Ryan reached out to run her fingers through my hair. It got stuck in a tangle and pulled, and I didn't even flinch. She tucked it behind my ear and I gave her a sleepy smile.
"Did you have fun at your party?" she asked.
"I sure did, peanut," I said. I spoke in an exaggerated sleepy tone to disguise my disappointment.
"Did the people like your crown?"
A stab of heartache hit me at the mention of the tiara, which was in Nico's duffle bag on its way to California.
"They sure did," I said, trying to smile at her even though I wanted to cry.
Talk about waking up on the wrong side of the bed. This was officially the rudest awakening I could have imagined. I never in a million years expected that he'd just be gone. And why had he left me sleeping downstairs all night instead of waking me up to go upstairs with him? Or had he stayed down there with me?
"So where is it?" Ryan asked. She was so bright eyed and bushy-tailed that it was impossible not to smile at her.
"Where's what?" I asked.
"My crown, silly," she said. She reached up and patted the top of my head as if to make sure it wasn't hiding under my hair somewhere.
I instinctually reached up and touched my head as well. "I think I might have to buy you a new one of those, sweetpea," I said.
"You do?" She tilted her head at me with an expression that said she was wondering what in the would could have possibly happened.
"You want some coffee?" Paige interrupted as she was walking off toward the kitchen.
"Thank you, but I'll get up and get it in a second," I said. I focused on Ryan again and smiled sleepily as I patted the seat next to me on the couch. "I had to give your tiara away last night, but I promise I'll buy you a new one."
"Did you have to give it away to someone who didn't have one?" She asked with the sincerity of someone who was talking about me giving food to starving children.
I nodded. "Yep, and he was very thankful."
"You gave it to a boy?" she asked incredulously.
I hadn't even noticed that I said 'he' until she reacted, and I giggled at her shock.
"Why did a boy want it?"
"I don't really know," I said, speaking quietly in a hint for her to do the same. "He just wanted it."
"Who was it?" she asked.
"Who was it? It was, uh, one of Logan's friends."
"Nico-lo-de-on?" she asked.
"Probably," I said.
She thought that was the funniest thing she'd ever heard. She fell back onto the couch giggling her head off.
"Why would Nico-lo-de-on want to wear my tiara?" she asked.
The whole time she spoke, I was urging her to be quiet. "Shhhh, shhhh," I said, patting her knee and leaning over to whisper in her ear. "We don't need to tell everybody I gave it to him."
"Why, would he be embarrassed?" she asked with a serious expression as she sat up.
I nodded.
"Because boys aren't supposed to wear tiaras," she whispered. Her face was so intent that I couldn't contain a smile.
"I don't think he wanted to wear it," I said.
As soon as I said it, her face scrunched up. "Why did he want it, then?"
I didn't know what to say, so I said, "Because he thought it looked pretty on me…"
"…and he wanted to give it to his girlfriend so she can look pretty, too?" she asked.
My heart dropped. "What girlfriend?" I asked, wondering if she'd heard him say something.
She shrugged with wide eyes. "I don't know, but who else would he want to give it to? His mom?"
I smiled and sighed, wondering how I'd gotten this deep into a crazy conversation right when I woke up.
"I think he just wanted to keep it," I said, since she was still waiting for my answer.
"To give to his next girlfriend?"
"Yep," I said, even though it gave me a stomachache to hear that and agree with it.
"I thought you were gonna be Nico's girlfriend," she said. I turned to look down at her when she said it, and she stared up at me with a sweet, adorable smile.
"Why do you say that?" I asked.
Paige came to stand behind me, handing me a cup of coffee. "Thank you," I said as I took it from her. I didn't take a sip right away, but it felt comforting to hold a hot cup of liquid. "Why did you say that?" I asked, focusing on Ryan again once Paige walked off.
"Because I just did," she said.
I wanted her to say more—to tell me everything she had ever thought about Nico, or me, or us as a pair, but that was all her attention span could handle.
Evan woke up in all his favorite uncle glory, and she hopped off of the couch so she could run to the recliner and into his arms.
I sat on the couch, drinking my coffee for the next few minutes while everyone hustled and bustled around the living room and kitchen. I was overwhelmed by how sad I felt that he was no longer there.
I knew his departure was coming, but I honestly hadn't expected it to be that hard for me. I thought back to all the other times I had fallen for him on a trip and then been forced to say goodbye, but this one felt different somehow. This time, I was convinced he liked me back just as much as I liked him. This time, I thought for sure there would have been a heartfelt goodbye and maybe even plans to talk to each other again.
I decided to go for a run in hopes that the physical excursion would clear my mind. I was just about get up and get dressed when Evan came to sit next to me on the couch.
"You were out like a light last night," he said, leaning back.
"Why didn't y'all wake me up?" I asked.
"I wanted to, but Nico wouldn't let us," he said. "Were you uncomfortable down here?"
"He wouldn't let you do what?" I asked.
"You fell asleep on him, and he said he'd sooner take me outside and skin me alive than wake you up and tell you to go to bed."
I smiled. "He said that?"
Evan smiled. "Not in those words, but basically."
"So he slept down here with me?" I asked.
