“What can I do for you?”
“I just wanted to see you. Can I come in?”
She stepped out of the doorway. “Of course. Did you have a question about anything I’m doing at your house?” She pulled a tissue from her pocket and patted her eyes and nose.
“No, I’m sure everything is fine. I got your note about finding tables.”
She walked to the couch and gestured for him to take a seat. He thought she looked tired, like maybe she wasn’t sleeping well. He wanted to pull her into his arms, press her head against his shoulder and offer comfort.
“Can I get you something to drink? I still have the beer in the refrigerator from the night you came to dinner.”
“No, I’m fine.”
“So, what can I do for you?”
He twisted so he could rest his arm along the back of the couch. “I’ve missed you, Robin.”
He watched her carefully. She blinked her slightly puffy eyes. The pink color on her pixieish nose intensified. He could practically see tears in her eyes.
“Robin, don’t cry.”
“I’m not crying,” she stated, her voice shaky. “It’s the moss and the dried flowers.”
“Of course it is,” he said, slipping closer. “So if I were to take you in my arms right now, that wouldn’t cause any sort of reaction from you.”
“I didn’t say that.” Her lower lip trembled as she stared at his with luminous, big brown eyes.
His heart beat faster, until he was certain she could see the pounding beneath his shirt. Something soft and needy unfurled inside his chest, and he knew he’d crossed a line when he’d entered her house this evening.
“Why don’t we find out?” Before she could protest, he pulled her close against his chest.
“Those darn allergies can be pretty rough,” he murmured against her soft, sweet-scented hair.
She nodded and settled more closely against him.
“Especially when you’re all alone,” he added softly.
A tiny whimper escaped her.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. Go ahead and cry if it will make you feel better.”
She shook her head ever so slightly.
“Why not?”
“Because it won’t do any good,” she said against his shirt front, her breath hot and moist through the cotton fabric.
“You might feel better.”
“I don’t think so. I think I’ll still be here, away from my family and friends, and you’ll still say you don’t want to get involved.”
“Maybe I changed my mind.”
She punched his arm. “Darn it, Ethan Parker, you can’t keep changing your mind. You can’t be polite and aloof in the grocery and the restaurant, then come over here and look like you want more than a professional relationship. I don’t know what you want! You’re driving me crazy.”
He smiled as he rested his cheek against her hair. “I know. I’m sorry.”
She sighed, pressing more hot, moist air through his shirt. His pulse rate jumped again. Good thing she wasn’t sitting across his lap or she’d be acutely aware of how much he wanted her…here, now.
“Ethan, I miss my life. I want to have lunch with my girlfriends. I want to develop new clients. I want to have Sunday dinner with my parents.”
“I know you do.” He pulled back a little to see her face, tracing the track of a tear with his fingertip. “You talked to Sylvia today, didn’t you.”
Robin nodded and sniffed. “She told me Bess was coming for a visit, and all I felt was jealousy.” She winced and closed her eyes, as though she were experiencing actual pain. “Can you believe I was jealous of your dear aunt because she got to go to Houston and I have to stay here?”
He gripped her arms and looked into her eyes. “Sweetheart, you don’t have to stay here. You made a decision to get out of Houston for a while. You agreed to house-sit, of course, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go back to see your family and friends.”
She shook her head again. “I’m just not ready to face them yet.”
“Why? You haven’t done anything to be ashamed of.”
“That’s easy for you to say. You’re not the one who did the walking out.”
“No, but coming to your senses is no crime. If it were, I’d have to lock myself up.”
She tilted her head in that adorable way. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that I’ve come to some realizations of my own lately, thanks to you. And also to my aunt, who pointed out a few facts to me before she left.”
“Like what?”
“Like what a big deal it was for you to cancel your wedding.” He smoothed a strand of her silky hair behind her ear. “Having never been rich, I couldn’t imagine what that involved. When Monica was planning the wedding in Dallas, I got involved just a little. She’d ask my preferences on things like flowers and the reception menu, but basically it was a small affair for our immediate family and friends.”
“Weddings should just be for two people, and those who love them.”
“You’re right, but I know they get out of hand. The second wedding was also small, but Belinda planned the whole thing. She was—is—a very traditional woman,” he explained, hoping Robin would understand why he hadn’t sympathized with her situation. “The difference was the attendance of so many people from Ranger Springs—people I worked with and served on a daily basis. Standing there at the altar with them watching, then coming to the realization that there would be no wedding, was more than embarrassing. I wanted to disappear into the floor. I wanted to hit something. I’d never felt so helpless in my life.”
Robin nodded. “I felt helpless to stop the momentum of my wedding. Once the announcement was in the paper, I didn’t have time to stop and think about what I was doing. I was comfortable with Gig in the sense that our families were close, our friends were mostly the same and our goals seemed to be similar. I just never realized how important a loving relationship was to me, nor did I realize how often Gig pushed me away when I tried to get close, until he accused me of smothering him.”
“I was the opposite. I didn’t want to look too close. I think all along that I knew, deep down inside, that I wasn’t ready to get married.”
