by Nikki Paris
“Oh yeah?” Sienna smiled at me and ran her fingers through my hair.
“I’m gonna call her Screamer.”
Sienna burst out laughing, and I gripped her hips and play-nipped at her neck.
How long could I stay in this perfect bubble with the girl of my dreams? I eventually needed to tell her about my dad, but Sienna made me forget everything that hurt right now. I wanted to stay in the bubble a little longer.
15
Sienna
Ava drummed her fingers against the pretty marbled countertop in her massive kitchen. She watched me for a minute and then uncorked a fancy bottle of wine and pulled two glasses from a cabinet. She sighed and said, “Thanks for finally answering your phone!” Ava gave me a pointed look and then poured me a huge glass of wine.
“Sorry, Ava. I’ve had a lot going on lately.” Like fucking Evan until I can’t walk… Ugh. I’m the worst.
“You’ve had a lot going on? Don’t even get me started.” Ava headed into her living room, and I followed. “Oh my God, I’m so tired!” Ava collapsed onto her couch with a very un-Ava-like groan. Her pure white leather sectional was not the kind of couch you collapsed on, though. I knew for a fact that it cost more than I made in a year.
I delicately sat beside her, clutching my glass of expensive red wine. “Long week?” I asked and took a sip. My heart was pounding in my throat. I was going to tell her about Evan tonight and pray that she’d be understanding.
“Ridiculous, Si, and it’s still not over!” Ava sat up and said, “Oh, I almost forgot.” She walked toward her front door, hips swaying, and picked up a plastic shopping bag from her entryway table. “My mom was cleaning out my old room, and I told her to throw all my shit away, but she said some of it was yours.” Ava dropped the bag in my lap and picked up her glass of wine from the coffee table.
“Oh, wow. I didn’t realize I’d left anything behind.” I’d lived with Ava and her parents for a solid year after high school. Sometimes it felt like I’d never be able to repay their kindness. I opened the bag and pulled out a folder filled with guitar sheet music. Next, I pulled out the gorgeous navy blue dress that I bought for a party back in high school. “Oh my god, I thought I lost this!”
Ava glanced at the dress and shrugged, then her eyes widened with recognition, and she burst out laughing. “That’s the sexy blue dress that had every guy in our school drooling over you at that party junior year! I swear even Evan did a double take when you walked out of your house in that.” She set her wine down and covered her face with both hands, almost laughing too hard to speak. “I was so damn jealous that I stole the dress from you and hid it in the back of my closet!”
“Are you serious, Aves?” I gaped at her.
Ava was still laughing. “I’m a petty, jealous bitch!” She shrugged and pulled out her phone, not even attempting to apologize.
I’d saved up for months to afford that dress, while Ava’s parents bought her new clothes every other day. And I had gotten a lot of attention when I wore it. I felt like a rock star that night, then the dress disappeared. Ava had even helped me look for the damn thing!
Fuck. She got so damn much attention in high school, and she couldn’t let me have one night? Who was I kidding? She’d never “let” me have Evan, either.
Maybe it was a bad idea to tell her about him tonight. I glanced over at her while she scrolled through her phone, completely ignoring me.
Suddenly her eyes lit up, and she dropped her phone in her lap. “Oh my God, Si! I can’t believe I forgot to tell you! I ran into Rob the other day. Guess who’s back in town?” She leaned forward and grinned at me.
My stomach churned. She knew. Shit.
“Uh… who?” I asked, forcing my voice to stay steady.
“Evan!” Ava laughed and clapped her hands. “My baby is home! I can’t wait to see him!”
Her baby? What the hell? My palms were starting to sweat. The next words that came out of my mouth surprised me. “I know,” I said. I thought I was going to feign ignorance and back down from Ava like I usually did. But maybe I was about to brave.
Ava’s pretty face wrinkled in confusion. “What? How the hell did you know?”
My heart raced. This was it. I was going to tell her. “I ran into him while I was playing at a bar a couple of weeks ago—“
“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” Ava held out her hand to stop me. “You were playing at a bar?” Her big blue eyes were open wide, and her lips pressed into a thin angry line. Within a split second, her anger slipped away and was replaced by sadness. “You’re doing shows, and you didn’t tell me.” Her voice was soft. “Since when do you not tell me things?”
