No one had ever wanted him for himself. It was always what he could give. Some deep part of him wanted Victoria to come to him for more than that. Of course, it was a notion of a silly, love- struck boy to say the least.
“I want to help Mandy, I want the store and I want to be with you, I want to do those things . . . those things I saw . . .in the show.”
Surprised and stunned with immediate pleasure and joy that suffused his entire being, William stared down at her while warmth spread through him like honey on warm bread. She wanted to do the things she saw in the room with him. William could have whooped with joy.
“I want to be with you too, Victoria, more than you know,” he said knowing, but not caring that she would never remember their whispered words. What mattered was that she desired him despite the circumstances.
“I . . . it is wrong to want this I know, to do those things, but I . . .” She broke off and her eyes started to close.
He said, “It is not wrong darling, nothing could be more right…nothing.”
He was not sure how or when she had come to matter so much, but she had.
“Don’t sleep, sweetheart.” He shook her gently. “You must stay awake.” Her eyes opened. She stared at him with beautiful, shimmering blank eyes. He wanted her to stay awake for a while because he was afraid if she slept she might not ever wake up.
Her hair, free of its pins, tumbled over his arms to the velvet seat in glossy silk locks.
“Tell me about your mother,” he suggested as he gently ran his fingers through her long, dark tresses plucking out the dangling hairpins.
“Mother?” she asked, her eyes taking on an even more distant look.
“Mother would not like what happened in that room,” she said absently.
He chuckled low at her uncomplicated statement. “I imagine she wouldn’t.”
“William, do you want me to do those things then?” Her words were slow and husky as she focused her soft, blue gaze on him.
“What things? Tell me of them,” he softly impelled.
His blood pounded through him as an eternity passed.
This carnal desire to hear her describe the sexual scene in the room was perverse and reprehensible. He should be ashamed for asking her to reveal her feelings and hunger her salacious words, but he was not in the least disconcerted. He was undoubtedly a depraved man when it came to this woman.
When she started her recounting of what happened in that room, leaving out no detail, her low and husky voice was more potent than any drug. Even when she struggled over some of her descriptions with enchanting innocence, his lust almost overwhelmed him.
“I never knew . . . about those things . . .” she finished, her voice low and rasping. “I knew I wanted to do those things with you.”
He clutched her tightly. “Oh God, Victoria, if only you knew how much I want those things darling,” he confessed.
She smiled a dreamy, child-like smile that stole the air from his lungs.
“I am going to take care of you, sweetheart,” William promised as he searched her eyes for a glimmer of coherent thought. Possessiveness swept through him like a relentless tide. He wanted her. She would belong to him and he would take care of her.
“I know you will,” she whispered, smiling an open, trusting smile. “You know, I don’t know very much about being with a man. I mean, I know what goes on, but I know very little.”
He gently touched her cheek. “I will show you everything darling and you will know all there is to know about giving and receiving pleasure with a man.”
Her focus fixed on him.
“But I don’t want anyone looking at us from behind a glass wall,” she amended, her forehead wrinkled with grave thoughts.
William laughed low, hugging her close. “Don’t worry, sweeting, we will not be entertainment for others.”
When he was a younger man, still wild and curious, he had once watched a “show,” but it held no appeal for him, then, or now.
However, it concerned him a great deal that Victoria had seen the show. Even drugged her description was too vivid for one so young and innocent of the world. When she was herself again he wondered how much she would recall.
“You shouldn’t have followed me,” he told her firmly pulling aside the curtain to peer outside. “You have landed yourself into a lot of trouble.”
It was nearly dark now and the streets were almost empty which would give him plenty of cover to bring Victoria into his house undetected.
“I needed to talk to you about our deal, I didn’t want to wait,” she answered softly. “But why did you go to that place?” She lifted her head from his shoulder to stare up at him with wide dark cobalt eyes.
“I wanted you so badly Victoria.” His voice dropped as he searched her eyes. “I needed you, but I didn’t want to seduce or coerce you. I wanted you to have a choice and to decide on your own,” he sighed searching for the right words, if there were any such thing.
“The need became so great. I know you don’t understand about men, but I can tell you that I wanted you and thought I could find relief with Lotus.”
“So it worked then, this Lotus took care of you…that way?” She asked disappointment in her eyes and voice despite the potent drug to disguise it.
“No, it most certainly did not work, little one, as if you have a right to know such things.”
“It is good to know,” she said, her eyes drifting closed again.
He was afraid. Would she go through withdrawal from the drug? He had seen so many destroyed lives because of an addiction to the drugs.
He kissed the top of her head inhaling the scent of rose water and woman.
When they pulled up to his mansion a few minutes later, Chester jumped down from the driver’s seat and opened the carriage door. William stepped out with his bundle. An instant later the mansion doors opened spilling light into the deserted street. Carter, the butler, stepped out squinting into the darkness then tapped down the steps of the house to assist.
“Is everything all right, sir?” Carter asked in his Scottish burr, his eyes on William’s bundle and his silver brows rising in surprise and concern.
