by Lauren Dane
“My head is a jumble.” She narrowed her gaze at him when she’d come out of treatment to find him at their kitchen table.
“You’ll adjust in a day or two. Your system was used to three times a day and you’ve just given it less. I told you it would be difficult at first but then easier.” He sipped his kava and she felt the irrational need to smack it out of his hands.
Julian came in through the front door. He’d been gone four days on some mission somewhere. Vincenz had been gone for two of those four days and she’d been there with Pesch, who had left her alone when she’d wanted it. She hadn’t needed a babysitter, but she’d appreciated not being alone in the middle of the night when she woke up from a bad dream.
“I’m home and I have a present for you, beautiful Hannah.” He handed her a bright blue package and she sat at the table to unwrap it. First the silky ribbon it was tied with, which she set to the side carefully.
He watched patiently, never urging her to just rip it open as many would have.
“It has two sides.” Delighted, she discovered the bright blue outside had a sunset orange inside. “Like fruit.”
“When you cut into it,” Julian said to Dr. Pesch, who nodded, understanding Hannah’s comment.
Inside the little box lay nestled a pair of earrings. Red glass with threads of silver all shot through it.
“I thought they would catch the light.”
She smiled at him. “Thank you.” She put them on and tried not to hurry from the room so she could look at them in the mirror in her bedchamber.
They did catch the light beautifully when she wore her hair away from her face. He thought he was so sneaky, that man. She laughed to herself. He liked her hair back and so he enticed her to do it. It was so adorable she pretended she didn’t know what he was up to.
She could do that. In their home with one of them there. She caught some back from each side of her face and clipped it back with the combs he’d brought her only a week or two before.
He grinned when she returned. “They look beautiful on you.”
She sat back at the table trying not to get caught inhaling him. The sun had left an imprint on his skin, he smelled warm and strong. “Thank you again.”
“Dr. Pesch says Vincenz has been gone this week as well? I’m sorry to have left you without one of us.”
“I’m fine. You have a job to do.” She was so pleased to see him she had to give herself a stern mental talking-to not to rub herself against him. “I went to two treatments a day.”
He squeezed her hand and pushed a slice of cake in her direction.
“Cake!”
Julian laughed then and kissed her quickly. “I’m glad you’re pleased.”
“Pleased is a mild word for what I feel.” She leaned forward and then turned to him a little. “Having my hair back is a good thing so I won’t get frosting in it.”
He received those words like the gift they were and enjoyed himself watching her breathe in the chocolate in her cake. A weakness for sweets, had their Hannah. It pleased him unbelievably to bring her pleasure. To tempt her, spoil.
She picked up the fork as she examined the cake until she’d decided just exactly where she wanted to cut into it. The perfect ratio of cake to frosting as she raised it to her lips, took a breath and slid the fork into her mouth as she made a sound that shot straight to his cock.
He paused as she savored the taste of it, guilty for a moment as he thought of Vincenz. Captivated by the way she enjoyed the fuck out of that cake. Gods above and below, he should not be thinking this way about her.
“This is the best thing ever created. Thank you for bringing it to me. I’ll even share with you and Dr. Pesch even though he said going to two days would be easier and it has been a challenge instead.”
She arched a brow and charmed Hal Pesch when Julian knew he’d meant to be stern with her. Several weeks ago Julian had noticed her do it to Vincenz. He’d figured it was a fluke, but it had bloomed into this Hannah.
She was getting better, he realized as he watched her. He noted the strain around her eyes but also the genuine joy in her body language. She liked Pesch when she’d been steadfastly wary of him in the beginning.
She’d gotten some color from working in the garden. The thinness she’d come to them with had disappeared as she’d gained weight and muscle from the workout he’d created for her.
This Hannah was the full, three-dimensional-in-vibrant-hues version of the near ghost she’d been. It looked good on her.
“I’m going home to have dinner with my wife.” Hal stood up. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“That’s all right, Hal. I’m here so I can do it.”
“Are you sure?”
“What’s her new schedule again?”
Hannah watched, astonished by the way they had a complete conversation about her without consulting her a single time. She knew they didn’t do it to hurt her feelings, but she wasn’t invisible.
Vincenz came home and it was like the sun had come out again. He swept in and dropped a silk-wrapped bundle. “Tea from … well, from my travels.”
They were very good to her. Spoiled her with these little treats of theirs. “Thank you, Vincenz.” She stood. “I’m going to make some; would anyone like a cup with me?”
But Vincenz had been drawn into the conversation Julian and Dr. Pesch had been having and unbelievably also seemed to have all sorts of opinions about her but no need to ask her.
“I’m not a piece of furniture.”
The three of them looked to where she’d just slammed the kettle onto the grill.
“What?” Vincenz asked.
“I appreciate what each and every one of you do for me. I can’t tell you, Dr. Pesch, how truly thankful I am for the treatment. Even when it jumbles my head, I’m still better than I was yesterday, and the day before. Julian, to you and Vincenz, who alter your schedule to be there when I am in treatment. But I am not invisible.”
Vincenz took a step closer but she held a hand out. “Of course you aren’t. Why would you say that?”