I froze. I thought Ava was going to get mad at me about Evan, but instead, she got sad about my shows and the state of our friendship. I hadn’t even meant to tell her about my shows yet. Was I the shit friend here?
I swallowed the lump in my throat. Maybe now wasn’t the best time to tell her about Evan. Maybe I needed to think of a better way to tell her — a way that could possibly keep our friendship intact.
I cleared my throat. “I, I wanted to build something on my own, Aves. I wanted to do the work without any help.”
“Right.” Ava nodded and stared down at her perfectly manicured nails. “Um, I guess I get it.” She glanced up at me and smiled. “It’s okay, Sienna. I get it.” Ava reached over and took one of my hands in hers. “Can I come and see you play, at least?”
I found myself smiling and nodding and giving her the details for my next show at the coffee shop.
After she entered them into her phone, she narrowed her eyes at me again, “And seriously, you saw Evan and didn’t tell me? What. The. Hell. Sienna.”
Well, fuck. I thought I’d dodged that bullet tonight.
16
Evan
“Hey, mom!” I called when I walked into my parents’ house.
“Sh!” Charlie appeared at the top of the stairs, shushing me. “Dad has a headache!”
“Sorry!” I mouthed and headed up the stairs to our parents’ bedroom. I looked through the open door to see my mom clearing away a breakfast tray, and my dad leaning against his pillows with his eyes closed.
He already looked weaker than when I arrived almost a month ago. His headaches were increasing, and his appetite dropping, so he’d lost a lot of weight.
My dad opened his eyes and said, “Son, I’m going to take a little nap, and then let’s give your Camaro a nice tune-up.”
I gave him a weak smile. “That sounds great, dad.” Two weeks ago, I would have held him to that promise. One week ago, I would have kindly tried to convince him that I didn’t have the energy for a tune-up session. Now, I could feel it in my bones that no amount of his stubbornness could get him downstairs and leaning over a car engine.
My dad closed his eyes, and I slipped out of the room, closing the door softly behind me. It was hard to look right at him. Looking at him and admitting that he was getting worse was like admitting that the doctors were right. I couldn’t do that yet. I couldn’t accept it.
Charlie still stood at the top of the stairs, looking half frozen. I rested my hand on her shoulder and asked, “How is everything?”
Charlie shrugged.
We’d taken my dad in for more scans last week, and we were still waiting for the results. His doctors were already convinced that his tumor was inoperable. This most recent scan was because they were concerned that the tumor was growing too quickly.
Charlie and I headed down the stairs and walked into the kitchen, where our mom was busy washing dishes. Her phone rang, and we all froze.
My mom’s tense shoulders were almost up to her ears as she turned off the water and slowly dried her hands. She picked up her phone with shaking hands and let out a sigh of relief. “It’s Bea,” she announced.
Charlie and I released the breaths we were holding. It wasn’t the hospital. It wasn’t more bad news… yet.
◆◆◆
Sienna’s text c
ame in eight hours later, as I was leaving work, and my heart sank even lower than it already was.
Sooo… Ava’s coming tonight. She was already beyond pissed that I didn’t tell her I was doing public shows. She’s been trying to talk me into it for years. So, strike one. Then, I haven’t answered her last few calls, so strike two. Finally, Rob told her that you’re back in town. I told her I’d seen you, and she landed at a 10.5 on her wrath scale. Strike three!
There was a pause, and then another text came in. I haven’t told her about us yet. I swear I’ll figure out what to say to her. Just give me a little time.
I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. I couldn’t deal with any bullshit tonight, and Ava was the queen of bullshit. I texted back. How about, “Evan fucked me into my headboard last weekend, then again in the shower. Then I rode him ‘til he came in the Camaro. We’re together now. Get over it.”
Sienna replied, That would go over so well… Are you mad?
Was I mad? A little bit. Sienna deserved a better best friend than Ava. Sienna needed to stand up for herself, and I fucking wanted her to fight for me. But, I, of all people, knew how convincing Ava could be. I knew that Ava’s main redeeming quality was how fiercely she loved people, and Sienna was her number one. It was hard to resist Ava’s mad love.