“Oh, I still want it all,” she said with fervor, “but next time, I’m going in with both eyes open. I’m not going to pretend everything will be fine just because I make all the right decisions on silver patterns and caterers. I’m going to focus on what’s in my heart, not what’s presented for everyone else’s benefit.”
“Good for you.” He smiled in agreement at her heartfelt belief. But a part of him realized she was talking about some future, unnamed man she’d love. He didn’t want to think of Robin with someone else. He wanted her here, with him, so they could fully explore their feelings for each other.
“Next time, I’m going to make sure I get it right, because I quite frankly cannot afford another mistake.”
“What do you mean?”
“I felt so bad about the expense I caused everyone that I paid back my bridesmaids for their dresses and shoes, and I used the rest of my savings account to reimburse my parents for all the lost deposits.”
“With a wedding as large as you must have planned, I’m sure that was a pretty penny.”
“That’s one reason I’m house-sitting in Ranger Springs rather than lounging along the Mediterranean sipping champagne,” she said with a forced chuckle. Her attempt to make light of her situation fell flat.
“What you did was honorable.”
“Oh, I know money can’t compensate for everything, but I tried my best to pay back what I could. And I apologized like crazy, but I could still tell my parents and friends didn’t understand or agree with my decision.”
“No one else can know what’s right for you.”
“I realize that now. I just needed a little distance from everyone. I was so tired of looking into their eyes and seeing questions about my judgment, even my sanity.”
“They�
��ll come around,” he said, rubbing her shoulder in a consoling way. “They need time, too.”
“I know. That’s the last gift I gave to all of us—time apart.”
She hadn’t talked about her current feelings for the man she’d left behind in Houston, and that did bother Ethan on some basic level. Before he went any farther in their relationship, he needed to know. “Robin, do you think you’ll ever go back to Gig?”
“No,” she said adamantly. “At some point I suppose I’ll see him. I’ll try to explain, to apologize, once more.”
“You’re dreading that, aren’t you.”
“Absolutely,” she said. “Don’t you think your former fiancées would feel uncomfortable around you?”
“I suppose, but maybe that’s because I never did tell them I understood why they couldn’t go through with the wedding.”
“You really aren’t angry with them anymore?”
“Not angry—although I have to admit to some irritation that they had such lousy timing in telling me they wanted to break up,” he said, smiling as he tried to inject a little humor into their conversation. “But maybe you’re right. Maybe I need to tell them I finally understand.”
Robin smiled. “I just hope Gig will be able to feel more charitable about me in the future.”
“I think he will. He’ll find someone else. Oh, he might make you out to be the bad guy to his friends and family, but my guess is that any true feelings of anger won’t be there unless he was truly, madly in love with you.”
“You obviously don’t know Gig,” Robin joked.
Ethan chuckled. He was glad she could joke about the breakup. It had taken him two years to get to that point.
He sobered as he looked into her luminous eyes. Something was going on between them, something he didn’t understand yet. But he was determined to be honest with her and himself from now on.
“I don’t know how much this means to you, but I’m really proud of you, Robin Cummings.”
Chapter Thirteen
Robin felt as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders, after telling Ethan more about the wedding that would have taken place today. Yes, if she’d gone through with the ceremony, tonight she’d be sipping champagne at the River Oaks Country Club, wondering if everyone was having a good time, worrying that something would go wrong and become the topic of conversation for weeks to come. And later, she’d begin her honeymoon with Warren “Gig” Harrelson, Jr.
They’d make love, no doubt, although they hadn’t been intimate in months. That part of the relationship had soured about the time wedding preparations began—which should have been her first clue something was wrong between them. She couldn’t even imagine or remember making love. Not while she was sitting within the circle of Ethan’s strong arms.
She leaned back a little to look at him. He was so different from every other man she’d known. Ethan was strong, confident, intelligent. He seemed so certain of his abilities. He knew where he wanted to spend the rest of his life.
He was also incredibly sexy, and now that she was no longer sniffling and feeling sorry for herself, she became acutely aware of his scent, his nearness and his blue, bedroom eyes.
“What are you thinking?” he asked gently.
“I was admiring how you’re sure of your place in the world, and of your goals.”
“I’ve had a little more time to think about what I wanted.”
She dismissed his answer. She knew he was only three years older than her, based on his college diploma, framed and hanging in the hallway, and on what Bess had told her. “I’m not sure time is the key.”
He shrugged. “Then maybe it’s the circumstances. Who we meet, what we know. I don’t think there’s a simple answer, but I’ll make you a bet—I think you’ll know what you want by the end of the summer.”
“You think?”
He traced a finger along her cheek, sending shivers down her spine. “I do.”
“And what are we betting?” She looked into his eyes. Blue was considered a cool color, but at the moment, Ethan’s eyes burned as hot as molten lava.
He leaned closer, until she felt his warm breath on her mouth. “Why don’t we decide later, after we know each other a little better?”
“How much better?” she whispered, her heart racing.
