by Various
“Good. She’d have been worried.” Why did he suddenly feel so weighted down by all of this? A moment ago it was good, it was free and easy.
“Yes, my flatmate will be worried too.” Lily’s expression had also grown more serious. She cast an accusing glance in Seth’s direction.
“That’s different,” he countered, quickly, a heavy frown developing on his forehead.
“Why?” Adrian asked.
“If my department tracks down the bloke Lily saw, she can go home.” Seth grew tense, his cheeks working as if he was grinding his teeth. “This will be sorted soon, Lily, I promise, and you’ll be able to get back to your regular life.”
Silence descended on them. Adrian felt gutted. Ultimately he was in a lose-lose situation. If Lily was gone, this would be so much worse, but he hated that she was here because of him. Confused, and regretting he had asked, he stood up. “I’m going to take a shower.”
“Are you okay?” Lily said, concerned. “You already had a shower,”
“I need another.” He paused, looked back, and smiled her way. “I’m okay, just need to think.”
Limping off down the hallway, he realized that no amount of thinking—or showering—was going to help this particular problem. The one he’d unexpectedly found himself burdened with, the one that was extra to the Carlisle court case and everything that came with that. He didn’t want Lily to be here, but he did. Whilst he recognized that she was making the most of a bad lot, she’d never be able to forgive him not afterwards, not after they got back to their real life, and that brought him a whole of pain.
* * * *
Seth knew they were both upset, and he knew it was because they were talking about what they’d left behind. Adrian had to come to terms with it, but Lily didn’t. He had to out Lavonne, then she could go.
Simple as that. Except it wasn’t.
Looking over at her, he felt as if he’d learned so much about her in these few days. He’d begun to know what made her tick, and he knew it was taking a lot of inner strength for her not to balk right now, not to shuck off his authority and make life difficult again. He was prepared; sometimes the witnesses needed to let off steam. Better that they attack him for his role in this than walk out and into danger. And she, more than anyone, had the right to attack him. He needed to sort it, needed to find a way to safely have Lavonne arrested so that she could go back to her normal life. No reason not to, right?
Problem was he was thinking about ways to do that less and less as time went by, because he liked having her there. He was honest with himself on that score. Nevertheless, it rested a heavy sense of guilt on his shoulders.
“Tell me about the online chat thing,” he said, asking about the grey area in his understanding of her.
“What about it?” She looked as if she thought he might be judging her.
“How did you get into it? I’m just curious.” He reached out and teased her tootsies with his.
She foot wrestled him, and then rested her head back on the cushions. “Oh, well it was kind of a joke, at first. I haven’t had a proper relationship since I was in training as a nurse. When Andrea, my flatmate, made the decision to open the sandwich boutique, I left nursing, and things only got busier. We’re in the first year of a new business.”
“That’s hard work.”
“Yes, in fact these past few days have actually felt like a bit of a holiday for me, one I probably needed.” She paused, a frown gathering between her eyebrows. “Anyhow, we have this guy who delivers salad and fruit to the boutique.”
“Fruit?”
“Yes, some people like grapes in their brie-and-salad baguette.”
He grimaced.
She threw him an amused look. “We need to educate your taste buds.”
“When it comes to food, I have simple tastes.” When it comes to women, I seem to be attracted to you, and you are so much more complex than I’d ever have guessed.
Where did that thought come from?
“People can change.”
There was a teasing expression on her face and she wore a half smile. What was she thinking? He’d love to know.
“So, this guy Carlo,” she continued, “he is recently divorced and he’s always going on about meeting these sexy women online. We thought he was joking or that he was using dating agencies, but when we asked him about it, it turned out he was using chat rooms. For him it’s too soon to get involved with another woman properly, but he likes to keep his chat-up skills polished just in case—or so he says.” She smiled at that point.
Seth wondered if she had a soft spot for Carlo.
“For me it was different reason, very little time, and I was just looking for a bit of fun.” She shrugged. “Honestly, it was just a giggle to begin with. In fact, the first time Andrea and I logged in together and pretended we were twins.” She laughed, remembering. “We said we were looking for one guy, to share…we got dozens of men wanting to chat with us.”
“I can imagine.”
“We literally ran away, laughing. It was way over the top. Then I went in on my own one time, and I happened to get chatting with Adrian.”
He stared at her, reflecting how lucky Adrian must have felt conversing with her, then meeting her. He also reflected on all the losers and weirdoes she might have met and might still meet, doing that, and it worried him.
“Did you know there’s a stack of food in the freezer?” They had sat in a comfortable silence for a minute or so. Didn’t she want to talk about it anymore?
“No, I hadn’t checked.”
“I’m hungry,” she explained, “You two are keeping my appetite up. I did a bit of exploring earlier. How does fish and chips sound for tonight?”
“Now you’re talking.”
“I thought you’d approve.”
