by Ali al-Muqri
He went on to clarify for us what was meant:
‘What the Prophet is telling us is that the groom should look at the woman’s private parts, her very private parts, for us to see if these parts arouse our desire and attract us to what God has sanctified. If this is the case then we trust in God and complete the wedding contract, but if she is not so, then we must withdraw, for God has chosen what is best for us.’
It looked like the camera had dipped even further. There was now a blurry image of what looked like a wooden stick – most likely a leg of the desk the sheikh was sitting at. The trembling white sheet also in shot was obviously his tunic, which hung down over his knees.
‘Our noble Prophet had the best of intentions for women. He said: But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance – [first] advise them; [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally], strike them. But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them.2 The term ‘ill conduct’ here means disobedience to the husband and saying bad things, not adultery, as some imagine, for which the punishment is more severe than a light beating. As God’s Prophet said: If a husband calls his wife to bed and she refuses and causes him to sleep in anger, the angels will curse her till morning.’3
His voice rose as he spoke these last words, but he quickly regained his usual, calm tone.
‘These are the morals of Islam. By being obedient to her husband, a woman wins his love and affection, and above all, she wins God’s approval.’
He paused and cleared his throat as though he were preparing to say something particularly important.
‘Likewise, Islam has given woman her sexual rights. The Prophet permitted one woman to ask for a divorce, after she told him that her husband had only “the fringe of a garment,” by which she meant his penis was as flaccid as a rag and did not become erect. Thus, according to the rules of Islam, married life should be filled with sexual satisfaction, with both partners fulfilling the needs of the other, without holding back. Husband and wife should lie naked together and caress one another. Our example is God’s Prophet, who said to someone who was ashamed at his spouse seeing his private parts: I see theirs and they see mine.4 So there is nothing to prohibit husband and wife from looking at each other’s private parts, from touching and caressing them to ignite each other’s passions for an intimate, romantic encounter.’
The lens had slipped even further and was now pointing directly at the lecturer’s belly and knees. His hand, which gripped his gown between his thighs, stiffly and excitedly, brought into sharp focus exactly what was going on.
‘God’s Prophet, peace be upon him, used to kiss his wives a lot, on any and all parts of their bodies. It is told that he used to kiss some of his women before rising to pray. The sayings of the Prophet confirm that he would suck the tongue of his wife, Aisha, and that he used to put his mouth on hers while she fed him meat.’
I don’t think I was the only one who was embarrassed, caught between watching the hand of the sheikh – our lecturer – as it maintained its stiff grip on what had expanded between his thighs, and writing down what I heard in my notebook. He spoke in a leisurely manner, as though deriving deep pleasure from the words themselves. His pace allowed me to write down every word he said, while a couple of girls filmed the lecture on their mobile phones.
‘Besides kissing and caressing, there is also what we call vulgar talk. This consists of spoken obscenities, uttered by the woman during sexual intercourse, in order to tease her husband and bend him to her desire, so that his passions are ignited and he responds similarly. It is said that the best of Arab women are those who show their affection for their husbands openly, and it is also said that the best of them grunt and snort during sexual intercourse. Islam permits intercourse in any position. A difference of opinion arose between the early Muslims who migrated from Mecca and the Prophet’s supporters in Medina. Like the Jews of Medina, the Ansar – the Prophet’s supporters – believed that a woman should be taken while lying on her side. But those who migrated to Medina from Mecca and belonged to the Quraysh – the Prophet’s tribe – enjoyed and took pleasure in several positions, lying down, from the front or from behind. When one of the Quraysh married a woman from the Ansar, he wanted to enjoy her bent over. As Umm Salama, mother of the believers and wife of the Prophet, may God be pleased with her, said, this is when the woman bends over on her knees. But the woman from the Ansar refused until she asked God’s Prophet, and he revealed God Almighty’s words: Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will.5’
The sheikh paused, although his hands continued to play with what was between his thighs.
With the exception of Umm Muhibb, who remained hunched over her writing and didn’t look up, most of the girls’ eyes were now glued to the screen. They only looked at their notebooks to jot down something they thought important, like the name of a writer related to the subject. Faten refused even to write down the important stuff and simply sat, transfixed, staring at the screen.
The sheikh cleared his throat, as though he’d suddenly remembered what he wanted to say. Or perhaps it was just the rustling of the piece of paper he now took from his pocket and began to read from.
