Onyx: Heart

by J. S. Lee

  My breath hitched in my throat. “Dude, you’re killing me,” I groaned. “No. No, we don’t have time for that.”

  Xiao’s teeth nipped at my neck. “You’re mean.”

  I whirled around to face him. “And you’re a tease-” the rest of my sentence was swallowed by Xiao’s mouth as he pulled me close to him. My hands ran over his shirt, under his open jacket, appreciating the feel of his hard chest as his soft lips caressed mine.

  Someone cleared their throat, and I leaped away, finding a store attendant watching us with mild amusement. “Can I be of any help to you today?”

  “No, thank you,” I said, blushing, but unable to keep the smile off my face. When the attendant disappeared, I turned back to Xiao. “No planes, no fitting rooms, but you can sneak into my room later tonight.”

  “Promise?”

  I fished out the cardboard sleeve that held both of the keycards to the room I had been given. (Experience taught me that hotel rooms came with two keycards, and I wasn’t sharing, I had, conveniently, been given two.) I pulled one out to keep for myself, then, checked the sleeve to make sure it had the room number on for Xiao – just in case. Satisfied it did, I handed it over. “If you’re that set on small spaces, we can go in the closet.”

  “I need you to try this, hyung,” MinMin said, appearing out of nowhere, brandishing a shirt at him.

  Without missing a beat, Xiao slipped the keycard into his jacket pocket and then slipped it off his broad shoulders. “The fitting room, Xiao!”

  Xiao fixed me a look. “You just told me no fitting rooms.” The tip of his tongue was poking out of the grin he was giving me. Before I could give him my snarky retort, he had draped the jacket over my head. When I pulled it off, he was already marching to the back of the store.

  I turned to MinMin with an exasperated sigh. “Do you need more time, or shall we start ringing these up?”

  “This isn’t all of it,” MinMin told me. “But if that fits Xiao, I have one outfit complete.” He was brusque with his words and being careful not to let the clothes he was holding onto touch me, moved around me towards the checkout counter.

  I hurried after him. “MinMin, are we OK?” I asked him. I was probably sounding needy and paranoid, but I couldn’t shake the vibe that I had upset him somehow.

  MinMin ignored me, placing the pile of clothes in front of the guy at the till. “These too.”

  The assistant nodded, adding them to a pile that was already being rung up. MinMin had been busy. Now, his attention was fixed firmly on the numbers that flashed up as the items were scanned in.

  “I don’t know what I did,” I told him with a sigh. “But whatever it was, I am sorry it upset you. I’d like to know, so I don’t do it again, but I can see you don’t really want to be near me, so I’ll just back off.”

  MinMin’s shoulder’s slumped slightly, but I did as I said and backed away, literally. I moved over to a display of jewelry, not really staring at the jewelry as I spun it around. Instead, I was trying to work out what I had done.

  We moved through four more shops, MinMin buying a half-dozen items from each, at least, until our hands were too full to carry any more. I checked my phone before I collected the card at the last shop. We were twenty minutes from the venue (I’d checked) and had an hour before we needed to be there. “I need a drink,” I declared as we walked past the food court.

  “Sounds good,” Xiao agreed, following me to the near empty food court.

  We found a table in the corner and stacked all the backs in the back. I set Xiao’s jacket on a chair and then turned to the others. “What do you want?”

  “Poutine,” Xiao declared.

  “That’s not a drink.”

  “Something really Canadian.”

  I sucked in a deep breath. “You guys stay here.” I left them with the bags and hurried to the nearest counter, returning with three bottles of Canada Dry ginger ale, and a large portion of poutine. I wasn’t going to, but I’d never had it either, and I was curious. Now it was in front of me, I wasn’t so sure.

  I took the tray back to the table and set it down in the middle. “I found poutine, but I’m not sure how quintessentially Canadian Canada Dry is.”

  “It says Canada on it,” Xiao exclaimed happily, taking a photo of the bottles and the food. “I’ll ask our Gems if they have other recommendations.”

  MinMin sat next to Xiao in silence, not looking at me. I honestly had no idea what I had done, and it was killing me.

