She didn’t reply. She had her body pressed against the door like I’d told her I had the Ebola virus. She was holding on to the handle like she wanted to pull it and jump out of the truck.
“He’ll be embarrassed that his daughter came to town and stayed in a hotel.”
She turned to me. I could feel her eyes burrowing into the side of my head. “My relationship with my father isn’t any of your business, Stephen.”
“Yes, it is, because even though he doesn’t talk to me, I still care about him.”
She cut her eyes at me. “You’re asking me about my father. You need to worry about your own family.”
I shook my head. I didn’t have any family issues. Now that I was rich, even the few members of my family who hadn’t liked me, loved me. “What are you talking about?”
“Pete. Why is he living like a beggar?”
I swallowed heavy emotions before answering. “Pete is not someone I can help.”
“You’re a multi-millionaire. Seems your money should be long enough to help just about anyone.”
I pulled onto the shoulder, stopped the truck, and turned to her. “Tamar, do you really think I wouldn’t help Pete if I could? Come on. This has gone far enough. What kind of monster do you think I am? You know I love my cousin.”
“So why is he living like that?”
“Did you see him?” I asked, avoiding her eyes.
“He was at Bethel. He went through the back door so he could avoid seeing you.”
I shook my head. There was no back entrance at Bethel. He was standing in the cold waiting for me to leave.
I dropped my head back. The only thing that hurt me more than the situation between me and Tamar was Pete’s condition. I considered what I would share about him since it was his business, but telling Tamar I was protecting someone’s privacy would further enrage her. I raised my head and looked in her direction. “He’s a drug addict. There’s nothing I can do to help him.”
“Housing would be a start.”
“I’ve done that. Multiple times. Paid for rehabs. I can’t reach him. And for the last few years, he won’t even take anything from me. He’s slipped away.”
I gripped the steering wheel. The stress of the day was coming down on me heavy. I was in my car with the only person in the world that I wanted to be with, but I was intimidated by her anger. She was scarier than a three hundred and fifty pound linebacker.
“When did the drugs start?”
“I don’t know. I thought when I was away at college, but I found out he got arrested for stealing in high school, so my grandmother thinks it went back to then. I mean, why else would he be stealing if it wasn’t for drugs?”
“I’m sorry to hear that.” She spoke softly. “Your grandmother was good to him.”
“Yeah, but my dad regrets not letting him come live with us. He probably needed a male role model.”
Tamar looked in my eyes like she wanted to reassure me that we’d done right by him. “He was always at your house. Your dad was good to him.”
I shrugged through my sense of failure. “You never know what pushes people over the edge. The older I get, the less I understand.”
I held her gaze as long as I could. She was the first to look away. We were quiet for a few moments when she spoke again. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed you hadn’t tried to help him.”
“You’re assuming a lot about me,” I said. Tamar’s eyes met mine again. They shimmered like polished black onyx in the low light of the vehicle. I willed her not to look away. “You’re beautiful, Tamar. I never expected you to be more beautiful than you were back then.”
She caught her bottom lip between her teeth and turned her head toward the window. I’d rendered her speechless. The first time for the day. She’d been holding her breath because she released it on a long wind before she turned back to me. Her expression was softer.
“Thank you.”
That was all she said. It was all that was needed.
I nodded and put the SUV in drive. The mood in the car changed. There wasn’t as much tension. Maybe if I gave her compliments for the next two days, I wouldn’t have to listen to her sharp tongue.
The truth was, I had no idea how the video got uploaded to YouTube. Tamar was right. No one had access to the house but my family. I didn’t use my webcam often, but I could accept that some electrical short in the house had caused the thing to come on. That was a stretch. But that still didn’t explain how the video got on the Internet. All I could think was some hacker took over my webcam and stole it. Things like that happened. Thinking it sounded crazy, I could never suggest it.
I glanced at the dashboard clock. It was almost six. The meet and greet at the high school began at seven p.m.
Tamar read my mind. “We better get going or we’ll be late. We’ll be the talk of Pine. Again.”
I cleared my throat and asked a question to deflect the attention away from the topic of the video. “What’s this interview you want from me?”
Tamar clasped her hands nervously. “My boss wants to do a full feature on you for February. You talking about Mrs. Right for you, your breakup with Debra McAllister, dating, and your stance on celibacy. Your future with the Giants.”
I chuckled. “Yeah, she wants to know all my business.”
“We’re a pretty small magazine, so it would be cool to have your story.”
Her eyes were on me again. I smiled a little, but she turned back to face the side window.
“Where do you live?” I asked.
“Atlanta.”
“How long have you been there?”
“Five years.”
She was a good distance from home. I’m sure that was intentional. “You like it?”
“It’s home now.”
“What did you do before you moved there?”
She shifted in her seat and reached into her bag for her phone. I watched her scroll through text messages. I didn’t think she was going to answer me and then she replied, “I was in South Africa.”
“No kidding?”
“Capetown. I had to go somewhere where no one cared about the Video Virgin.”