“A lot better,” he said as his mouth hovered just out of reach. She wanted to reach up, claim the kiss she yearned to share, but she had to tell Ethan something first.
“Tonight was to be my wedding night,” Robin whispered against his lips.
Ethan froze for just a moment. She leaned back to see his eyes, still burning hot. What was he thinking? She hoped he wasn’t thinking of Gig or what might have been. But then Ethan’s lids lowered, his mouth descended, and she was lost in a wild kiss that took her breath away.
When they’d kissed before, she’d known he was holding himself back. Tonight, she sensed he was letting go. A wild, exciting passion pulsed between them. His hands molded her to him, while his lips teased and tasted. If he was moving fast, she didn’t care. She wanted him too much to keep any desire in reserve.
“Ethan,” she whispered, as his kisses continued down her neck. With one hand he pushed her cotton knit top aside; with his mouth he drove her crazy with desire. How did he know the point where her shoulder met her neck was one of the most sensitive spots? At the moment, she didn’t care how or why Ethan seemed to know everything about her. She simply wanted to seize the moment, share pleasure with him and create new memories.
His hand cupped her breast, his fingers searched and found her sensitive tip. Robin moaned as she sank into the cushions of the couch. Feeling his weight on top of her, his leg pressing between hers, seemed right and natural. And oh, so exciting.
She wasn’t worried about whether he’d respect her in the morning; she knew Ethan held women in the highest regard, and she believed he admired her for more than one reason. He hadn’t wanted a temporary affair; neither did she.
She didn’t know why this incredible passion was happening now. But she wanted this night with Ethan more than she wanted a future of regrets.
“Robin,” he murmured against her throat, “I want to make love to you. But if you don’t want me, tell me now.”
“I do want you.” She pulled his head up and kissed him hotly, her mouth devouring him. She tasted him thoroughly, then lightly stroked his bottom lip with her teeth. “I want you so much.”
Ethan responded with a hiss of breath and a tightening of his hands on her hips and waist. “Let’s get someplace more comfortable. Even with you stretched out on top, this couch is prettier than it is comfortable.”
“Gee,” she said, nibbling on his earlobe, “I hadn’t noticed.”
Ethan chuckled as he disengaged his arms and legs and struggled to his feet. His short hair looked as though it had been plowed in furrows, and his shirt was pulled loose from his jeans. Had she done that? The impressive bulge beneath his zipper spoke volumes about how much he wanted her, too.
The knowledge that she was responsible caused a secret smile she couldn’t suppress.
He reached down and pulled her to her feet, then scooped her into his arms.
“Ethan!”
“You were to be a bride tonight,” he said in a deep, sexy voice. “Let’s create our own fantasy.”
She felt tears threaten again, but this time they were tears of joy. She blinked them away and buried her face in his neck. “Down the hall and to the right,” she whispered.
He carried her easily, as though unaware of her weight. One of Ethan’s most admirable traits was his ability to focus on his goal: in this case, getting her to the bedroom as quickly as possible. Fine with her. She wanted to strip his shirt from his broad shoulders, pull him down on that queen-size bed and make love to him until they were both exhausted.
But would one night in his arms be enough?
As he maneuvered through the doorway, she pushed thoughts of the future from her mind.
She wouldn’t ask for commitment or explanation. She wouldn’t press for more than he felt comfortable giving. She wouldn’t expect more than a wonderful, passionate night…a wild, summer affair.
Ethan lay her down on the mattress in the same manner she might use to arrange an antique doll of delicate porcelain and lace. She could see his face in the light from the hallway, his expression both tender and hot.
He had started this fantasy, and she was more than willing to participate. Her shorts and top didn’t resemble a bridal ensemble, but she could pretend.
“Would you like me to undress for you?” she whispered.
He nodded, his eyes full of desire as he eased onto the mattress.
Her fingers made slow work of the buttons down the front of her knit top, then she pulled it apart, revealing her thin, lacy bra. Thank heavens she’d chosen something sexy over functional earlier today. She could tell by the way Ethan was watching, by his rapid breathing, that he appreciated the choice, too.
“Do you remember what you said before about not being the most exciting man?”
He nodded, his eyes hot and focused on her face as she changed his attention from what she was doing to what she was saying.
“You’re the sexiest, most exciting man I’ve ever known,” she said softly, wiggling her shoulders free of the sweater.
He shuddered, but said nothing.
She moved to the waistband of her shorts, loosening the button, lowering the zipper. Looking up at Ethan, she said, “Help me.”
His large hands skimmed up her legs, molding over her thighs and hips, before grasping the shorts and pulling them easily from her trembling body. Seduction was powerful, she realized. She’d never done anything this blatantly sexual, but her desires, her actions, seemed natural with Ethan.
He leaned forward on arms braced on either side of her. He claimed her lips, his tongue stroking until she arched from the mattress. But she wasn’t finished with this fantasy, and if he kept kissing her, she’d melt into a wax puddle on this comforter.
Breaking the kiss, she said, “Your turn.” She propped herself up on her elbows and shook her hair back from her shoulders.
The Bachelor Project Page 15