  Poutine was tasty, but it was pretty much fries, cheese and gravy. The tray didn’t last long between the three of us, which was a good thing as we needed to get to the venue.

  We hurried outside and hailed a cab. It wasn’t until we were in the middle of loading the trunk with all the bags that I realized Xiao was only wearing a thin, long sleeved top. “Where is your jacket?”

  “I’m not cold,” he replied with a shrug. I swear that was his motto… “But I gave it you.”

  “Oh, shit,” I muttered. I turned to the taxi driver. “I’m sorry. I left something in the food court. Can you wait here a few minutes?” I turned to the others, passing the remaining bags to MinMin. “I’ll be right back.”

  I set off at a light jog through the mall, back to the food court, my Converse squeaking on the marble floor as I rounded the corner. The table was empty, and there wasn’t any sign of the jacket either. “Crap,” I muttered, ducking my head under the table, just in case.

  I righted myself, catching sight of a cleaner’s cart. If anyone would have seen it, it would have been a cleaner. I hurried after her. “Excuse me!” she stopped and gave me a welcoming smile. “I don’t suppose anyone handed you a jacket?”

  “This one?” she said, holding up Xiao’s jacket. I could have kissed her. “A young man handed it to me.” She peered around me. “I think it was that gentleman.”

  I turned to look. The only person was a guy in a green parka, disappearing around a corner. I chill ran down my spine as I watched him go. It was completely irrational but from behind, the guy looked like Damien.

  “Thank you,” I told the woman, before heading back to the exit of the food court. There was no way Damien would have come to Toronto. That was insane.

  Wasn’t it?

  There was one way to answer that. Instead of heading towards the exit, I took off in the direction the man had gone, peering in each shop as I jogged past. Most were empty, only employees staring out at the crazy blonde peering in. Just as I hit the end of the floor I was on, I spotted a green parka. I skidded to a halt, holding my breath, despite the exercise, as I willed the man to turn around.

  Finally, he did.

  It wasn’t Damien.

  The breath I’d been holding burst from my body. “You’re a fucking idiot,” I told myself. “Why the hell would Damien the Dick be in Toronto?”

  Berating myself as I turned around, I jogged back to the exit where the taxi was still waiting. Xiao was leaning against the car, his arms folded. Although it was cold enough to see your breath in the air, he didn’t seem the slightest bit cold. Was he part polar bear? I slowed in front of him, handing the jacket over. “Where have you been?”

  I shook my head. “We need to go. I’m sorry for making you wait.” I dismissed his question, feeling far too embarrassed to mention I was hallucinating idiot ex-boyfriends.

  Somehow, we managed to end up at the venue on time. There was already a line (as I expected), but thankfully, we were able to get in through a side entrance. We went straight to the green room where Ina was in the corner, stitching up a shirt. She abandoned her shirt then joined us, peering in the bags. “These are nothing like their normal outfits,” she scolded me.

  “This is Canada, not Korea,” I pointed out. “I don’t know Toronto. I don’t know where the quirkier boutiques are. We found what we could, for one show,” I said, jumping to MinMin’s defense. I’d seen everything he’d chosen, and yes, there was a more western feel to the outfits, but with enough access
ories, one of them would work well for the hip hop feel Onyx had, and the other, jeans and oversized sweaters, gave off that perfect boyfriend vibe. It would be nice to see the softer side of Onyx on stage.

  “I chose them,” MinMin said as he and Youngbin joined us. “Kate is correct. We did what we could.” He turned to his leader. “I think we need to change the order of the songs a little to fit the outfit changes.”

  The rest of the group came over to investigate MinMin’s purchases. I left them to get ready. Seeing as my morning had been spent shopping, I hadn’t been down to the theatre where the fan meeting and concert was being held, and I needed to get my own lighting checks done.

  Time ran away from me, and it was soon time for the fans to come in. I refrained from going backstage. Although I had seen most of the items MinMin had chosen, I wanted it to be a surprise. I was dying to see the guys in those woolen sweaters.

  It was their first outfit.

  I died.

