“What happened yesterday?” I waited to see how he would play this. Would he follow through on his threat? Or did he think I didn’t have the balls to call his bluff?
“You. The hospital.” Darrell danced around his threat.
“I remember going to the hospital to check on an employee who had been injured in a car accident. Is that what you’re referring to?” I kept my face devoid of any emotion.
“You know what I’m talking about.” Darrell rubbed the back of his neck, and I realized he wasn’t wearing the neck brace he had on yesterday. Stupid macho bullshit.
Julie did her best to sink into her chair, staying out of the fray.
“I’m not sure I’m following. How does yesterday factor into this discussion?”
“You threatened me!” He shouted in triumph, which seemed to cause a twinge of pain, and he grimaced. I hoped it hurt like hell.
I tapped my pen against the side of my computer. “Oh, right.” I waved the pen in his direction. “I’ve heard that rumor. Too bad it’s not true, or your lawyer would have a field day.”
“Are you calling me a liar?” Darrell still smiled, but it was weakening with each passing second.
“Yes, I am. Do you have any proof of this threat?” I made sure my body language implied I had proof of his.
Darrell remained quiet. His eyes wandered over to the paper resting on the arm of Julie’s chair. The moment of truth was almost here. It depended on which one of us would back down, since neither of us was entirely innocent.
I set out my cell phone I normally used to record conversations. I hadn’t taped yesterday’s confrontation with Darrell, but I hoped the editor wouldn’t call my bluff. “I never go anywhere without this. One never knows when you’ll need to remember the details. All the details. The sound quality on this gadget is astounding, really. Worth every penny.”
Julie let out a small gasp, horrified upon realizing Darrell had lied about everything.
Darrell glared at me. The anticipation was killing me. Would he out my relationship with Claire as well as their past? The seconds ticked by.
Darrell’s eyes roved from my phone to the paper.
“Take the deal and I’ll forget about everything. Refuse the deal and everyone will hear what’s on this.” I tapped my phone, leveling my gaze. “I’m assuming you’ll be looking for another editing job. There’s a job in Cheyenne. I could make a few calls if you’d like.”
Darrell slumped into his seat after snatching the paper off Julie’s chair.
“Great. Julie will escort you to your office and will help box up your personal belongings. Anything relating to the company, such as your rolodex or whatnot, will stay. Your e-mail has already been shut down.” I folded my hands on the desk. “I’m sorry it’s worked out this way, but I know you’ll land on your feet.” I wanted to say old man, but thought better of it.
When I was alone, I popped two more aspirin and chased them with cold, bitter coffee. Then I massaged the creases in my forehead, wishing the day was over and not just beginning.
Chiding myself, I buried my attention in reports. The shrill ring of my phone startled me.
“Cheyenne!” Claire’s indignant voice was loud enough that I was convinced everyone on all three floors heard.
“Not now. Not here.”
“Who do you think you are?”
It was the second time one of my employees had said that to me in the span of three hours.
“Your boss. Do I need to make another call to Cheyenne?” I didn’t feel good about the threat. However, Claire needed to learn her place. At least I tried convincing myself.
I could feel Claire’s wrath through the phone and then heard a click. Once again, I listened to the dial tone, feeling an odd sense of comfort.
My cell vibrated, and I read Claire’s text: We need to talk.
This was not the day to have a doozy of a hangover. I didn’t respond to the text. I felt the vibration again and read: Answer me!
I counted to ten before I calmly texted back that I could meet her at seven that evening. I had five hours before the meeting with Claire. Five hours to pull myself together, get rid of the throbbing headache and the constant urge to heave.
I closed my eyes, remembering my time in the Dominican the previous Thanksgiving. I could hear the lapping waves, feel the warmth of the sun on my skin, and smell the saltwater. I sucked in and slowly let the air seep out, letting go of all the negative feelings.
The phone rang. I ignored it, continuing the exercise my therapist had taught me.
I was back in the lounge chair, listening to a caw of a seagull. A boat on the horizon bobbled on the water.
The phone rang again, and I sensed I had to answer. Avery’s voice announced, “Cora’s on line one.”
I let another deep breath out and then said, “Two times in one day. It’s an honor.”
“Are you insane?”
“I’m starting to feel that way.”
“I saw the package you put together for Darrell. Who do you think you are?”
“No one of importance, apparently.”
“Oh, don’t play the pity card with me. You’re going soft, JJ. And what’s this I hear about you finding Darrell another job. What the fuck? We are a media company, not an employment agency. I have my eye on you. Don’t ever go behind my back again or Wendell will be calling you! And don’t forget about your meeting tonight. I e-mailed you a list of the AA groups in your area.”
The dial tone almost sounded like a seagull. I listened intently, but gave up. The daydream was gone.
* * *
I was not in the mood for manners. Instead of knocking on Claire’s door, I took the key from the fake rock and let myself in, like I usually did. The shit was about to hit the fan.
Claire was putting dishes away in the kitchen.
“Well, give it to me.” I removed my blazer and set it down on the granite countertop.
Claire closed the dishwasher and refused to turn around. “Do you know how far Cheyenne is from here?”
