by Mia Kayla
With a firmness in his gaze and a tip of my father's chin, he said, "It's only too late if you've given up."
I blinked up at him, feeling like I was six years old.
He leaned in and lifted my chin up with the lightness of his fingertip. "So, Angelica, have you given up?"
Chapter 32
The time on my car dashboard said 5:15. I was racing like my life depended on it, down the highway and through the streets to my destination—Allswell.
I parked in the first available spot and jetted out my car door, almost tripping in my four-inch work heels. I charged through the door and straight to the bar.
My chest heaved in and out, and I leaned on the counter for support. Super lucky for me, the first person that I ran into was none other than Kristy.
"Is Cade here?" I didn't have time to bullshit. My father's words had snapped me out of my fallen fog. I wasn't giving up on the love of my life without a hard fight.
She lifted her head for a brief second as she wiped up the bar and uttered the words that gutted me. "He's gone."
I ignored the way my heart clenched. It felt as though my breath had been cut off. "Do you know when he’ll be back?"
She continued to wipe the bar without peering up. "He's not. He packed his stuff and went to Toline to finalize things at his new restaurant."
My shoulders dropped, and I pressed one hand to my abdomen. "Texas." My voice was barely above a whisper as a hopelessness spread through me.
The silence loomed between us like a heavy mist.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, and when I opened them, Kristy was staring directly at me. It must have been something in my voice, or maybe she read the sadness in my features because she asked, "Do you love him?"
I wasn't in the mood for her cut downs or her sly remarks. Of all days, not today. But her demeanor was without her normal rough edges.
I pressed both hands to my chest and spoke with such conviction and strength in my voice. "I love him so much." Because I did, I do.
Her eyes tightened. "You done with what’s-his-face?"
My chin trembled, my body going limp against the bar. "I was never ever with him when Cade and I were together."
She cocked her head to one side as though to assess me, then said, "He's miserable. I've never seen him so fucking miserable. He left here like a sad lost puppy, and I know it's because of you." The rough tone in her voice was back, and her eyes narrowed.
Finally, I couldn’t help but ask the question that had been burning in me since I met her. "Why do you hate me so much? What did I ever do to you?"
She rolled her eyes as if it stated the obvious. "You're not good enough for him."
Her words were like a cold shot of water in my face.
"Well, that's not your decision to make," I snapped. My back stiffened, my game face on and guard already up.
"But it's true, you're not,” she went on casually. “Cade is a good guy wrapped in bad boy tattoos. He's got a heart of gold that you don't deserve, sweetheart." She shrugged. "Cade is used to saving people. Redemption of sorts for Candice. Do you know I used to date him for a hot second? It didn't last too long. But he saved me, and a lot of us that grew up in Kritell."
My face must’ve registered confusion because she began to fill in the blanks. "Most of his managing staff and some of his cooking staff are from back home. He told everyone if people were willing to relocate and wanted to get away from the hood, then he'd help them get jobs."
I didn't think my heart could swell any bigger for the man I loved, but it did.
"So, yeah,” She sucked in her cheeks, placed both palms against the bar and leaned in. “You're not good enough for him. But you're right, that's not up to me, is it?"
My voice hardened. "It's not."
She lifted an eyebrow, then jutted out her chin. "So, what are you still doing here, then?"
I blinked, a little shocked and a lot confused.
She huffed out a longsuffering sigh, then plucked out a small pad from her back pocket and scribbled down an address. "Get your ass moving," she said before pushing the piece of paper in my direction.
"Thank you." My voice was whisper soft, afraid the waterworks would start up again.
There was only one place I needed to be. And that was Toline.
After a crap load of money and booking a flight on the phone with the airlines, I landed in Toline, Texas with nothing other than my handbag, wallet, and phone. I inhaled the muggy scent of the humid air while my legs stuck to the leather seat of the cab.
