by Aileen Erin
I felt hands on my arms, holding me down, and I knew I was screaming again, so I stopped. I stopped pushing my power into new shards and suddenly I could hear a little. The clack-clack of faksano.
This had to be working. Possibly. I was still in a lot of pain, so it was hard to tell. But I could’ve sworn the pain from those four shards was now gone.
Jesmesha was right. I might really be able to get rid of the lucole in my brain.
I tried it again, releasing my power at more of them at once—at the little bits of pain all in the front right side of my head. I screamed, ripping my hand free from whoever was holding it to grab my head. It was as if someone had slammed a sharp dagger into my skull. My back arched off the floor and the hand grabbed mine again, gripping it tighter, but after a few breaths, the pain from those shards disappeared. It wasn’t a lot, but it was enough for me to know it was working.
I did it again. And again. I focused on hitting more of them at once in one area. It made the pain almost too much to bear—but it was brief. I could withstand anything as long as it was short, fast, and over.
I pulsed my power again. Again. Until the last shard shattered into nothingness and I was left gasping, sweating, crying on the floor.
I blinked and my vision cleared, and all I could see was Lorne. His skin flashing bright. His aquamarine eyes staring into mine.
“I’m okay.” My voice sounded raspy and weak, but at least I could hear again. “I’m okay.” The lie was desperately transparent. I wasn’t okay. I wasn’t even in the same galaxy as okay. But I knew I would be.
Lorne started to cry, his forehead pressed to my stomach.
I wove my fingers through his soft, dark hair. “I destroyed the lucole.”
He jerked up, eyes bright with tears flowing down his face. “I don’t understand. How?”
I wasn’t sure I had the energy or ability to try to explain it. “Jesmesha told me I could do it. So, I did it.” I’d try to go into more detail later. I honestly didn’t have the energy. I’d never felt so drained, but I was alive. That’s all that mattered.
He looked at me like I’d lost my mind, and I had. I really probably had.
A door slammed and Fynea appeared at the top of the stairs. “We found Audrey.”
I couldn’t see much of the room, but there were signs of a fight—tablets, chairs, people on the floor. From what I could see, the only ones left standing were my guards, Roan, and Fynea.
Whatever fight had happened while I’d been out of it was over, which meant, we had to go.
I tapped on Lorne’s shoulder. “Let me up. We have to go.”
“Not a chance in hell.” He ran his hand down his face. “I can’t take much more of you getting hurt. You need a pod and rest and Goddess only knows what else.”
“What happened here?” Fynea raced down the stairs to stand over me. “What happened to her?”
I wasn’t sure how to explain it, so instead, I went with the important part. “I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. Your face is covered in blood.” She ran off to the tables. I heard a crash and a splash and then she dropped next to me. She pressed a wet cloth to my face and started wiping. “Goddess. So much blood. Too much blood. Why isn’t anyone doing anything? And the ships in orbit are under attack, but holding strong. We have coms back but you weren’t answering. Can we tell them to engage, your majesty?”
Lorne said something sharply in Aunare. “Yes. Destroy anyone who attacks. We’re at war with the alliance.”
Oh shit. I knew that was how it was going to end up, but I hated that he’d worked so hard to maintain the alliance for so long only for it to fall apart.
I took the wet cloth from Fynea and she stepped back, watching me carefully.
“Are you truly okay?”
I opened my mouth and then realized I didn’t have a good answer. So I shrugged. “I’m alive and I intend to stay that way.”
Her eyes turned glassy but she pressed her fist to her heart and then looked at Lorne. “Against how many alliance members are we declaring war?”
Lorne took the now-bloody cloth from me and met Fynea’s gaze. “All of them. Tek won’t have sorted out the traitors yet. We attack anyone who attacks us.”
“Good. That makes things easier.” She nodded, and tapped on her wrist unit. “The allies are already scattering like the fechtr bugs they are.” She looked at me again. “You don’t have any marks, but the blood… It was the lucole poison?”
“I’m fine,” I said again, because I was. We could just forget however long I was screaming on the floor like I was having some sort of weird mental break.
