by Mia Carson
Elle was very pretty, taller and slimmer than me, with a head full of dark, luscious curls. She had been my best friend and roommate since eternity, but I never told her the James I had met at the party weeks earlier was the same James she knew as my stepbrother. She knew I had lost my virginity to him years ago and knew I still thought about him often. I felt that if I told her about the party, she would encourage us to get back together. Elle had been known to make lovers out of enemies, and I didn’t want her to set about trying to fix James and me.
I sat in the bathroom for a few more minutes, then got ready for class. The rest of the day went fine – lectures, tests, part-time work, catching up with Elle about her new date.
The next morning, I woke up with the same intense feeling of nausea. Elle came into the bathroom to sit by me.
“Have you had your period recently?” she asked after my stomach calmed down.
“Yes, umm….no?”
“What do you mean? Yes or no?” she asked, her voice slightly irritated.
“I mean, yes, I’ve had it, but it’s a little late this month, so, no, I’m still waiting for it to start. You know, with school and stress, it can be delayed.”
“Gosh, Sara, are you that naive?” she asked, looking at me intently.
I looked at her and she rubbed her belly and smiled at me. “Heck no. It’s not even possible. I’ve only had sex once in the past five years. That’s not possible.”
“For a graduate student, you sure are slow,” she said. “I’ll be right back.”
“What?” I asked, but she had already left the bathroom.
She returned with a small box and handed it to me. “Pee on that.”
“It’s a pregnancy test. I can’t be pregnant,” I said, but the realization that I could be pregnant began to dawn on me. I hadn’t had my period in weeks, and even though I had been safe the day I slept with James, we had used no protection.
“I’ll leave you for a minute. Let me know when the test beeps positive,” she said as she left the bathroom and shut the door behind her.
“Fuck,” I mumbled as I sat on the floor. “What are the odds that I’d get pregnant the first time I have sex in five years? And what are the odds it would be with my stepbrother, ex-stepbrother?”
I held the box for a few more minutes, dreading opening it. But I knew Elle was waiting outside, and if I didn’t pee on it myself, she would force me to do it. I opened the box and pulled out the stick. I cursed internally. I was such a fool! I closed my eyes and took a couple of breathes. There was no use wasting any more time. I had to take the test.
I peed on the stick and set it down for the test to process. I walked away from it. I wasn’t quite ready to see the result, which I already knew was going to be positive. The test beeped, and I reluctantly walked back to the stick. Positive flashed at me. Yes, I was as pregnant as can be.
The box came with two stick, and since I knew there was a potential for a false positive, I peed on the second stick. In seconds, the result flashed Positive. I stared at both sticks, my world crashing in on me.
The next few days passed in a daze. Nausea, exhaustion, loss of appetite, emotional swings, bloating – I had it all and some more. Regardless of all the discomforts that came with the pregnancy, I knew I wanted to keep the baby. The only thing I had yet to decide was whether to let the father of the baby know about the pregnancy or not.
So far, Elle had been encouraging and nonjudgmental. As we sat one evening, eating ice cream, our conversation switched to the baby.
“What would you do?” I asked her.
“You mean if I were pregnant?”
I nodded. She knew I was adamant about not revealing the identity of the father. I knew she could guess. She knew I had been out with James Brickstone a few weeks ago, but she was not the type of person to snoop around or poke her nose into my business.
“You need to do what you’re comfortable with,” she said, smiling at me.
Her words stayed with me the rest of the night, so the following morning, I found the business card James had given me and called him. He picked up at first ring.
“Sara?” he said before I said hello.
I didn’t ask him how he knew it was me. He either had my number memorized or he was good at guessing. Or maybe his billionaire status opened all doors for him. I wasn’t sure which it was, and frankly, I was more concerned with making sure he agreed to meet me.
“Can we meet?” I asked.
“Sure,” he said eagerly. “When?”
“Today,” I said, half-expecting him to tell me he had some other prior business engagement, but he didn’t.
“Anytime, anywhere, sis,” he said.
I winced at the word sis. I was pregnant with my stepbrother, ex-stepbrother’s, child. How much worse could life get?
We agreed to meet at Salaters, a new over-priced restaurant downtown at eight in the evening. “Of course,” he said. “Can’t wait to see you again.”
“Me too,” I lied. I wanted to see him, but I wasn’t in a hurry to tell him he was about to be a father.
That evening, I arrived at Salaters right before eight, our reservation time. I had refused the limousine James had offered me, not wanting to be indebted to him in any way. Besides, I wanted to get there before him so I could compose my words before he showed up.
“Good evening, madam. Welcome to Salaters.” A young woman standing at the door greeted me.
“Thank you.”
“May I take your coat?”
“Thanks,” I looked around as I handed her my red fall coat. The restaurant had a million lit candles and looked so romantic – a great place for an anniversary celebration. We walked toward another lady, who appeared to be the hostess. “Sara Smith,” I said, providing my name before I was asked.
“Sara Smith. You’re with James Brickstone?” she asked, reading the names on the tablet she held.
“Yes. I’m a little early. Mr. Brickstone should be here shortly,” I said.
