“Ain’t gonna be no drama, T. I figured it’s the least I owed you since I left. Calm down. When you want me over?”
“Come now If you can. I don’t want you staying too late.” I said.
I heard Markus suck his teeth. “Why yo’ ass gotta be so damn rude. I’ll be over in a bit then, damn.” He hung up after that not leaving me much more to say.
I flopped down on my bed and buried my face in the pillow. I didn’t mean to come out like that to him but I was tired. I couldn’t help it. It felt like everything was just wearing on my bones and making me just want to sleep it all off. After a few minutes of laying in bed I got my ass up and decided to make myself look presentable. Even if I was mad at him it had been five years since I last saw Markus and I wanted to make sure I looked damn good. I went to the bathroom and fixed my hair a bit and changed out of my house clothes, putting on some nice fitting jeans and a shirt. About half past three I heard a knock on my door, I opened it and found Markus all cleaned up like he was about the go somewhere.
“Nigga where the hell you just came from, church?! Why you wearing a button up and shit?!” I exclaimed. I couldn’t really believe what I had seen.
“Shut up. I just came from court that’s why.” Markus barged into my apartment and made his way to the living room where he sat down on the couch.
“Oh yeah? What did they say?” I asked, sitting next to him.
“Not really supposed to say but basically we were just wrapping up my case. What happened five years ago was a mistake.” he said.
“What you mean a mistake?”
“I mean it was a mistake. I got sentenced because I looked like some dude that had committed a crime. The police got the wrong guy and they didn’t care to fix their mistake. Ever since I got locked up I’ve been defending my case and trying to get out. It hasn’t been easy at all man. It was like I had been talking to a damn brick wall this whole time. No one wanted to believe me and they just thought I was another fucked up kid from the streets. I mean, once they found out who my dad was they pretty much said that my fate was sealed.”
“So…you were innocent this whole time?” I was in disbelief.
Markus nodded. “Hell yeah. I ain’t do anything wrong. You were like my rock, T. All that time I spent with you pretty much kept me out of trouble. I left all that gangsta shit to my pops and let his ass deal with it. If my Moms hadn’t been a crackhead and lived a better life I would be staying with her. But i got stuck with Pops. At least that turned out ok ‘cause I got to be with you.” He put his hand over mine and gave it a tight squeeze.
And just like that, with that one simple touch, I was hooked all over again. I was glad that I had been right all this time. Markus was different then most kids on my block and Momma had been wrong. She’ll never admit it but once I would tell her she’d know she’d been wrong about Markus. He was a good kid, good enough to be my best friend, even with her strict rules.
“It hurt me so much to see you get put in that police car, Markus. You don’t even know. I had to deal with Momma telling me over and over that she was right and that you weren’t good enough to be my friend. I had to deal with the kids at school teasin’ me and talking shit about you, talking shit behind my back. I hated you for the longest time for what happened. It was like you weren’t here physically but you were around me all the time.”
“T, I really can’t say I’m sorry for the pain I caused you. I’m sorry won’t do nothin’ for you. I wish that I could take it all back, not just for you, but for me too. People are gonna look at me differently now that they see I have a “record.” They gonna see me as a stereotype and a good for nothing’ even though that ain’t what I am. I figured if you helped me so much back then that maybe you’d be able to help me get my life back on track now.” Markus said.
I sighed knowing that even though I wanted to deny him and not fall into his trap again that I was going to do it anyway. His warm eyes just brought me in and I couldn’t escape. “Ok, Markus. I’ll help you. But I ain’t here to play no games. I’ve got my own life now and it don’t revolve around you.”
“Thank you, T. I promise you wont regret it. You always got my back.” Before I knew it, I felt his soft full lips against mine. It was quick but I felt every bit of it. It didn’t seem to phase him at all. He had already got up off the couch and was heading towards the door. “I gotta go do something but Imma be back soon! I’ll text you ok?!”
I stared at the door as it closed and touched my lips. Just like that Markus had found his way back into my heart whether I wanted him to be or not.
***
The next day was my day off from school. I didn’t have any classes and I had a few hours to kill before I had to go to work. It was payday today, my check kicked into my bank early in the morning and I was ready to treat myself. I headed over to Amani’s place to get her so we could get our hair done. She normally didn’t like other people touching her hair but she always let Momma do it for her. We went over to the salon and looked through all the magazines Momma had sitting around to try and figure out a new style. Amani was still probably going to keep her braids but I wanted something different. I wasn’t sure if I should go longer or shorter.
“What you think? Like Should I go all Halle or more Beyonce? Like I normally just put it in a ponytail or something ‘cause I don’t got time in the mornin’ when I’m trying to catch the train and shit. But I do love my long hair.”
Amani looked over from her magazine. “I don’t know. I mean I think you would look good with anything. I was thinking bout’ taking my braids out and just relaxing my natural hair. Why don’t you leave your hair natural? That would look cute.”
“Uh, no it won’t.” I said. “My hair don’t got cute little curls. It’s just like this big afro and I don’t really like it. it ain’t my style.”