  Not literally, of course. But fuck me, all of them looked all soft and fluffy with their pastel sweaters. Xiao was in a pale pink oversized woolen sweater. CX’s, also oversized but a different knit pattern, was cream. Jiwon was in grey, close fitting with a polo neck. Youngbin was wearing a knee-length baby blue cardigan over a low-neck shirt. MinMin was in cream with rainbow stripe down the back. JongB’s knitted cardigan was purple, zipped up, with a hood. All of them had their hair brushed forward over their foreheads.

  All of them looked both sexy and adorable.

  “BOYFRIEND MATERIAL!” someone in the crowd bellowed.

  They weren’t wrong.

  And Onyx knew it.

  All during the fan meet, they acted cute and cuddly. Although the tour hadn’t included fan meetings in Asia, their behavior was much more suited to that area of the world which preferred the cuteness to the sexy. It was sweet. They were playing with all the gifts the fans had brought them – like they had at the other American dates – but there was a different feel to the stage.

  The lightheartedness remained right through to the end of the first third of the concert. As MinMin had suggested they had changed the order of the songs, which completely threw the audience, but also lulled me into a false sense of security.

  Suits.

  They were in freaking suits.

  I didn’t even see MinMin pick up suits. I’d seen the dark pants and a jacket, but I’d not realized they were suits.

  In the eight minutes they were offstage, and a video played to entertain the audience, their hair had been styled. With the exception of Xiao who had a wet look going on, all the others had their hair styled off their foreheads.

  I nearly choked on my own saliva.

  And damnit, Jiwon saw that. He gave me a smirk, while playing with his tie – which I caught with my camera. (There was no way in hell I was sharing that photograph.)

  I came alive after that. I’d taken hundreds of ‘boyfriend’ Onyx, but this suave and sexy image was going to double my picture count. Ina needed to up her game. MinMin had won this one!

  By the end of the show, I was horny as anything and exceptionally grateful Xiao would be joining me later. I moved around the venue with a purpose, doing my best to get our things cleared up as quickly as possible so that I could get back to the hotel.

  Onyx went back on the first minibus. Mine, with the rest of the team and the equipment followed a short while afterwards. It wasn’t until I stepped off the elevator that I remembered I’d given Xiao my spare keycard. I pulled out my phone to message him, to see if he would still be joining me, but stopped when I found MinMin waiting for me outside my door.

  “Hi,” I said, uncertainly. The earlier awkwardness had returned.

  MinMin rubbed at the back of his neck. “Can we talk?”

  “Of course.” I swiped the keycard and opened the door. I took a few steps in, but Xiao wasn’t there. “Come in,” I told MinMin, heading further into the room and dropping my bag on my bed, the phone and keycard next to it. I would send Xiao a message after I had spoken to MinMin. MinMin stood awkwardly in the doorway. “I don’t know about you, but I need a drink.” I opened the small minibar, ignored the prices, and pulled out two cans of Coke. “You want one?”

  “Sure.”

  I tossed one at him which he caught deftly. I opened mine instantly, taking a long gulp, then wrinkled my nose at the bubbles. MinMin just watched me. “Do you really want that?”

  MinMin glanced down at the can, then opened it. It promptly erupted, spraying him in liquid sugar.

  I started to laugh before I could stop myself, then hurried over. “I’m sorry.”

  MinMin stepped back, holding the can out to me. As I took it off him, he peeled his sodden shirt off. I tilted my head, my laughter dying. MinMin had a very slim body: no abs, but no fat. He had a scar on the lower right side of his abdomen. But that wasn’t why I was staring. It was because MinMin was modest.

  Of all the members, he was the only one who had never even lifted the bottom of his shirt on stage. Unlike certain other members who couldn’t wait to get their abs out, if the shirt he was wearing wasn’t overly long, MinMin would tuck it into the front of his pants to make sure it never rode up.

  I didn’t tend to stick around when Onyx were changing. Not for lack of trying, of course, but because Sungmin was usually there and kicking me out before I could enjoy the show. That didn’t mean I hadn’t caught glimpses of skin. Except MinMin. He would always find a screen, corner, or even a bathroom to duck into.

