That made her sad, because she knew that Scott’s image of these alien hybrid women is more like Barbarella than ice cold grey bitches with piranha teeth. “Oh, and we are bitches,” June sighed to herself. “The biggest bitches of them all.”
Feeling a drop in her jacket pocket, June slid her hand in, finding the small glass bottles full of blood. She fingered one, then two, and — ahh, three. They were warm to the touch. How fresh was it? Standing she, gave Scott an earnest hug. June meant that hug, because Scott was a great spy.
After slipping an envelope full of cash into Scott’s hand, June walked away feeling satisfied. Clarissa would sell these quickly and that would fatten her wallet. Giving the bartender a quick glance before reaching the door, June could see that he was starved for answers from June about “what happened to them.” He’d die hungry is all June could conclude.
Back on the street, June knew it was time to head toward Lisa. Time to confront her and get it over with already, but the feel of the blood vials in her pocket distracted June from what she should do. The Red in her pocket was money for her account. Money in that account meant she could go bye-bye forever.
Clarissa scooted down a dark hallway in the Grey. She was one of the mothers who rarely left the Grey. She’d been forgotten in the crowd of lookalikes since long ago. Clarissa was compliant, a tame Woman of the Grey that had never found her inner beast.
June had found Clarissa long ago, instantly recognizing the potential for molding her into whatever she wanted or needed of her. Clarissa would bow to any master who gave her the slightest peck of affection.
June had Clarissa believing they drowned in forbidden love together. Clarissa believed that one day June would take the money from their selling Red to the Women of the Grey and both of them would disappear hand-in-hand, proclaiming victory.
Clarissa believed in June without doubt. She never second-guessed the love of her life or the plans she had for escaping The Grey. Clarissa believed her feelings for June were love, nonfiltered and in its rawest form. June saw it more as worship.
“How much does she want?” Clarissa stared at her runner, Mother Cara. She had heard Cara clearly but couldn’t believe such a request for Red was being made.
“What could she want to do with so much?” Clarissa asked while Mother Cara shrugged. Superior Mother had asked for a cup of Red. Not a small glass container like everyone else, but a cup. “Tell her we’ll get it, but it’ll take time. I’m not sure when June will be back.”
Mother Cara left quickly. She never did stick around anywhere. Cara was squirrelly, uncomfortable to watch, and most of the time impatient to be anywhere but where she’d go next. Clarissa felt sorry for Cara. She seemed awkward in her own skin, as if every breath was baited in worry.
Locking her bedroom door, Clarissa took out her own glass container of Red, dipping her pinkie in. She gave herself a generous smudge of it on her forearm, knowing that this much was uncalled for, but Clarissa was convinced that she needed it. Not wanted Red, but needed Red.
She needed to forget June for a couple hours. Forget the Grey, these walls, her sheets, the never-ending chores and the fact that she had not seen the sun in years. Closing her eyes and laying back Clarissa was careful to hang her forearm off the edge of the bed. She didn’t want to accidently wipe Red off. It was a precious commodity.
Clarissa let out a long, slow sigh. Red was starting to soothe, to quiet her thinking. For Clarissa, Red began with a nibble of warmth where the smear was, then spread out inch by inch, faster and faster till a small WHAM happened in the brain. That was Clarissa’s favorite part.
She could lay down and focus on the warmth spreading itself over her. When she felt it go to her throat, she’d start to think about something she liked. Something that would take her away from her preoccupations and anxiety.
Today Clarissa thought of movies. When she was out on her breeding mission, her boyfriend had been fond of movies. Smiling, Clarissa remembered the dark of the theater, the smell of the oily popcorn, and her boyfriend’s sweet hand in hers. They’d watch movies about monsters, vampires, ghosts, and small naughty lizards that took over a town one Christmas Eve. That one baffled Clarissa, but she loved the way he laughed at the movie.
Mmmmm, the warmth of red was now on her earlobes. The WHAM would happen soon. Clarissa thought about the movie they had watched where an animal that her boyfriend said was a raccoon had a large gun and a tree for a best friend. It was so…
Lisa
Watching Israel shove taco after taco in his mouth, Lisa felt both amused and pissed off. He was well again, but still mostly silent. Did he expect them to live like this? Was she expected to walk side by side with a self-inflicted mute?