“Then just get it short for now and if you don’t like it just put in a new weave next week, duh. It ain’t that hard.”
“You right, you right. But you ain’t have to be rude about it!”
“Gurl, please. Get yo’ ass back there. Yo’ momma callin’ you. I’ll wait here.”
I tossed my magazine at her playfully and headed towards Momma’s chair. She looked like she was so done with her day already but once she saw me she perked up a little.
“How you doin’, baby girl? You don’t come in here that often.” she said.
“I know but I got paid today and I wanted to do something different. I was askin’ Amani if I should go shorter or longer but I couldn’t really decide. She said I should just go short and if I didn’t like it to just put in some new weave in two weeks.” I sat down in her chair and let her put the cape around me. She went to work right away separating my hair and finding the braid she sewed my last weave into.
“You know, I think you would look good in any style. Them girls be coming around here wantin’ short hair and I think it look cute. We can do it if you want.”
I thought for a moment and just decided to let Momma do whatever the hell she wanted with my hair. She always knew what was good for it anyway. It was quiet for a minute as she got to work but that didn’t last long.
“So what did that boy want?”
“Ma,” I rolled my eyes. “You know his name. Why you still treatin’ him like he a nobody? Markus was a good kid and he tryin’ to get his life back on track now. He even asked me to help him.”
“Tamina, I’m just tryin’ to look out for you. I don’t trust him. Even though he’s sayin’ he a good person do you really know?”
“I was his friend for years Ma. I think I know him well enough.” I argued.
“He could’ve changed while he was in there! You don’t know for sure.”
“That’s why I got to see what he’s about. It’s as simple as that. I wish you would just support me and let me do things on my own.”
That earned me a smack to the head with the comb. “I Do support you. I’ve supported your ass since the day you were bor
n. I just want to make sure you making the right decision.”
“I’m gonna make mistakes on my own and figure it all out. I’m already stressed out about this and you ain’t helpin’. I just want to get my hair done and talk to you and maybe have you give me some damn advice but you keep on being salty. I love you but I’m tired of you always puttin’ me down.”
I could tell she was trying her best not to beat the shit out of me but she had to realize that I was a grown woman now. I was prepared to make a bunch of mistakes and learn from them. I already knew that I was getting into trouble by still wanting to be with Markus or at least figure out what he was about now that he was out of jail. Momma didn’t say anything for a bit. She just kept working on my hair. But after a while I heard her say “You’re right.” Before she walked away to get god knows what. She probably didn’t really want to stay there and hear me talk back to her. Maybe she just wanted to say that and leave, letting me know that she wanted to drop the conversation entirely. I knew she was trying to do what was best for me but she kept driving me up the damn wall.
This whole thing with Markus was straining the relationship I had with her and I wasn’t sure if it was worth it all.
***
I had just settled into my couch after a long night at work. Working in some uptown bourgeois restaurant was a pain in the ass, especially when people got rude as hell and you couldn’t really do anything about it but the tips were at least decent. I ordered some Chinese food and put my feet up on my coffee table ready to watch my shows when I heard a knock on my door. Who the hell could be at my door at this hour? I was not about havin’ nobody come out and hang out and if it was some fool about to rob me they picked the wrong day to do it. I put the tv on mute and tiptoed to the door before I looked through the peephole.
“What the hell?” I opened the door and saw Markus there lookin’ like a damn lost little puppy. “What is you doin’ here?! Do you know what time it is?!”
“You ain’t get any of my texts? I’ve been texting you and tryin’ to call you since like 8.” he propped his arm up in my doorway, determined not to leave.
“My phone died when I was at work. I just put it to charge now in my room. What do you want? I ain’t in no mood for no games.”
“Good, I ain’t here to play no games. why you all salty and shit? what happened at work? Someone tried to mess with you?” Markus asked as he stepped into my apartment and made his way to the couch.
“Excuse you,” I rolled my eyes and shut the door after him. I wanted his ass out so I could relax and sleep. “And nothing happened at work. I’m just tired from being on my feet all day. It’s hard work tryin’ not to beat the shit out of people, be nice, fake a smile, and stand up all day and night.”
“C’mere then. I’ll massage your feet.” Markus patted the space beside him on the couch where I had been sitting a few minutes before.
“Wait, you fo’ real? You’d rub my feet?” I sat next to him and put my sore feet on his lap. instantly his hands got to work massaging up the soles and my heel. I was glad Amani and i had gotten mani/pedi’s earlier today. my feet were looking cute as fuck. It made me smile and feel damn good.
“So I decided Imma try and get my GED, you know since I couldn’t finish high school and shit. I was hoping you would help me study and stuff. You were always the smart one and now you in college so you extra smart.”
“I wouldn’t say all that but I guess I could help. It shouldn’t be that hard. I know they got books that you can practice stuff, like the SAT’s.” I told him.
“SAT’s? What’s that? Is that another test I gotta take?”
“If you wanna go to college it is. It might be harder than the GED, at least I would think it is. I never had to take the GED so I wouldn’t know. But they got practice books and classes for that too.”