“Ask Lolly and Mina to help me get her into bed,” William commanded calmly.
Carter had been in his family since William could remember. The old Scott was barrel of a man, with not one hair on his round head. However, even at his advanced age Carter was fit and quite handsome with twinkling blue eyes and a warm Scottish manner. William often reflected that the house would be chaos if not for Carter and his head housekeeper, Lolly.
“Hello,” Victoria greeted Carter with a wide smile.
“Hello there miss.” Carter returned her smile then slid a glance of complete understanding to William before he left to find Lolly. Carter was more than familiar with the behavior of a person suffering the effect of drugs. Carter’s own nephew Albert had tragically succumbed to the vice just last year.
Inside the house William conveyed Victoria up the massive, sweeping staircase. During the trip, Victoria regarded her surroundings with wide-eyed wonder, the drugs apparently making her feel free to express her feelings about everything.
“William, is this your house?” she asked in a slow but awed voice.
“Yes, it is,” he answered as he reached the top of the stairs and turned down the hall to a row of doors.
“It is just beautiful.” Her eyes were glazed and bright.
Nudging open the door with his foot, William carried her into the room that adjoined his own. It was the room intended for the mistress of the house. Taking her there was a thoughtless, automatic action that he decided he didn’t wish to correct. He wanted her near his room.
One of the housemaids, Mina, hurried into the room and pulled the bed covers down before William gently placed Victoria on the massive bed. Lolly soon emerged and both women discreetely but curiously eyed William’s unusual burden while they bustled around the room.
Victoria’s hair fanned
out on the pillow in a lovely, dark cloud of curls.
“Find me a gown for her.”
Lolly hustled out and down the hall to the room where Lilly, William’s cousin stayed when she visited from New York and returned with a frilly but modest pink nightgown.
Lolly motioned for Mina to help her change Victoria.
“No, I will help her,” he said as Mina and Lolly approached the bed. Without batting an eye or uttering protest, Lolly left the gown on the bed for William.
“Is there anything more you would like for me to do, sir?” Lolly asked, her eyes never moving to the beautiful girl on the bed. William’s staff was trained extensively and that training included the art of not being a nosy servant.
“Bring me some coffee and perhaps a little soup,” he said wondering what else he could do.
“Yes sir. I will be right back,” Lolly said.
Mina and Lolly quietly left the room pulling the door closed behind them.
This was getting too personal.
He was supposed to set her up in a nice little house, a place close enough for him to go to when he felt the desire to do so. He was supposed to make a monetary investment in her, buy her clothes, trinkets and jewels. And that is where it should end.
He should have turned her over to Mina and Lolly ... that is what he should have done.
Yet, in actions absurdly out of character, he was caring for her like a nursemaid!
Her beautiful blue eyes opened up dark and silent skimming over the room like someone awake inside of a dream. If Li had given her too much she might suffer permanent brain damage. A sharp and uncustomary worry enveloped him.
She was still responsive and talking, and those were good signs.
“Let me help you change,” he quietly said.
“Okay,” she responded smiling a dreamy distant smile putting her arms up like a little child to allow him to undress her.
As he removed each piece of her clothing William valiantly tried to overt his gaze, but it was impossible to turn an insouciant eye to her soft curves.
She was a man’s wildest fantasy fulfilling his imagination’s most intimate predictions.
Her wild, dark soft hair fell down her tiny waist, past her shapely hips and pooled on the bed around her.
He inhaled deeply the scent of roses mixed with her personal luscious scent that drifted to his nostrils.
His hand trembled slightly as he pulled the lacy pink gown over her head covering her naked beauty.
Never had he wanted a woman so badly.
Easing her down onto the pillows William prepared himself for a long night. He should leave her to the maids, but he made no move to leave.
Instead, he pulled the chair to the bed and sat down taking her hand into his.
1CHAPTER 12
During the early morning hours, Victoria’s pain started. William recognized the ugly effects of toxic chemical withdrawal illustrated in gnawing pain etched in Victoria’s face.
The doctor had come and gone hours ago, but there was little he could do to help her.
While his physician guessed that it was a form of opium he was fairly certain she would recover except for the craving as she came back to this world.
William was somewhat knowledgeable about the opium that floated around the city since he had been trying to get it outlawed, but this particular opium seemed more potent than any he had previously encountered. Or had it just been the dosage?
He had never experienced the effects of the drugs, but anyone who ever observed the particular lethargic hell that a person in this pathetic state suffered would never indulge in the drug.
“I love you pap . . . . I am trying mama . . . . taking care of Mandy,” Victoria cried out, flailing in William’s arms completely in her own isolated awareness of the world. “I am, I am, just come back Pap, Ma . . .” Victoria had revealed many things in her uninhibited state of mind during the long night.
Her arms swung out to him again and William was barely swift enough to catch her as she shot straight up from the bed.
“Pap . . . Pap!” She cried in agony as he held her.
