Making It

by Christine d'Abo

“Oh my God, Devan. Have you been on Facebook today?” Meg was through the door before Devan had finished opening it.

  As per his normal Saturday morning routine, Devan had yet to get dressed and had been playing on the floor with Matthew. His sleep pants were frayed around the cuffs and the elastic band around his waist didn’t hold anywhere as well as it had used to. It wasn’t exactly the sort of thing he’d normally wear in front of anyone. Thankfully, Meg wasn’t anyone.

  “And good morning to you too.” He made a beeline to the kitchen to get her a coffee, knowing she’d want one without her asking. “No, Mattie and I were playing and cuddling.”

  When he came back out into the living room, Meg had picked Matthew up and was plying his face with kisses. “Do it. I’ve got him.”

  He put her coffee down on the table and went in search for his phone. “If this is some weird political thing, I’m really not interested.”

  “This falls under sports. I figured you’d be more than interested.”

  Devan’s heartbeat kicked up a notch. “Eli?” Shit, where the hell was his phone?

  “I sent you a Messenger link. I wanted to be the one to let you know.”

  If Meg was here, that meant it couldn’t be anything good and she was worried he’d freak out. He finally found his phone in the bathroom under one of Matthew’s nightshirts. Meg’s link was there, and it took only a second for it to load.

  There was Eli, standing in a boxing ring staring down at some man Devan didn’t recognize. The guy was clearly trying to bait Eli, but Devan could tell from the look on his face that he wasn’t going to bite. Eli’s skin glistened in the light, despite the somewhat grainy quality of the video. With his arms crossed, the muscles in his biceps flexed, as did his pecs.

  Damn it, he really was a beautiful man to look at.

  Devan hadn’t really been paying attention to what the other guy had been saying, but when he jumped into the ring and ripped off his shirt, Devan knew what was going to happen. Eli ducked and weaved his way out of reach, but clearly wasn’t expecting the kick. Devan gasped as Eli hit hard on the canvas.

  God, why did he do that to himself? Put himself into positions where his body would be punished. The guy had clearly landed a cheap shot, but Eli surprisingly kept his temper in check. He’d always been good at that.

  With his phone in hand, he wandered back out to the living room. Meg had put Matthew into his playpen and was now drinking her coffee. “I have to say, Eli is still looking good.”

  “Yeah.” He pulled out the chair and sat beside her. “I’m actually worried about him.”

  “Why? Did he say something when you saw him? Trying to earn your sympathy, no doubt.”

  He loved Meg like a sister, but when she made her mind up about someone, it was hard to change her way of thinking.

  “He didn’t seem himself.”

  “How the hell would you know what that is anymore? It’s not like he’s been around.” There was something off in her voice. Meg wasn’t a harsh person, but there was an edge that wasn’t normally there.

  “Hon, what’s wrong? And don’t tell me it’s about that video.”

  Meg blinked as unexpected tears rolled down her cheeks. “Josh and I had a fight. It’s fine.”

  Clearly it wasn’t. Devan pulled her in for a hug. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

  She chuckled and wiped her tears as she moved away. “You can let me meddle in your life. It’s better than mine at the moment.”

  “God, I couldn’t stop you even if I wanted to.” Meg and Josh had been happily married for nearly four years now. The timing of their fight brought back unhappy memories of his own. “Eli interrupted a date I had the other night.”

  “He what?”

  “It was fine. Honestly, I was praying for someone to notice there was a problem, but that someone turned out to be Eli. I was trying to get away from my date, the guy turned out to be a major creep, grabbed my arm hard, and wouldn’t let me leave.”

  “Well, I guess it’s good that he was there for you.”

  “It was. But at the time I was so pissed at him, I walked away after we had a little fight. I haven’t talked to him in days.”

  He hadn’t known how to feel about the entire night. Eli had invaded his privacy, butted into a situation that he had no business being involved in. And yet Devan had been wishing someone would notice that he’d been trying to get away from his date. When the man had grabbed his wrist and squeezed, Devan had been genuinely scared for his safety.

