“I love me too,” she said, winking. “And you.”
“I should kick Jake out and have you move in.”
“Girl, in a heartbeat,” she said, nodding. “Hell, just stick me up a murphy bed on some wall and get me a big chest for my clothes... I'll be here.”
I watched her for a second. “Oh, my god... could you imagine the look on Jake's face?”
“When I move in? Or when I make him put together my murphy bed?”
I laughed. “Never change, Shay.”
“Promise,” she smiled through a mouthful of food. “So when are you going back to see Doctor Sex?”
“Tomorrow at seven.”
Shay nodded, then pointed her fork at me. “You're gonna need steel fucking balls to get through another session with him without losing your shit again.”
I nodded.
She was right.
“That's the plan.”
Seventh Session
Alright. I could do it. I had a lifetime of experience shutting myself down. I could do it to any situation that I knew would make me anxious. Going to the dentist? Shut down. Going to jury duty? Shut down.
Going into the arms of the man I had feelings for... Shut. Fucking. Down.
I showered, forewent makeup because I wasn't going to try to impress him anymore, and slipped into a long sleeved dress because, well, it would make less of a project out of getting naked. And I was going to be naked. And we were going to be having sex. I was going to let myself experience the act of sex, enjoy it, have an orgasm. But I wasn't going to let myself think about it, try to mine feelings out of it.
It was just sex.
Besides, it was only another two sessions of intimacy. The he was going to take me out and teach me to flirt with other men. That was good. I needed that. I especially needed him to be the one to throw me at other men. That would just further cement the fact that he was not into me.
The last session was my choice.
Could my choice be to not have a session? I doubted it. Talk therapy would be hard. He would want to know what had flipped a switch, why I was so different. And while I might be able to brush it off when we had other things on the plate, I doubted I could fool him when talk therapy was the main course.
Oh well.
It was just going to have to be a refresher course then.
He could fuck me goodbye.
“What the fuck is Shay talking about?” Jake asked, standing in the doorway to my bedroom.
“What do you mean?”
“Something about a damn bed in the wall.”
“Oh, that,” I said, smiling a little.
“What do you mean 'oh that'? You two bitches can't be serious.”
“I can assure you,” Shay said walking behind him, “this bitch is dead serious. I'm sick of my roommate. And I am needed around here.”
“Fuck you are,” Jake said, lowering his eyes at her.
“What's the matter, Jakey?” she asked, leaning against the doorway, making him squish back or move into the room. He stood his ground and squished. “You afraid of what it will be like to have a roommate you can't walk all over?”
“I don't walk all over...”
“You kind of do,” I said, shrugging.
Unable to defend himself on the topic, he quickly changed it. “We're too fucking old to be living like a bunch of poor college kids.”
“Oh, what the hell does it matter?” I asked, sitting down on the edge of my bed to slip into my shoes. “I'll let her crash in here. It's not like I need the privacy.”
“There,” Shay said, smiling. Victorious. “It's all settled. Sorry you're going to have to start washing out those nasty ass protein drink shakers. Oh, and dig out your old tools.”
“I don't have any tools.”
“Then you better go buy some,” she shrugged, pulling a nail file out of her pocket and starting to shave some of her nails.
“Why the fuck do I need to buy tools?”
“Because you're building my bed.”
“No, I'm not,” Jake said, folding his arms over his chest, trying his damndest to stand his ground while it was crumbling underneath his feet.
“No? Would you like to tell my brothers that?” she asked, pulling out her phone and searching through her contacts. “I have three. One is a cop, the second is a marine, and the third is a cage fighter.”
“She's fucking with me, right?”
“Actually, no,” I said, thinking about the huge towers of muscles that had visited her at work on occasion.
“Fuck it all to hell,” he growled, charging past Shay.
“Where are you going?” I asked, my voice sickeningly sweet.
“To the god damn hardware store,” he grumbled, slipping into a shirt.
“Hey, Jake,” Shay called.
“What now?”
“I walk around naked a lot,” she told him, smirking.
“You fucking better.”
And that was how Shay came to live with us.
Okay.
I took a deep breath, reaching for the door handle.
I could do it.
No, I was going to do it.
“Ava,” he said, sending me a sweet smile. Light gray suit, black shirt. Two buttons. I really needed to stop realizing little things like that.
“Chase,” I said in return, locking the door.
“How are you feeling?”
“Can't complain,” I said, moving across the room. I wasn't going to let him walk to me. I was the one in control now. No matter how much I was shaking inside.
“You sure? You seem a little...”
“My roommates are at each other's throats,” I said, moving into his office, leaving him to follow behind me for a change.
“Roommates? Plural?” he asked as we stepped into the other room and I went to the stereo.
“Yeah. Shay is moving in,” I told him, trying to figure out what play list would work. No more slow, sexy songs. No more metal. I was beyond that. And while what matched my mood was the “heartbreak” play list, I wasn't going to let him know that. I looked under the 'sex' title and found 'love making' and 'fucking'. Then I chose 'fucking'.
