by Fiona Wilde
Trent wasn't in the room when they arrived, but Megan was awake and smiled to see her sister. Her eyes were a little less puffy, Jill noted, and her color was better.
"Hi," Megan said, smiling and then winced as she jarred her arm.
"Oh, don't," Jill said, rushing over. "Let me help you." Taking hold of her sister, she helped move her into a more comfortable position.
"Thanks," said Megan. "You're the best. I'm so glad you're here. I remember seeing you last night, but it was kind of fuzzy. They put me on some pretty powerful painkillers but I refused them this morning. I think I'd rather be uncomfortable than loopy."
She stopped talking then and looked past Jill to where Chadwick was standing in the door.
"Ohmigod," said Megan quietly, looking at Jill. "I thought Trent was kidding but you really are here with Brad Chadwick. How in the world did you two make it here without killing each other?"
"She rode on the roof rack of my SUV," said Chadwick, laughing, and Megan blushed.
"I'm sorry," she said. "That was totally rude of me. I just never..."
"Yeah, yeah, I was the last person you thought you'd see in the company of your sister outside of Loggerheads." He smiled broadly.
"Well, if it's any consolation, all the preconceived notions I had of you as an ideological jerk have been blown out of the water," Megan laughed, extending her good hand to him. "It was so sweet of you to bring my sister up here. I can't begin to tell you how much I appreciate it."
"Your husband already told me," replied Chadwick, gently shaking her hand.
"Yeah, but he'd like you anyway. He's a fan."
Jill looked at her sister with surprise. "He is?"
"Yeah, believe it or not," said Megan. "Didn't I tell you that he read Brad's book after I finished it? He said it made sense." She winked at Jill. "Of course, I disagreed with just about all of it, so I guess that makes me and Trent the world's oddest couple."
"Oh, there are odder ones," Jill said under her breath.
"What?"
"Nothing," Jill replied, plumping the pillows behind her sister's head and glancing up at Chadwick, whose mouth twitched in a small smile.
"Ah, you're back." Trent came in carrying a bag of fast food. "How long did it take you guys to find a place to stay?"
"We found a room over at the Spruce Hotel," said Jill.
"Room?" Megan asked, looking at first Jill then Trent.
"There weren't many vacancies," Jill hastened. "We ended up having to bunk together."
Trent and Megan exchanged glances. "Oh," they both said together. For a moment both couples were quiet until Chadwick asked if there was a coffee shop in the hotel.
"Sure," said Trent. "I'll walk with you. This coffee they gave me at the joint up the road is cold." The men left and for a moment the two sisters sat in silence.
"Wow," said Megan.
"No, it's not what you think -" began Jill.
"Uh-huh," said Megan mockingly.
"No, really," Jill said weakly.
"God, Jill, do you think I'm stupid?" Megan asked. "I can see it all over you!"
"See what?" Jill asked, standing and walking to the window.
"That satisfied just-fucked look," Megan giggled. Jill opened her mouth to deny it but Megan cut her off. "And don't deny it either, sis. I don't think I've seen you looking this relaxed in years."
Jill went over and shut the door of the hospital room and then peeked around the curtain.
"Don't worry," Megan said. "The other bed's empty."
"Alright," Jill said, pulling up a chair. "Yes, something happened. But it's not like we've been an item. Until he brought me up here I thought I hated him. But now...." She stopped and put her face in her hands.
"Oh sis, what?" Megan asked gently.
"I don't know," said Jill. "He's so...so different, Megan."
Megan smiled. "Maybe different is what you need."
"Yeah, but he's way different. He's so conservative and..."
"There's more?" Jill's sibling pressed.
"Well, yeah." Jill sighed, trying to find the words. She so wanted to open up to her sister, to tell her all of what she'd been struggling with, but wasn't sure how. "He's so old-fashioned and kind of bossy and...oh geesh..." She put her hand over her mouth for a moment. When she spoke again her tone was low and rapid. "Oh, Meggie, I like it. I really do. I mean, does that make me sick to be so attracted to someone so..."
