by Aileen Erin
The sight of Lorne doubled-over seemed to snap Fynea out of her shock. “This is just great. It’s just grand. There’s two of you now, and I can’t even do my job.” She was muttering to herself as she tapped at her tablet.
I didn’t want Fynea upset. “Okay. What’s really going on?” Lorne was no help right now. I wasn’t sure if it was the pressure or the combo of my reaction plus Fynea’s, but he was content to stand there covering his mouth with his hand as he laughed.
“Lorne says that you need diplomatic immunity, which you would get as his wife and as the High Queen. He doesn’t think you need it because we’ve given them evidence, but he’s just looking for any excuse to marry you right now. It’s pathetic.”
Lorne straightened. “Why is it pathetic to want to marry my shalshasa? Especially right now when it could save her—and us—a major problem? Why is that wrong? Explain that one to me.”
“Because you’re supposed to have a proper wedding, with a beautiful gown and flowers and your parents and a reception and—”
I put my hand on Fynea’s arm to stop her. She’d been working on plans for our wedding ever since Lorne put the engagement ring on my finger. I knew whatever she’d been planning would’ve been the perfect Aunare event, fit for the High King. She’d been planning a dream wedding, and I was taking that away from her.
Yes, it wasn’t her wedding, but he was her High King. Her best friend. And she had a dream to make for him the perfect day.
I understood the disappointment, but she needed to understand that this was between me and Lorne. “I know you want Lorne to have the perfect day. I know how hard you’ve been working and—”
“I’m not upset about me.” Fynea huffed. “Okay. A little upset about me, but you two deserve something amazing. Lorne does because he’s my best friend, and I want the best for him because I love him dearly. But you, my dear. You have endured so much that it staggers me. You deserve a moment to shine and enjoy. You deserve a moment of triumph. The wedding I was planning would’ve been that for you, for Lorne, and for the Aunare. We need something to celebrate after hearing of all the horror and war and death, and your union would be that event that could unite us all. It would be a moment that would give us hope that we could overcome and heal everything that has gone wrong. If we could just hold out for it, then I know you’d be so happy—”
That she cared so much about me was… It was a lot. She was putting so much pressure on our wedding.
I wasn’t sure what to say, but I squeezed her arm and gave it a little shake to stop her from talking. “Thank you for wanting all of that for me and for our people. The wedding you were planning would’ve been epic and it sounds amazing, but you know, the triumph of enduring all that you just talked about? That’s something that I get to have every day I wake up here, with Lorne, in some amazing safe place, with food, and love. The only thing I want is Lorne. That’s it. The rest is just show.” I stepped back from Fynea and looked at Lorne, who was smiling down at me. “Let’s get married. Who’s here that can do it so that it’s legal?”
“Either of our head pilots can do it,” Lorne said. “As the ship’s captain, they can marry anyone on their vessel.”
“Great. Should we head that way?” I spun to walk to the bridge, but Lorne caught my wrist.
“Roan is setting up so that we can stream it, like he did with your classes.”
“Oh.” I guessed that made sense. “Okay.” I looked down at my clothes. If people were going to see it, then this probably wasn’t the best outfit choice. “I guess I should change.”
“What are you talking about? You guess you should change?” Fynea screamed. “Of course you need to change. You can’t get married in one of Lorne’s sweaters. That’s outrageous. You’re going to be the High Queen. Show some dignity, for the love of the Goddess.” She ripped the bottle of wyso out of my hands.
“Hey.” I reached for the bottle, but she marched over to one of the guards and handed it to him without pausing her rant.
She stomped her way back to us, still ranting. “And if you think that just because you’re—”
I started laughing because it was just too funny how upset she was getting. If it were her wedding, I would’ve tried to understand, but this one was mine. If Lorne and I didn’t care, then no one else should.
I stared into his aquamarine gaze, his eyes still glittered with amusement at Fynea’s outrage, and this—this—was why I’d lived through everything. For this moment with Lorne. This made every single bit of fighting worth it.