I turned, taking my martini from a very perplexed looking Chase.
“What?” I asked, feigning innocence as a very raunchy song came on through the speakers.
“Nothing,” he said, shaking his head, watching as I drained my drink.
“So session seven,” I mused.
“Yeah,” he said, shaking his head again and gesturing toward the nightstand.
There, settled in a pretty white wicker basket, was what looked like a supply of sex toys. I walked closer, curious, and found packaged vibrators, feathers, floggers, handcuffs, and butt plugs. Yes, butt plugs. Apparently, we were at a kinky point in my training.
“These are just here in case you want to experiment. There is no pressure. Some of the items in there are things that some people will never have any interest in and that's fine. But I like to bring it all out because it can be easier to point out something instead of telling someone that you want to try it.”
Right. He knew that from experience. From his other clients.
I reached in, grabbing the lilac purple vibrator and tossed it on the bed.
“Yeah?” he asked, smiling.
“Sure, why not?” I said, stepping out of my shoes and quickly reaching to haul my dress up over my head.
Chase's breath hissed out of his mouth.
Because I took the whole 'easy access' thing to a new level and forewent a bra or panties as well.
“You were just... walking up my street pantyless in that dress?” he asked, his eyes hot, a smile still playing with his lips.
“Yes. Now why are you still dressed?” I asked, proud of how sure my voice sounded.
Chase's brows drew together, his head tilting to the side for a moment, considering me. Trying to figure out why I
was so different. But then he started slipping out of his clothes and I sat down on the edge of the bed, grabbing the vibrator and working at opening the package. Anything to keep my focus off of him for a moment.
There was just something about watching a good looking man undress for you. It did things to your insides.
And I couldn't let him have that effect of me anymore.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his pants fall to the ground just as my fingers finally broke through the thick plastic. I put my full focus on what I was doing, prying the plastic apart and releasing the uber smooth vibrator. Before I could even close my hand around it, Chase's hand was grabbing it from me.
Surprised, I looked up, watching as he twisted the cap off, inserted batteries, and closed it in seconds. Like a pro.
Which was exactly what he was.
“Lay back and spread your legs.”
Oh, bossy Chase.
Damn it.
I took a deep breath, scooting back on the mattress, looking up at the billowing white canopy material, and letting my legs fall open.
The vibrator came down on my heat. Already wet. There was no denying my body's reaction to him. And that was one thing I didn't want to fight. I flinched away from the cold. And then he flicked it on and my entire body shuddered, hard.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Why did women need men when those things existed?
He moved it slowly up to my clit, pressing hard against it and holding there.
My hands grabbed hard at the bed sheets, my back arching painfully, my inner thigh muscles shaking slightly at the completely overwhelming new sensation. The groans came out wild, wretched from some primal part of me buried deep inside.
Then before I could even get used to the feeling, an orgasm ripped through me. Hard. Violent. Unexpected. Making me cry out loudly, my body wrenching away, curling up on my side and being helpless to do anything but let it roll through me.
“Jesus Christ,” Chase hissed, the buzzing sound clicking off. I felt the bed give under his weight and his hand settled on my naked hip from behind. “Baby?”
Augh.
No.
The pet names.
Someone didn't tell my belly to stop doing the flip-flopping.
“I'm fine,” I said, before he could say anything else.
“You sure?” he asked, and I knew he was looking at me like he was afraid I was ready to bolt.
“Yep. That was just... intense.”
“Yeah, I know,” he said, his hand starting to stroke up my spine. “Just watching you through that... fuck me.”
I rolled back onto my back. “Go ahead.”
“What?” he asked, his brows drawing together, his hand snaking up my belly.
“Fuck me,” I suggested, making sure I kept my eyes on him.
The surprise on his face was worth the wobbly feeling I had in saying it.
“What?”
“I said go ahead and fuck me.”
“Jesus,” he said, shaking his head.
I sat up quickly, moving to the end of the bed.
“Babe... what's the matter? Where are you going?”
I turned back, holding out a condom from the nightstand. “Just getting something,” I said, handing it to him.
He eyed me again, breaking open the condom. No doubt, still trying to piece things together.
Good luck, Chase. It was my life's mission that you never find out.
He slid the condom on, watching me. I moved to lay back down, but his arm shot out, his hand grabbing my arm. “No. We did that already. Time for something new.”
“Okay,” I shrugged.
“Come here,” he said, patting his thigh.
Oh, my.
Okay.
I moved slowly, unfolding my body then going to straddle his waist. “Like this?” I asked, letting one hand rest on his shoulder.
“Yeah, baby,” he said, his hand sliding between our bodies to grab his cock, sliding it between my slick folds. I groaned, biting hard into my lips. “You're going to ride me. Show me how you like being fucked.”
Oh
my
god.