"....dominant?" asked Megan.
Jill sighed and nodded. "Yes," she whispered and Megan began to laugh.
Jill felt her face flush deep pink. "Oh, great, now you're laughing at me!"
"No, no, no," her sister said hastily. 'I'm not laughing at you. I'm just laughing because what you obviously see as some taboo need is perfectly normal, sister. What woman - even the harriest liberal feminist - doesn't secretly dream of being Maureen O'Hara to John Wayne? And here you are acting shocked because you found a guy like that who turns your crank? Relax, babe. Instead of beating yourself up you should be patting yourself on the back! They don't make a whole lot of men like that anymore."
Jill felt a sense of relief flood her being. "Oh thank god," she said. "I was so afraid you wouldn't understand.
Megan looked hurt. "Of course I do, doofus. I'm just like that. Do you think I'd be with Trent if he were some little milquetoast? The reason I'm so crazy about him is because he's not afraid to stand up to me when I need it. Trent seems easygoing, I know, but he made it pretty clear when we got together that he was going to wear the Daddy Pants. And of course, I made a big show of objecting because I thought I should, but then one day I was like, 'Why am I fighting this guy and risking the relationship? Because society tells me I should?' So I stopped and just kind of relaxed into it. As it turns out, our differences make us a perfect match. We're kind of like those mirror images, you know, the kind that look just alike but are reversed. But what happens when you put them together?"
Jill smiled. "They make a whole."
"Exactly," said Megan.
Jill gave her sister a hug, being careful not to hurt her. "Thanks," she said. "You have no idea how much you have helped me, Meggie."
"You're welcome," said Megan and laughed. "I'm glad you figured it out, even if it took me getting all banged up for you to finally figure it out."
Part II
Jill and Brad Chadwick stayed with Megan and Trent until mid-afternoon which was when Megan finally convinced her older sister that she stood an excellent chance to survive even if she wasn't there to plump her bed pillows or offer her food and drinks.
"It's a long drive back, Jill," said Chadwick. "And we have to allow extra time for the road conditions."
"Listen to the man," said Trent. "He's right."
Jill raised an eye at the comment, recalling what her sister had said about Trent's take-charge tendencies. She'd never noticed it before, but then she'd never seen Meg actively challenge him and since Meg, who told her everything, never complained about or mentioned conflict she realized the dynamic had only been an issue when Meg made it one.
The women exchanged hugs and the men handshakes before parting, and Jill promised to call as she walked out of the hospital room. Once outside the hospital, she hugged her coat tightly around her, but it afforded little protection. When Chadwick saw her shivering, he wrapped part of his overcoat around her and gave her a gentle kiss on the head. She looked up gratefully at him as they began walking across the lot to where he'd parked his vehicle.
A few flurries had coated the windshield and Jill helped scrape them off as Chadwick turned the Land Rover on so the defroster could melt the rest. The couple was just about to get back in the vehicle when they heard someone calling out.
"Hey!" the figure called, dodging piles of slush as he ran towards them. Jill looked at the thin bearded man as he approached, trying to figure out if he was someone she recognized. It wasn't.
"Hey," the guy said again as he reached them. "I saw the two of you this mornin
g at the Spruce Hotel. Aren't you those two from that cable show, the one everyone's talking about?"
"No," said Chadwick, helping Jill quickly inside the vehicle. Jill made it a point to keep her face averted from the stranger as he did so. "I think you're mistaking us for someone else."
"No, dude, I'm sure I'm not," the guy said. "You're Brad Chadwick and that's Jill Parmele, right? You're the two from Loggerheads!"
Chadwick made a move to the driver's side of the window but the man blocked him. "C'mon, man. Can't I even get an autograph? I love your books."
"No, because I'm not who you think I am," said Chadwick, angrily. He pushed past the stranger and walked to the driver's side door. "Now get out of my way. Please."
"Fine, whatever dude," the scraggly man said. "Whatever."