Sitting under a tree in the desert town, Lisa opened her backpack and took out a book. She had smuggled a couple of books from the local, the one she was reading now was about a boy that was living in a giant peach. This book was doing nothing to help Lisa get smarter, but it did distract her from the dirt of this ugly town. The dirt from the town went up Lisa’s nose, stuck to her eyeballs, and most of all pissed her off. City air with its gloom was better than this. She couldn’t understand why humans lived here.
The town was busy. There was a bustle of movement, people shifting from one end to the other in the endless smog of car exhaust. The sun never seemed to go away here. Lisa had been there for 3 days now. It felt more like months.
After reading the same paragraph three times, Lisa put her book back into her backpack. She wanted to lay down in the grass, but the grass felt brittle, as if it was sucked dry by the desert sun. She was used to grass that was lush. A cushion from mother nature.
Lisa pitied the grass. Like herself, the grass under Lisa had been abused. She should be less judgmental of it. Placing her palms on the ground, Lisa built small pancakes of ice all around her. Soon the ice would melt and this grass would get a small drink.
Israel brought Lisa a plate with two tacos and a soda. This was a feast for them. They usually survived on hand-outs, which meant most of the time they lived off of air. The meat was savory and the tortilla folded into her hands. Lisa couldn’t remember ever having this kind of cooked beast before.
Cooked beast is what she called meat when she first left The Grey. The Grey was a vegetarian raw food purgatory. Meat made Lisa smile. Eating meat made Lisa feel like she was giving Superior Mother the middle finger right up her nose, and that made every bite tastier than the last.
“Have you found her?” Lisa asked Israel in between bites. “Her” meaning the next Woman of the Grey that she would probably have to kill. Looking around, Lisa couldn’t believe the rotten luck of that Woman of the Grey. Was this her first mission? After being sent to this wasteland, she’d never want to leave The Grey again.
Israel shook his head, and then sat up a little and said, “That part is done. We will not hunt them down again. It’s useless.” Lisa sipped her soda, eyes locked on Israel. She didn’t dare interrupt. This was the most he’d spoken in weeks, maybe months.
“An hour outside this town is the Grey. We will go there.” Israel laid back on the crumbled-up grass and put his hands under his head, as if he were on a tropical beach somewhere without a care.
Lisa, put her soda down, choking out her question. “And do what?”
Israel looked over at Lisa, and maybe it was the bright sun or the full stomach, but for a second, he looked like the guy she had met a long time ago. The happy barista running his coffee shop.
He smiled at Lisa “Kill them all.”
Back at the dingy hotel room, Lisa watched Israel settle into the bed, click on the TV, and relax. It was unsettling to watch. She felt like slapping him, provoking him, stirring up shit. Instead, Lisa took her book and made herself as small as she could in a corner of the room.
She had done this when she was a daughter of The Grey, finding a small corner to tuck herself into. A place to hide while in plain sight. The mothers couldn’t accuse her of hiding
from them, but it was easier for her to go unnoticed. Being ignored and not noticed was the best strategy with the mothers of The Grey. Lisa was convinced that not one of them had a nurturing bone in their bodies.
Nose in her book, Lisa spied Israel. His casualness was unsettling. After he told her that they — meaning the two of them — would “kill them all,” Israel simply stood up, took Lisa by the hand, and walked back to the hotel, whistling.
Lisa was spooked silent by everything. She had so many questions, but instead she had followed Israel right back to the hotel like some well-behaved child. Wiping her eyes, Lisa pushed her back deeper into the corner, hiding her face behind the book. She knew that wasn’t true at all. She had followed Israel back to the hotel like a well-trained dog.
The whole situation reminded her of a song she’d heard on the car radio when Craig was driving them to the beach. “I wanna be your dog.” That was pathetically true. She needed to be with Israel, no matter what. He was the only home she’d ever known.