“Of course, Miss Smith. Sorry to keep you waiting. I’ll seat you at Mr. Brickstone’s table right away,” she said, leading me toward a private room.
Of course James would have a table at one of the most prestigious restaurants in town. I wouldn’t be surprised if he owned the entire restaurant. I felt a pang of jealousy as I wondered how many women he’d met at his table.
The hostess opened a door that said “VIP Only” and lead me to a dining area I could only have imagined in my wildest dreams. So this is how the rich eat – a VIP dining room in a VIP restaurant. The room was dim, decorated with tons of candles, fancy crystals, and fresh flowers, and meant for a couple. It was clear the room was for romance, something that was not on my agenda that evening. James had it all wrong. Did he think I wanted another sex session with him?
Suddenly the large room felt claustrophobic, and I wanted to tell the waiter I could wait outside in the main restaurant until James arrived. I was quickly losing my nerve, and if I went back outside, I’d most likely bolt. There was no way I was going to stick around and tell James about his baby. What in the world did I expect him to do anyways? Give up his life of luxury for one girl stupid enough to get herself pregnant the first time she has sex in five years? How did I expect him to give up his VIP room in the VIP restaurant where I assumed he normally met with several women to hang out with me and a baby? It wasn’t going to happen, and I was probably selfish for trying to put him in that situation. I realized that being there was the wrong decision. I had to leave.
Before I could suggest going back to the non-VIP room, the waiter pulled out a chair for me at one of the corner tables. I reluctantly sat.
“I’ll take it from here.” James was behind me. I quickly looked at my watch. He was ten minutes early.
“Sure, Mr. Brickstone,” the waiter said as he quietly slipped away.
James reached over my shoulder to pull a jade rose from the vase on the table and handed it to me. I turned around to look into a pair of eyes so sexy I
felt an instant warmth spread through my body. This was not starting off right. He gave me a quick peck on the cheek.
“I hope you still like jade roses,” he said, smiling at me.
I nodded, lost for words, my cheeks hot from the warmth of his breathe. He remembered I loved jade roses. I glanced around quickly and realized the entire room was decorated with jade roses. He really had it all twisted. I looked at him and sighed. He looked good in a sports jacket that had certainly been tailored for him. His jeans hugged his hips, and the slight bulge at the crotch made my heart skip a beat. I guess the anxiety, the smell of his cologne, the wine I couldn’t have, and the atmosphere of the place was getting to me.
“James, thank you so much, but this is really too much,” I started to say as he pulled out the chair next to mine and sat. Since the tables were set up for intimacy, he was so close to me I could feel his body heat. As he tried to get comfortable in the chair, I could feel our legs rubbing together. I felt a spark of excitement. He didn’t apologize for getting too close to me, and I didn’t want him to either.
“What is?” he asked with a grin. “The flowers?”
“All this,” I said, waving my hands around the room.
“For my sister, the best will never be enough,” he laughed.
“Ex-sister,” I giggled.
“Whatever you say,” he smiled. “How have you been?” He extended a hand to hold mine. I let him. It was warm and soft and sensual.
The waiter reappeared with a bottle of wine and discreetly placed it on the table.
“Wine?” James asked, looking at my empty glass.
“Just water,” I said even though I would rather have had wine to steady my fraying nerves, but the thought of the alcohol harming the baby was enough to stop me from drinking.
“I see you never developed a head for alcohol,” he teased. When we were growing up, I always said I was one of those girls who would get drunk from sniffing of alcohol.
“Not really,” I replied, not wanting to reveal why I could only drink water.
“So, would you like to place your order?” he asked, motioning to the waiter, who was standing by discreetly.
“Yes, please. I’m starving,” I said. At least ordering and eating food would buy me some time.
The chef personally came and introduced himself, and we ended up sampling several different platters of delicious food that was not even on the menu, many of which I could never describe. James managed to make me forget momentarily why I had come to see him in the first place as we laughed, joked, and reconnected. Our conversation went from our parents, to old friends, to life in general. It turned out James and his mother had done okay after they left us, even though it took a lot for him to adjust to a new life of opulence. I was, of course, envious of him, but seeing how he had turned out, I couldn’t not be a happy for him.
Over dinner, his words were seductive, his voice was sexy, and he smelled even better leaning closer to me. He didn’t touch me, but his voice was so sexy he may as well have been making love to me. A tingle of excitement washed over me as we talked, causing my nipples to harden and strain against my dress. By the time we got to dessert, we were like old friends again. Five years might as well have never happened. When I ate the last morsel of my dessert, he had a grin on his face.
“What?” I asked as I wiped my lips vigorously, petrified that I had a smudge of Tiramisu on my face.
“I see you haven’t lost your appetite.”
“Oh yeah. Food’s still my weakness.” I grinned. He used to tease me about how much I could eat at one seating.
“Just food?” he said, leaning close to me.
“Just food,” I replied, giving him a nervous smile. And you, I wanted to add, but I couldn’t. I was already giddy from listening to him all night. I didn’t want to make a big fool of myself.
“I’m jealous,” he said, reaching out to hold my hands.