“Okay,” I said.
“Okay,” Lorne said.
Fynea took hold of my arm and placed her hand on the panel, opening the door I’d just come through. “At least you’ve showered already,” she muttered and I was starting to wonder if she was going to be okay. “Should’ve required Almya to be here. Who would’ve thought they’d refuse to be reasonable. Not me. No one listens to me anymore—”
I eyed Lorne as she half-dragged me through the door. Fynea might have truly cracked. “Help?” I mouthed to him.
Lorne shook his head and took a step back with his hands held out to his sides. “Better not risk upsetting her more.”
“You’re the High King,” I whisper-shouted at him as the door closed, and then I was alone with Fynea.
I started to pull my arm free, but she’d already let go. She stormed to the vidscreen and pushed a few buttons. A second later, Almya’s face popped on. She was in a larger room walking past desks of seamstresses busily working on her creations. “Yes, Princess Fynea?”
Fynea groaned. “Must you call me that? You know I hate it.”
Almya stepped into a quieter room and closed the door. “Apologies, Fynea. Habits die hard. How may I help you?” The image steadied as Almya sat down at a desk.
Fynea motioned me over. “This. Help me with this.”
My mouth dropped open. “I’m not a this. What the hell, Fynea.” She ranted at me, stole my wyso, and now I was a this?
Almya gave me a small smile of understanding before focusing on Fynea. “I’d be happy to help, but what occasion am I dressing her for?”
Fynea sent me a not-so-friendly stare. “I’m not sure you sent anything for this particular occasion.”
Almya’s grin faded. “I’m sure we can find something suitable. I packed everything she could possibly need, with instructions and labels for each outfit. The ships’ staff moved everything to the Telnon house and back again, but everything made the transfers intact. All of her clothes should be in Lorne’s secondary closet by the bed. There’s a catalog on the closet’s panel.” She tapped on her desk and a screen lit. “I’m looking now, but if you search via dress code for the event—”
Fynea swiped her hand through the air, cutting off Almya. “Yes. The clothes were transferred back into the closet. That’s fine. It’s the type of event that’s the problem. Wedding would be the one for today. I wouldn’t think you sent—”
“Congratulations,” Almya squealed and clapped her hands. “Yes. Yes, I absolutely sent her dress along with her.” She glanced at me. “I didn’t mean to overreach, but you and the High King are quite in love. I got this feeling whenever I saw the two of you together that you might decide to get married on a whim. I love it when I’m right.”
Almya really was getting to know me, but I was hung up on one particular word. “Dress?” I thought we were past this.
“No, it’s not a dress. I know you better than that.” Almya grinned at me. “I chose white because my research told me that it was the traditional Earther color of old. Not lately. They’ve mostly abandoned all the Earther wedding traditions these days with regards to formal marriages, but my research turned up the most gorgeous gowns.”
“Gown?” I said because that wasn’t in the cards. I wasn’t okay with a dress. I definitely wasn’t okay with a gown. A gown was like a mega dress.
Fynea walked to the closet and pressed the button to slide it open and started searching.
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“You have to trust me.” Almya tapped something on her desk. “My inventory shows it as the fifth hanger on the left. I chose to alter the gown design from the traditional Earther fashions in years past. Instead of a gorgeous dress, you’ve got a pair of white, slim pants with the usual hidden pockets you request. The top is a long-sleeved beaded bodice with a gauzy iridescent skirt high in the front, draping to train in the back. The train can separate from the bodice, should need arise, but—” She pressed her palms in prayer. “Please, please don’t tear it like you did that evergreen vest from last night. It would break my heart into a million pieces if this one got destroyed.”
I rolled my eyes. It wasn’t like I planned to get into fights all the time, but I liked to be ready for them. “I’ll do my best.” If I were in a fight, I wouldn’t care about ruining the clothes, but it wouldn’t do any good to tell Almya that. She’d worry and fret until the outfit was safely back on the hanger. Each piece she made was her baby.
