Nathan stilled against her, a thunderstruck look flashing in his eyes before he cleared his throat and dropped his head, dragging in huge gulps of air. “Sorry, good Lux charms.” A low hungry sound vibrated in his chest when he finally lifted his gaze again. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what…” he shook his head, worry in the depths of his eyes. “I’ve never reacted that way before.”
Katenia’s head canted as she blinked at him. “Primal?”
He groaned and dropped his head against hers. “Not helping, woman.”
“I’m a fairy,” she murmured, confused by his reaction. “Sex is natural, and not something to be ashamed of, or hidden.”
He stilled for a heartbeat before he let out a low growl. “Just stop talking about it, damn it!” He straightened and lowered her to her feet, though his grip remained steady on her hips. “Can you stand?”
She shook her head. “I think so.”
Humor lit his face suddenly, and he leaned down to murmur in her ear. “It would probably help if you let go of me.”
She frowned up at him as delicious shivers raced over her skin. “I can’t stand up on my own yet,” she snapped in a whisper. “My legs aren’t steady.”
“I just asked…you know what, never mind.” He lifted his hands and gently untangled hers from the back of his neck. “We need to get to my aunt’s before it gets too late.”
“Right,” she murmured, nauseous all of a sudden. Going home meant facing her father and the rest of the Elder Council in her new, non-fairy form. Even if Nathan’s aunt managed to get her back to her fairy form, and the Council never found out about her body transformation, that she was a part of their world for ever how short a time would mean punishment and possible banishment. If they found out she’d let a human kiss her…she shuddered, thinking about it.
Worse, they had been threatening to pair-bond her to Aeron, the eldest son of one of the other Council members, to preserve the untainted bloodline. She’d held them off by being on her best behavior, and digging through antiquated laws to buy her time, but if she went back now, if they didn’t banish her, she had no doubt they would force her into the pairing.
Nathan’s face was suddenly right in hers. “Hey,” he murmured. “Are you alright?”
She forced herself to nod. As it was, he’d done enough for her already. He was a fixer, but there was nothing he could fix about her life.
He studied her for a long moment before he nodded, said good-bye to his sister and his niece, and before Katenia could say her farewells too, he’d scooped her up and was carrying her out the door.
She shifted and frowned at him as the apartment door closed behind them. “I’m not going to learn to walk if you keep carrying me everywhere.”
His massive shoulders lifted in a shrug. “No need for you to learn if we’re just going to get you changed right back.”
She couldn’t argue with that logic. She’d worry about what would happen to her if his aunt couldn’t change her if and when it happened. She had more confusing things to think about at the moment.
“Nathan?”
“Yes?”
“Do humans ever mate for life?”
“We can,” he murmured, dropping his gaze to her face for the barest moment as they reached the sidewalk, “but it rarely lasts a lifetime.” He started across the traffic. “What about fairies?”
“Why did you kiss me?”
He hesitated in the middle of the road and frowned at her. “Are you changing the subject?”
“No. I just, when I said primal earlier…”
He cut her off with a growl. “I said to stop talking about it.”
“I would if you would listen to me.” That had his gaze snapping back to her, his hand frozen on the handle of the vehicle door. She nodded once and smiled at him. “Thank you. When you were kissing me, it felt like you were trying to stake your primal claim on me.”
A muscle in his jaw ticked as he opened her door and set her in the seat without looking at her again. “You’re mistaken. Humans don’t do that.”
“I didn’t think so,” she murmured, confusion lacing her words, “and fairies don’t usually, either, but…”
He hesitated. “But, what?”
“It can happen, and I know what I felt.” She sucked in a low breath, and met his gaze before she could change her mind and hide the truth. “It would be a very bad idea, Nathan. For both of us.”
His expression went dark as he jerked his head in a nod. “Then it’s a damn good thing I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he snapped, and slammed her door shut.
