“There’s really only two things you have to do at any time. Fix meals for the passengers, and have the teams ready when the stage comes in. There’s a schedule on the wall over there so you’ll know when they’re supposed to get here.”
“I’ve seen it,” she replied a little more tartly then she intended, and Lucas’s eyes opened wider. “It doesn’t seem like a very difficult job to me.”
That part is easy. It’s the rest that’ll cause you trouble.”
“And what’s that?”
“Staying here.”
“Staying here?” Carrie repeated, completely bewildered. “What do you mean by that?.”
There’s all kinds of people who might not want you here, To start with, there’s Baca Riggins. He’s been put out and that’s something his pride won’t stand.”
“I think I can handle Mr. Riggins.”
Then there’s Indians.”
“Indians?”
They’ll run off your horses. If they’re hungry, they’ll eat them. Indians love horse meat.”
“Is there anyone else I have to worry about?” Carrie asked with a shudder. She couldn’t believe that even an Indian would eat a horse.
“Sure. There’s outlaws, renegades, and gunslingers, not to mention drunks, malcontents, and a few men who just don’t like to see women anywhere but in the kitchen.”
“I’ve seen several of those already. And if I’m not mistaken, you’re one of them as well.”
“You’ve seen the ones who don’t care for it but will accept it. I’m talking about the ones who will take it upon themselves to do something about it.”
“Are there many?”
“You never can tell. With that kind you almost never know until it’s too late.”
“I think you’re trying to frighten me, Mr. Barrow, and I don’t appreciate that.”
“No, ma’am, I’m not trying to scare you. I’m trying to tell you it’s mighty dangerous for a lone female in this country. Fort Malone doesn’t have soldiers anymore. There’s only a sheriff who’s not paid well enough to give any attention to things that happen this far away. You’re on your own here, ma’am.”
“Nevertheless, I have every intention of remaining at this station and doing the best job I possibly can. And stop calling me ma’am,” Carrie added with a trace of impatience in her voice. “My name is Carrie Simpson.”
“All right, Mrs. Simpson, I was just trying to explain why your husband should never have let you come out here alone. I’m sure he didn’t know anything about Baca Riggins, but if it hadn’t been Baca, it would have been somebody else. My advice to you is to get on the overnight which comes through in a couple of hours and not stop until you get back to Denver. No woman has any business out here alone. She’s not equipped for it.”
“Thank you for your advice, Mr. Barrow,” Carrie said freezingly as she rose to her feet, “but I have every intention of remaining here and of proving to you and everyone else in the Overland Stage Company that I can manage this station just as effectively, no, more effectively than any man. If you will agree to help with the horses, I will provide your meals. If not, I’ll have to charge you each time you eat with us.”
Lucas rose to his feet, undecided as to whether he wanted to curse her stubborn refusal to listen to his warning or admire her spunk. It led to a dead end for him either way, and he’d best get back to his horses. Suddenly he felt safer chasing a dozen men who fought with guns than one small woman armed with nothing but her adorable self. He had lost every encounter so far, and he couldn’t see his average improving in the future.
“That seems fair enough, ma’am, and I’ll be happy to lend a hand if I’m around.”
“Thank you, but don’t change your plans to suit me. I’m sure we can manage.” The twinkle in Lucas’s eyes was unmistakable, and Carrie had the distinct, irritating impression he was laughing at her.
“Sleep well, ma’am, and don’t forget to lock up tight. There are bears in these hills that would do a lot for some of that ham you just served me.”
“I’ll be staying at the cabin, at least for the time being, until I can get this place cleaned out.”
“You can’t clean anything Baca used. Burn it.”
“That’s what Katie told me.”
“Then you listen to her. She’s a sensible girl.”
“And I’m not?” Carrie asked, her inflection rising with her eyebrows.
“I didn’t say that, ma’am. I would never be so rude.” Carrie wished she could bite her tongue. Now how was she going to get out of this gracefully.
“Excuse me. I guess I’m a little sensitive. Everyone I’ve met today has made a point of telling me I had no business being here by myself, and you keep ma’aming me until I feel positively decrepit.”
“Sorry, ma—Mrs. Simpson. I didn’t mean any disrespect.”
“Is there anything wrong with calling me Carrie?”
“You’re a married woman.”
“I’m still a woman. Women have names, just like men, and they like to be called by them. My name is Carrie. Say it.”
“Yes, ma’am, Carrie, ma’am.” He was smiling broadly now, and it made her want to forget her irritation.
“Go on, get out of here before I run you off like Baca Riggins.”
“Now ma’am, you’ll hurt my feelings comparing me to Baca. I might get the impression you don’t like me.”
“You have no such impression, and you know it. Now stop trying to bait me. Katie and I have to clean up before we can go to bed, and tomorrow comes early.”
“Thanks again for the food. It was mighty good. Good night … Carrie.” Carrie spun around, but the door had already closed behind him.
“I can’t think how can you sit and talk with him like that,” Katie said. “He makes me uneasy all over. Those eyes seem to look right through you.”
“There’s nothing about him to worry you.”