  When he’d looked up and seen Eli standing by the table, glaring down at his date, instead of anger, Devan had only felt relief. Eli had cared enough—albeit in his twisted-logic way—to make sure he was okay. It didn’t excuse the stalking, but it certainly let him know that maybe there was hope. For what exactly, he wasn’t sure.

  “He apologized and said that if I wanted to date other men, then he would happily babysit Matthew for me. He was willing to give up the chance to go on a date with me if that would help.” It had been a sweet offer, one that had brightened his mood.

  Even if it went against Rule 1.

  Rather than freak out the way he’d expected, Meg looked more than a little impressed. “That’s interesting. I didn’t think he’d want anything to do with Matthew.”

  “Me either. But I’m not sure it would be a good idea. I don’t want Matthew getting attached and then being upset if he has to leave.”

  “Honey, Matthew wouldn’t remember one way or the other. This is about you and Eli, nothing more.” Meg looked over to where Matthew was playing with Mr. Fuzzy. “You have a good life with Mattie, but I know you’re lonely. Eli screwed things up with you, and I’m the last person to push you in a direction you don’t want to go. But maybe you should take him up on his offer to babysit. You get to go on some dates, and he’ll get a small taste of what your life is like. Not to mention that he might appreciate a place to hide out from the spotlight for a while.”

  “You’re deviously logical. You know that, right?”

  “I am.” And for the first time since her arrival, Meg smiled. “It’s my superpower.”

  She did have a point. Eli was usually all-in when it came to his training, but Devan remembered how much he needed his downtime as well. Not that Devan needed a babysitter—he had a perfectly good one already—but the chance to see Eli while still gaining a bit of freedom of his own, that was an opportunity too good to pass up. “I’ll text him and see when he’s free to come over.”

  Meg took a big sip of her coffee. “You’ll also need to find a date. Someone who will make Eli jealous.”

  “I’m not going to throw that in his face. He’s doing me a favor, and I’m trying to see if there’s someone out there for me.” Someone other than Eli.

  “Is there someone who you’ve seen recently who you’d like to go out with again?”

  Matthew gurgled and threw Mr. Fuzzy against the side of his playpen. Devan watched his beautiful boy playing and wondered what was the right decision. He’d spent some time on a couple of online dating sites the other night. While there were a number of good-looking men out there whose profile matched Devan’s image of a perfect man, there’d always been something that had held him back. It wasn’t their looks, or their bios, but rather he didn’t feel that tug, the spark that had flared up the moment he’d laid eyes on Eli.

  He’d never know if he didn’t put himself out there and try. “I talked to a guy online a few times. His name is Pierce. We have a bunch of things in common. He might be a good option.”

  “Perfect! Ask him out for dinner. See if there’s something there. Your relationship with Eli didn’t happen overnight, a new relationship won’t either.”

  Meg’s phone chose that moment to buzz. She looked down at it for half a second before tossing it on the table. Devan didn’t need to ask to know who the message was from. “Josh groveling yet?”

  “Not yet. Just wondering where I’m at. Which means he’s not angry any long
er, but he’s not sure what my current mood is.”

  “As if you’d be anywhere but here.” No doubt, Devan’s phone would start ringing soon enough if Meg kept giving Josh the cold shoulder. “What was the fight about?”

  Meg’s gaze drifted over to Matthew. “You know when I said I wasn’t interested in having any kids of my own?”

  Oh. “That’s starting to change?” Despite Meg being his surrogate, he’d never thought she’d ever change her mind about starting her own family.

  “Maybe. I don’t know. Josh really doesn’t want any, and he’s always been up front about that. I didn’t think I wanted any either.”

  Devan took her hand. “But?”