As he started around his car, Nathan was so pathetically grateful for the seconds to get his emotions under control he could have kissed the damn ground. He was a terrible fucking liar, and if he would have had to face her for even another heartbeat, she’d have seen the truth in his eyes.
He had been trying to claim her. It wasn’t something he’d thought about, or even understood, but damn it, he’d felt it roar up inside of him like an inferno. If Lux hadn’t stopped them when she had, he had no idea what he would have done.
He dragged a hand down his face and slid behind the wheel, refusing to look at her. He still didn’t know what the hell was happening to him every time he touched her, and he wasn’t in a hurry for her to see the truths inside of him. That he wanted her, and had a caveman urge to possess her.
His jaw clenched. Because that had worked out so well for his parents.
He refused to say anything else as he pulled out into traffic and headed for his aunt’s house. If she wanted to talk, fine, but he was keeping his damn mouth shut before he got himself any deeper into a hole he hadn’t meant to dig in the first place.
Which was why he was so pissed off when he heard the words coming out of his own mouth without his permission. “Just out of curiosity, why would we be a bad idea?” He waited a beat for her to answer, and when she didn’t, he shot an annoyed glance toward her side of the vehicle, letting out a low curse when he saw her white-knuckling the door handle. “We aren’t going fast enough for either of us to be hurt if I crash, Katenia. You’re going to break your fingers if you don’t let up that grip.”
She let out a pathetic snort, her wide eyes darting everywhere, trying to take in everything all at once. “You say that like I have any reason to believe you. Fairies are not meant to go this fast. Look at all these vehicles.” A strangled sound escaped her when she paused to swallow. “How can this possibly be safe?”
“Airbags.” He tapped the steering wheel and pointed toward the dashboard in front of her. “And seat belts.” He reached over to tug hers on, pissed he’d been so distracted that he’d forgotten to make sure she was belted in before he closed the door. When the back of his fingers brushed over ample breasts, the tension in the enclosed space ratcheted up a few hundred degrees. His cock went hard, her nipples stiffened, and he was sure for a second she’d stopped breathing.
Clicking the belt into place, he yanked his hand back, and wrapped them both around the wheel. “Damn it. This has to stop.”
To his utter surprise, she shifted in her seat to look at him. “Why does it have to stop? Sex is natural for humans, right?”
Grateful for the red light, he pulled the car to a stop and dropped his head back against the seat. He closed his eyes and thought about math. Complex problems. That did nothing to ease his hard-on—the woman breathed sex and thought it was a good idea between them. He decided there wasn’t enough math on the planet to concentrate on to keep his mind from thinking about how good she’d feel screaming in bed beneath him.
“Nathan? Are you alright? You look like you’re contemplating ways to kill me.”
He managed to crank one eye open to glare at her, even as he let out a shuddering laugh. “No, Katenia,” he gritted out through clenched teeth, “killing you is not what I am thinking about. I thought you said we would be a bad idea?”
“I did,” she said, her beautiful face screwing up in confusion. “P
air-bonding between us would never work. Sex, however, sex is a very good idea.”
Nathan nodded once, finally understanding. Ignoring the honking of the line of cars behind him, he rolled up one shirtsleeve, and pinched his arm.
“What are you doing?” she asked, her voice worried.
He barked out a laugh when the pain did nothing to wake him from whatever dream he’d landed in. “Testing myself.”
“Oh,” she murmured. “I don’t know what that means.”
“I don’t, either, but seeing as how I am not certifiable enough to have sex with a fairy, the only other logical conclusion is I’m dreaming.”
“Oh,” she repeated, still sounding confused. “Are you dreaming?”
He sighed, and shook his head, accepting the facts as they were laid out before him. “No. My whole world view has just been altered, but unfortunately, I am not dreaming.”
SIX
KATENIA CONSIDERED HITTING HIM. The man looked miserable and uncomfortable, but that didn’t mean he had to be mean. She gripped the handle thingy when he started moving the vehicle again, and glared at him. “Are you done insulting me?”