When we passed by multiple bars, and the restaurants and high-end shops came closer in view, I knew we were close. My legs bounced with a jittery energy.
Then I saw it. I glanced at the paper in my hand, the one Kristy had slipped me. The address was on the door of the bar: Goodbar.
These men definitely had a theme going with their restaurants. Allswell, now Goodbar.
After I paid the cab driver and stepped out onto the sidewalk, I wiped my clammy hands on my shirt. I hoped that today, of all days, things would be in my favor.
I walked right in. Being a weeknight, the restaurant wasn't super packed, but still, a steady number of customers flowed in and out. Allswell was always busy, even during the weeknights. I had to believe that the grand opening hadn’t taken place yet.
The decor was the same as Allswell. Circular tables in the middle of the floor, outlined by booths on the side. The lighting, the decor, the colors were all the same. If I closed my eyes, I could picture myself in Rosendell, at his bar. If I squeezed them tighter, I could feel the light touch of Cade's warm hands around me, the whiff of his cologne, and feel the hard span of his body against mine.
But we weren't in Rosendell, and Cade was no longer mine.
I straightened and took the biggest and longest heart-pumping breath of my life, then approached the bar, my eyes immediately seeking him. The bar was busy. Every seat was taken, and some patrons even standing around to be served.
And then I saw him. I stopped mid-step as I just stared at him. Seeing him reminded me of the very first time we’d met.
God, was he beautiful. Simply breathtaking. It was the hard lines of his face and the darkness in his hair, the artistic line of every tattoo that had significance. He was beautiful, and, shit, I was going to win him back.
His head jerked up just as I took another step toward the bar. Then his eyes narrowed, deep steely gray met my brown ones. The emotions on his face flipped like the pages of a book—first surprise, then shock, then curiosity.
Actions over words, I silently told myself.
I walked toward him at a nervously slow pace, strong willed determination straightening my spine. I wished I could rewind to when he had jumped over the counter at Allswell that very first night we’d met, that very first time he’d asked me to dance.
With all of my heart, that’s all I wanted—just to be close to him.
He leaned over the bar, and his eyebrows drew together in a cautious expression. “What are you doing here?”
I had to yell above the noise, above the music. “I need to talk to you.” I bit my shaky bottom lip. “Please.”
He scoured my face, seeming hesitant at first, then he raised a finger and pointed to the edge of the bar, where I walked around to meet him.
Cade stepped into me, his body overwhelmingly powerful and looming over my small frame. "What do you want?" His tone was tired, resigned.
I peered up into his eyes, and my initial instinct was to grab him, pull him down and kiss him with reckless abandon.
My mind was a jumbled mess like scattered Chinese characters, but I wanted him to hear me out. All I knew was that I wanted to start over, so I recited the words he’d said to me that first night. "Let's dance." That's all I had.
He studied me thoughtfully for a moment. "Angel, why are you here?"
I shook my head as full-blown emotions took over. "No," I said, wanting a do over. "This is where I start over. I say,
'Let's dance,' and you say, 'Okay'. Or you say, 'Let's dance,' and I say, 'Okay,' instead of 'I have a boyfriend.’ I don't have a boyfriend, not anymore because he left me. Because I deserved it." I was talking about him, not Roland, as my words spilled out like a rapid fire. "Because I was stupid and couldn't stand up for myself because I was afraid, but I'm not afraid anymore. My parents know. They want to meet you. My father, especially. My mother has accepted this and ..."
His hands gripped mine and squeezed, stopping me mid-sentence. "Let’s talk about this later."
“No, we’re talking about this now.” My voice heightened with hysteria. “Here. Or in the kitchen. But I’m not leaving until you hear what I have to say.”
His face pinched, and his gaze dropped to the ground. “What makes now so different? Is it because I left? You only found the courage after I upped and left.” His words flew out of his mouth with a bitter edge. “I figured it out. You just couldn’t introduce the tattooed bartender to your parents when you had mister suit and tie at home. Tell the truth, Angel.”