“You just talked about me for several minutes. Consulting each other on scheduling, on frequency of treatment and the eventual tapering down to once a day. You discussed how I reacted to these changes. How I was improving in this and that way. Talked about my sleep patterns and how well I’m eating. Not once did any of you include me in the conversation. I lived as if I was less than human. I won’t go back there again. Now I’m going to go have a bath.” She turned and stalked from the room.
After Hal had gone, Vincenz headed to their room to change and then met Julian back in the kitchen.
“That was a pretty stunning sight.” Vincenz still couldn’t quite get over the way Hannah had stood up for herself.
“Didn’t notice it, I bet, but she had her hair back away from her face the whole time.” Julian leaned in to kiss him and they slid into each other for a bit, coming home. “I missed you this week.”
Vincenz licked over his bottom lip to savor Julian’s taste just a little longer. “Missed you too. Masturbating just isn’t the same as your hands on me. And we were traveling rough so the food I was eating couldn’t come close to what I get here. Feed me and fuck me and I’m all yours.”
Julian laughed, nipping Vincenz’s chin. “I’m starving so why don’t we take care of the feeding part first and the fucking part can come later.”
They settled into their rhythm in the kitchen, Julian taking care of the cooking while Vincenz did the prep work.
Julian put a lid on something and turned back to Vincenz, who’d gone to pour some juice at the table. “The treatment is setting her on her ass. I don’t like it.”
“Hal said it would be much easier tomorrow. He said they’d be tapering to one day next week and then she’d be done.” Vincenz shrugged. “I’m sure it’s me being a man and all, but I liked seeing her pissed off. Not in that way she had before, all her rage at what they did to her. But normal-woman mad. You know w
hat I mean.”
Julian’s smile tipped up. Just one corner of his mouth and a shiver went through Vincenz at the sight. “I do.” He stretched like a big cat and a slice of his belly showed, muscles playing against the taut skin.
Vincenz drew closer and Julian’s smile ticked up a little more until that dimple showed. “Not much more thrilling and terrifying as a beautiful woman. Never know what the fuck they’ll do when you get ’em riled up.”
Vincenz snorted. “Yes. Fierce in a way only a woman can be.” He paused to light one of the nearby candles before looking back. “I’d love to take a bite of you right now.” Vincenz walked past Julian and took a kiss instead. “She’s getting better. She was shadows and reflections for a while. But this Hannah is no one’s shadow.”
“I was just thinking that earlier. She’s gaining weight, looking better too.” Julian patted his ass when he moved to take the soup from the cold box. “You know you can bite me any time you like.”
“Mmm. I plan to. And to leave a mark.”
They flirted a little more until dinner was ready and Julian had gone to tap on the bathroom door and tell her to come eat.
It was when Julian came back that Vincenz remembered. “We have to tell her about her parents. It’s been two months now. She needs to be told.”
“Can’t we tell her tomorrow? Just let her have enough for one day?”
Vincenz felt similarly. But it had to be done. Pesch had been in support of not pushing the issue of her parents and she hadn’t asked. In a way Vincenz had felt she knew but didn’t want to admit it to herself so they left it alone.
She was strong enough now.
Still, the two of them seemed to have drawn ranks around Hannah to keep her safe. “You’re protective of her.”
Julian snorted. “Yes. She’s just become mine. Like you’re mine I guess. She needs me and I don’t know, I like to make things better for her. You too, I’ve noticed.”
Something there in those words.
“I saw her in that cell and from that moment on, she settled in. I like having her around and if I can protect her, gods know she needs someone to keep her safe after what’s happened to her.” He sighed and leaned his head against Julian’s shoulder. “We’ll tell her tomorrow. You’re right, she needs respite right now.”
That’s when Hannah entered the room and then paused, blushing as her big brown eyes took them in. Not embarrassed. But perhaps hesitant to interrupt.
Vincenz held a hand out to her. “Come make us feel better by having a meal. Julian’s been cooking, which is why it smells so good. And there’s more cake.” He’d decided to try not to push about how she was feeling. But he could see her hesitation and he didn’t want it.
She took his hand and he guided her toward the table. Julian bent backward a little to kiss her as she passed and she blushed, smiling.
“You two are going to flirt me into heart palpitations.”
Vincenz bowed after he pulled her chair out. “I like to hear you with a smile in your voice.”
Julian put a bowl of soup before her. “First course. I just like it when she talks. Tea will be ready in a little while. I’m starving. Haven’t eaten since this morning. From now on, you’re included in our discussions about treatment.”
Vincenz handed her a piece of buttered bread as he nodded.
“I’m sorry I yelled at you. I know you didn’t mean it the way it felt.”
And it was past.
They settled in at the table and began to talk. In the beginning, she’d talked a lot to herself but not always to them. Or when she did it was halting as she seemed to puzzle over how the words fit together.
Julian took it as a challenge, Vincenz knew. He’d never known anyone more talented at interrogation and intelligence gathering than Julian. People just told him things without meaning to. It was magical to watch in the field but with Hannah, it was tender and teasing. Sweet.
“So tell us about yourself.” Julian poured a steaming mug of tea and placed it in front of Hannah.