His face, skin, smell, every inhale and exhale called to her. Daily, Lisa woke to face her day only for him. Her fight was a fight for Israel. They were Beauty and the Beast. Drawing her knees up to her chest, shoving her book into her breasts where it would be impossible for her to read, Lisa nodded in agreement with herself. She was the Beast.
She — no, they — just needed a castle. Pushing herself forward, Lisa did a slow crawl across the floor towards the bed. Not having it in her to stand, she did her best dog impersonation. “You need to tell me more.” She looked Israel in the eyes, something she hadn’t done for a long time, not being able to handle the look of stress on his face. Israel clicked off the TV and sat knee to knee with Lisa. Nodding, he smiled, then took her hand.
“I met a group of people.” He squeezed Lisa’s hand then, but let it go quickly, shoving his hand under his thigh to warm it up. She was always too cold for him to tolerate. “It happened one day while you stayed behind and I went out hunting. They approached me to warn me about you. These people had seen you with me.” Israel then huffed, running his hands up and down his arms. “My friend Allison put my picture up on their group website as a missing person. A missing person that could have gone missing because one of you took me or murdered me. These are a group of people that know of The Grey.”
The name Allison stung Lisa a tiny bit. Sort of like an ant bite. She hadn’t thought of that woman since the day she had run away with Israel. Allison, the apartment manager. Allison the nosy bitch.
“Go on…” Lisa whispered. She was having a hard time staying still. Lisa’s heart was in her throat. She wanted to punch him and then leave. Not because of ending The Grey, or these people, but because Lisa sensed the end was near. He’d be rid of her soon and then what? She’d spend her days, haggard, walking the streets with nothing but a broken heart to show?
Broken heart isn’t dramatic enough. When Israel is done with her and walks away, because he will, she will be homeless. No base to touch. No ground to walk on. She’ll be shattered. Wasn’t it better to leave now, before he shoved that knife in?
Lisa started to scoot off the bed, glancing behind her looking for her boots.
“Stop.” Israel reached out, putting his hands-on Lisa’s thighs. Lisa did stop moving, but only to relish his touch. Whatever kind of touch it was, she’d take it. She needed it. His warmth filled her. He’d never understand. Lisa looked at Israel again. She’d never understand either.
“I told them you were different. That we are in this together. They understand that you are on their side.” Israel voice became almost tender. “Don’t be afraid. They won’t hurt you.”
Lisa smiled at him. “Correction, they can’t hurt me.” And for some reason…a reason that Lisa will never understand, she showed Israel her real face, then got off the bed, and shoved herself back into her corner.
Sunny
With measured steps Superior Mother entered the room where Sunny was kept. She watched herself not only because of Sunny but because of herself. Superior Mother considered herself irresponsible these days. She was nothing more than a bratty teenager with a drug habit.
Being hyper alert, Sunny could sense the drag in Superior Mother’s steps. She was a wounded animal, and Sunny knew at that moment she’d be an easy kill. Sunny could sense in a glance the feel of the person or the persons in the room. With the Women of the Grey, Sunny felt territorial, like an animal protecting itself from predators. Superior Mother was the head predator. She had the sharpest teeth of them all.
When Superior Mother came near Sunny, the predator feelings flashed in neon. She was the alpha of her kind and Sunny sensed that. Her extrasensory perception was warning her that the mothers, especially Superior Mother, would kick her down if she gave them a half second to do so. These women were not her friends. Kia, Sunny knew, was her friend and kindred sister.
Pulling a chair over to the cage bars, Superior Mother sat looking at Sunny, studying her like a caged animal at the local zoo.
“Hey there, my sweet. How are we?” Sunny rolled her tongue in her mouth, almost tasting the hatred she had for Superior Mother. How could she not hate someone who kept her locked up and acted like it was a favor?
“Cat’s got your tongue again…just when I was starting to think I could maybe let you out for a bit.” She smiled at Sunny then, that sugary smile that appears right before the whip comes down. Superior Mother never did a thing in Sunny’s favor.
Sunny never fell for the saccharine words, the winks, the calm demeanor. She knew better. Whatever Superior Mother told her were lies. The day would come when Sunny would get her chance at Superior Mother. A fine day when she’d watch Superior Mother’s head roll down the hall, kick it, then open the front door to The Grey and unleash herself on the human world.