A secret smile lit her expression, and it was right then that Seth finally admitted to himself that it didn’t matter that she was here because of Adrian. That was then, this was now. She wanted him as well. She’d wanted him when she’d come onto him outside Adrian’s office, and it hadn’t gone away. For all her prickly attitude towards him and the flippant remarks about enjoying the moment, he could read the signals. God knows he’d had enough time in close quarters with people. He learned to read how they really felt, no matter what words came out of their mouth. Desire was there in her expression, in the things she didn’t say and the way she acted, everything about her told her what he needed to know.
I shouldn’t care, he told himself. But he couldn’t help it.
She rose to her feet and walked to the curtains, peeking out between them. She was looking longingly at the patio and the landscaped garden beyond. It was a look he’d seen many times before, the familiar look of a caged creature, begging to be free. Why did it bother him that she looked so caged? He’d protected witnesses so many times before, and almost every time he’d seen people start to look this way when their confinement became a burden and they wanted to be free, but this time he was thinking about in a different way. He felt her pain, her longing, and it was because they were involved.
It had been an incredibly intense time, the three of them living a fantasy many owned but never fulfilled. Four great days, days he’d never forget, but he shouldn’t have done it, because he couldn’t help himself, not when it came to Lily. It had to end, soon.
“It looks so beautiful out there this morning. Not as sunny as it was, but the sky is roaring. It’s such a beautiful spot. I’d love to explore. Another time, of course.”
The fact she liked his childhood home made him smile, he couldn’t help it. Then she turned around and the look of yearning on her face made him feel so bloody bad.
Shit. I could do without this.
The sense of responsibility he felt towards her, a woman he’d got involved with—the only woman he’d got involved with under these circumstances—was different, definitely. He felt he owed her more, which is why he shouldn’t have got involved in the first place. If he start
ed making concessions to security for her, as he was tempted to do, weak points would be opened up. Even so, he nodded. “I could turn the alarms off, if you want to go outside for a few quick breaths of air.”
Fool, if a local is walking in the fields beyond the gardens and saw that someone is staying here, when it should be closed up and empty, they’ll investigate, or report it to the police, which would open up a line for Lavonne.
Her eyes lit up. “You’d do that?”
Surely they couldn’t be that unlucky, to be spotted inside a minute? “Just for one minute, and only if you stay on the patio, close to the house.”
She masked her disappointment, but not before he caught it. She wandered over. “I’d really appreciate it, just to breathe that crisp air and get some natural light.”
He went to the hall to switch off the alarms at the main box, ad she followed, clinging to his arm as if it was Christmas and he was giving her the best present in the world. While he flicked the alarm switches off, he dealt out the rules. “I need to be able to see you at all times, and I want you to stay close to the doors so that you’re not visible to anyone who might be walking on the land beyond the gardens. There’s a public footpath there, and occasionally people pass through.”
“We are safe here, aren’t we?” She stared at the alarm box, as if he’d put the doubt in her mind.
It was no bad thing, but still…he hated to see the worried expression of face. “Yes, very safe, as safe as we can be right now. I just have to remain vigilant. It’s my job.”
“Thanks Seth, I appreciate this.” She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him quickly. It was like a promise. Her kisses always felt like promises.
When they walked back to the patio doors, he paused and stroked her hair back from her face. “I’m sorry it can’t be more than a minute.”
She nodded. He opened the door and she wandered out.
He stood in the doorway watching as she walked up and down the patio a mere three feet away from where he was in the doorway. She was following his rules. Shielding her eyes, she looked first at the landscape beyond, and then she looked at the border shrubs that ran along the patio. If Gareth, his stepfather, had been here, he’d be out there with her telling her the names of the various plants. He always did that when a guest showed interest. They’d like Lily, his parents. She was warm and vivacious. He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand, wondering at the way his thoughts had wandered. It was Lily; she got him so easily distracted. That was not a good thing.
She wrapped her arms close around herself, and he knew that she was cold. It was pretty obvious that she didn’t care. She was dressed so inappropriately for a winter morning, he noticed, with that short skirt and the high heels.
It’s because she is dressed for a date, a sexy date in London, with Adrian.
I just got lucky and got in on the act.
He cursed himself under his breath. It just wasn’t right, any of it. The most important rules of his job were to always remain vigilant, and never get emotionally involved. What was wrong with him? He was failing to concentrate. Perhaps he was too old for the job. It happened. Whatever it was, the niggling doubts he had faded as he watched Lily. She was coming back to the house.
“My minute is up, thank you.” A smile hovered around her mouth. Once he stood back, she stepped outside the door and looked at him. “I need to ask you for something.”
That sounded heavy. “Go ahead.”
Her cheeks turned pink. “I need some underwear.”
He frowned. “Underwear?”
“I only had the one pair of knickers, obviously.” She flashed him a glance that showed she really didn’t want to have to ask him about this. “I’ve been washing them and drying them on the radiator overnight, but you tore them, yesterday.”
“Right.” Staring at her, he felt stupid. He should have thought of it. Normally his witnesses in protection were prepared, at least with an overnight bag. Not this one. With Adrian it was easy; he’d passed on some of his own gear. He hadn’t even thought about Lily, except how good she looked in what she was wearing. Then again, when he was thinking about her underwear, he was mostly thinking about taking it off.