“Found it.” Fynea turned to Almya. “Why in the Goddess’s name did you put sleeves on it? That’s not acceptable and—”
Almya got serious for the first time. “Pardon me, princess, but Amihanna doesn’t feel comfortable being so exposed. She prefers her arms covered, which is often not an option for someone of her stature, but if there’s one day when she should feel like the best version of herself, then it’s today.” She pressed her lips together. “And, I’ll have you know that the fabric of the sleeves is thin and gauzy and will light up to accentuate her natural Aunare glow. The crystals on the sleeves are placed perfectly above her fao’ana, so that when they are active, the crystals will glitter bright enough to light the galaxy. She will look radiant as she becomes the greatest High Queen we’ve ever had.”
Fynea gave a huff like she wasn’t sure she bought half of what Almya had said, but she handed me the hanger. “We’ll see how she looks in it.” She shoved me toward the bathroom.
Honestly, I was glad to be out of there. The way Fynea and Almya were glaring at each other made me feel incredibly awkward.
I let out a breath and hooked the hanger on the top of the shower door. It was time to get dressed.
I wasn’t sure what I felt as I put on the clothes or if I even felt anything other than contentment.
I’d had plenty of really bad days. Yesterday hadn’t been fun, but it didn’t even rank on my top ten worst days list. But today? Today would be a good day. Today would be an amazing day.
So, I quickly shed the comfortable leggings and my favorite sweater that I’d stolen from Lorne. I folded the clothes on the counter and pulled on the white pants, zipping them up at my left hip. Then, looked at the top. It was lacy and had tiny beads and jewels woven in to make it look like the lacy wave was actually made of glitter. The skirt flared out from the bottom of the bodice, and was made of an ethereal opalescent material that shifted colors depending on how you looked at it. The sleeves were so delicate, and I straightened one of them. She must’ve spent hours placing those crystals in just the right spots. They were sown in the same exact pattern and placement as my fao’ana.
Wow. No wonder Almya didn’t want me to rip it. I didn’t want to rip it, and usually I didn’t really care about the clothes that I wore. I couldn’t even imagine how many hours this took her to make.
I took some time putting on the top, and even pulled on my power a little so that I could make sure I had the sleeves lined up just right.
When I came out of the bathroom, Almya did a little squeal and a shimmy. “I took so much time going over the images of your fao’ana, but I wasn’t sure I had all the measurements right. I didn’t want to ruin the surprise and make you try it on, but I nearly did a few times. I can’t believe how perfect it turned out. How’s the fit? Does it feel okay? Do you feel as gorgeous as you look?”
I wished I had words for her, but I didn’t. I couldn’t say anything as I looked at myself in the mirror.
Fynea turned me so that she could look at me full-on. She stared at me for a moment—just long enough for me to start fidgeting—but then she smoothed the skirt and tugged the bodice up a little. She gripped one of my wrists and tugged my arm out to stare at the crystals.
After a moment, she dropped my wrist without saying another word.
Did she not like it? That seemed impossible, but why wasn’t she saying anything? “What’s wrong?” I started tugging on the top.
Fynea slapped my hand away. “Don’t. You’ll ruin it.” She lightly ran her fingers over the sleeves. “I thought Amihanna was being overly kind by hiring you,” she said to Almya without turning toward the screen. “I thought that it was her way of showing charity, but it wasn’t. Almya, you are amazing. This is true talent. This wedding gown is trendsetting royal fashion, the likes of which we haven’t seen in ages.”
Almya brushed away a tear. “Thank you, Fynea. This is truly my dream come true.”
I wasn’t sure what to say, but they didn’t seem to need me to say anything.
Fynea finally glanced away from the dress. “Well deserved,” she said to Almya. “This is breathtaking.”
It was. The gown—if it could be called that—was beautiful. I never thought I’d feel like a High Queen, but this made it seem as if maybe I could fill that role.
“If you would be so kind as to do her hair,” Almya said. “In the traditional Aunare style. Up with the—”
Fynea held up a hand. “I’m not sure I can do your creation justice, but I will strive to make it the best I can.”