“That’s not it!” I raised my voice, causing the people sitting on the stools to turn in my direction. “I’m sorry,” I said, placing both hands on my chest. “I was afraid of my father’s health. Afraid to cause a scene at that moment at Allswell. Just scared and I’m sorry. So, so sorry.”
Our eyes locked in a silent tug-of-war, me wanting him to forgive me, and his indecision that was causing both of us such anguish.
He let out one long shaky breath, and his gaze dropped to the ground. “I can’t right now, Angel. Let’s talk about this later.”
And then my heart cracked, grief and despair shredding my insides because every single part of me knew I was going to lose him. I pushed back the tears and the emotions coursing through me. If I left here without him today, it would be for good. Final.
And I couldn't have that.
Every single customer in the bar and the surrounding tables was staring at me—the crazy person yelling in the bar and pouring out her emotions like she was on some soap opera.
Go big or go home.
I lifted my chin as the worst ever idea popped into my head, and I decided to do something so unlike me.
I hopped on the bar, butt first, then stood. I looked like a fool, felt like a fool, and I was a fool—a fool in love.
Everyone’s eyes were on me, and this whole thing felt like a really bad rom com, super cheesy, but desperation rocked my core.
"I love you," I shouted, fixing my stare directly on Cade. "So much. I've been in love before, but never like this. Never like this because it wasn't you." Both of my hands flew to my chest. Then I directed my attention to everyone in the room. "I love that man, tattoos and all." I pointed to Cade, then cupped both hands to my chest. "I wasn't able to tell my family before because I was scared." Adrenaline and fear shook my body. The fear of losing him, but I pushed through, courage straightening my spine. Because I needed to win him back.
My eyes met his, glossed over with tears. "But they know now, and I want the whole world to know that I love Cade Ryder. I want to shout it from the rooftops. I. Love. Cade. Ryder!" I yelled, looking and sounding crazy, my arms spread wide.
I felt vulnerable and open as everyone witnessed my declaration. “It's not only his good looks but his unbelievable good heart. I love him so much it hurts when I'm not with him. He's all I think about, all I dream about, all I want." But I swallowed back a choked sob. "But I messed things up, and ... and I just hope to God I'm not too late. Am I ... am I too late?"
My voice quivered, and I stood in front of him, on top of the bar, both hands on my chest, waiting for his response. He held my world in his one answer. The answer that could unlock my happiness.
I could read the swirl of emotions running rampant through his irises. Irises that were a deep, steely hypnotic gray.
"Take her back," Someone said, breaking the silence. Then the chants of 'take her back' began.
Mere seconds staring into his eyes seemed like a lifetime.
"Fuck it." Suddenly a broad-shouldered male sitting at the bar stood up. "I'll take you, beautiful lady."
That seemed to break Cade from his trance because he stepped forward. "Sorry, sir, you can't." His eyes met mine, gray, powerful and unwavering. Then he extended his hand. "Because she's already taken. She's mine."
Tears nearly burst through when I peered down to see the devotion, the longing, but mostly love through his eyes.
My hands met his, and I bent down to get off the bar, but not before he swooped me up in his arms.
The crowd’s cheers became a deafening roar around us, and he smiled, the crooked smile, the smile I loved.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and snuggled closer. "I'm sorry. So sorry."
The heart rending tenderness of his gaze was overwhelming. "No more ‘I'm sorries’ in this relationship. Only ‘I love yous’ from now on," he whispered. The nearness of him made my head spin. "He may have been your first love..." His burning eyes held me still. "But I'm your last. Forever love."
I angled closer, pecked his lips, and whispered, "Forever and ever, amen."
Then he met my lips in the most soul crushing, body melting, panty dropping kiss—a kiss that scorched my insides and one that touched the inner most part of my heart.
Our kiss deepened, in front of the crowd. When he pulled back, his breathing was labored, so was mine.