“One hour and forty-four minutes if he takes I-25, according to MapQuest. A little over two hours if he takes highway 85.”
Claire flipped around to face me. Tears glistened on her cheeks. “Impressive. What other parlor tricks do you have up your sleeve?”
“I’ve had a shitty day.” I put my hand up to silence the angry woman. “So I’m going to give it to you straight. When I was assigned to this job, I was instructed to fire Darrell when the time was right. I know you can’t see it, but he isn’t doing the paper any favors. Half of his staff hates him. Finds him dictatorial, bullheaded, and out of touch. The other half is too timid to voice their opinion. We have some great talent. Young talent. George is bursting with ideas, and I know he can turn everything around on his floor. And Darrell has been stifling them for the past couple of years—ever since he lost control of the paper. I don’t know if he was doing it intentionally or subconsciously, but he was sabotaging the paper.”
I sucked in some air, before continuing. “I had been ordered to give him the boot with very little compensation. I went against Cora and got Darrell the largest package possible, and had my ass chewed out about it by Cora earlier today.” I paused to see how Claire took the news, before plunging back into the heart of the matter. “When I found out about Ian, I tried to get Darrell to see the error of his ways, and at the same time I was trying to find him another job in case I couldn’t get him on board. No one in Colorado wants to work with him. We work at a paper. There are no secrets in this trade. The only paper I could convince to take him, that was close enough for Darrell to see Ian on the weekends, was Wyoming. It’s not part of Beale Media Corp, and the owner is a rich cowboy who has no desire to jump into the twenty-first century. The man uses it for his own political gain, but Darrell won’t be forced into using Twitter, Facebook, and all the other things he finds detestable. He’ll have to adhere to the guy’s pol
itical beliefs, but he should be used to that by now. That’s just part of the biz.”
She remained quiet, and I couldn’t gage how she was taking everything.
“Ever since you pleaded with me to protect Darrell I’ve put my ass on the line more than once. I tried getting him on board. I gave him credit for things he was adamantly opposed to. He couldn’t see the writing on the wall.” I sighed. “Going to the hospital yesterday was a mistake. I only went to plead with him, for your sake, to ease up a bit.”
She watched me wide-eyed. “For my sake?”
“Yes.”
“Did you tell him that?”
I was entering the danger zone.
“Did you?”
“Yes.”
“So, you’ve broken two promises to me.”
This hurt, but I was also relieved she didn’t ask me how Darrell took the news. Claire was the kindest person, but if she found out the threats he’d made in a weak moment, I didn’t think she would ever forgive him. And there was Ian to consider.
I wanted to get back on safer ground. “If I let Darrell stay, all of us will be out of a job in five months. I know he’s Ian’s father, but I can’t stand by and let him destroy a paper because he’s nursing a wounded ego. Darrell had to go. And then when he started telling everyone at the office I threatened to fire him, when in fact he tried to blackmail me, I was instructed by the CEO of the company to fire him.” I cursed myself for saying the word blackmail.
“Blackmail? With what?”
I waved her off. “Nothing for you to worry about,” I lied. “We both know Darrell is good at research.” I hoped she thought he found out some details about my past. “I believe in this paper, Claire, and I’m not about to walk away.”
“Careful, JJ, I can see your ego shining through.”
“That may be the case, but at least I know what I’m doing.”
“Do you?” Claire cocked her head and raised an eyebrow. “Because after yesterday at the hospital I don’t think you do.”
I stared at her.
“What about last night?”
“A minor blip … and I know someone has already informed Cora of that blip.”
Claire’s face flushed.
“Are we done here?” I scooped up my blazer. “I have a meeting to go to.”
“Work is never done.”
“Not that type of meeting.” I turned to go.
“What type of meeting?” Claire’s tone softened some.
“Personal and one that Cora insists I go to every day for the next ninety days. Have a good night. We can talk more tomorrow.”
“Wait.” Claire placed her hand on my shoulder. “I shouldn’t have called her. I’m sorry. I was just worried about you.”
“I’m curious. Did you ever stop to think that Darrell was lying about yesterday? Or did you automatically assume I was in the wrong because of the poor decisions I’ve made in the past?”
Claire let her hand fall from my shoulder slowly, like she was unsure if she wanted to break contact but was unable to leave it there.
I waited for Claire to say something. Anything. Or to slap me again. Instead, she walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs to her bedroom, closing the door firmly.
Chapter Fifteen
“You’re quitting?” I was surprised I was able to verbalize the question. Shock. I was in complete and total shock.
“I don’t want Ian to grow up without a father.”
“And this is the solution? To throw your career away and go to Wyoming?” I waved a hand in the air.
“My career. I’m talking about my son. Besides, I’m not moving to Cheyenne. I’ll be staying at my parents’ place in Fort Collins. The paper there has been trying to recruit me for years. It’s much closer, so Ian can still see his father more than twice a month. Even if Darrell and I met in the middle, it’s still two hours Ian has to be in the car. I don’t want my child to feel like luggage always being handed off. Besides, with our jobs, it’ll be impossible for both of us to leave the office on schedule every time.” Claire avoided looking at me while she spoke.