Chadwick climbed into the vehicle and guided it out of the parking lot, glancing into his rearview mirror. "Shit," he said.
"What?" asked Jill.
"I don't know," he replied. "I just didn't like the way that guy looked at us. I get the feeling he's trouble."
Jill looked into her side mirror. The man was still standing there, a smile on his face. "I think you may be right."
Part III
At the next stop, Brad Chadwick picked up sunglasses and ball caps for both of them. The trip had been so spur-of-the-moment that neither of them considered the ramifications of being spotted together in public. Their appearances at the hospital could be easily explained; Brad had taken Jill to see her sister. But if anyone recognized - or heard - them at the hotel, that could be more problematic. ANN had a strict policy prohibiting fraternization between onscreen personalities.
"It's my fault," said Chadwick. "I let my attraction to you get the better of me.
Jill glanced over at him. "You regret what happened?"
"No, no. I didn't mean that," he answered. "I regret not considering that we'd be recognized. Eventually we'll have to tell the network and get them to amend the policy. I just don't want news of our relationship to get back before we do. There's too many loose lips around that place. The tabloids would have a field day."
"Maybe he was just who he said he was," said Jill. "Just some fan who wanted an autograph."
"Maybe," said Chadwick, but he didn't sound convinced and Jill wasn't sure what to make of the situation. She wondered if they would amend the policy and decided that if Chadwick asked Shale he probably would. Chadwick was, after all, an ANN powerhouse and the number two conservative network had made it clear they'd pick him up should he ever desire a change of scenery. But Jill wasn't sure what would become of her if things went the other way. Her options were more limited. Taking the ANN job had made her less desirable to mainstream networks, where some commentators were still suggesting she'd sold out. And even the number two conservative one might not want to directly copy the Loggerheads format. Sure, she'd have a big contract buyout check, but what after that?
Jill decided not to think about it. She'd have to cross that bridge if she came to it. She felt Chadwick reach for her hand, and smiled at him. He smiled back.
"Did you catch what I said?" he asked.
"About what?" she replied.
"The 'r' word."
"Ah," she replied softly. "Yes, I caught that. You said 'relationship'. Is that what we have? And is that what you want?"
"We both have to want it," he said. "But I worry that it might be a little harder for you than for me."
"Why?" she asked.
"Because of what happened in that hotel room, before the sex. We need to talk about it, Jill, because you need to know. That wasn't foreplay." He looked at her, his face serious. "All that stuff I say in my books about the patriarchy - all the stuff you probably hate - it's me. I'm an old-fashioned man and in my family I'll be the leader. When I exchange wedding vows, the woman I marry will be expected to promise to 'obey.' And once she promises to do that, she risks finding herself over her knee if she 'forgets.' If you're going to be with me, you need to understand that, Jill. I think deep down you do, and this might even be what you want. But I worry a little that your conditioning may cause you to resist, even if you don't really want to."
Jill looked out the window at the passing scenery. Since their encounter in the hotel room, she had enjoyed warm and passionate thoughts about the sex. However, she had compartmentalized the spanking, tucking it away to sort through later. Now Chadwick was forcing her hand.
"What you say ---" she began, her voice catching. "There's truth to it, Brad. I've never been attracted to sensitive men. I always fantasized about a guy like you." She looked down, her face coloring. "A guy who wasn't afraid to spank me if I needed it. I always thought it meant I was a freak, and I've spent my whole adult life trying to 'cure' myself. It's what led me to feminism, and don't get me wrong - feminism has been good for me - but I think the expectations it sets for women have made it hard for women like me to find the kind of men they want."
"It seems to me that if feminism were about self-determination, it would support your right to choose what you want, even if means being a submissive woman."
"That's what Lois said," she replied.
"Lois? Your new assistant Lois? The one who's as old as Bill Shale?" They both laughed.
"Yeah," said Jill. "That Lois."
Chadwick grinned. "I knew there was a reason I liked that old broad."