“Seems like he never spoke to me before, just stared at me like I wasn’t there. He seems different around you.”
“He’s like all the rest of the men out here, cocksure and positive there’s nothing a woman can do they can’t do better.”
“You’re not afraid to stay here?”
“Why should I be? You weren’t, and you’ve been here a week already.”
“But I don’t look like you, ma’am, and there be no need for ye say nice things to spare me feelings. I know what I am. I’m big and healthy, and I’ll make some man a good wife, but I’m not the kind of woman men dream about nor pine over. Most of them would look right past me if they happened to see a good horse.”
“You’re being too rough on yourself. You’re a charming person and a wonderful cook, and there’re probably dozens of men who would be delighted to marry you if you weren’t already engaged.”
“If I be,” muttered Katie. Td sure like to know where Brian’s got to.”
“I’m sure it’s something very unimportant, and he hasn’t written because he expected to be able to get here any minute.”
“Well, I hope nothing happens to keep your husband away. The sooner he gets here, the safer I’ll feel.”
“Let’s finish cleaning up here and go lock ourselves in for the night. Then we’ll be safe from bears and Mr. Barrow’s outlaws.”
“If you be so hard set on him calling you by your first name, you’re going to have to start calling him Lucas.” Carrie looked startled. “’Tis no more than fair,” Katie added.
“I suppose it is,” Carrie agreed, “but if he’s going to be off chasing wild horses all the time, I won’t be able to call him anything so it won’t matter.”
“There’s nothing about that man that doesn’t matter,” Katie stated with conviction. “And it won’t make any difference if he’s right next to you or a hundred miles away.”
Carrie was inclined to agree, but she hoped Lucas wouldn’t go so far away as that.
Chapter 4
Carrie closed her bedroom door and allowed
her body to sag against its roughly carved panels. She had gotten through the day, just barely, but she wouldn’t have made it without Katie O’Malley and Lucas Barrow. What ever made her think she could handle this job on her own? Why hadn’t she turned around at St. Louis when she found Robert had died of a fever and gone back home while she still had the money? If she had known what she was up against, she might have, no matter how bleak her future in Smithfield, Virginia, promised to be.
Like Katie, she had cooked and cleaned for her father and brothers after her mother died. As soon as the war was over, her older brother had brought home a lovable wife, a beautiful, charming, useless creature who gave him three children in less than four years and then died of childbed fever. Naturally Carrie had stepped in to take care of the children, and naturally she had not complained when David had been too grief-stricken to pay much attention to his young family. Apparently Emilie’s family was also weighed down by grief because they, too, made no offer to help care for the children.
Carrie said nothing to anyone, though she said a great deal to her pillow every night before she fell into an exhausted sleep. She waited for the wounds caused by Emilie’s death to heal. But when everybody had recovered sufficiently to be able to face the problem, Carrie had been handling it successfully for so long no one saw any need to change anything. Carrie could have stood up to her brother, but her father practically made her caring for his grandchildren a test of family loyalty. On top of that, David’s in-laws sang the praises of Carrie’s unselfishness so loud and long it would have been a social disgrace to refuse. Carrie resigned herself to being a mother without ever having had a husband and children of her own.
She might still have been in Virginia had not her other brother, Sam, brought home a wife, Luanda, who showed every inclination to yield to Carrie in everything, especially if it involved work. Carrie knew in due time she would find herself mothering another set of children, and she made up her mind to leave home.
The entire household had been stunned when she announced she was going to marry Robert Simpson and move to Colorado, but ironically it was not her family that made the loudest outcry, at least not at first. Lucinda had broken into hysterical sobs, loudly complaining of Carrie’s unparalleled selfishness in leaving her family when they needed her. Next it was David’s in-laws’ turn to carry the tale of Carrie’s disaffection throughout the town, making it seem that their grandchildren were being heartlessly abandoned. Finally, Lucinda announced she was expecting a child, and her parents expressed their astonishment that Carrie would consider leaving her sister-in-law at such a time.
At this point, her father and brothers took up the by now very well rehearsed cry, and the result was a terrible argument during which they all said things they didn’t mean and would have repented of a few days later, but Carrie decided not to give anybody a chance to apologize. She packed her clothes, gave away everything she didn’t intend to take to Colorado, and left the house without waiting to receive anyone’s blessing. It had hurt, but Carrie longed for a life and home of her own, and she knew she would never get it in Smithfield.
Hers was an extremely handsome family. Her father had been one of the most admired young men in the state, and her brothers were no less handsome. They were charming, gay, and the best of company. Carrie’s mother had always pandered to her father and brothers, and they took it as the natural course of events that Carrie should continue to do the same, and they could never understand why she rebelled. Though not as handsome as her brothers, Carrie knew she was pretty, and had it not been a well-known fact that her father and brothers had neglected their lands, she would have been much sought after. In a state where the economy had been ruined by the Civil War and where the number of young men had been drastically reduced by that bloody conflict, a girl virtually had to bring something to her marriage or resign herself to being an aunt. Carrie’s dilemma had been even more acute. In the small town of Smithfield, the only unmarried man to come back home after the war beside her own brothers was Robert Simpson.