I almost retracted my hand but sheer stupidity stopped me. And curiosity too. I was doing it all wrong. This was the time to speak up and tell him what I was there for – he was going to be a father. But the words were caught in my throat. This was simply not the time to give him such news.
“What are you thinking?” he asked.
“Oh, nothing much. Just thinking how life changes.”
“Yes. Life’s a rollercoaster, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Who would have known that you and I would ever meet again?” He lowered his voice. “Ever get a chance to make love again?”
I blushed. I knew I should have left at that point, but instead of getting up and bidding him good bye and wishing him a good life, I let myself relax even more. His presence felt so good, wrong but good. I had to leave before I lost myself again.
“James….”
“Sara, I need to tell you something,” he said.
My heart dropped. I had just been making stupid assumptions and he was about to burst my bubble.
“I need to tell you something too,” I said without thinking. I wasn’t going to be outdone. Whatever he had to say, I had a counterattack for him.
“You first?” he said smiling.
“No, you go first,” I said, sitting back on the chair. I expected he was going to tell me he was back with Vera and couldn’t just see me anytime I wished even though we were ex-stepsiblings. If that were the case, there was no way in the world I was going to tell him about being pregnant. I would simply wish him good luck and go take care of my baby by myself.
“You sure you don’t want to go first?” he smiled.
“No, it’s okay,” I said. “I don’t mind.”
“Okay. I’ll go first then,” he said, smiling. He took my hands in his. I was lost for words as I hadn’t expected an intimate touch from him.
“Sara, I never truly apologized to you about the past.”
“It’s okay, James. It’s the past.”
“No, you know I like to make things right.”
“Yes,” I whispered.
“I’m so sorry I was a jerk back then. I was simply immature, and I freaked out after having sex with you.”
“And that was why you stopped talking to me?”
“It was immature on my part, and when I knew my mom was leaving your dad, it made things easier for me because I would never have to talk to you ever again.”
I was speechless for some time but finally asked him the question that had been foremost on my mind for the past five years. “Was I a bad lay or what?” It took all I had in me to keep a straight face.
“What the heck are you talking about?” he asked.
“You left me for Miranda Ball right after we slept together. Not only did you stop talking to me, your stepsister, you started dating the most popular girl in school the very next day, and then left town just a month later. How do you suppose I felt?” My voice was beginning to rise, and for the first time, I was glad he’d chosen a private room. I noticed that the waiter had slipped away discreetly.
“Sara, I was a fool. I liked you so much. I was so scared. To convince myself I didn’t want you any more than any other girl, I chose the most popular girl in school to get thoughts of you out of my head. But it didn’t work. No one could replace you then, and no would ever.”
“What are you saying?” I asked. I may be vulnerable, but I knew when I was being taking for a ride. James was taking me on wild spin.
“I’m saying I wanted you so badly it scared me. To save myself from what I imagined was a love I couldn’t have even if I wanted to, since we were siblings, I did what I thought would work. I got a girlfriend to keep me away from you.”
“Are you kidding?” I asked, unable to control the anger in my voice.
“No, I’m not, Sara. I love you so much, and knowing that I took your virginity but couldn’t be with you was too much to handle. You have to understand that boys do dumb things sometimes. I knew Miranda was wrong for me the first day I spoke with her, and not that it makes a difference, we never had sex. I couldn’t
bring myself to touch any other woman.”
“James, you don’t have to tell me all this. It’s really in the past.”
“No Sara, I do have to. It took a month for me to see I was doing it all wrong, and the night when I wanted to talk to you and explain what was going on, was the same night my mom told me she was leaving your dad. At that time, I decided it didn’t make any sense letting you know how I felt about you. You were already losing a stepmom and a stepbrother. I didn’t want you to lose a lover too.”
I sat there listening to him. His reasons seemed valid, but it was too late. I was now pregnant with his baby, and we were no longer eighteen.
“Say something please, Sara.”
“James, there’s really nothing to say. It’s a pity we didn’t get to have this conversation five years ago. It would have helped me adjust after you guys left. I thought I was the reason our parents divorced, that they knew we’d had sex and had decided to leave because of us.”
“No, Sara. Mom left because she wanted more glamor and glitz. It’s always been that way with her. I’m used it. It was never about you or your dad.”
I nodded, understanding. There was only one question on my mind: how did he feel about me now? He said he’d loved me five years ago, but time had passed and I couldn’t make any assumptions. Not that it mattered how he felt since I knew regardless his feelings, once he found out about the baby, if he found out about the baby, things would change.
I felt a hand on my thigh. I gasped; I had not been expecting him to reach for me, but I didn't stop him. I didn't feel like stopping him. In fact, it felt so good. He looked at me, like he was asking for permission, making sure I was fine with his advances. I responded by placing my palm over his hand and pushing his hand closer to my pussy. The room was dark and no one could have seen what was going on, even if someone else was in the room. Involuntarily, I spread my legs wider, allowing him to feel my warmth. He rubbed my inner thigh slowly and seductively. His fingers began a slow, gentle crawl upwards. He gasped as he reached the top of my thigh. I guess my not wearing underwear was a surprise he hadn’t been expecting.
“Naughty girl,” he said, smiling seductively.
