well, making sure he didn’t step in.
After a while, I saw that this Godhand had too much strength and it was taking too long to tire him out, so I switched up my strategy. I let him hit me. Not full on, simply a graze against my skin each time. His fist would slide off my cheek and I would purposely stagger or spiral away in the air, only to come back for more. This made him even angrier, putting more force into each blow, enraged that I was enduring the hits of a Godhand. And somehow, I was.
Eventually, he had enough. His patience long gone, he placed all his angelic pressure into one blow like I had seen Marcus do to the Godhand he had faced earlier. I waited for it to almost connect, and then I dodged it completely, not even risking a graze. The Godhand stumbled forward and I let my wings carry me up for a moment. Wasting no time, I flew downward, my feet planted together and extended like a torpedo. Both feet hi
t him on the right side of his face, and he went flying off the platform. Down the mountain he went, to where the battle raged on.
The Glory realized how serious the situation had suddenly gotten, but before he could react, I unsheathed his sword and slashed a clean diagonal swipe across his body, from shoulder to hip. With a look of shock, the Glory blacked out, and I clutched the sword with fervor.
I sped down the mountain as fast as my wings allowed and I could see Lucifer not too far away, due to his ever-glowing aura. Thankfully, he and Vergil had continued to float, not fly, down the mountain. Even now they were steadily making their way across the field below, talking about what to do next.
Despite my anxiety, I pressed forward. I could see that in the field before me there would be no support. Lucifer’s army was waiting straight ahead. They militaristically parted for Lucifer and Vergil, but otherwise stood vigilant in the field. Their lines extended hundreds of light years away, arranged by classifications, staring straight ahead and waiting for God’s army to make it over the mountain. I didn’t know if they would attack me, seeing as how I was obviously no threat, but I didn’t care. I had to save Vergil.
“VERGIL!!!” I screamed as I swung the sword with all my might, the blade cutting through the first line of angels that stood in my way. Seeing their comrades fall, the army took it upon themselves to apprehend me. They had been patiently waiting for the battle to come to them, but a single defiant angel would have to do for now. I lasted for a good minute, dodging and swinging. I even managed to clash against a couple of angels and push them from me like I was a mighty Archangel, but Lucifer’s army was too vast and powerful. A Guard eventually stood in my way and took a couple of hits from my sword, just enough for him to get closer and closer and eventually grab the hilt. I tried to wrestle it from him, but a Godhand grabbed my puny arms and held them behind me like I was being arrested. A Glory hit me in the abdomen and another Guard was about to slice at my neck with his own blade when a shout came from ahead. Lucifer had taken notice of the commotion and had ordered Vergil to follow him - to where I was imprisoned.
“I’m impressed you made it this far,” Lucifer mused, cupping my chin in his hand. “But we cannot continue to give God’s army hope. Like the rest of your friends, you need to be put down.”
“Even without us, they will have hope,” I said to him courageously. He slapped me across the face.
“Have you stopped to listen to the battle going on atop the other side of the mountain? There is simply yelling and cries of pain. You can’t sense much, not being an Archangel, but your side is losing, and fast. They will make it over the mountain, but their spirits will be crushed when they see what’s waiting for them on this side.”
“Vergil,” I called out, ignoring him. “Stop this!”
“He will,” Lucifer said, waving him forward. “Vergil, I know you have been apprehensive about leaving your friend. I tell you now - this is the last link to be severed. Take your sword and cut through him with all your angelic might. He will be unconscious for over a millennia. Do this, and you will be free of your guilt and your confusion.”
“I don’t want to cut him. He is weak. I don’t need to prove myself with him.”
“Stop making excuses. You know that despite your power, your emotions hold you back. Let go of them, and you will be on the same level as I.”
Vergil glanced at Lucifer with a gaze that begged for his power.
“Then we could end the war?”
“Yes. But I need you by my side. With your emotions in check, you will be able to fight against anyone. Together, we will strike down God. We will have that amount of power, I promise you. But you must strike this Messenger down. I know this is hard, but you already made it over the first hurdle by joining me. Remember, God will not take you back at this point. We are too far into our rebellion. Therefore, we must continue our mission or be destroyed. You must overcome this mountain, Vergil. You must subdue your emotions.”
“Vergil…you are my friend,” I pleaded. “Don’t do this.”
“I am sorry, Lysander,” he said, his voice choking and growing weak, his breathing erratic. “But I must. I am too far gone.”
He lunged into me with his sword and it felt like it was going to break my body in two. My angelic pressure plummeted as he twisted the blade. His face was in mine now, and his eyes were wide with internal pain as he saw me open and close my mouth, trying to talk as I began to go blind. My body went numb and in my last moments, I reached out with my right hand, the hand not struggling to remove Vergil’s sword from my chest, and I grazed his cheek - caressing his face affectionately. I couldn’t speak, but I hoped I got the message across.