  “But the other week when we watched Mattie for you when you were at the dentist, I don’t know, something sort of clicked with me. I stayed up with him, and played on the floor with him. I know it’s not all sunshine and roses having a baby. I know how hard it is on you being a single dad. But . . .” She gently shook her head. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. About having my own child to hold and sing to sleep. About them getting older and going trick-or-treating.”

  He’d been there, back when he and Eli were still together. Having a child had been the one thing that had driven him. “Speaking from experience, you need to talk this out with Josh. Seriously consider all of your options. It’s stress on a relationship, even a solid one. But if you’re not both on the same page . . .” He sighed. “If this is something you want, truly want, and he isn’t willing to go there—”

  “Then I might have to reconsider my relationship.” Meg dropped her head to her hands. “I knew you were going to say that.”

  God, he didn’t like to see her going through this, not after all she’d done for him. “I wish I could help. But this is something the two of you really need to work out. That said, I’m here for you, forever and always. No matter what.”

  He hugged her again. Why did life have to be so complicated about these things? All he’d ever wanted was a small family to love. That was it. He’d never had one of his own growing up. While he loved his foster parents, loved that they’d taken him into their home and treated him as one of their own, he couldn’t help but feel like an outsider. When he’d met Eli, that had been something that they’d had in common. He’d always assumed it would be a strong enough foundation to cement their relationship.

  He’d never been so wrong.

  Meg sighed and got up from her chair. “I should probably go so you can make some phone calls. You need to get that date set up and the big man here is going to need a fresh diaper from the smell of him.”

  Damn, she was right. “What are you going to do?”

  “A little retail therapy, maybe some Starbucks. Then I’ll be ready to talk to Josh.” She grabbed her coat. “You’re right that I should probably give myself some time to think things through as well.”

  “It isn’t a decision you can change your mind on.” Matthew pulled himself up with the help of the playpen side and started yammering. “Because the little man keeps you busy. But Meg, I don’t regret the decision, not even a little. Despite it making the days long and it costing me my marriage, I would make the same choice all over again.”

  He gave Meg a kiss on the cheek and saw her to the door. Once she’d left, he changed Matthew, grabbed his phone, and sat down to figure out who would be his next attempt at a date.

  Eli had finished his shower after his latest workout at Ringside, when Grady came into the locker room. “There’s the man I was looking for.”

  He hadn’t spent much time with Grady, mostly because the other man was out looking for investors for the gym, or spending time flirting with Max. Another disgustingly cute couple. “What can I do for you, pretty boy?”

  “You can totally do some social media promos using Ringside as your background.” Grady leaned against the locker beside where Eli was changing. “That little video of Caulfield’s has had Nolan swamped with membership applications and calls from the media about when you started training here.”

  Eli shouldn’t have been surprised by that particular revelation, given how busy the gym had been today, but he was. He wasn’t a main card fighter, not yet at least, so he’d never assumed he’d be that much of a draw. “And you want me to do more?”

  “Look, I’m not your manager and I don’t know what media constraints you’re under. All I’m focused on is building Ringside up as much as possible.” Grady ran his hand though his hair and shot Eli a smile that could melt hearts. “Can we film some of your training? Or if that’s not good, maybe film you teaching someone? I saw you with that kid the other day, and you’re really good at that.”

  He loved fighting, training, and being around the gyms, but Eli had never been a big fan of the media circus that came with the gig. Still, it wasn’t a bad idea, and if it would help Zack and Ringside, then it was the least he could do. “Sure. I’ll see what we can do, as long as it doesn’t interfere with training.”

  Grady clapped his hands together. “Sweet. Thanks, man.”

  Eli’s phone buzzed, and he pulled it from his locker.

  I need a sitter 2morrow night. U free?

  Grady chuckled. “I don’t know if that was a booty call or not, but the look on your face is awesome.”

  Eli glared at him. “It’s my ex. He needs a babysitter for his son.”

  “That’s Devan, right? The cute guy from upstairs?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I’m surprised he’s your ex the way you were going at it. I felt bad for interrupting your little tête-à-tête. Max was shocked when I told him about you being with someone.”