‘After the book of Almighty God and the sayings and example of His Prophet, peace be upon him, there are many books on the subject of sex in Islam. Last week I read a book called “Sex in the Light of Islam” by Sheikh Abu Ahmad al-Maati. It was this book that gave me the idea to talk to you on the subject. Since I am speaking of sexual matters, I want to stress the author’s call for the freedom to enjoy all sexual positions so long as they meet the needs of both parties, and are enjoyed by them. The author mentions two positions which he cites from other books on the subject. I shall discuss them here, since they are beneficial both for enjoyment and in addressing sexual issues that many men and women face. The first is when the man lies on his back, bends his legs and opens them a little. The wife then mounts him like a horse. This is one of the positions desired by the woman, because it gives her freedom of movement in ways she finds stimulating, and brings her to a climax quickly, with no great effort required from the husband. When he is close to ejaculation he can flip her over and climb on top of her. As for the second position, this is useful if the man is quick to climax but the woman slow. He needs to engage in foreplay for longer, and cuddle her more, sucking on her lips and breasts, stroking her chest and buttocks. He kisses her neck and then slowly rubs her clitoris with his penis without penetrating her. When she is fully aroused and grips him tightly, he slips it in little by little until it is all the way in and then moves it vigorously inside her until her waters gush forth . . .’
I noticed the camera lens had paused. The frozen shot was explicit enough to be in a cultural film. Sheikha Umm al-Muhibb was no longer in her place. She might have left the room a good while ago for all I’d noticed. Most of the other students were on their way out of the room, but Faten remained in her seat, astonished. ‘What’s wrong with you?’ I asked her.
She looked at me and then got up. We were the last to leave the room.
‘There’ll be no cucumbers, aubergines or bananas left in the market today,’ Faten chuckled.
I pretended I didn’t know what she was getting at.
‘How many hungry pussies are going to suck on that fruit and veg without being satisfied . . .’ She added.
How did I not know what these girls got up to when I had Lula for a sister, I asked myself – but I didn’t want to say this out loud.
When I enquired about Sex in the Light of Islam at three separate bookshops close to the university, the booksellers were baffled. They had sold out of it just that day. I had to go to a bookshop further out of town to find a copy.
Even after she watched the mobile phone recording, Lula couldn’t bring herself to believe what had happened. I found it odd when she told me it was a fabrication to smear men of faith, even though there was no love lost between her and them. Perhaps this is why the s
tudents never told a soul, even their families. They knew no one would believe them. Even among the girls, it was a long time before anyone dared mention what happened that day. In fact, I got the impression that all the students – myself included – hadn’t dared to even think about it. It was as though it had never really happened.
A Personal Cassette Recording (3)
When ‘Abd al-Raqeeb used to practice preaching, up in his room on the roof, the subject that occupied him more than any other was loose women. On the rare occasions he digressed from this subject, it was usually to talk about a wife’s obedience to her husband. His voice could be heard loud and clear downstairs. No doubt he imagined himself ascending the pulpit of a large mosque and addressing his sermon to an enraptured audience. I can’t really explain what I’m feeling as I listen back to his recording.
‘Those loose women. Those women who do not stay at home as God has commanded them. Those women who flaunt their body’s charms as though a second age of ignorance had come. Yes, a second age of ignorance. They go out shopping with their faces uncovered, stinking of perfume, tempting men with their painted faces, swarming upon them like the devil. Those women who mock God’s law and the example of His Prophet. Where will they hide from God’s punishment? Where? Where will they hide? Where? They are heading for eternal damnation – in hell!’
He didn’t neglect to mention those faithful and compliant women who guard their chastity and obey their lord husbands. As he tested out the sound of his voice he’d often say the same things over and over again, so that I ended up unintentionally knowing most of it by heart.
‘Consider Almighty and Exalted God’s word in the Noble Quran. Is there anything more sacred than the word of God? [He says this in a loud and impassioned voice.]
‘He – Mighty and Majestic – says’ [lowering his voice] ‘in the Surah of Women: Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means.6 And in the Surah of the Cow, He – May He be exalted – says: men have a degree (of advantage) over them.7’
[Raising his voice again] ‘This is the word of God. God’s law says that the male has twice the share of the female. Clearly, clearly God has defined woman’s place . . . Islam preserves woman’s dignity and honour when it orders her to stay at home, obedient to her husband . . . Indeed, the Prophet, who did not speak from his own inclination but from revelation revealed, said . . . Listen to what he said . . . He said: Were I to command someone to prostrate himself before another, I would command the wife to prostrate herself before her husband.8 You see? The Prophet ordered woman to be obedient to her husband to the extent that he almost asked her to bow down before him. Those are the words of the Prophet, God’s beloved and the last of the Prophets, not the words of the government and its infidel, secular laws. This is God’s law, not the law of those drunken fornicators who spend the night in the arms of harlots and in the morning call for women’s liberation, for her to be able to leave the house whenever she pleases. They hide from people’s sight by night but they do not realise that the eye of God sees them, awake and never sleeping.’
Women became ‘Abd al-Raqeeb’s preoccupation. One of the earliest things I memorised was ‘Most women who enter the fires of hell do so because of their disobedience to their husband and their ingratitude towards his goodness.’ It was only later that we learnt that this wasn’t something ‘Abd al-Raqeeb had come up with himself, when once he began with: ‘God’s Prophet said—’9 Still, all these sermons never managed to erase the image of the old Raqeeb from my memory, when, after getting drunk on one of his quarts, he would encourage me to free myself from everything.
Time to listen to the song again.