I forgave him.
I don’t know why, but I forgave him. He would never cease being my friend. In fact, none of my love for any of my brothers and sisters in Lucifer’s army had gone away.
And as I closed my eyes to rest, the pain suddenly dissipated. It completely went away, and I gained my full angelic pressure back in an instant, like I had just woken up from a nightmare.
And I felt it.
My first memory relived. That warm soothing presence that calmed my fears, placed a comforting hand on my back. My pain subsided instantly and suddenly there was nothing but blinding light all around me, washing me and going through my spirit like it was blood coursing through my veins.
It didn’t last long.
And I had barely turned to look at the light, when it was over just as suddenly as it had begun.
My surroundings came into focus. I was alone in the field. The sword had disappeared from my chest. Lucifer’s words were no longer whispering in my ears. His army had vanished. And Vergil…was nowhere to be found.
At first I thought that I had woken up a millennia into the future, but that couldn’t have been true, for in the next instant, millions of angels flew over the mountain and cheered. They flew through the air in circles. They hugged one another and threw down their weapons to the grassy plain below them. I stood there dazed as one floated down to me and lifted me up, giving me a great big hug.
“What happened?” I asked him, and a whistle sounded off near us, directing our attention to an angel I instinctively knew was Gabriel. He was smiling and practically shaking with joy.
“Everyone, there is no need to worry! In our darkest hour, victory was laid in our hands, and Lucifer’s army has been defeated! I can say little else but this: God – has ended the war!!”
The cries of worship and praise were deafening as the angels flew around each other, the colors of their armor and hair blending together like confetti as they hovered in the skies. I stood in the midst, dazed and unsure, looking at my hands as Farah came out of nowhere and put me in a friendly half-headlock. Revived by God Himself, she laughed and hugged my neck tightly, patting my back and talking excitedly. Alessa flew down from the mountain and soon joined her, jumping up and down and greeting others as they flew past. Marcus, not far behind her, was bouncing off the ground like a rabbit, failing at trying to imitate Alessa. He stretched his arms out wide as he leaped, hitting passing angels by mistake and causing minor vibrations in the ground itself.
Saving us all, Cadence soon appeared in front of him and calmed him down. After some coaxing, Marcus eventually settled for clapping and, with the threat neutralized, everyone started giggling uncontrollably at how funny Marcus had looked. The sight of my family rejoicing in the field made me smile, and it reminded me that I had a reason to be happy too. I had never seen them so excited, and they deserved to celebrate. I wouldn’t burden them with my troubles. Not now. The war was over, and the enemy had been removed. Why would anyone be in a sour mood? ...Why was I?
I wanted to ask Cadence for his advice, but he and the others had already taken to the air, bidding for me to join them. I waved them on. At first, they stared down at me, unsure of my sullen demeanor. I waved them on again, insinuating that I was okay, and they flew off, seeking to participate in the heavenly song tha
t the angels had begun to sing. They moved with such harmony and grace that my spirit pulled at me, begging for me to put my feelings aside and jump in the chorus.
Only…I stood still.
I wanted to join in the praise, relish in the joy and victory. Worship God for saving us all and bringing every single angel that had fallen back to full health. But I couldn’t move, and I lost myself in my thoughts. By the time I came to, I found myself floating in the air by the Throne Room.
Supposedly, something had transported all of us there, and it could only have been our Father. Upon our collective arrival, the whole host of Heaven was talking so loudly and energetically, I knew my assumption had been correct. God had brought us home, to the Throne Room, to celebrate together, as a family.
And that is why, upon gazing at the Throne Room, I was not surprised to find the massive doors opening. They creaked slowly, moving all on their own, a brilliant light shining from beyond like a magnificent star. I could feel the love baking me from where I hovered, and all of Heaven immediately flew down to the newly repaired city floor, restored to its former glory. They bowed as the doors spread wide open and waited for the beckoning of our Lord. I copied their actions. Though my heart was elsewhere, it didn’t mean God deserved my disrespect…
You could not see through the light to perceive what was inside the Throne Room, but you could feel it. God was there, and He was not demanding for us to show Him love and respect, He was offering us His unconditional love - it was up to us if we wanted to feel His presence once again. The same presence we had fought for…that so many had argued for, bickered for, vanished for…
Our first memory, which we were told to never forget, could now be reinforced and solidified. Our minds now able to make new memories to supersede the old. A refreshing. A revival.
And there was a mass flooding into the chamber doors as God’s divine presence welcomed us in. In the blink of an eye, every single angel remaining in Heaven was inside.
The Works of Julius St. Clair - 2017 Edition (Includes 3 full novels and more) Page 78