“No, you’re not.” Everyone in the room—my guards, Fynea, Roan, Lorne yelled at me.
I shoved Lorne away and sat up. My balance wobbled a little, and Lorne lifted me in his arms. I wanted to walk, but I didn’t have the strength to even sit up on my own. My head felt cold, and when I touched the back of my head, my fingertips came back red.
I glanced down, and apparently I’d lost a lot of blood because there was a pool of blood where my head had rested on the floor. “Oh shit.” I pointed to it. “That’s not good.”
Lorne held me tighter and brushed a kiss on my forehead. “No. It wasn’t good.”
I looked around the room. It’d been packed before, but now was empty. “What happened?”
“Most ran with Jason. A few stayed to fight, but they were no match for our guards, and—”
“You didn’t kill Jason?” I wanted to be sure I heard that right because he was right there—right fucking there—and now he was gone.
“You were dying.” Lorne gripped me tighter. “Dying. I wasn’t leaving your side to run after that little shit.”
Fair point. “I…”
The door slammed again, and Tyler appeared at the top of the stairs with a group of our guards behind him. “We have to go. Now. Before they leave and we can’t find them. Please. The trackers say they’re taking off and—”
I nodded. I might’ve almost died, but I wasn’t dead yet.
My head was swimming a little, and I knew couldn’t walk, let alone run or fight, but I was breathing. The pain was mostly gone, and all that I was left with was exhaustion. I was fine.
Lorne might not get that I was fine yet, but he would. I would let his anxiety about my I-don’t-know-what-number near death that he’d seen, but I wasn’t letting that stop us from saving Audrey.
“We have to get Audrey. Please.” I looked up at him. “She’s saved my life so many times. Please. We have to.”
“I know. I know, I just…” Lorne gripped me tighter in his arms. “Don’t let go.” He took off running through the halls with Fynea leading the way and surrounded by our guards. If there were enemies left in the capital building, they didn’t show up and they didn’t matter.
Not right now.
Nothing mattered to me until we had Audrey back.
Then I could relax.
Hell, I might even get in a pod voluntarily because as Lorne raced through the hallways, the walls looked like waterfalls, the floor looked like it was falling out from under his feet, and the lights looked like bursts of rainbow glitter.
I definitely wasn’t okay.
Chapter Forty
LORNE
I ran onto the roof of the capital building toward the on-planet transport vehicle, cradling Amihanna tight against my body. She was too limp and light in my arms, and I wanted her in a pod immediately, but we needed to get Audrey, Yneia, and the other two lab techs before SpaceTech tried to leave Yhonaian space, and our former allies were currently attacking our fleet.
“Fynea! Update,” I yelled.
I spotted Tek Ze Eta on the roof waiting by our vehicles. I didn’t know what he needed, but I’d deal with him and the Yhona later. I wasn’t sure I could trust them again, but I wasn’t counting them as an enemy. At least not yet. Tek had saved them from that fate.
“The convoy is currently engaged in defensive battle,” Fy
nea yelled back at me. “Shields are holding across the fleet. No loss or damage yet. A good portion of our enemies have already retreated and are fleeing. It seems two warships is more than enough to deter them.”
Thank the Goddess. “Good.” Our allies might have forgotten how well the Aunare could defend and fight, but after today, most of the alliance would come crawling back.
I needed the echoes of Amihanna’s screams to fade from my mind before I could even look at them, let alone speak to them diplomatically. That would take some time.
I slid Amihanna onto the vehicle’s back bench and noticed that my shirt was now wet. It was mostly black, but the firedrake across my chest showed splotches of darker red. Her blood. My stomach clenched and the terror of watching her slip away from me rose again.
Goddess take it.
Four in. Eight out. Eight in.
I crawled into the vehicle and knelt on the floor in front of her. The dark sweater she was wearing clung to her skin and she was shivering. I gripped the bottom of her sweater. “Arms up.”
“Huh?” She looked confused, and her arms shook as she lifted them anyway.