Ask a sensible man for sensible answers
But who could keep his wits in the face of such beauty?
If I were to ask my heart
Tears would answer in its place.
In my chest there is only flesh and blood
Feeble now that youth has gone.
My heart weeps and I say: It’s over
In my chest it trembles and I say: Repent!
Lula was still the family’s main provider. I don’t know how we managed to get by before she started working. As well as paying for pretty much all the food, she would also pay for the khat my father used to chew. His salary was spent by the middle of the month. He showed his gratitude by never asking Lula about her comings and goings. When ‘Abd al-Raqeeb began to ask why she was getting home so late in the evenings and travelling abroard without a male guardian, my father said to him, ‘As long as I’m alive it’s no one else’s business. I’m her father.’
These words, which he often repeated, would come to take on a much deeper significance. When the surgeons who operated on his heart confirmed that Lula’s actions had saved him from certain death, he was not only grateful, he felt he owed her his life. She paid for him to be treated in Jordan, all at her own expense. In Sana’a three different doctors had told him that if he didn’t travel and have the operation within ten days the situation would become critical.
On the day he returned home he addressed us all solemnly: ‘Everyone be here after the sunset prayer. I have something I want to say to you.’
That afternoon we all stayed close to his bed, waiting anxiously to hear what he had to say. At the appointed time, he called each of us by name to make sure we were all present. Closing his eyes he said feebly: ‘My advice to you all ... My only advice to you . . . Listen ‘Abd al-Raqeeb . . . No one has the right to interfere in Lula’s business as long as I’m alive . . . And even when I’m gone no one has the right to interfere in her business . . . Her business is her own . . . None of you have the right to judge her . . . Have you all got that?’
Over the following months my father would often say that he was only alive thanks to the grace of God who gave him his daughter, Lula, so that she could save his life. I noticed a little smile on her lips every time he said this. Later, she would reply: ‘Everything is thanks to Him. Yes, His grace. By His grace.’ I used to think, and probably the others too, that she meant God, but after a while I discovered she meant something else. I noticed that every time she said this she would press the palm of her right hand between her thighs, over the spot to which the credit was due.
In my chest there is only flesh and blood
Feeble now that youth has gone.
My heart weeps and I say: It’s over
In my chest it trembles and I say: Repent!
We were expecting a definitive opinion from the university chancellor on the fatwas that Sheikh al-Marwi had issued in his lecture, but this is not what happened. The chancellor made do with a terse statement published in the university newspaper: ‘The time was inappropriate to issue such fatwas when students are approaching their exams at the end of the first semester, a time when they need to focus on their classes and revision, without such disruptions.’
The Student Activities Department had devised a weekly open day. Every Thursday the Department would invite a sheikh or some other religious authority from outside the university to give a lecture on whatever topic he thought appropriate.
‘Does the university chancellor agree with Sheikh Marwi’s fatwas when he says the timing was inappropriate? Does that mean they would have been acceptable if he’d issued them at any other time? And if he said the students need to focus on their classes and revision without disruption, does that mean these fatwas are merely a disruption, a fuss that will soon die down?’ The female students and lecturers continued to ask each other such questions without arriving at any answers. I had no idea if the same questions were being asked in the men’s section.
The chancellor’s fears that the sheikh’s pronouncements might prove disruptive for some students were well founded. With all the fuss, I couldn’t stop replaying a recording of his lecture.
A Mobile Phone Recording (Fatwas)
‘Some fathers are stuck in the
age of ignorance and need to acquaint themselves with Islam. They name their daughters Jameela, Fatina, Ghaniya . . . Provocative names that expose what God has veiled in woman. There is no God but God. This is the state of Islam at the end of time. We call her Jameela, Fatina – such decadence! It’s as though we were at a slave market, advertising this and that pretty slave girl.’
He continued to expound: ‘Such names go against the way of Islam and the way of God’s law. Only an infidel would give his daughter such a name. In a previous lecture I said that these names are the result of the Western cultural attack on our Islamic values – through television, soap operas, films . . . and now the internet. The newest weapon in the war on Islam is the Internet. Through the songs and dirty pictures they share on their mobile phones. Bluetooth. Yes, Bluetooth. The sincere Muslim, the true Muslim must protect his faith, his family and the greater Muslim family. But how?’
The sheikh gave his fatwa – his definitive answer: ‘This can only be done by destroying the phones equipped with Bluetooth, smashing the satellite dishes and internet devices. Computers are the idols of this age. We must smash them in the same way the first Muslims smashed the idols of the polytheists in the holy city of Mecca.’
The sheikh hadn’t failed to include in his pronouncements the very means by which the recording of his lecture was transmitted to others, Bluetooth.
Apparently, one of the students from the male section of the university had recorded the lecture on his mobile phone. Every time I went back to the recording, sent to Lula’s phone that same day, I found myself asking a number of questions. Not only had his opinions on women’s education left me with a whole load of questions, I became totally confused when I tried to reconcile them with my own convictions.