He shook his head. Yep, he was well and truly a lost cause over this woman. “Come on, I’m sure we can find you something, upstairs.”
Lily cocked her head on one side as she looked up at him, but didn’t comment. He locked the patio doors and took her hand, leading her into the hallway.
“Hold on.” He walked over to the control panel and flicked the alarms back on. Lily watched, and nodded. She followed him up the staircase, looking around with curiosity. There were several more rooms on the first floor that she hadn’t seen before. Seth led her to another staircase, at the top of which was the door he’d checked was locked at the outset. She stared at the private sign on the door. Seth unlocked the door and ushered her in, watching as she walked into the private space.
“Oh, wow, what a fantastic view.” She walked across the sitting area to the picture window, which was directly above the patio she’d been on earlier. Gareth, his step dad, plotted and planed all his planting from up here. His aerial view, as he called it.
Seth shut the door and walked in, glancing around. He’d been here just a few weeks before, at Christmas, but he was seeing it through her eyes.
“Oh, my God, this is you.” She’d lifted a framed photo from the sideboard.
Shit. He strode over and snatched it out of her hand, but she wrestled him for it, grasping it in both hands and holding it up next his face, chucking as she did so. “What were you, eighteen?”
Seth could have kicked himself, he hadn’t thought this through. “Thereabouts.”
She looked at it from under her lashes, and that knowing look that women got appeared on her face. “I bet you had lots of female attention. I certainly would’ve been interested.”
Seth reached for the photograph when she was off guard, putting it back in its position on the sideboard.
Her expression grew more serious, and he knew the penny had dropped. “This isn’t a safe house at all, is it? This is your family home.”
Seth gritted his teeth.
“But that’s not your name on the license by the door. Your name is Jones, isn’t it?”
She was good. “My mum remarried.”
She looked at him thoughtfully and then her eyes rounded and she stared at him as if horrified. “If this isn’t the safe house…and you brought us here.” She slowed, truly freaked. “You’re not…you’re not working for this man, Carlisle, are you?” She didn’t exactly back away, but she looked as if she was about to.
Seth grasped her around the shoulders, hating to see the mistrust that had risen in her expression. “No. There was a reason why I couldn’t take Adrian to the designated safe house.”
“What reason?”
Shit. He’d have to tell her, because she wouldn’t feel safe with him. If he didn’t tell her she would keep asking and then Adrian would find out. “I’ll explain why, if you promise to keep it to yourself. Adrian has got enough on his mind; I don’t want to add to his worries. Promise me you won’t tell him what I’m about to tell you?”
“Yes, if you feel that’s the right thing to do.”
Was she starting to accept his authority? He thought she’d just mellowed, but she really was playing along. He was glad of that. “That man you saw in the corridor, the one who took a shot at Adrian.”
“Yes?”
“I also saw him, from the fire escape. And I recognized him. He’s a fellow officer.”
Her eyes rounded. “You mean…”
“My guess is he’s on Eric Carlisle’s payroll. Once I knew that, I couldn’t risk taking Adrian to the safe house. A policeman in the same department as me can access that information on the system. This seemed like the best alternative option. ” He glanced around the familiar room. “My parents run this place; it’s where I grew up. They have an eight-week break in Spain ev
ery year, January and February.”
“Right. So why don’t you report him to the police, to your guys?”
“It’s knowing who to trust.”
“I see.” She stared at him with a heavy expression. “I understand that, believe me. The reason I left nursing, it was partly to do with a senior member of staff who I didn’t think was acting appropriately with a patient’s care. I took it into my own hands. It was the right move, but my senior got annoyed and said I couldn’t accept authority, that I’d acted without her agreement. The hospital backed her up. I handled it the wrong way, and I left, but deep down I know I did the right thing for the patient.”
For several moments, they stared into each other’s eyes, acknowledging the common ground. Then he found himself scooping her in against him to hold her. With her hands wrapped around his back, it felt natural, it felt good.
He didn’t want to have to tell her, tell either of them, but when he held her in his arms that sense of loneliness that he always nursed evaporated for a few moments. “I need to make contact with my boss, but I’m not going to use a phone or e-mail or anything that can pinpoint a location to anyone in the office.”
“It all makes sense now.” She looked up at him. “Any other ideas?”
“I’m working on it.”
“Can you send your boss an e-mail from an anonymous Hotmail account?”
“IP addresses can be traced.” As he said it he noticed his step dad’s computer on a small desk in the corner of the room, and an idea started to form. It was the mention of the Hotmail account. He had one that he rarely used. “Wait, hold that thought. You might have something there.”
The PC was old, and ran on a slow modem. His step dad only used it to run a simple web site advertising the hotel, and his mother occasionally sent Seth family photos to his Hotmail account. Seth walked over and switched the thing on.
“You’ve had an idea?” Lily was beside him as he took up the seat at the desk.
“Maybe.” He did, but by the time he’d got online and opened his account, doubt had slowed him up. He paused, thinking carefully through the idea. It was dangerous, everything was dangerous, but it was the least dangerous thing he’d thought of so far.