“Ok, but I can’t do shit until i get the damn GED. I can barely get a job because everything requires a diploma and I ain’t got one. I need a job to get all this stuff done first. It’s a pain man.” He leaned back against the couch and sighed, looking up at the ceiling. I felt bad for him. he wanted to do a lot and at least try and make his life better but there was just so much holding him back.
I took his hand in mine and looked into his deep brown eyes. “You ain’t gonna start sellin’ or nothing are you?”
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t be pullin’ that shit on me. You know I ain’t never done it before and I ain’t about to start. That was all Pops. Imma do shit my way. I just need to figure out what that way is first.”
I couldn’t help but hug him tight. he was still the same Markus I knew five years ago. I felt his hand rub my lower back as he kissed the top of my head. “Your hair looks good. I ain’t used to you havin’ short hair but it look good.”
“Thank you, Markus.” I looked up at him and smiled. His eyes shifted down to my lips but only for a second. We were already so close but we were moving towards each other, closing the small gap between us. Our lips met again but we stayed connected much longer than the little peck he had given me the day before. Slowly our mouths moved together, our lips caressing each other and only small moans escaping both of us. I parted my lips and let his tongue slide in. He dominated my mouth and made me so weak I could barely take it. I gripped his bicep and pulled him close letting him cover my body with his. I laid back on the couch and let my legs fall open. Markus took his place between them and continued to kiss me. The heat around us rose and I felt like I just needed to take off all my clothes right then and there. Markus took his kisses down to my neck, adding a few bites wherever he wanted. I couldn’t help but let out even more moans and groans. I had no idea what this boy was doing to me but I loved every single minute of it.
Suddenly I heard my phone ringing from my bedroom. “Oh shit…who could that be?”
“ignore it. This is more important, T!”
“It could be my mom. And you know if I don’t pick up the first time she gonna keep callin’ over and over again. Just give me like a minute. It’s cool, don’t worry.” I pushed Markus off gently and he sucked his teeth at me.
“Man, you ridiculous. That call ain’t that important.”
I rolled my eyes as I headed towards my bedroom. “Calm down and stop being such a thirsty bitch.” I went to my bedside table and picked up my phone. I saw Dante’s name flash across the screen. “Oh shit…”
“Who’s Dante? You messin’ with someone else?”
I jumped up and turned around. I wasn’t expecting to see Markus standing behind me. I didn’t even hear him follow me. “I…it was just a one night stand..” For now.
“If it was a one night stand then why he callin’ you? You don’t normally keep in contact with one night stands.”
“It ain’t nothin’ to worry about. I handle my own business, ok? We were barely together for one day so that doesn’t automatically make me yours. I don’t need you being jealous or anything.”
“No one said I was jealous!” Markus yelled which scared me a little. I Stepped back putting some space between us. “I just don’t got time to deal with some other dude tryin’ to be all over you. I thought you were gonna be with me, hang with me, help me.”
“And I am! But I never said that I was just going to be with you right away. We’re not just gonna pick up where we left off. We’re different people now. Who knows if we even mesh together anymore. We gotta take it one step at a time!” I tried to explain but it looked like he wasn’t having it. Markus turned away from me and headed towards the door, slamming it behind him when he left. I was getting used to seeing his ass go now. It seemed to be a bad habit he was developing. I didn’t like how he just decided that I was his all over again. That wasn’t how I rolled with anybody. I was my own woman and if he was gonna keep actin’ like a fool, then I would treat him like one. I looked back at my phone and redialed Dante’s number.
“hello?”
***
I looked out the windshield at the rain that was gu
shing down in huge waterfalls. It was already past midnight and my body was tired from working and being with Dante all night. He was in the city again for some business and wanted to meet up with me again. I eagerly said yes. I was all about havin’ someone a bit more stable in my life who didn’t care to deal with drama. Maybe a relationship wasn’t what I needed after all. Maybe I just needed someone to have fun with. Dante seemed to be that guy. He took me to a fancy ass restaurant, then we walked around the city and even a park for a long time, just talking and chillin’ with each other. It was a good night up until we got back into the car and the rain came crashing down on us. Dante was already having a hard time seeing the road ahead of us. I rubbed the back of my neck and looked over at him.
"How you holding up?" I asked.
"I can't see a damn thing in this rain!" He squinted at the windshield turning the wipers up to the highest speed. But it still wasn't enough. Suddenly the car slowed to a stop. We both looked at each other, confused.
"What happened?!"
"I don’t got a clue. It just stopped! Fuck! This is the last thing we need!" Dante slammed his hand against the steering wheel in frustration.
"It’s cool. Just calm down. We’ll figure something out. You got like AAA or something right?" I asked.
"Yeah but there’s one problem. I haven’t had signal for awhile. the rain must be messing with the towers or something. What about you?"
I checked my phone and saw that it was at 1%. "I drained my battery but i've got like 1%. See if you can call them real quick It might let you." I handed the phone over to Dante and he punched in the number. Just as I heard Dante say “hello,” his expression changed and he stared at the phone. The screen on my phone was black, battery completely dead. "Fuck!"
URBAN: What A Thug Wants Page 8