I couldn’t hold that against Sienna, could I? I wanted her more than anything, but I could be patient, as long as she chose me in the end. I replied, No, I’m not mad. I’ve waited this long for you. I can wait a little longer.
I went home to change and headed to Sienna’s show. The little coffee shop was packed. Sienna wasn’t on stage yet, but I spotted Ava’s golden blonde head right up at the front. I rolled my eyes and decided I should get it over with and say hello to her.
I made my way through the crowd, and Ava turned as soon as I reached her, almost like she could sense my presence. Her big blue eyes sparkled with sheer excitement, and she squealed and flung her arms around my neck. “Evan! Oh my God! Sienna told me you were coming, and it is so good to see you! It’s been way too long.” She planted a big kiss on my cheek right as Sienna walked out with her guitar.
Sienna’s eyes flickered with something that looked like jealousy. I pulled away from Ava and tried to catch Sienna’s eye, but she wouldn’t look at me. She didn’t think I was still into Ava, did she? There was no way…
Sienna addressed her little crowd. “Wow, I can’t believe there are so many people here! Thank you for coming!” She flashed them her gorgeous, easy smile, but her eyes were filled with wild nerves.
Ava leaned over and whispered to me, “I invited half of these people.” She smirked like I should be impressed that she invited all of these strangers to make Sienna nervous. Then she said, “Sienna’s so damn good! I’m so excited to hear her sing!”
I watched Ava for a second. Her tiny frame, beautiful features, and sweet voice made her seem like an angel, and the confident vibe around her could have fooled anyone. But Ava was insecure, and starved for attention. I finally spoke. “Yeah, Sienna is incredible. She can draw her own crowd, though. I don’t think she needs you to fill up her shows.”
Ava pouted at me. “Sienna is shy! I’m trying to help!”
Sienna wasn’t shy. She was reserved and thoughtful, and she just didn’t love crowds of people. There was a difference. “Okay, Ava.” I turned away from her to watch Sienna sing.
“Evan.” Ava’s hand was on my arm. “I know things ended badly between us back in high school, but I’m really hoping we can patch things up and at least be friends again.”
Her words almost seemed sincere, but I didn’t want to hear them. I wanted to hear Sienna sing. I gave Ava a dismissive nod and turned back to Sienna.
She started with Make You Feel My Love. I let her beautiful voice wash over me, and I felt my tense shoulders relaxing. The fist of grief and worry around my heart slowly started to loosen its grip. I watched her face and her intense gold-green eyes as she sang and adored every inch of her.
Then Ava leaned her head on my shoulder and jerked me out of my moment. She sighed and said, “I’ve missed you.”
I glanced down at Ava’s shiny blonde hair and stepped away from her. What the hell did she think she was doing?
When Sienna finished her set and stepped down from the stage, Ava grabbed her for the first hug, claiming her. “Ah! Sienna! You are incredible! Oh my God! My best friend is a fucking star! Ah!”
Sienna laughed and hugged Ava back. “I don’t know if I want to be a star, Aves. It’s too scary.”
Ava rolled her eyes. “Maybe at first.” She pulled out her phone. “Take a selfie with me, girl.”
Sienna narrowed her eyes. “Uh, okay, but don’t tag me in it.”
“I don’t know why you won’t let me tag you. I could get your followers to skyrocket over-night.”
“Exactly.” Sienna raised a single eyebrow at Ava and then smiled for the photo.
Sienna turned to me next with a shy smile. “Hey, Evan. Thanks for coming.”
I wanted to pull her into my arms and kiss her breathless in front of everyone, but she wanted to wait to tell Ava. She was worried about Ava’s feelings. I gave Sienna a quick, mostly platonic hug instead. “I’ll come for you every time, pal.” I grinned at her and hoped she caught my sexual reference. The way her cheeks turned slightly pink told me that she did.