  When he caught me staring, I quickly diverted my eyes. “Go throw that in the bathroom and I’ll dig a spare t-shirt from my case for you to cover up with.” I quickly busied myself with ducking behind the bed where I’d left my case while MinMin disappeared into the bathroom. There was a soft bang. I swear I heard glass breaking, and then a thud, which had me whirling around. “MinMin?” I called, softly.

  There was no response.

  I snatched up my Onyx hoodie as it was at the top of the case and walked over to the bathroom with a frown. Just as I reached up to knock on the door, the shower burst into life. “MinMin, are you OK in there?”

  Had I hallucinated the breaking glass? MinMin had been covered in coke, so it made sense for him to take a shower, even if it was unexpected. He wouldn’t do that if he’d broken something. I hadn’t even been in the bathroom to see what was in there that he could break anyway.

  “I’m going to leave you a hoodie on the door,” I called.

  When I didn’t get a response, I started to move back towards the main area of the room, when the bathroom door opened behind me. As I turned, a fist appeared out of nowhere, hitting my chin.

  제 19 장

  Gangsta

  I awoke on the floor. I could feel the blood pumping around my head, particularly on my chin. I blinked a few times, groaning as I reached for my jaw.

  “Why do you always have to be so melodramatic?”

  I didn’t need to look at the owner of the voice to know it belonged to Damien. I opened my mouth to scream, but he dropped down, pressing his knee into my ribs as he clamped a hand down over my mouth.

  I screamed into his palm, the air quickly running out as I clawed at his arm. Just as black dots started clouding my vision, Damien removed his hand. It was just enough to get some air in me, but with his knee on my ribcage, it wasn’t enough to make my words louder than a wheeze. As I gasped for oxygen, he grabbed my wrists, gripping them tightly. “It was you in the mall.”

  “You ruined my life,” he snarled at me. “You got me fired, then Isabella left me.”

  Isabella was the woman he had been cheating on me with. “It’s not my fault she came to her senses.” Antagonizing him wasn’t the smartest of things to do, but I’d be damned if I was going to go out easily.

  Damien grinned at me. He looked psychotic.

  I had to fight to keep myself calm. I’d dated him for years and I’d never seen this side of him before. Then again, I’d never known he’d been cheati
ng on me for part of it, so I clearly didn’t know him as well as I thought I did.

  “She left me because of the lies you told.”

  “I’ve been on tour. I haven’t even spoken to my own mother in that time.”

  “No, but you told lies to the police and they turned up on our doorstep, looking for me. Then I got slapped with that fucking lawsuit.” The pressure on my chest increased.

  Just then, there was a soft knock at the door. I would have thought I’d hallucinated it if it wasn’t for Damien looking in that direction. In doing so, the pressure on my chest was momentarily alleviated. With the last gasp of air in my lungs, I screamed.

  It lasted only seconds before Damien’s hands clamped down over my mouth. The black dots were back again. Then, all of a sudden, there was an almighty crash and the weight was off me.

  I curled into the fetal position, coughing, wheezing, trying to fill my lungs, tears streaming from my eyes. A roar and a bang had me forcing myself to sit upright. There were two people – Damien and Xiao – fighting. I sucked in a deep breath and the let out the loudest scream I could manage.

  Xiao looked at me.

  Damien shoved him, scrambled over the bed, then ran out of the door. Xiao didn’t hesitate to run after him.

  Clutching at the wall, I pulled myself up, panting, trying to follow. I got as far as the bathroom when I heard the water running.

  MinMin!

  I pushed the door open, finding him on the floor, surrounded by the broken glass from the mirror which had hung above the sink. I’d just dropped down beside him, trying to check him, to make sure he was alive, when I heard someone burst into my room. The next thing I knew, Jiwon was scooping me up as Youngbin took charge, checking over MinMin.

  MinMin had a concussion and needed stitches on his hairline. Unlike me, the doctor was insisting he stay in the hospital overnight.

  My diagnosis was much simpler: bruises. A chest x-ray had cleared me of any broken ribs. I couldn’t feel it though. I was feeling numb.