She took a deep breath. “Cardamom. I haven’t had cardamom in a very long time.” She smiled at Julian and Vincenz’s heart skipped a beat. “You know the story, Julian.” She put her mug down and looked between them. “Tell me about my parents.” Vincenz’s gaze went to Julian. No matter how much they wanted to keep the news until the following day, they had to confront it now that she’d asked.
Vincenz took one of her hands and Julian the other. Her eyes widened and her skin paled.
“Tell me. What I’m imagining can’t be worse than the truth.”
“Your parents were killed. Seven months ago. It was recorded as a robbery gone wrong.”
She pulled her hands back and shoved the chair back with a clatter. Shaking her head, she visibly tried to get herself together and he ached for her.
“Robbery? They lived in an enclave of university and research employees. This was them. They killed my parents. Were they buried properly? Where are their things? Can I go? See it?”
Vincenz hated this part the most. “The university interred them both. Their flat was emptied and assigned to another family. Officially we were told their possessions were sold or trashed. But that’s not always the case so I sent someone out there. I have some boxes of their things. Not a lot, but it was what I could find. I’m sorry.”
“I’d wake up and remember to ask about them. And then it would be time for treatment and then I’d forget. And when I remembered again I was too tired to ask. When they didn’t come I knew something was wrong. But I was afraid to ask. Afraid they’d be hurt or worse. Afraid they’d rejected me because of what had happened. I find myself wishing they’d rejected me. At least they’d be alive.” She headed to the other side of the room and they gave her the space. She looked out at her garden and he watched her reflection in the glass against the dark of night.
“You knew this for how long?”
“I was worried. You’ve had so much to deal with.”
She’d been standing, looking out the back windows over the yard, but when she turned, she pressed her back to the wall where it made the corner.
“How long?” One of her eyebrows rose and the sight of the woman behind all the trauma snagged his attention the way it had earlier in the bathroom when she’d stripped down.
He shoved it away. “From the start.”
She ran her palms up and down her arms and he and Julian looked to each other, unsure as to what to do as she trembled, so close but yet really far removed from them just at the moment.
“We did what we thought was best. They were dead anyway, Hannah. Telling you when you could barely make it through each day wasn’t going to bring them back. We wanted to wait until you’d had some time. Time to find a way to deal with the news.” Julian got up and went to her.
“What about my things? My parents were holding my possessions from my flat. When I moved to take the job with the foundation, we moved my stuff to their storage unit.”
“I can look into that for you.” Vincenz didn’t hold much hope. But he could get started on tracking down people or agencies who might have taken her personal items and maybe track them down for her.
“What did they know? About me?”
“Your mother reported to the Federation contact for your foundation that you hadn’t been in contact for two standard months. It’s in their records. They assured her it was that you must have been so busy. Then the entire staff left suddenly. Literally one day they were there and the next the entire place was abandoned. We’ve got arrest warrants out for them.” He wouldn’t share how the local authorities had mucked it up so dreadfully they might be missing important information because their investigation was so flawed.
“They knew? Do you think that?” She pushed past Julian and paced. Eight steps, reverse, eight steps. He’d seen her do this in moments of stress before. But her hair was still away from her face. She wasn’t hugging her body the way she would have just a month before.
&nb
sp; “I don’t know what they knew. We don’t have enough answers at this point. Just some supposition.”
“Bollocks!” She narrowed her eyes and the rage there hurt to see. “You’re not just average passersby! This is what you both do. Oh don’t be surprised that I figured it out. I’m crazy, not dumb. You have enough clout to hold off the entire Federation Military Corps from using the brain scans on me. You both leave for a few days at a time and never talk about specifics when you return. You have the ability to get me experimental treatment. Obviously the power you wield says you’re both someone important. What do you think?”
Vincenz wisely held back a smile at her attitude. Upset or not, that she could have this heated discussion with them when even just a few weeks prior she could barely even speak to them meant she was improving.
“I think they knew. I think they had a part in your parents’ murder and I think they left to escape to the Imperium. And those who didn’t? They most likely ended up like your parents did.”
“Will you find them?”
“Do you want us to? What then, beautiful Hannah?” Julian moved to her, encircling her from behind, and she relaxed back into his body just a little.
“I want you to figure out what they know and if they hurt my family and did this to me. I think you should kill them.”
Vincenz cocked his head. “Is that really what you want? After all that, you’d have them killed?” Not that he judged that as a bad thing. He just wanted to be sure he got what she meant.
“Yes. I’d like them killed. A lot. If they hurt my parents, they’ve stolen everything from me. Everything. I want them to pay for that. They should pay for that!”
“Come back to the table and finish eating.” Julian spoke to her quietly, his lips to her ear. “We’ll take care of this for you. You know that. But you won’t help anyone if you let yourself get even more run down than you are already.”
She didn’t even know what to feel. She’d been without them for a year, but had always imagined they’d be there when she escaped or was set free. She’d known on some level there was a problem, but she’d been too tired and too afraid to inquire for a long time. But now there was nothing at all. No pictures. Not her Mai’s teapots. Not her father’s medical texts with his neat and very precise notes in the margins. The quilts her mother had brought with her as a dowry from her family.