I took the hit, but I knew how to hold on to the ball. I whistled. “Wow! What did you do there?”
“I was on a writing fellowship. I wrote a novel.”
I stole a peripheral glance at her. “You have a book?”
She shook her head. “No, I sent it around to publishers and it got rejected like eight hundred times. It wasn’t that good. I gave up.”
“You shouldn’t have.”
I took my eyes off the road again. Her eyes connected solidly with mine. “Giving up is easy for me.”
I tightened my grip on the steering wheel. I hated to hear her say that. It had never been true before.
“I also taught creative writing to the older children in one of the villages.”
“That’s amazing.”
“The kids were great. So smart and eager to learn. It was an unforgettable experience.”
“You ever want to go back?”
“Not really. But I do want to visit other parts of Africa.”
“I’ve never been to Africa.”
“You’re black. Money isn’t an object. You should go.”
“Believe it or not, my schedule is like crazy during the off season.”
“You do a lot of community service work.”
“You know about that?”
“I’m a journalist. I’m interviewing you. I did my homework.”
I nodded. “I like to work with the kids. I want some one day.”
“Was Debra opposed to having children?”
I shook my head. “Yeah, as a matter of fact she was, but I didn’t know it until…”
“Until what?”
“Off the record?”
She frowned. “Why would it be off the record?”
I nodded. “I guess I bett
er not tell you.”
She rolled her neck. “Better not.”
We rode in silence for a while.
“I’ll do the interview.” I glanced over at her. “I don’t like to talk about my relationship with Debra, but I’m comfortable with you.”
“You shouldn’t be.” She sang the words like lyrics to a song.
“Why?”
“I have an ax to grind. Maybe I want to hurt you.”
“I don’t believe you’d hurt anyone on purpose.”
“I didn’t believe that about you either.”
“Tamar, what can I say to fix this?”
“I don’t think there’s anything you can say. The house wasn’t haunted. The shoemaker’s elves weren’t in town, so unless you can prove you didn’t do it, I’m inclined to believe you’re lying.”
“What motive did I have?”
She frowned liked I’d asked her a ridiculous question. “I don’t know. All I know is that millions of people saw me naked. Your back was conveniently to the camera, so your face was pretty much hidden and my words and whispers and moans that make my ears bleed now were shared with the world.”
I shook my head. “I don’t remember a time when you weren’t my friend, Tamar. I know we were a couple, but before that, you were everything. I’ve missed you. No one has replaced you.”
She cocked an eyebrow. “Debra McAllister looked like a good fill in for any woman.”
“I’ll say it like my dad, ‘Everythang shining ain’t gold.’” I smiled. She didn’t. “When I say I missed you, I mean our friendship. We started as friends, Tay.”
“Our friendship?” She snarled and snatched her head to the side. “So, I guess that means the sex wasn’t any good.”
I pulled off the road and slammed on the brakes again.
Tamar exploded. “Stop stopping!”
“You don’t have to be so nasty.”
“I don’t even want to be with you. You made me come here. You deserve every nasty thing I have to say!”
“Tamar, I’m trying to let you know how much you meant to me. How much I miss you.” I was determined to keep my tone calm, even if she was not. “Can you for one minute consider that I didn’t want to hurt you?”
“No. Because you ruined my life, Stephen. Everyone called me a whore, including my father. I went to three different colleges because I was discovered as the ‘Video Virgin’ and I had no peace. Every guy on campus wanted to go out with me. You can imagine why that was. Porn film companies emailed me and called me. Magazines like Playboy tried to get me to pose for them. My life was destroyed. I had to change my name.” She began to sob. “You got pats on the back and went on with your life while I was destroyed. I was destroyed because I loved you.”
I swallowed. I hadn’t known it was that bad for her.
“And you know what’s worse? I felt like I deserved it because my father told me to wait for marriage to have sex. I didn’t listen. God punished me.” She undid her seat belt and pulled her knees up to her chest. “And don’t you dare quote some Scripture at me. I don’t want to hear it.”
I extended a hand and she slapped it. I reached for it again. This time she didn’t resist. I squeezed. I held her hand for a long time while I watched tears fall down her face. “I’m sorry, Tay.”
She pulled her hand out of mine and wiped her eyes and chin. She spoke on a hitched sob. “For what now?”
I closed my eyes and pushed my head back into the seat. “All of it.”
Chapter 10
We passed the “Welcome to Pine” sign and Stephen pulled off the main road. I couldn’t imagine that he had some shortcut because none was needed. I wanted to ask him where he was going, but I was too tired to open my mouth. That last round of verbal assault had put both of us on the injured list. I decided to wait and see where we ended up.
We entered a wooded area. A thicket of trees flanked the road on both sides. We passed a sign that alerted us that we were on private property. Even though it was covered with snow, I could tell the road was paved. That was uncommon on the backroads of Pine. The only people who paved had money. Seconds later, a house came into view. A small mansion. His.
I sat up straighter and released a sigh. “It looks like I’m being kidnapped by a big black man.”
