If only Leah could calm herself, she’d be able to join the family. But how did one calm the kind of anger Leah felt? It was a once-in-a-lifetime kind of anger, the type that erupted from deep wells of disappointment and rejection. Leah’s outrage was hot with spite and prickly with indignation.
Leah paced the length of the walkway in front of the church, trying to soothe her anger. But the rage wouldn’t subside.
She was the one who’d traveled to Washington to rescue Caleb from that horrible hospital. She was the one who’d stayed up night after night to nurse him. And yet all of Caleb’s attention had been for the beautiful Lucinda. He hadn’t even bothered to introduce his wife to the woman.
Beauty. Leah wanted to spit the word into the dusty road. Lucinda had it. Blond ringlets and moss-green eyes, porcelain skin and peony-pink lips. Leah imagined rubbing mud into the woman’s perfect face.
What was wrong with her? She knew what the Bible said about anger: “The wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.” Yet there she was, allowing rage to blind her.
Leah looked at the church and pictured Caleb and the children enjoying a cozy repast with Lucinda. Caleb probably wished he hadn’t rushed to marry Leah, now that the lovely Lucinda was available. Olivia would have certainly preferred the fancy Lucinda to plain Leah.
Perhaps Leah should march into that church and make it clear Caleb belonged to her. She was his wife whether he liked it or not.
Sharp pain pierced Leah’s heart as that thought took root. She was Caleb’s wife whether he liked it or not.
And he probably didn’t like it.
Like a swollen stream seeping its way upward, Leah’s anger finally reached her eyes. Hot tears of fury streamed down her face. She’d never be able to calm herself now. It would be better for everyone if she simply left.
Without another thought, she turned on her heel and marched down the dirt road away from Caleb Whitaker and his family.
With each step her anger vacillated between righteous indignation and self-censure. Who was she to rage against her circumstances? She’d agreed to the marriage, hadn’t she? And it wasn’t a bad life. She had a home and children who loved her. Some women had much less.
But hadn’t she earned her keep? She’d cooked and cleaned, mended Stephen’s clothing and sewn new dresses for Olivia, and once the honey harvest was complete, she’d add to her new family’s finances. Hadn’t she earned even a little respect?
Apparently not. All it had taken was a wink from a pretty woman, and Caleb had discounted everything she’d done. Well fine. Leah wouldn’t beg for his esteem.
A horse approached her from behind, and Leah moved to the edge of the roadside to give the rider space to pass, but the hoofbeats slowed to a stop.
A familiar voice called to her. “Leah, where are you going?”
She whirled. Caleb sat atop a bay horse, a puzzled look on his face. “Whose horse is that?”
“Reverend Harrison’s.” Caleb twisted in the saddle so that he could see her better. “I repeat, where are you going?”
Leah wiped the tears from her face. “Home.”
“That’s over five miles from here. Awfully far to walk when there’s a perfectly good surrey waiting for you.”
As if she’d simply sit in his surrey and wait for him to finish his coffee and cake. “Won’t Lucinda be missing thee about now? Hurry back, Caleb, and perhaps she’ll let thee drive her home.” Caleb dismounted and stood in front of her, frowning. “Lucinda’s not at the church. She went home with her parents.” “Oh really? Is she waiting for thee there?”
“I don’t think so.” Caleb cocked his head, as though trying to solve a particularly onerous problem, and then smiled broadly. “Why, Leah Wall. You’re jealous.”
“My name is Leah Whitaker!” she shouted. “Whitaker! In case thee has forgotten, thee is a married man!”
Caleb drew back, as though slapped by her words. “I know I’m a married man. I’m here at your side, aren’t I?”
“But thee doesn’t want to be, does thee? Thee would rather be at Lucinda’s side.”
“That silly girl? I’d sooner spend the day having a tea party with Olivia’s dolls than spend an hour with Lucinda.”
“Thee said, ‘Call me, and I’ll be there.’”
Caleb shrugged one shoulder. “What else was I supposed to say? Don’t call on me?”
Leah blew out a breath and considered Caleb’s words.
Lucinda had been flirting. There was no denying it. But maybe Leah had overreacted to Caleb’s words. She eyed her husband with guarded relief. “She is a beautiful woman.”