Evan nodded and pointed to the nearby recliner. "And I slept right there just to make sure he didn't try anything."
"Why didn't they wake us up before they left?" I asked.
He shrugged. "I slept, too." He paused and looked at me with an earnest expression that was rare for someone as easy-going as Evan. "Please tell me he didn't hurt you," he said.
My stomach was already in knots, and for some reason Evan's words made it worse. I was hurting, but not in the way Evan thought—or maybe it was the way he thought. I was too confused to know, really. Either way, I felt like I wanted to cry.
"Did he?" Evan pressed, looking perturbed by my hesitation.
"No, Evan, of course not. Why would you even ask something like that?"
"Because, I see how you are with him, Mia, and then he sits you down on the stairs, and kisses you, and probably makes you all sorts of promises he can't keep just so he can…" Evan trailed off, not wanting to say what Nico could do.
"So he can what?" I asked, feeling blood rise to my cheeks.
"I just don't want him hurting you."
"He's not," I said. "He's gone, and I'm fine with it," I added, even though it was a blatant lie. "And he didn’t make any promises," I added.
We were quiet for a minute before he said, "You don't need to mention to Cody that I let you sleep down here."
I regarded him with a why would you even say that expression that made him smile. "Cody doesn't want you having anything to do with him, and I was supposed to keep an eye on you last night." He paused, shaking his head. "He'd kill me if he saw what y'all were doing last night on the stairs."
I gasped and pushed at my brother's shoulder. "Evan Michael, I really hope you weren't spying on me!"
"I wasn't until I went out there to tell you guys the movie was starting."
I shook my head at him. "Well, it's none of yours or Cody's business," I said.
He sighed. "I'm just glad he's gone."
"That's the problem exactly."
"There's no problem," I said, standing up. "Nothing happened, he's gone, and I'm fine—end of story."
"Good," he said. "Good talk."
I shot him an overly sweet, fake smile as I threw the blanket onto the couch. "Good talk," I agreed sarcastically.
I walked upstairs feeling numbly disoriented and ticked off at the same time. Part of me wanted to collapse onto the couch upstairs for a whole day, and part of me wanted to put on my running shoes and take off running until I felt better, which might be a few years straight like Forrest Gump. I opted for the running shoes, knowing I'd be better off breaking a sweat than hiding under the covers all day.
Chapter 15
I ran for what must have been a few miles before turning around. I did a lot of soul searching as I ran. I don't know how many times I had to remind myself that Nico lived in California and I lived in Carolina. By the time I was done sweating it out, I had come to one simple conclusion. Trust God. Period. If it wasn't meant to be with Nico, then God had something better waiting for me. I made a conscious decision to have faith in that even though my brain couldn’t fathom anyone being better for me than him.
Evan, Cody, and Paige (along with a few others) were down at the beach when I got back, so I stayed with them, swimming and making sand sculptures. We were planning on leaving the following afternoon, so it was our last full day. Ryan reminded us of that every time one of us mentioned abandoning the sandcastle in favor of heading to the house.
It was after noon by the time we went inside for lunch, and since I hadn't eaten breakfast, my stomach had been growling for at least a few hours. I didn't have much of an appetite, but I pretended to enjoy half of one of my dad's famous grilled cheese sandwiches.
It was nearly 2PM when I went upstairs to check my phone. I had been so discombobulated by Nico's departure that I hadn't even looked at it all day. I took it onto the third floor balcony, assuming I'd have a few emails and texts to read.
I almost stopped breathing when I looked at the screen and saw that I had a missed call from Nico earlier that morning. I had other missed calls and texts, but I completely blocked them out once I saw Nico's name.
You might be wondering how I had Nico's information programmed into my phone, and the answer is that Charlotte gave me his number one time when I was visiting L.A. and we thought we might need to call him for a ride. I had never contacted him, and he had never contacted me, but I had carried his number around with me for years.
My stomach was churning as I pressed the appropriate buttons to listen to his message. Well, I pressed almost all of the appropriate buttons, at least. I had one last button to push and I stood there with my thumb hovering over it as if it might detonate some bomb.
"Do it," I said out loud even though I was talking to myself.
I did it.
I pushed the button and held the phone to my ear.
"Baby girl," I heard his deep voice say, making me instantly gooey inside. "I did not want to leave you without saying goodbye, and I'm so sorry it worked out that way. Denise and Rob assumed we set an alarm, so by the time they got downstairs and saw that we were still sleeping, we only had about five minutes to grab our stuff and get out the door. I wanted to wake you up, but there just wasn't enough time… I'm coming!" He yelled all of a sudden in an annoyed tone as if someone was urging him to hang up. It startled me, and I pulled the phone away from my ear for a second. "Mia, I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry and I wish we had more time. I'll call you again once we land in L.A." He paused and sighed as if unsure of what to say next. "Take care, okay? I'll talk to you soon."
I heard the familiar beep that meant that was the end of the message, and I pulled the phone from my ear as I stared blankly at the expansive ocean in front of me. I smiled and bit my lip imagining how rushed they must have been to get out of the door that morning. I still hated the fact that he was gone, but his message made it a little easier to swallow.