Ava was staring at her phone, not paying any attention to us. Then she glanced up with a big, fake smile. “Let’s do dinner with the old gang! I know the perfect place!” She pulled her phone out again and started typing furiously. “I’ll call Rob, too.” She sank into an empty chair and held her phone up to her ear.
Sienna’s phone dinged with a notification, and then another and another. She frowned and pulled it from her back pocket. Anger flashed through her eyes. “Ava! What the hell?” She turned her phone to Ava, and I saw the photo they’d just taken. Ava had tagged Sienna, exactly like she’d asked her not to.
Ava rolled her eyes and mouthed, “You’re welcome.”
I raised both eyebrows at Sienna and gave her a pointed look.
She pressed her lips together in a tight line and shook her head at me. Was she going to take that shit from Ava?
17
Sienna
Ava looped her arm through his as we walked to the restaurant. He pulled away immediately, but it brought back so many painful memories of watching them together.
Was I crazy to think that Evan and I could ever have our moment? Maybe that was all the last couple of weeks had been— one single perfect moment. The thought that Evan could actually be mine was too good to be true.
Evan turned to look at me, his blue eyes pleading with me. What for? Did he want me to believe he didn’t have any feelings for Ava? Did he want me to tell her about our steamy sleepover and Camaro sex? What?
I bit my lip and looked away.
“Aw, you guys!” Ava laughed. “It is so good to have the old gang back together!” Rob was going to meet us at the restaurant — a trendy sushi place that Ava insisted on— so the old gang really would be back together.
Ava looped her arm through mine now and rested her head on my shoulder as we walked. “Um, and seriously, Si, you were amazing tonight! You should be playing on bigger stages, girl. I can help make that happen! I know a guy!”
I snorted. “Did you sleep with this guy?”
Ava rolled her eyes and glanced over at Evan. “Just once.” Her eyes lingered on his lips. He stared straight ahead.
I cleared my throat. “I’m good, Aves. I don’t like performing for tons of people. It’s too much right now.”
Ava laughed her perfect tinkling laugh. “But crowds and fans mean more money. You could make so much money, girl!”
My smile was tight. I was getting tired of Ava always trying to pressure me to “build my following.” And I was still pissed that she’d tagged me in the photo. I said, “I’m good, Aves.”
“Your apartment is shit, Sienna. And I
know you don’t like your job. Let me help you!”
Evan scoffed. “Ava, she said, ‘no.’ Let it go.”
Ava tossed her hair over her shoulder and let out her counterfeit tinkling laugh. Beauty blogger Ava Mills didn’t throw her head back and belly laugh. That was my best friend who did that, and tonight, she was clearly #AvaMillsOfficial.
“Evan,” Ava put her hand on his arm, and I saw his muscles tense. “I want to help.” She sighed and looped her arm through his again. “I’m sorry I was a bitch in high school. You deserved so much better.”
Evan pulled away. “We all did,” he said and glanced over at me.
#AvaMillsOfficial laughed again as we arrived at the restaurant and then said, “Okay, let me go tell Jaelyn that we’re here!” Ava strolled over to the entrance, hips swaying.
As soon as she was out of earshot, Evan turned to me. “Why the hell are you still friends with her?” He crossed his arms over his broad chest and furrowed his brow in anger.
I sighed and ran my hands through my hair. “I’ve been through everything with Ava! And yeah, she’s bossy and spoiled, but she’s been there for me when I had no one, Evan! Did you know I lived with her parents for my first year of college, too? They practically adopted me and supported me so I only had to worry about tuition costs!”
Evan nodded and rubbed his jaw. He still looked angry. “Okay, so it’s Ava’s parents that were there for you. They have you feeling like you need to hang on to the friendship with her.”
I did feel indebted to Ava’s parents. They were better to me than mine ever were, but Ava had so many great qualities, too. I shook my head. “Ava’s listened to me cry, encouraged my dreams, held my hair back while I puked… She’s, she’s my best friend. I’m not going to turn my back on her and throw that all away just because she got a little full of herself.”
Evan laughed. “That didn’t recently happen, Sienna.” Then he shook his head. “Look, I don’t like Ava, but I’m crazy about you, so I will deal with having to see her every once in a while if it means I can see you all the time.”