Alright.
“Okay,” I agreed and felt his cock slip downward, pressing against the threshold, and waiting.
“You're in control,” he said.
Damn right I was in control.
I took a slow breath, lowering my hips down, feeling him press inside me, spreading me. My eyes closed on a groan.
“That's it, baby, take me in.”
Fuck.
I pressed lower, taking him in, taking him in as deep as my body would allow, the new angle making him hit places he hadn't the last time. My forehead went down on his shoulder, taking a deep breath as he filled me completely.
“You're so fucking tight. You feel how your pussy is squeezing me?”
Oh, I felt it alright.
“Find what feels good, Ava,” he told me, his hands going to my hips.
Everything. Everything felt good when he was inside me.
But I shifted my hips upward, letting him slide halfway out of me, before pressing back down on a moan.
“That feel good?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I whimpered, doing it again.
“Try this, baby,” he said, taking my hips when I took him to the hilt again, and moving them toward his body, then away, his cock pressing up against my g-spot in the process.
“Oh, my god,” I groaned, grabbing his shoulders.
“Make yourself come, Ava.”
And then I did.
A slow, rolling, pulsating that had my fingers digging in hard enough to draw blood.
I collapsed against him, shaking slightly.
His hands moved up and down my spine and as I came down, I could feel him... still hard inside me.
I moved lazily backward, looking at him quizzically.
A smile toyed with his lips. “Yeah, I'm not done with you yet,” he said, his voice deep and sexual. And it sent a stab of desire right where our bodies met, making me clench around him. His smile spread wider, “You like that idea don't you?”
I pursed my lips. “Eh, maybe.”
He chuckled, grabbing my hips and hauling me off of him, throwing me none-too-gently onto the mattress.
And fuck if it wasn't one of the hottest things in the damn world.
“All fours,” he said, going up on his knees.
I rolled over, a thrill of excitement settling in my belly. The bed shifted and I looked over my shoulder to see him standing at the edge of the bed, in all his naked glory.
When I didn't immediately move to do what I was told, his hands reached out and grabbed my ankles, pulling them hard until my knees teetered on the edge of the bed. “I said all fours,” he growled.
My belly fluttered, my sex clenched, and I fucking got up on all fours.
“Good girl,” he murmured, his hands going to squeeze my ass. Then they went away to slide down the backs of my thighs. And then his hand reached out and slapped hard. Hard enough to make me cry out and jump. “Now spread your legs.”
Oh
my
god.
Bossy and dominant Chase? I just... couldn't. It was too much.
I spread my legs.
I felt his cock slide between my thighs, moving to the entrance and holding there. “I am going to fuck you,” he said, his hand sliding up my back toward my neck, then gliding into my hair. His fingers closed, grabbing my hair hard and jerking me upward by it. “Hard,” he added.
Jesus
Christ.
Then his cock slammed into me, burying deep. “Elbows on the bed,” he instructed and I moved downward, the position making his hand pull harder on my hair. My ass angled up toward him and his other hand settled right above it.
Then he was fucking me.
Hard.
As promised.
It was wild, primal.
And I felt myself fall away into it.
All that was left was the feeling of him in me, making me claw at the sheets, burying my face in them to keep the screams muffled.
“I want to hear you come,” he scolded, yanking my hair until I lifted my head.
His cock slammed forward.
And I came.
And the entire fucking neighborhood could hear me.
“Fuck, fuck fuck fuck,” I ground out as the waves just kept coming as he kept thrusting. “Chase...”
He thrust deep, “Fucking perfect,” he ground out as he came as hard as I did.
I collapsed forward on the bed. Spent. There was nothing left.
He walked away to the bathroom and came back, getting into the bed next to me, staring up at the ceiling. He patted his chest, “Come here.”
But I couldn't. Even if I wanted to.
Which I absolutely, positively did not want. Nope. No way.
All I managed was a strange garbled sound.
He chuckled, turning his head to look down at me. “A little come drunk, huh?”
“Shut up,” I grumbled, my body thick and heavy.
He laughed, shaking his head, his hand landing on my ass cheek, squeezing quickly.
“That was fucking amazing.”
Is that in your professional opinion, doctor?
I was getting bitter.
Which was good.
It kept things in perspective.
I made an acknowledging noise, because it was amazing, then tried to will my body to lighten up, to let me be able to move it.
But I stayed infuriatingly numb.
Chase shifted, moving upward and leaning over me. Then started planting kisses from the base of my neck downward.
And I suddenly wasn't numb anymore. I was definitely feeling that.
I knew I should take the opportunity to get up, to get dressed, to leave. But it felt too nice to walk away from.
It felt like worship.
He kissed down my spine, shifting slightly, kissing one of my ass cheeks, the down the leg to my ankle, then up the other leg, across that ass cheek, then up my spine again. Every inch of my body felt tingly. Light. Loved.
The Sex Surrogate Page 17