“No, damn it. You need to start making sense before one of us does something we’re going to regret.”
She started to ask him how she wasn’t making sense, but then she noticed something worrying. “Nathan, your eye is twitching.”
He pressed a palm to it and nodded. “It’s your fault.”
Her grip tightened on the handle. “Please, can you keep both hands on the wheel? I don’t want to die.”
He let out a low growling sound before he did as she asked. “Here’s an idea. No talking until we get to my aunt’s, alright? Because honestly, Katenia, I can’t handle much more of this conversation.”
She ground her teeth together and turned her attention back to the rapidly changing scenery.
“Well?” he snapped.
She turned very slowly to stare at him before she finally understood. She nodded, not sure if she was relieved or heartbroken. “I got it. You’re insane. Right? You tell me not to talk, then snap at me when I don’t. You’re like Elder Asenia.”
“I don’t know—” his words cut off as he sighed. “Who is Elder Asenia?”
“She is one of the eldest fairies in our valley. Some days she insists she is a goat.”
He didn’t say anything for a moment, before he nodded. “If I’m crazy,” he ground out, “it’s because you’re driving me there.”
“I don’t understand,” she finally admitted. “I thought human men were more casual about sex than this.”
He snorted.
She sighed, and shifted in her seat, trying to get comfortable in the enclosed space. While she could understand the convenience of a vehicle of this type, it wasn’t natural, and it showed a total lack of respect for the Earth that nourished them.
When he pulled to a stop again, she leaned forward, staring out the open window-thingie next to her. “Nathan, what are those children eating?”
He glanced over, then shot her a confused look. “Ice cream. You’ve never had ice cream?”
“No. Is it healthy?”
To her surprise, he chuckled. “No, but it is wonderful anyway.”
“Oh.” Because she didn’t know what else to say, and he didn’t want to talk about anything involving them, she went back trying to get comfortable. While she noticed a lot of human females wearing the same type of clothing, Katenia felt like her skin was suffocating.
“Are you alright?” he asked after a long few moments. They’d turned out of the crowded area, and now, just minutes later, there was nothing but rolling hills and trees. She perked up, her uncomfortableness forgotten.
“Oh, my,” she murmured. She stuck her head out the window. “It’s beautiful. Where are we?”
“Elm Springs. There are some beautiful gardens coming up.”
She gasped as they passed house after house, each one with a lawn garden more beautiful than the next. Bright, gorgeous flowers spilled over windows and pots, the grass so green it almost hurt her eyes. She’d never seen so many flowers together before. Even at her highest when she was flying, there had never been anything like this. Suddenly, she could see the benefits of being human, being surrounded by all of nature’s beauty this way.
“Does every house have a garden as beautiful as these?”
“Around here, yes. If you like these, wait until you see my aunt’s.” He chuckled again. “Just whatever you do, do not pluck one of the roses, or you may lose a hand.”
Her head whipped around to stare at him. “She’ll cut off my hand?” she asked, terrified. The woman had her kidnapped, and now she was capable of cutting off a hand for the price of a rose? “Nathan, are you sure—”
He cut her off by reaching over and wrapping his fingers around hers. “I’m kidding,” he murmured. “Calm down, no one is going to hurt you.”
Katenia felt her heart swell in her chest as his large, strong hand wrapped firmly around hers. She blinked up at him. “I don’t understand you,” she murmured.
“Yeah, well, don’t feel too bad about it,” he growled as he glanced at her. “I don’t understand myself at the moment.”
“But why would you make a joke about cutting off someone’s hand? Is removing a limb amusing for humans?”
“No.” His brow furrowed, before he shook his head. “It’s a figure of—never mind. I’m sorry for scaring you.” He jerked his chin toward the front window. “We’re here.”