Oh boy. That sounded like it was going to take forever.
Almya pressed her fist to her heart and bowed. “Thank you. I’ll leave you to it.” Almya waved to me. “Congratulations. You deserve the greatest of happiest days. May the Goddess shine brightly on your day.” And then the screen went blank.
Fynea stared at me again, and I wasn’t sure what she was thinking. But there was one thing that I wanted to make clear. “I wasn’t showing charity when I hired Almya.” I truly hadn’t been. “Her top was the only one that I actually liked in my closet. Aside from Lorne’s sweaters.”
Fynea shook her head at me. “You know you could have those sweaters made to your measurements. They’d be the same.”
“No. It wouldn’t be the same. I need his. They smell like him, and that makes me feel safe.”
Fynea made a face like she smelled something bad, and I wasn’t sure what I’d said to set her off. Did she think Lorne didn’t smell good? Because she was extremely wrong.
“What?” I asked.
“I wanted to be mad at this. I’d been planning the grandest wedding the Aunare had ever seen, and now all those meetings and designs—and they were amazing designs—are wasted. It was a wedding that would’ve made all the Aunare cheer for the two of you as our leaders and would’ve pushed us into a better era, and I was angry that the two of you were ruining that for our people.” She let out a breath. “I thought I was doing it for you and Lorne and the Aunare, but I’m realizing now it was more for the Aunare than anything else, and that wasn’t right. This is a marriage. It’s about you and Lorne. This is a wedding about love, not politics.”
I nodded. “It is.”
“All right then, let’s do the hair.” She scanned the room, searching for something. “Ah. There it is.” She crossed the room to the two chairs, and slid out an ottoman from under one.
“All right. We’re going to sit you right here, but you’re not going to sit on that train.” She carefully shoved me to sit on it, holding the back of the dress out so that I could sit without wrinkling it, and then moved behind me and started to section off my hair.
At first, I tried talking to Fynea while she worked, but she told me to shut up. She was concentrating. So, instead, I thought about marrying Lorne and what I wanted the future to look like for us. The future I’d cried for when I was on the rooftop last night. I wanted this war to be done already and to have that quiet life with him, but I knew we had so much to accomplish to
get there that it almost seemed impossible.
But maybe it wasn’t impossible. Maybe there was hope.
Braiding my hair took too long, but by the time she was done, my long dark hair had been twisted into a crown of rosettes. She did a light layer of makeup, and then placed her hands on my shoulders, giving them a squeeze. “All right. Let’s get you married.”
“Let’s get me married,” I whispered, and it felt huge. Important. And I wanted it more than anything I’d wanted in my life. I wasn’t nervous. I was ready.
She took my hands in hers, lifting me up, and then busied herself with the train. “Okay. Let’s go.”
We left Lorne’s quarters and started down the ship’s hallway.
A year ago, if someone had said I’d be getting married, I would’ve asked who was holding the gun and why couldn’t I get away. It was never something that had been in my plans. The closest I ever got to a relationship was what I’d had with Haden, and that didn’t work out. I realized quickly that I didn’t want or need anyone else in my life. Not like that.
But the day on Apollyon, on that ship when I was hurt and bleeding and on the verge of death and I first saw Lorne, everything shifted.
Everything changed.
Everything I thought I knew about myself wasn’t wrong, but it wasn’t right either. Because I didn’t need anyone in my life. I was right about that. But there was one person I desperately wanted.
Even when I ran from him and the idea of being betrothed.
Even when I tried to hide from him.
I wanted Lorne.
Maybe it was an elemental thing, but I just felt better, more balanced, more able to be me when I was with him.
I was proud of my past and how I survived. Every day I’d made choices to be safe, to hold on, to get through just one more day. Those choices led me here, to Lorne.
Beyond any doubt, saying yes to Lorne would be my favorite choice.
So, I’d go to him, and I’d keep saying yes.
Chapter Thirty-Five