  Eli had been beyond annoyed with that interruption. He’d wanted nothing more than to engage in a make out session that would have put a teenager to shame. But he knew that taking things too far, too fast with Devan would only end up with them walking away from one another. That was something that he wouldn’t have. The spark that had always existed between them was still there, and the fact others could see it too gave Eli hope.

  “I guess I better let you get to your babysitting duties.” Grady pushed away from the lockers. “And don’t forget about the social media stuff.”

  Eli waved him off, his mind already focused on Devan. When and what time do you need me?

  2morrow night? If you’re training, I’ll get my regular sitter.

  No way Eli was going to let that happen. What time?

  7pm.

  I’ll be there.

  Annoyance and jealousy were competing inside him to break free, but Eli knew he had no right. This had been what he’d wanted to do for Devan, to make up for stepping into his date the other night. It would also give him a break from being hounded at the gym, and being alone at his mom’s house. Plus, Matthew was a damn cute baby.

  He could make this work, and maybe Devan would see that he wasn’t as horrible a person as he’d so far proven to be.

  Besides, how hard could it be to look after an eleven-month-old?

  Eli held Matthew in his arms, trying to determine exactly what the hell that smell was while wondering how it was possible for such a small being to cry nonstop for such a long period of time.

  “Come, on dude. I just changed your diaper.” Eli held him up, spun him around, and sniffed his ass again. “You did not crap yourself again.”

  When he spun Matthew back around, he was faced with a quivering mouth and watery eyes. “Da da da da.”

  “Your dad is out with some dude, little man. You’re stuck with me.” Eli hadn’t felt this much like a rookie since the first time he stepped in the ring.

  Matthew’s lip stuck out further.

  “Let’s get you changed again. Then . . .” He looked around the room. “Then I have no fucking idea.”

  Devan had been surprised when Pierce had invited him to dinner at the CN Tower restaurant. Despite growing up in Toronto, he’d only ever been to the top of the tower for school trips. The restaurant was pricier than what he’d
normally go for, but the view couldn’t be beat. “This is amazing.”

  Pierce was in his thirties, with short cut black hair and eyes so blue they didn’t look real. When he smiled, there was a sparkle to them that made his face light up. “It’s been a while since I’ve eaten here. I forgot how nice it is at night.”

  They’d agreed to go dutch, so at least Devan wouldn’t have to worry about an awkward bill exchange later. “I’m glad you suggested it. Normally I have my son with me, so I avoid places that are too fancy.”

  “His name’s Matthew, right?” Pierce looked right at Devan, leaning forward slightly. “How old is he?”

  “Eleven months. Almost a year.” There was something about the way Pierce spoke that made Devan feel as though he were under a microscope. “Do you have kids?”

  Ah, there was a bit of a chink in Pierce’s armor. He shook his head, looking a little sad. “No. I, ah. My marriage was to a girl I met in university. We were good friends, but I hadn’t figured out a few key things about myself.”

  “So you’re bi?” Devan realized that might have sounded bitchy, and held up his hands. “Not that it matters to me. I was only curious.”

  Pierce shrugged. “It’s fine. No, I’m gay. I was in denial for a long time. I only came out recently.”

  Devan couldn’t imagine how difficult that must have been. Men like Pierce, and even Eli for that matter, felt the need to keep who they were hidden from the world. Devan was thankful every day that he hadn’t been forced into a similar situation. “That must be a relief? Not having to hide?”

  “It is. It gives me the pleasure of going out with a charming man such as yourself.”

  Devan’s face heated. “Yeah, I’m not the charming one at the table.”

  Pierce chuckled. “Let’s take a look at the drink list.”

  Dear God, how could so much crap come out of such a small body? Not only had Matthew filled his diaper, but it had gone up his back. Devan hadn’t mentioned anything about giving Matthew a bath—like how to do it—but Eli was a smart man. He could figure this out.