She glanced to where he’d gestured, only to sit up straight as they wound through the most beautiful, spectacular garden she could ever imagine. It was a riot of color, every hue of the rainbow everywhere she looked. The flowers and plants all ran together in what looked like a messy, haphazard way, but it only took her a few seconds to realize the quiet ingenious behind the randomness. She sat up straighter, excitement and hope building inside of her, her hand gripping Nathan’s.
He glanced at her. “What is it?”
“Each garden is designed for a specific type of fairy, or pixie. That’s a water sprite’s garden there, and the one with the sunflowers is the sky fairy.”
His brow winged up. “Sky fairy?”
She bobbed her head as she smiled. “Yes. I am from the Lillie Valley. We primarily live in lilies, or compatible plants and trees. The sky fairies like to be in the air, so they sleep in sunflowers.”
Nathan knew he should be concentrating on what she was saying, because if she was right—and he had no reason to doubt she knew what she was talking about—it meant his aunt knew exactly where Katenia had come from, and that was half the battle.
But like the bastard he was, her excitement wasn’t contagious. He wasn’t ready to let her go yet. She infuriated him, challenged him, and confused him with every word that came out of her perfect mouth, but he’d felt more emotions in the last couple of hours than he’d felt in the last couple of years. He didn’t feel like the walking dead anymore, and for the first time since he’d been a teenager, he didn’t feel like he had a gaping hole inside of him where emotion was supposed to be.
Forcing a smile he didn’t feel, he pulled his car up in front of his aunt’s sprawling Victorian mansion, noticing as usual that it needed a fresh coat of paint, new stairs, and new balconies. He sent her money every month to pay for the upkeep of this elephant, but she insisted on putting every penny of it into her gardens, saying month after month that one day, he would thank her for it.
He snorted. Not likely. And he doubted she was going to be thrilled with him, either, once he accused her of kidnapping.
Reaching into the backseat, he grabbed Katenia’s plant, and slid out, going around to her side to help her to her feet. His body was already braced when she stood up, her amazing body brushing against his as she leaned into his side, steadying herself. “You okay?” he murmured, searching her eyes. “I’m sorry for being an ass.”
Her brow screwed up in confusion, and her freckled nos
e wrinkled. “I do not understand. When were you a donkey?”
He laughed, he couldn’t help it. “No, ‘ass’ means asshole.” When she continued to give him a blank look, he grinned. “Jerk? Bastard?”
“Oh!” she said, relief flashing over her face, before she frowned suddenly. “Why would you apologize for being born to an unwed mother?”
“I wasn’t—never mind.” He crooked his fingers under her chin, lifting her face up to his. He realized his mistake immediately; she had the most kissable mouth he’d ever seen, and he was sure he could lose his soul in her eyes. Instead, to prove to himself he could do it without screwing it up again, he leaned down and brushed his lips gently over hers. “I’m sorry for upsetting you.”
Her lips parted on a soft gasp, and to his surprise, she went up on her toes and kissed him back. “I’m sorry for upsetting you, too.”
* * *
“Oh, good, Nathan,” a lilting Irish voice sounded from behind him, “I see you got my gift.”
Ignoring the old woman for the moment, he looked down, searching Katenia’s face. “Listen. No matter what happens here, I will find a way to get you home, alright? I promise.”
He’d expected relief, so the worry and fear colliding in her eyes shook him. She didn’t want to go home. And then it hit him. “In your fairy size. If you can grow, I’ll find you a way to shrink back.”
* * *
She smiled and walked into his chest, wrapping her arms around him. “Thank you, Nathan. For everything.” She lifted her face until he could see hers. “No matter what happens, nothing is your fault, alright?”
He started to tell her he wasn’t that hard on himself, but the look in her eyes worried him, and had his body going tense. Yeah, there was something going on in her head he didn’t know about, and it scared him.
Before he could figure it out, his aunt’s voice pitched to an ear-shattering level. “Nathan Malone Alexander, what have you done?”
Shadows and Stars Page 18