He motioned with one hand and lifted his head to someone behind me. "A round for everyone, on the house. I'll be right back."
Hoots and hollers echoed throughout the room.
He deepened his kiss and bit my bottom lip. "I've missed you," he said, carrying me away from the noise, the crowd, the chaos, and through the doors that led to the back. "I'm about to show you how much."
My stomach did non-stop flips, but that was nothing to the pounding of my happy, love-filled heart because he was mine.
Epilogue
It had been two weeks since Cade and I had reunited in his office at Goodbar. We had texted and talked on the phone constantly. He said he'd been busy with work, setting up in Toline, and a big part of me believed I was repeating my past.
But just when those thoughts filtered through my mind, I 'd take a step back and remind myself that Cade was not Roland and that I was not the same person I used to be.
I would no longer take shit. So, I took the time to get all my work in order, to make sure all my tenants were happy, their rents were collected, and everything was fixed at the properties. I also took the two weeks to put all my Roland memories into boxes.
I was pushing boxes into my closet when I heard a knock on the door. I frowned. The doorman didn't call. I wasn't expecting anyone.
My feet padded across the bedroom carpet and onto the hardwood floors that led to the front door.
I glanced through the peephole, but someone was covering it.
"Hello, who's there?"
"Are you going to make me stand here all day, or are you going to come and open this door, so I can kiss you?"
Cade.
I pulled open the door and jumped into his arms, squealing with delight. His wide eyes showed me I had caught him by surprise, and then I saw that he was carrying a bag of groceries in one hand. But he easily held that bag tight while also anchoring me against his hip, cradling my butt as he carried me inside my apartment.
My hands were in his hair, my chest against his, my legs wrapped around his waist and my lips were connected to his.
"I missed you," I said, with a flick of my tongue against his lips.
"I can tell," he chuckled.
He dropped the brown paper bag on the floor. "I've missed you, too."
And all of a sudden, it was like fire melting ice.
The air blasting in the room was no comparison to the heat coursing through my body.
"Show me how much you've missed me," I whispered against his lips, anchoring my body against him.
He pressed his hardness against my
center, and I gasped at the contact, at the strength of him, at the sizzle of spice between us. He pushed us against the wall, his strong thighs holding me up. With one hand, he pulled down my shorts and slipped a finger inside me. His lips trailed a path of blazing kisses from my ear down to my neck, his finger working its magic, making me slick.
I missed this man, my man. Oh God, how I missed him.
"Is this how you want me to show you?"
I moaned from the sensual friction he was creating and the burning desire inside me heightened. "Yes." My voice was hoarse, and my body was horny and hungry for him.
I pushed at his chest, and he flinched, which stopped me. I assessed his face and stepped back, but in the next beat, he said, "Come here." He unbuttoned his jeans, shoved them down to the floor, followed by his boxers, and grabbed my waist.
Our eyes locked and that was all it took for him to anchor me against the wall and enter me all at once.
My eyes fluttered shut at the impact, at the fullness of him, at the heat of him inside of me. He gripped my hips and rammed into me, his lips falling to the crook of my neck. All I could hear was the panting of our breaths, all I could feel was the sensation of his body against mine, all I could smell was the aroma of our heat.
His eyes were at half mast, his movements erratic. He wasn't going to last long, but neither was I.
I loved the feel of him inside of me, balls deep inside of me, ravenous as though he couldn't get enough.
"You feel so good, Angel," he said, pounding into me with fiery fervor like I was his first breath and his last.
I shifted until he hit that certain spot and my moans heightened. His head dropped to the crook of my neck, his movements faster, harder, sweeter. Then my orgasm rippled through my body. One after the other, a never-ending tidal wave of pure, exhilarating ecstasy.
He came undone when I did, and with one final groan and last thrust, he slowed until he stilled in me. Our chests heaved from exhaustion, and our hearts raced against each other, beating as one.