I looked at the clock on my phone to see what time it was. It read 2:24, and I wondered where Nico was at that very moment. They must be in California by now. Logan had to be back for some event, which was why they had to leave early in the first place. They were flying on a private jet, and I had heard them mention a number of times (this year and in the past) that it was a five-hour trip. If their flight left at eight o'clock this morning… I stopped and ticked off the hours one by one on my fingers… that meant they were in L.A. by now.
I checked for another message. I thought he said he would call once they landed in L.A., and I felt a pang of disappointment that I hadn't heard from him again. I listened to his message again. Not only did I love the sound of his voice, but I also wanted to double check that he had promised to call me when they got to California. He did promise. He said he'd call again once they landed in L.A., and my heart sank, wondering if and when I'd hear from him again.
I took a deep breath and told myself to calm down. After all, they had probably only been there an hour or so, and they likely had tons of stuff to do when they first got back.
I had two texts and two voicemails from Charlotte, so I took a look at those. The texts had come in an hour before and both of them said I should call her. She must have gotten tired of waiting, because five minutes after she sent the texts, she called. I pushed the buttons to listen to her first voicemail and put the phone to my ear.
"Mia, it's Charlotte. We're home. I, uh, just wanted to give you a call to tell you… I'm not really sure how to say this, but, well, I don't know what went down with you and Nico, or if it had anything to do with it, but something happened with him on the flight home."
My heart sank when she said, "something happened". My brain automatically went to some type of disaster… maybe that's why he hadn't called. I paced the balcony as I continued listening to her message.
"He, uh, I mean, like I said, I don't know if it has anything to do with you or not, but on the way home, he started asking us about—" BEEP!
The message cut off abruptly and the beeping noise startled me.
I obviously wasted no time getting to the second message she sent. My hands were shaking and I was breathless as I pushed the buttons to listen.
"Sorry, I got cut off," were her first words. "Anyway, I was trying to say that Nico started asking mom about God on the trip home. He was really sincere, and he seemed to understand that he'd been missing something." She paused and sighed. "It was really special, and I'm thankful I got to be a part of it."
I could tell by the sound of her voice that she was tearing-up just talking about it. For goodness sake, I was tearing-up just listening to the message.
"I just thought I'd call and let you know," she continued. "Like I said, I'm not sure if it had anything to do with whatever's going on between you guys, but I wanted you to know. Call me when you get this. I love you, and I had fun this week. Okay, bye."
The phone beeped again, and I took a deep breath as I stared blankly at my feet, or the chair, or whatever was in front of me. I took a few seconds to stop my tears and calm my nerves before calling her back.
She picked up on the second ring. "Did you get my message?" was the first thing she said when she answered.
"Yes," I said. "That's so awesome."
"It was," she said. "He was really chill about it like Nico is, but he's the one who brought it up. We all started talking to him about it, and before I knew it, his life was changed just like that."
"That makes me want to cry," I said.
She laughed on the other end. "Oh, you should have seen me and my mom, we were crying like little babies."
"That's amazing," I said.
It was probably the last thing I expected her to say when she called, so I still felt slightly dazed by the news. Ultimately, I knew it was the best thing that could have happened for him, but unfortunately for me, it only
made me want him even more. As if he wasn't tempting enough before this, now he had salvation working in his favor. I let out a long sigh at the thought.
"What's wrong?" she asked when she heard me.
"Nothing," I said. "That's awesome news."
"I know. I'm so happy for him."
"Me too," I said.
"Have you talked to him?" she asked.
"He left me a message this morning to say he was sorry for not saying goodbye."
She laughed. "That was crazy. My dad was ticked about us forgetting to set an alarm."
"I'm glad y'all made it in time and had a safe trip," I said. I wanted to ask where Nico was right then, but I didn’t. I figured he'd call if and when he was ready.
"I love you," she said. "And I'm glad we got to hang out."
"I love you, too," I said. "I had fun."
"Me too. I'll talk to you later, okay?"
"Okay," I said. "Thanks for calling and letting me know."
"Of course. Bye Mia Beans. Have fun tonight."
She hadn't called me Mia Beans since we were kids, and it made me smile.
"I will," I said. "Love you."
"Love you, too."
I hung up the phone and sat in a nearby patio chair with a sigh. That was a crazy bit of news to follow a crazy, emotional day. Obviously, I was happy for him, but hearing the news was sort of bitter sweet for me since it only made me miss him more.
I immediately started thinking about when I could plan a trip out west for a visit. I thought maybe I could make it happen within the next few months. I wondered if he would even want that or if he would get home and be swept away with his life and forget all about the connection we had.
I let my head flop onto the back of the chair, closing my eyes as the bright sunlight hit my face. I stayed like that for ten or fifteen minutes before heading inside. I kept my phone in my pocket just in case Nico tried to call, but he never did. I figured he might have had to go with Logan to whatever event they had to get back for, and that he would call when he could.
The rest of the afternoon passed quickly, and before I knew it, we were going out to dinner. We ate at one of our favorite, family-style Italian restaurants, laughing and telling stories about things that happened all through the week.
Back to the Beach (Hunt Family Book 4) Page 10