I tugged the blood-soaked sweater off of her. Underneath, she was wearing a tank—which was also wet—but the sweater was like a sponge. It had to go. I tossed it to the floor of the vehicle and sat next to her.
Fynea stuck her head in the door. “Everything okay?”
No. Nothing was Goddess-damned okay. “Get in.”
She didn’t hesitate. A moment later, Tyler and Roan followed her.
Eshrin slid in on the other side of Amihanna, med kit in hand.
“You have to be kidding me,” Amihanna said when she saw the kit.
“No,” I shouted, and then took a breath. “No,” I said much quieter this time. “He’s not kidding. Don’t even try to tell me you weren’t passing out in my arms just now.”
She stared at me and then looked away.
Right. Exactly.
“I’m tracking the ship that most likely has Audrey and the rest of our missing people,” Ashino asked from the front. “Permission to take off, your majesty?”
“Please.” My skin was too bright. Much too bright. I closed my eyes and leaned back against the bench as soon as I felt the vehicle start to lift off the ground. I didn’t need to be able to see everyone in the car watching me to know they were. I could feel it, but I was seconds away from losing control.
Three in. Six out. Four in.
No one spoke as we flew. Only the sounds of Eshrin running scans broke the silence.
Fingers twined with mine. Amihanna. She was here. She was alive. I wasn’t sure how or what had happened to her in there, and I wasn’t ready to hear it yet. I needed control first.
I gripped Amihanna’s hand harder—as if holding it would keep her with me forever—and dropped my chin to my chest. How did this keep happening? How did I keep almost losing her?
“I’m fine.” Amihanna’s voice sounded strong and confident enough that I opened my eyes.
She was twisted in her seat, her cheek resting against the back so that she could watch me. “Eshrin’s going to tell you I’m just fine.” Her calm tone smoothed out the rough edged panic that had my heart still pounding in my chest.
“No, I’m not,” Eshrin said.
My gaze went to him. I waited for him to say more, but he was busy replacing Audrey’s special lucole detecting device on Amihanna’s forehead with the more standard scan. “What’s wrong?”
“She’s got brain trauma again, which we knew was very likely. But she’s very low on blood. I’m not sure how she hasn’t passed out by now, except pure stubbornness.”
“Hey!” Amihanna sounded insulted.
“You stand up too fast and you’ll be down long enough for us to get you back to the ship and shove you in a pod.” Eshrin met her glare with one of his own. “Deny it.”
She couldn’t. Anyone who knew her or her story understood that it was only through pure stubbornness that she was able to survive so much.
She’d proven that again today.
Eshrin put a healing patch on her head. Then another on her chest.
I understood the one on her head, but was there something wrong with her heart? “What’s that one for?”
“I’m regulating her blood pressure, your majesty. Her heart is struggling—”
My skin started brightening, and Amihanna’s hand squeezed mine. “I’m fine.
“No, you’re not.” Did she not hear what Eshrin had just said?
“If I didn’t believe I’d be able to keep her fine until she got to a proper healer, I would’ve told you. Ashino wouldn’t have bothered to take the time to track Audrey’s ship. All of this is fixable, your majesty. Especially now that Audrey’s sensor shows that the lucole is in fact out of her system.”
It really was? “How—”
“Approaching the ship,” Ashino said from up front. “How would you like me to proceed?”
I glanced at Tyler. He was bent over his legs, head in his hands, and it looked like he was trying not to throw up.
I glanced at Amihanna, and I understood completely. His future was on that ship, and there was nothing he could do to help right now.
I couldn’t help Amihanna—she was always too busy saving herself for me to do anything—but hopefully I could save Audrey.
“Send out a com,” I said to Fynea. “Tell them to surrender to our warship and we won’t fire on them.”
“They’re speeding up,” Ashino said. “Engage?”
Tyler straightened in his seat, eyes wide with panic. “No,” Tyler shouted. “You could hurt her. Please.”
“Who took her?” Amihanna asked. She looked tired, her coloring was pale, but her voice didn’t show even a hint of what she’d just been through. From what Eshrin said, her head had to be hurting. “Please tell me it was SpaceTech.”