He chuckled. “It was a big black man? That’s a cliché if ever I heard one.” He paused. “Still the same smart mouth Tamar.” He pushed the garage door opener and pulled the car inside. “Trust me, sweetheart. You’re not being kidnapped.”
“Seems you trust the world. No gate. No security. Aren’t you afraid someone is going to try to kidnap you?”
“The wiring is underground. It’s some state of the art stuff that keeps me from having to put up a fence. I don’t want one. I like the beauty of the trees.”
“You always were country.”
He chuckled and opened his door. I did the same and climbed out.
“Hey, I was going to do that for you,” he fussed. “What kind of men have you been dating that don’t help a lady out of the car?”
I wasn’t taking that bait. “I need to use the restroom, Stephen. That’s the only reason I’m not screaming right now.”
He stepped closer and smiled teasingly. “I asked you what kind of men you were dating.”
Before I knew it, I slapped him across the face. Hard. I stepped back. I raised my hands to my mouth. I’d shocked myself. But how dare he tease me? I hadn’t been with a man since him. I didn’t date. He still didn’t understand.
Stephen stared at me for a while like he was processing what had happened. “I’m glad you didn’t punch me because you’re kind of strong to be so little.”
I dropped my hands. “I don’t like to be teased.”
“You come at everybody like that? I’m thinking you keep bail money.”
I shook my head. Laughed a little because I couldn’t help it. “No, just you lately.”
He cocked his head. “There’s a restroom through the mudroom to the right.”
I nodded and turned to enter the house.
He yelled behind me. “Got that element of surprise working for you, too.”
I entered the restroom and dropped the weight of my upper body on the counter.
What was wrong with me?
I used the toilet, washed my hands, but didn’t come out of the restroom right away. I was embarrassed. This was Stephen and he was used to my temper as a child, but now…we were grown folks and grownups didn’t hit other grownups. You didn’t put your hands on people.
“I shouldn’t be here. I should have let Eva fire me.”
I exited the restroom and spotted my suitcase and laptop bag in the hall.
“Why did you take my bags out of the truck?”
“You’re staying here tonight.”
I shook my head. “I most certainly am not.”
“You can’t stay at a hotel in Pine. I will not watch you do that to your father.”
“Who do you think you are? You don’t tell me what I will and won’t do.”
He shoved his hands into his pockets and stepped closer. “Tamar, there are some things in life that are right and some things that are wrong. Staying in a hotel in a town the size of Pine is wrong. If this place isn’t big enough for the two of us and you need me to leave my house tonight, I’ll do that. But I won’t let you disrespect your father that way. He’s a good man. He doesn’t deserve that from you.” He paused and took his hands out of his pockets. “Now you can slap me again if you need to, but it’s here or your dad’s. Your choice.”
I swallowed. I had to admit, the hotel idea was troubling for me. But I hadn’t – I couldn’t go back to that house yet. Not without some other kind of way to break the ice between me and my dad and I wanted to break the ice badly. I just didn’t know how. I’d let so many years come between us.
I sighed. “You’re right. I should have done something about talking to him. But
this all happened so fast. My boss gave me this assignment yesterday. There was no time. I couldn’t make myself call last night.”
Stephen nodded and I could see he was relieved. “Dinner is in the warming oven. You can have a seat. I’ll fix us some plates.”
“Let me get that slap off first,” I teased.
He smiled and a flash of light hit his perfect teeth. “You see I took my hands out of my pockets. I’ma fight you like you one of ‘Dem Dallas Cowboys the next time you pull that.”
I chuckled. “You’ll need to pray extra hard to win that fight.”
A mock pained expression came over his face. “Don’t be cruel. I hold my own and so does my team.”
“It’s not easy though, is it?” I teased some more.
Stephen was amused. His sense of humor hadn’t changed. We always had fun together. A quiet moment of our acknowledging that passed from his eyes to mine. I broke the stare by turning and doing a quick inspection of the room.
Football memorabilia was everywhere. From the Panthers where he’d begun his career and now the Giants. Trophies, cups, jerseys, hats, photographs, you name it and he had it displayed or framed and hanging somewhere on the walls around the perimeter of the room. Floor to ceiling windows filled the expansive center of the back wall of the adjoining family room. I stepped to the windows. Even with the thick layer of snow covering it, I could see a lake behind the house, barn, and a corral for horses.
“You can take the boy out of the country, but you can’t take the country out of the boy.”
“What’s wrong with the country?” He carried two plates to the table. I joined him.
“Nothing, I guess, but we always talked about getting out of rural Pennsylvania and from what I can see, whenever you’re not playing ball, you’re here.”
“I have a good life, Tamar, but I’m lonely.” His eyes held me captive. His words seeped into my soul. “Here reminds me of when I wasn’t.” He extended his hands across the table. “I say grace or are you too mad at God for that?”
I hesitated at first, but then slid my hands into his. They were strong and warm. I realized they felt like home.
I bowed my head. My heart skittered as I listened to him pray. He finished by thanking God for me being here.
The Winter Reunion Page 4