Her “pap” and “ma” were gone. Her words echoed in the room before settling like a cold lump of ice deep in William’s chest.
“No sweetheart, it is not your Pap. It is I darling, William. Stay quiet and it will pass.” William spoke softly to her while gently settling her back onto her pillow for the hundredth time.
During the long night she laughed and cried in William’s arms. The drug lifted her up to lofty heights only to drop her back down again to the earth, and then, to hell below.
Victoria’s long dark hair was tangled and matted to her flushed cheeks. After so many hours her body slowly became weak in his arms. Still, she continued to fight him even when he thought all of her strength must be gone. Inside, William simmered with a deep burning rage that was exceeded only by his deep concern.
For the first time in his life he felt completely powerless.
What the hell had he done? He had invited this innocent country girl to his colorful, jaded kingdom where he believed he reigned supreme and she had been gravely harmed under his care.
But worse still, he knew she would do anything for her sister and to keep that damned store. Anything. And anything is exactly what he had asked her to do. Like some besotted fool, he had been distracted by this all-consuming lust.
He should have known she would get into trouble. Didn’t he know she was just the kind of woman to get herself into trouble?
Any woman who dared write a letter like the one she wrote to him, not to mention coming all the way to San Francisco to see him, could not be taken lightly.
Certainly she shouldn’t have followed him to Lotus’ house.
He clenched his fist in impotent frustration.
“Please, take me back to get some tea” Victoria begged in a pitiful whisper gripping his arms. “I feel so bad.” Tears ran down her ashen face, her sapphire eyes starkly reflecting her mania.
“No, baby, no baby.” William pulled her into a tight embrace, consoling her in low, gentle tones. “It is no good for you.”
She whimpered in response, her body trembling and damp.
“It will be over soon,” he assured her.
“Don’t let me go,” she pleaded.
“No, I will not let you go. I will be right here for you as long as you need me.” William said holding her small quaking body firmly while gently running his fingers through her tangled hair with his free hand.
This was his damned fault for trying to corrupt her. She was not worldly or jaded. She was an innocent from the country. She probably went to church regularly.
In fact, he could easily and clearly picture her entering a little white church dressed in one of those infernal, provincial calico dresses that reminded him of clean country air and fields of flowers.
Holding her hymnal.
Singing.
He cursed under his breath, pushing the ridiculous thought and image away.
Despite this unfortunate incident, she wasn’t meant for any damned churches. Or singing hymns. She was meant for passion…his passion. And her own.
William’s troubled thoughts continued until dawn broke and Victoria finally settled into a deep sleep.
William left her in the care of a maid long enough to have a bath, change and return to her bedside. Later, Lolly brought him breakfast in Victoria’s room.
William sent a message that he wouldn’t be in the office that day and had his messenger bring back some things from the bank that he needed to work on.
Opening the door that connecting his room with hers, William sat down at his desk and worked into the better part of the evening.
Still, Victoria slept.
He went to bed in his own room with the door open the second night. The doctor had come again and assured William she would be fine and was now merely sleeping off the effects. So why couldn’t he bring himself to just leave her in the care of the m
aids and go to the bank as he should do?
Obviously his emotions were already involved to a point he would not even contemplate. If he was an intelligent man, the man he was before he ever saw Victoria Riley, he would leave for the bank and put her out of his mind before he involved himself any deeper.
Even with those thoughts to bend his intent, William’s heart leapt and he rushed to her bedside when he heard her stirring in the next room.
*****
As she came out of a deep dreamless sleep Victoria’s head throbbed as if someone had taken a giant timber and beat her over the head with it.
Slowly, cautiously, she opened her scratchy eyes to a blinding-bright sunny world.
The first thing she saw was a heavy cream and gold brocade canopy above her, supported by gold posts, carved in an intricate design of cherubs, vines and birds.
Victoria carefully turned her aching head to one side to get a better view of the room.
This was undoubtedly the most beautiful room she had ever seen and even exceeded the opulence of her hotel room at the Palace.
The perimeter of the cream colored ceiling was framed in an intricate gold leaf pattern. Like the gold-posted bed, all of the furniture in the expansive room was gold and carved in intricate designs of birds, vines and cherubs.
The drapes, unsuccessfully pulled against the early morning sun, were the color of her mother’s eggshell colored wedding slippers and accented with gold trim.
Beside her on the table, two happy, fat, naked, little gold cherubs made up the base of a large lamp.
Where was she?
A sharp pain shot through her head to the back of her eyes causing her to wince.
When the pain had eased, she tried to clear the cobwebs from her throbbing head and recall how she came to be here in this strange beautiful room.
“Victoria?” William said quietly.
She gingerly turned her head toward his voice.
He stood in the doorway a few yards away, his smoky eyes filled worry and tenderness.
When her gaze locked with his, William smiled warmly and walked to the bed.
Too weak to respond, Victoria wordlessly stared at him as he approached.
“Good morning beautiful,” he said softly.
The Letter Page 10