“I’ve seen you and Kia chatting. I thought maybe you’ve made a friend.” Brushing nonexistent lint off her shoulders. she leaned forward, locking her eyes with Sunny’s. “Very surprising, sugar doll. I did not think you had it in you.”
There was a small skip in her voice when she said Kia’s name. Sunny took it as a hint. She wasn’t surprised that Superior Mother knew of Kia’s nighttime visits. After all, there were cameras all over the room. There have been cameras on her since she got here.
What surprised Sunny is that she actually knew Kia’s name. She thought the names of the daughters, women, mothers of The Grey were unimportant to her. We all look alike, so we must all be the same.
“We are all the same and none different.” Sunny whispered to herself. It was hard to think with Superior Mother so close. Her urge to kill was fierce. It was an urge that had urgency to it. It needed satisfaction and none was ever given. There was a buildup of this urge in Sunny. It was crusted over and she wanted to scrub it off. Starting with the killing of Superior Mother.
“If you keep giving me the stink eye, I’ll never bother to let you out. I want to let you out, my dear. I really truly do, but there are trust issues.” Superior Mother scooted her chair back, and it was then that Sunny noticed a small splatter of something on her pants leg.
What was that on her? Superior Mother, like every mother in the Grey, was always glittering clean. They practically sparkled, so why this small stain? To anybody else, to the humans, to anyone normal, such a small mark was insignificant, but to Sunny it was a tell. Rolling her tongue again, she smiled at Superior Mother. A big smile. A fat dimple-cheeked baby smile. Something was wrong with Superior Mother and Sunny relished the idea of it.
“Send me to school. That would be great. Or not. I don’t care.” Sunny never, ever let Superior Mother know what she cared about. How could she? They had her locked up because they considered her dangerous. If she told Superior Mother the truth of what she felt and thought about all the time, she’d never let her out.
Sucking in her breath, Sunny did her best to keep a straight face and not allow Superior Mother to see the thought that had just popped into her head. Sunny cared about Kia. S
he must never let Superior Mother know it.
“Don’t you want to go play with your bestie, Kia?” Superior Mother smiled when she said Kia now. That bitch has something up her sleeve. Sunny knew it, but wouldn’t show it or say it. “I don’t care.” She widened her eyes and gave her best look of annoyance, then pushed her face against the bars of the cage. This brought her closer to Superior Mother, and the urge to slash at her throat flew through Sunny’s hands. Her true face was coming, she could feel it. Pulling herself back, Sunny rolled her eyes. “Can you go away now? You are not interesting.” At that Superior Mother laughed.
“Damn, I thought anything would be interesting to a girl locked up in a cage.” She stood up, then walked to the door, making a show of reaching for the door knob. Superior Mother opened it and left the room without a goodbye.
Late that night, Kia laid on the floor next to Sunny’s cage. She had brought a blanket with her this time. She felt safe in being gone longer because the mother that was in charge of the girls that night had a large two finger smears of blood on her bicep. She was out for the night, maybe longer. Kia felt ashamed when she looked at the mother’s arm. Ashamed for that mother who did not bother to hide it. The smear was there for all to see. Well, Kia shrugged, for those like her that were brave enough to look.
At other times, Kia would have gathered a couple girls that did not believe her when she told them that mother wasn’t getting up that night. That this mother and almost all of the mothers did this thing to themselves, and this thing made them sleep and, most importantly, not care. Tonight, Kia didn’t bother. Tonight, she wanted nothing more than to get to Sunny. Talk to Sunny, tell her about her day, about the mother’s smear.
“It was a big smear tonight. Bigger than I’ve seen before and” Kia raised her tone just a bit for inflection “it was TWO smears.” Kia rested her head on her arm, then pulled the blanket up to her shoulder. “Walking over here, I kind of thought that was good. If she does it again, then I can open her drawers, look through her stuff, do more than just steal the keys to your room.” Kia smiled at Sunny “find the keys to the cage.”
Women of the Grey- The Complete Trilogy Page 51