Carrie knew Robert Simpson’s marriage proposal would be the only escape she would be offered, and even though she felt only a mild liking for him, she agreed to marry him. She had known him all her life and knew he would never take advantage of her as her own family had done. She accepted his offer with the single stipulation that he find a job as far away from Smithfield as possible. She had not expected him to look as far afield as Colorado, but she had not drawn back when he wrote telling her of the position at the Green Run Pass Station and sending money for her journey.
She had traveled to St. Louis with hope in her heart and confidence that she and Robert could build a reasonably happy marriage. Their union would lack the passion she had hoped to find and the ardent adoration her mother had held for her father, but she would be comfortable, and that had to count for something.
Nothing could describe her shock when she reached St. Louis to be told Robert had died only a few days earlier of a virulent fever then plaguing towns along the Mississippi. She was a little conscience-stricken to find she didn’t feel any real sense of loss—die officials all seemed as much struck by her coolness as her beauty—but she never had deceived herself into thinking Robert had been able to engage her heart, and this was no time to punish herself for being unable to shed false tears. She had been given all of Robert’s possessions, and it was in going through his papers that she found the letter giving him the position as manager of the station. She decided at once to take it herself. Her only alternative was to go back to Virginia, and she couldn’t do that. To return while the feelings of resentment and hostility over her departure were still strong would have guaranteed that she would never be allowed a free moment for the rest of her life. Everyone would consider themselves obliged to impose upon her, and she decided death was almost preferable to that.
The decision to take on the stagecoach station had been made on the spur of the moment, and she hadn’t worked out how she was going to explain the absence of her husband until she was halfway there. Then it had seemed like a simple matter to keep postponing his arrival until no one really expected him. By then she would have established herself so firmly there would be no question of replacing her.
She had never allowed herself to question her reasoning until some passengers who boarded the stage in Denver began to talk about Baca Riggins. She had given little credence to their stories at first, certain they were trying to scare her, sure it was part of the initiation process all Easterners had to go through when they went west, but after a while it was impossible to ignore the fact that there was universal agreement as to the character of Baca Riggins, and by the time she arrived at Green Run Pass Station, she was in such a state it was all she could do not to get right back on the stage and return to Denver. Now she had survived her first day, but only with the considerable help of Katie and Lucas, both of whom would soon be leaving. Carrie was realistic enough to realize, and admit, that she couldn’t run the station alone, but she had no idea what she was going to do. Katie might leave at any minute, and while Lucas would probably be around awhile longer, he might decide to go after wild horses any minute. Then what would she do?
She had to come up with a plan, she couldn’t just keep hoping things would work out in her favor, but she would have to put that off until tomorrow. She intended to try once more to talk Lucas into staying, at least to get him to promise to take care of the horses for a definite length of time, but she was sure she could count on Katie to do the cooking until her Brian came. Actually she could handle the cooking by herself as long as there was someone for the horses, but she couldn’t do both. That was simply too much for one person, but she had no idea where to look for a cook or a horse tender. Oh well, that was another thing she could ask Lucas about tomorrow.
She realized she was depending an awful lot on a man who had refused to commit himself to helping her, but somehow Lucas was the kind of person one did depend on. Besides, he had rescued her from Baca Rig
gins, and he had harnessed the team without being asked. Sure, he had told her he couldn’t continue to work for her, but he always seemed to be around when he was needed.
Her curiosity about him was greater than ever, but she realized she had to be very careful if she started asking questions about him. Everyone believed she was married, and they would interpret her interest in a very different manner because of it. Suddenly she was angry that she was caught in such an untenable position, and all through no fault of her own. No, she couldn’t say that. She had been only too anxious to marry Robert, and it was her own idea to manage the station the station by herself. No, she was in a tough situation because she didn’t want to accept the only solution she could think of and go home; she had to have a life of her own, and she was determined to fight for it if she had to. She doubted she would have had the courage to come ahead if she had known what faced her, but she was here now and she intended to stay. Bother Lucas’s outlaws, renegades, and drunks. She’d make sure the doors were locked at night and that someone was around during the day, but she was going to stick it out. Thousands of other women had endured a lot worse than this to cross the plains in a covered wagon, and she was just as tough and tenacious as any of them.
From long habit, Carrie woke before dawn. She immediately got up, but when she remembered the first stage didn’t come through until after nine o’clock and realized she didn’t have to get up for another hour at least, she sank back down with a blissful sigh and snuggled under the covers. It was already late spring, but unlike her native Virginia, May nights could be very cold in Colorado, and the warmth of her bed was deliriously inviting. For a moment she enjoyed a feeling of peace and well-being. Just knowing she was in her own home and didn’t have to prepare breakfast for seven people, not to mention get them out of bed and see that the children got dressed, added to her contentment, but gradually she started to recall all the difficulties of her situation at the station, and her feeling of contentment faded. If she didn’t solve her problems, she would ultimately be faced with the necessity of going back home or marrying the first man who asked her.
Colorado Bride Page 5