Jill slugged him on the arm. "Stop it," she said, then crinkled her brow as she considered his words. "Do you think I'm submissive?"
"You tell me," he replied.
"No. Well maybe," she said. "There's so much I need to sort out, Brad, and part of it is really scary for me."
"Don't worry," he said. "I'm here to help you. And as long as I'm around you don't have to be scared of anything."
Chapter Eight
Part I
"There you are!" Lois shot Jill a slightly peeved look as she walked into the office. "We were supposed to go over those war protestor tapes this weekend for the Wednesday show. Remember? At my apartment. Over tea? Tea followed by a couple of stiff drinks?"
"Oh geesh." Jill put her briefcase down on the desk. "I am so sorry. I was upstate all weekend. My sister was in a wreck. I found out Friday after work and went up to see her. We just got back last night."
"In that case, you're excused," said Lois. "Is she OK?"
"Her arm's broken and her face looks like she went a couple of losing rounds with a prize fighter, but other than that, yes."
"Well thank God," said Lois. "I just wish I had known. I would have sent flowers."
"That's a good idea," said Jill. "I don't think they're letting her out until tomorrow. Could you please check with the florists and have something sent to her room? She's in 514 Bed One at Valley General in Alpine."
Lois jotted the information down. "Got it," she said. "What kind of flowers?"
"Something cheery," said Jill. "Sunflowers, if you can get them. She loves sunflowers."
"I'll call Daisy Mae Florists on Third Street. They have everything." Lois stood and walked back to her desk.
Jill sat down and began to go through her messages but found it hard to focus. She and Brad Chadwick had decided that the second week of their show was no time to reveal or even give anyone a clue as to their relationship. They'd play it cool at work and try to meet discreetly when they could, taking special care to wear disguises when they rendezvoused. They were both mature adults and allowed for the fact that things might not work out for them. If they did, they'd break the news to Shale at the end of the season. If not, no one would be the wiser.
Since there'd been no tabloid buzz about their trip, both Chadwick and Jill felt it was safe to assume the guy in the parking lot had probably just been a fan and not a member of the media. But still they'd debated whether to tell Shale about Chadwick's taking her to see her sister and he'd decided honesty would be the best policy, just in case. But the news would have to wait; Shale was at a conference and wouldn't be back until the middle of the week
.
"In the meantime, we shouldn't trust anyone but each other," Chadwick had advised before dropping her off at her house. "Not even our assistants."
Jill had wanted to respond that her assistant could be trusted, but thought the better of it. "You don't have to worry about me," she said.
Part II
The topic for the Monday night show was gun control and the guest was Calvin Pate, the resident of a small, liberal enclave notorious for passing progressive legislation designed to make a political statement. The latest decision by the board was to "set an example for peace" by having residents sign a pledge never to own guns. The signed pledge was laminated, put under glass on a small podium underneath the park's largest oak, which the council had named the Peace Tree a year earlier.
Then the burglaries began. They were small at first but quickly grew more frequent and violent. Residents began community watch programs, but the break-ins continued until they progressed to home invasions. Then one night, the burglars chose the wrong home. Although Pate had signed the pledge, the burglaries had prompted him to break the pledge without telling anyone. He'd bought a gun from a co-worker, and when the two thugs broke into his house, he pulled out the unregistered revolver and shot them both, leaving one paralyzed. The break-ins immediately ceased, but Pate's actions had become national news.
Jill was going over the details of the case when Lois came in with coffee. "Oh, this is going to be a tough one," said the older woman, placing a steaming latte on Jill's desk.
Jill sat back and sighed. She was an avid proponent of gun control, but it would be a hard to argue in favor of it when a self-professed liberal - under pressing circumstances - had turned to a gun for protection. Jill felt even worse when she saw the rap sheet of the two burglars. Assault. Attempted rape. Carjacking.
"Geesh," she told Lois. "These guys were dangerous."
There was a rap on the door and Lois stood and walked over. "Hold your horses," she said and then opened it. "Jill, it's Mr. Chadwick.