“She’s pretty enough, but she’s not a woman. She’ll always be a needy little girl who gets what she wants through trickery and flirtation. I’ve never been interested in her.”
“Never?”
“Never. Lucinda’s older sister was a friend to my late wife, and I know firsthand just how devious Lucinda can be. What I want in a wife is someone I can rely on. Not someone I have to rescue every day.”
Leah looked at the dirt road. Confusion mixed with shame as she considered the words she’d shouted at her husband. She’d been taught God’s holy light lived within her, but where was her inner light now? Buried under anger and resentment.
Caleb shifted his weight and glanced down the road. “Now, if you’re feeling better, will you return to the church so we can all drive home together?”
She should accept Caleb’s invitation. He wasn’t an insincere man and wouldn’t have offered unless he truly wanted her to return with him. But Leah’s anger emboldened her. It was time to raise the question she’d been afraid to ask. “If thee wishes it, I’ll agree to an annulment. We haven’t consummated our marriage, and I won’t hold thee to the agreement thee made with my uncle. Since thee returned much sooner than originally planned, I’ll understand if thee wishes to put our marriage aside.”
Caleb took a few steps away from her, stared at the ground, and returned. “What about you? Will you return to your uncle’s farm?”
“I wasn’t wanted there. I’ll find a place to work, perhaps as a nurse to a widow, or as a housekeeper. I will make my way.”
Caleb stepped closer to Leah. “Do you want to end our marriage?”
Her tears flowed again as Leah considered the pain of leaving Caleb and his children. She shook her head. “No, but I don’t want to be pitied. I know I’m not pretty. I know I’m not what a man wants.”
“Why do you think that, Leah?”
Leah’s voice broke as she revealed her long-hidden sorrow. “No one has ever wanted me. My mother loved me, but even she knew I was too plain to be chosen as a bride.”
“Did she say that to you?”
“She didn’t have to. When other girls planned for marriage, my mother taught me how to keep bees. She knew I’d have to make my own way in the world.”
Caleb retrieved a handkerchief from his breast pocket. “Wipe your eyes, Leah.”
She took it from him and did as he instructed.
Caleb stood beside her until her sobs abated. “There’s a stream just beyond that rise,” he said. “Let’s go and sit awhile.”
“Why?”
“Because I have some things to say to you, and I don’t want to say them in the middle of the road.”
Here it comes, Leah thought as she trudged behind Caleb, her head hanging down like a withered tulip. My day of reckoning has finally arrived.
Caleb tied the horse to a branch, took the handkerchief from Leah, and wet it in the stream. “Sit down,” he said. “The bank is dry.”
Leah lowered herself to the leaf-covered slope and wiped her face on her sleeve.
“Here,” Caleb said, “let me clean your face.”
A gasp of surprise escaped Leah’s lips as he gently applied the cool, damp handkerchief to her cheeks. “Take a deep breath, and let it out.”
She did as he asked, but her breath caught on sobs.
“Again.” He sat beside her,
his arms resting on his knees.
She breathed deeply and looked at her surroundings. The autumn sun shone through scarlet-leaved maples, illuminating the bank with dappled light.
“You are quieter now,” Caleb said. “There’s nothing scares me more than an angry woman.”
Leah smiled in spite of her distress. “Thee has battled Confederate soldiers, but an angry woman scares thee?”
“Oh yes. You see, I don’t care what a Reb thinks of me, but I do care what you think of me.” Caleb watched her for a few seconds then ran his hand through his hair and turned to face her. “It’s true I didn’t have marriage in mind when I spoke to your uncle. But when he suggested it, I saw no reason to object.”
“Thee didn’t want a wife.”
“Not then.” Caleb must have seen the pain that flit through Leah’s heart, because he hastily added, “But I changed my mind.”
Leah’s breath eased. “Thee did? When?”
“The first time I saw you. I don’t know who told you that you were plain, Leah, but they lied.”
Leah’s eyes widened with disbelief. Everyone had remarked on her plain looks. Everyone.