“I know you’re pissed at me for firing Darrell, but stop and think what you are doing. Don’t react. Think.” I placed my hands on her shoulders.
“Ha! Should I learn from your example?”
“What does that mean?”
“That night. That night you left me.”
“I left you?” I staggered back. “If I recall, you left me. But not before you told me you were planning to marry Andrew. And I was only going away for six months.”
“Six months? You didn’t come back for over twenty years!” She threw her arms up and let out an angry rush of air.
“Come back for what? You were planning on marrying Andrew.” My voice cracked as the anger flowed through each letter.
She waved it all away. “I never married Andrew!”
“But you planned to. It’s not like you sent me a letter or anything saying you called off the wedding and why.”
She sat down heavily on the side of my desk. “Andrew called it off.”
I collapsed into my chair. “What?”
“Andrew called off the wedding.”
“I know—”
Claire cut me off. “He called it off because he knew I didn’t love him and that I loved you. He told me to find you and to tell you.”
“Why—?”
Again she cut me off. “I wanted to. I tried to. I called your parents and asked when your flight was supposed to arrive. I planned on meeting you at the airport …”
I covered my face with both hands and spoke. “But I didn’t come home. I went to New York at the last second.”
I still hid my eyes with my hands, but I knew she was nodding her head solemnly.
“Fuck!” I slammed a fist down on my desk.
She sighed, and I could tell Claire was trying to hold back a sob. “Do you ever think that we were never meant to be? That all the signs are telling us to stop.”
I looked her in the eyes. “No. I don’t think that, and I never did.”
“I love you, but I have to think of my son. He adores his father. I know Cheyenne isn’t that far away, but for a child it’s as far as the moon. Besides, you keep warning me that the doors here may close come the new year. Fort Collins Gazette called me two days ago with the offer. I was going to turn it down, but now, I think it was a sign. It’s the third time they’ve offered me the position. You know what they say about the third time being the charm.” She started to laugh, but it died abruptly.
“What about us? How we talked about adopting? I make plenty. You could stay home. Like you always wanted.”
“And if Mile High closes?”
“Claire, I won’t be out of a job. I could be CEO of this company someday.”
“And then Ian would be in New York and would only see his father during the summer and on holidays.”
I bit my lower lip so I wouldn’t swear. “We could work it out. Maybe I could get Darrell a job in New York. They’ll be more opportunities.”
“JJ …”
“Is it because of the other night? It was just a blip. I plan on going to meetings. I’ll go every day of my life if you ask. All you have to do is ask. I’ll do anything for you.”
“It’s not just the other night. So much has happened over the years. Me with Ian. You and … There’s so much water under the bridge, and I’m not sure we can get past that.”
Claire looked away, and I could tell her mind was made up. I sat in my chair, dumbstruck.
Claire then held my gaze for several seconds. “I’ll have my official letter of resignation on your desk first thing tomorrow morning. It’s easier this way. Safer for Ian and me.”
With that, she left my office.
I covered my mouth with a shaky hand, fearful what I might say or do. The clock on the wall behind me ticked loudly, and each passing second felt like a lifetime
.
Safer?
Did she mean safer not to settle down with a former addict?
Reaching for the phone, I hit the first number on my speed dial.
“Hello?” Her voice was perky for someone who was usually dictatorial.
“I need—” A sob rendered me speechless.
I heard Cora on the other line, breathing. I held the phone with one hand and rubbed my forehead with the other.
Finally, she spoke. “What do you need, JJ? Tell me and I’ll do it.”
I sucked as much air as possible into my lungs so I could get the statement out. “Get me out of this fucking state before—” I couldn’t complete my thought since I didn’t know what I was capable of at the moment.
“Listen to me. I’m getting on the next flight to Denver. Promise me that you won’t do anything stupid.”
“Define stupid.”
“Go to your apartment and wait for me. Don’t go to work tomorrow. I’ll call Avery and take care of everything. Promise me you won’t do anything. Don’t drink. Don’t run away. Don’t disappear. Whatever pops into your fucking shit for brains, just don’t do it. Stay put.”
I remained mute and considered all the possibilities she had just provided. I could get into my car and start driving. I had enough money in my accounts to survive for a few years. Even more if I cashed in my 401(k). Alaska. The thought of endless Alaska brought a smile to my lips. No one would look for me in fucking Alaska! Who in their right mind would run away to Alaska?
“JJ!” The sharpness and desperation in Cora’s tone brought me back.
“Yes.”
“Yes, what?”
“I promise, Cora. I promise.”
“Before I go, can you tell me one thing?”
I nodded, knowing she would pick up on it somehow. She always did.
“Is it Claire?”
“Y-yes.” I forced back the tears by rubbing my eyes so hard I thought they would pop out.
“I’m sorry, sweetie. I’m on my way. Go home and get some rest if you can.”
Again I nodded my head numbly. I heard the click of the phone and knew Cora was going into action mode. Before heading to the airport she’d call Avery and take care of everything. Cora was excellent at taking care of things.
The Miracle Girl Page 16