He tapped a few buttons, zooming in on the view of the ship. “Yes. That’s a SpaceTech ship. Why?”
“What kind of ship? I need the exact model,” she asked.
“I… I don’t know.” Ashino shook his head, clearly just as confused as I was. “How am I supposed to tell? Are there markings?”
“Roan? I can’t see from here, and stupid Eshrin is right. If I move to get a better look…”
She was going to pass out, and yet she’d tried to walk from that meeting room. Why was she so stubborn?
I loved her. I truly wouldn’t be able to do this without her, but she was making it so hard to protect her. If I could lock her away and keep her safe forever, I’d do it. But I’d tried that once before and it didn’t go well.
Roan leaned forward, getting into Ashino’s space. “Uhh. Can you zoom in right there, to the left, I think—” Roan made a noise. “Got it. Okay. It’s a Class G. Come on. Where’s the—okay. Yeah. It’s got that weird flap on the side. That’s the 124-U5.”
Amihanna closed her eyes, and I thought she was in pain for a second, but then she opened them. “Okay. Okay.” She turned to me. “I would try to do it, but I just… I don’t have the energy for it. But I mean, you can do it.”
I waited for her to explain more, but she went quiet. “What do you need me to do?”
“Sorry.” She licked her lips. “Gross. That tasted like blood.” She gagged. “Sorry. Power systems for the 124 Class G series… The U5 is a little different. You need to hit a very specifically targeted area. On the right. Two inches from the edge of the ship, one inch from the bottom. Area is like half an inch in diameter, so not a lot of room for error, but I definitely saw you take out a room full of weapons with your eyes closed. You can do this better than I could on my best day.”
“What happens if I hit it right on target?”
“You take that section out, the ship stalls out. Won’t blow up. Won’t have to engage or chase. It’s just dead in the water.”
I stared at her for a long second. “What? How do you know that?”
Amihanna gave me a sly smile. �
��I got licensed to fly on every ship I could—last count was like twenty-nine or something.”
“Thirty-two, babe,” Roan cut in. “Thirty-fuckin’-two.”
She shrugged. “Whatever. I have a bunch, but I memorized every Earther ship. I wasn’t sure what I could save up to afford and what state the ship might be in. If I could buy a junker or something damaged and fix it myself, then—none of this matters right now. Shit. My mind is loopy and I know I’m a mess right now, but that’s the spot. I promise. Hit it. Let’s get Audrey back.”
I studied her for a second, but she just slouched back against the bench.
I wasn’t sure how it was possible that she knew the exact workings of this particular ship, but—
“Trust her,” Roan said. “Am knows her SpaceTech ships. Girl studied like crazy. Every engineering manual she could get her hands on since we were kids. Am needed off planet like crazy. We knew she was on a countdown for them to find her, so she studied like her life depended on it. And it did. She can fix any ship, and if she says that’s what you need to hit, that’s what you need to hit. Do it.”
I ran a hand down my face. This was insane.
Amihanna’s skin was still pale, and the healing patches on her forehead and chest were strobing blue-green-yellow over and over again, showing that they were working at max capacity. But she didn’t look away when I stared at her.
“Trust me,” Amihanna said with complete confidence. “Hit it exactly where I said.”
“What happens if I don’t hit that exact spot?”
“You miss, the ship blows up.” She shrugged. “Don’t miss.”
I glanced at Tyler, waiting for his okay. There was risk and Audrey was his. I knew if the situations were reversed, I’d want a say in how we got Amihanna back.
Tyler looked from me to Amihanna and back again. He still seemed like he was going to throw up, but he was holding it together. “I don’t know anything about a spot in the ship to make it lose power. Ships weren’t my deal. Not on Earth. Not on Abaddon. But the girl passed that test to fly the mining ships in no time flat. Didn’t even study really and no one ever passed that test. They made it impossible. She’s wicked smart. If that’s what she says to hit, then that’s what you’ve got to hit. But… Just be careful.”