“You have a lovely face,” Caleb said. “Deep brown eyes that twinkle with good humor and intelligence, and wide lips that are quick to smile. Your body puts me in mind of a young doe, eager to spring into action at the slightest sign of danger. You’re strong in both body and mind. A woman like you is equal to any task.”
How could it be true? Caleb actually thought her pretty.
“I walked into Reverend Harrison’s study that morning expecting to see a timid spinster. Instead I found a strikingly beautiful woman whose bravery matched my own.”
The ache beneath Leah’s heart subsided. “Why—why didn’t thee consummate our marriage?”
“I told you. It was my agreement with your uncle not to take advantage of you. But as you may recall, I recently requested a change to that arrangement.”
On the train, Leah recalled. He’d kissed her and asked permission to share the marriage bed. “I forgot,” Leah murmured.
“Forgot?” Caleb’s voice was ripe with disbelief. “You forgot?”
Leah smiled at his exasperated tone. “I mean, I didn’t forget thy kiss. But when I got so angry, I forgot thee had made that request.”
“I assume you’re still considering it,” Caleb said.
Leah nodded and smiled at her husband. Of course she’d take him as her husband. It was what she’d wanted from the day Uncle Abram had told her of her marriage. But her answer could wait until tonight. Leah rested her head on her knees, suddenly exhausted by her fluctuating emotions. Caleb’s words had dissolved her anger and sorrow. Now joyous hope began to grow in her heart.
“Many years ago,” Caleb said, “when arranged marriages were typical, the honeymoon was a time when the newly married couple would get to know one another. In a strange way, I think my convalescence in Washington was our honeymoon.”
“We certainly spent a lot of time together.”
“You were a wonderful nurse. If you hadn’t come, who knows what would have happened to me.”
“It was the juice from the radish leaves,” Leah said. “Plus the honey.”
“If you say so,” Caleb allowed. “But it was much more than your medicinals that made me well, Leah. It was you.”
Leah raised her eyebrows in question.
“You talked to me,” Caleb explained, “and sustained me. I was lonely, and you kept me company. I was fretful, and you eased my worry. Even if you don’t love me, you treat me in a very loving way. I am most fortunate to have you in my life.”
Tears formed in her eyes once again.
“My word, woman,” Caleb said as he passed the damp handkerchief to her. “What have I said to upset you?”
“Nothing,” Leah said between sniffles. “Nothing at all.” She sprang from her position, wrapped her arms around her husband’s neck, and kissed his mouth as the salty tears fell down her cheeks.
Caleb drew her closer and returned her kiss. “Being married to you is more than just a stroke of luck, Leah. The Lord blessed me when He arranged for you to be my wife. I’ve come to love you very much.”
Leah laid her head on his shoulder, enjoying the strength of his embrace. “I love thee, Caleb. Thank thee for choosing me.”
Caleb kissed her again. “If I weren’t already married to you, I’d propose.”
Leah kissed him. “If I weren’t already married, I’d accept.”
Caleb gently placed his hands on her cheeks and looked into her eyes. “Leah Wall, will you marry me? Will you give me more children and live with me until the Lord calls us home?”
Leah’s soul overflowed with joy. Her years of aching emptiness faded as Caleb’s words sank into her heart. “I’ll marry thee, Caleb Whitaker, and I’ll be a mother to thy children. All of them. I may not have loved thee when we married, but I do so love thee now.”
Epilogue
Caleb smiled down at Leah from the cherry tree. “Ready for another basket?”
Leah shielded her eyes from the April sun and looked up at her husband. “Send it down, and I’ll add it to the others.”
A basket tied to a rope descended from the branches. Leah untied the knot and set the basket on the ground. “That’s two bushels of cherries from this one tree.”
“And more to come,” Caleb said, climbing down the ladder. “It’s been a good year for cherries.” A bee flew lazily around Caleb’s head; he swatted it away.
“Don’t hurt my bee,” Leah scolded, reaching for his hand. “Thee wouldn’t have so many cherries if my bees hadn’t done their job.”
“Not to mention the honey I enjoy every morning on Delia’s biscuits.” Caleb laid a hand on Leah’s rounded abdomen. “How’s my son today?”
Leah covered his hand with hers. “Thy daughter is doing quite well. She’s pushing against my ribs with the strength of an ox.”
Caleb kissed her forehead. “No daughter would be so strong. It must be a boy.”
Leah wrapped her arms around his waist and nestled her head on his chest. “Thee doesn’t really care if it’s a girl, does thee?”
Caleb pulled her closer. “Of course not. But think of poor Stephen. Two sisters to boss him around hardly seems fair.” The baby pushed against Leah’s ribs with such force that Caleb felt it. “I see what you mean about the little ox,” he said. “Stay in your warm cocoon, little one,” he said to Leah’s stomach. “It’s not yet time to greet the world.”
Leah ran her hand through her husband’s dark hair. “I love thee.”
Caleb straightened and held Leah’s face in his calloused hands. “And I love you.” He kissed her brow. “I will love you until my dying day.” He kissed her cheek. “And I will kiss you until all my kisses have been used up.” He kissed her lips.
Leah’s heart soared as she sent up another prayer of gratitude, her fourth one that day. The Lord had made her wait, preparing her to be a wife and mother, but at last, the secret desires of her heart had been fulfilled.
After many years of writing and publishing in the nonfiction world of academia, CLAIRE SANDERS turned her energy, humor, and creativity toward the production of compelling romantic fiction. Claire lives in the greater Houston area with her daughter and two wellloved dogs. When she isn’t writing, you’ll find her cooking, gardening, and dreaming of places to travel.
NEW GARDEN’S
CONVERSION
by Susette Williams
Dedication
I can’t thank God enough for blessing me with such
a wonderful, supportive family, and for allowing me to
pursue the gifts He has given me. I also want to thank
my agent, Terry Burns, and Becky for giving me the
opportunity to work with Barbour. My copyeditor, Vicki,
was fabulous to work with. Special thanks to my friends
and family who offered input, the critique partners who
&nb
sp; helped along the way, and to you, the reader,
for continuing to support Christian authors.
May God bless each and every one of you.
Chapter 1
Present Day
Porter County, Indiana
Jaidon Taylor’s heart pounded in his chest as he briskly strode into the hospital. Concern coursed through his veins to his inner being. Lord, please don’t let him be dead.
The fluorescent lights brightened the ER waiting room but did nothing to lift the spirits of those within the four walls. A frail, elderly woman coughed violently. Jaidon tensed at the hacking sound she made. He glanced around the room, looking for a familiar face that could give him answers. Numerous family members and friends of D-Dog filled a third of the room.
Why would anyone shoot D-Dog? Could it have been a random act of violence? Or was it someone from the gang D-Dog ran with before? Jaidon tried to do all he could to keep things like this from happening. It was why he got involved with the Porter County Youth Center. He spotted his friend, Kacey Carpenter, the director from the youth center, heading toward him. “Is he alive?”
Kacey nodded. “Yes.” He gripped Jaidon’s shoulder reassuringly as he shook his hand. “Thanks for coming. He just came out of surgery. The doctor said D-Dog is going to be fine,” Kacey said. “It wasn’t as bad as the kids made it out to be. They saw all the blood and panicked.”
Before he could respond, D-Dog’s ex-girlfriend Tanesha ran up and threw her arms around Jaidon. Tears streamed down her cheeks. Her short, coarse curls brushed against his chin. “Mr. Taylor, I told D-Dog to stay away—I told him Bruno would kill him.”
Jaidon embraced the teen. “You need to stay away from Bruno, too.”
“I know, Mr. Taylor.” Tanesha sniffed. “But getting away from Bruno ain’t as easy as it seems.”
How could he console and guide the teenage girl? Jaidon wished they had more women working at the youth center. Unfortunately most women didn’t want to go into the area where the center was located. However, right now Tanesha and the other girls needed a woman to talk with to help them see that gangs and gang leaders like Bruno were a bad choice of friends. True friends didn’t ask you to go with them when they shot or robbed someone. That’s the kind of “friend” you could expect to find in a gang. He’d been trying to help teach the youth that Jesus would be their friend and go with them. He would guide them on their way and help them avoid temptation. He would also help them find peace and a life away from drugs and violence.
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